Nu's Patented Awkward Conversations Chapter 5

Nu is like Rubber

"Ragna, can Nu come wi—OUCH!" Nu said as Ragna whacked her on the head. Nu rubbed her head and looked up at Ragna.

"What did you do tha—OUCH!" Another whack. Ragna looked down at the girl.

"I am going to do this because I'm sure that every sentence you say now will be wrong." He said readying for another whack. Nu ducked and ran out of the room.

"NU WILL WIN THIS BATTLE, RA—OUCH!" Nu yelled as she was hit in the head by a flying apple. Ragna looked at the unconscious girl and decided to go take a nap in his room.

"Nu, are you alright?" Nu heard a voice say as she felt herself being lifted to her feet. She opened her eyes and saw her friend Tsubaki.

"TSUKI, NU MISSED YOU!" Nu yelled squeezing the girl in a hug. Tsubaki returned the hug and asked why Nu was asleep on the floor.

"Oh, Nu's head just hurts a bit from Ragna pounding Nu all d—OUCH" Nu said as she fell forward from getting hit in the head by another flying apple.

"I told you, Nu" Ragna said seeing the swirly-eyed girl on the ground.


Noel and Nu are sitting at the table playing cards since the TV isn't working.

"Nu, has Ragna called someone to fix your TV yet? It must get pretty boring here not being able to play your Xbox or watch TV." Noel said. Nu just looked up and smiled at the blonde girl.

"No, Nu doesn't really get bored with Ragna around. We are always finding new ways to make things more exc—OUCH!" Nu fell over at the sound of a thump. Noel looked for the source and found a lone apple still spinning on the ground. She looked to the shadows and saw a pair of eyes flash before disappearing.



Ragna was asleep in his room snoring loudly. He hadn't gotten much sleep lately since his resolution to whack Nu every time she spoke. Nu opened his door and tip-toed into his room as quietly as she could manage.

"Maybe if Nu is quiet, Ragna won't whack her. Where does he get all of the apples though? Nu must find them." Nu said searching through Ragna's room. Ragna was still snoring loudly. She looked behind his lifesize Haruhi Suzumiya doll and found a small bag of apples.

"Nu, has found them." She said. She turned around to leave the room. Once she reached the door she giggled to herself.

"Nu can outlast Ragna in th-OUCH!" Nu yelped as an apple hit her head from behind. She fell forward with swirly eyes and Ragna stepped out from behind the door.

"I knew you would fall for that." Ragna said smirking.

"Nu can take the beating as long as you give them, Ragna…" Nu said as she passed out again. Ragna decided not to throw his weapon of choice at her. He just pushed her out of his room with his foot and shut his door.

Nu just lay on the ground with drool coming out of her mouth and a bump growing on her head.


Nu was sitting on the couch watching TV with Hazama while Ragna was out grocery shopping.

"So, Nu, I see that you have a few bumps on your head. Has Ragna been sticking it to you that hard these days?" Hazama sneered. He loved being the king of trolls. Nobody could out troll him in any right…well, maybe except Vegito…I mean the dude fought as candy for god's sake.

"Nu, is fine. Nu get's to play with Ragna while he pelts Nu with his apples. Although, they are pretty hard most of th-DING DONG!" Nu was cut off by the doorbell.

"NU WILL GET IT!" She screamed jumping to the door. She opened it to find a delivery boy dressed in what seemed to be full white body armor with no face. He had a black hat on that read "LINUAH'S DELIVERY SERVICE"

"Is the girl named Nu here? I have a delivery with very specific instructions that I must complete before the hour is gone." The delivery boy said with a grunt.

"I am Nu. What do you have for N—OUCH!" Nu said as she had an apple thrown at her head by the delivery boy who then walked away dropping a letter onto the girl's unconscious body.

"NU, SHUT UP!" Is what the letter read.


Nu was sitting in her room trying to think of a way to get around Ragna's apple throwing assault. Why he chose apples she didn't know. They really hurt though. Nu did a fist pump to show her determination.

"Nu will win this. Nu's womanhood depends on it. Ragna won't catch Nu with her head in the clouds again. Nu will be on Ragna like—BEEP" Nu said as she heard her computer beep with an IM.

"Oh hey it's from Ragna…That's weird…it's blank except for a file he sent with it." Nu said as she clicke the file to open it. Her computer hummed while loading the file and it opened a black box on her screen.

"Hmm? What is this? Nu is confu—OUCH!" Nu screamed as an apple flew out from the black box and hit her square on the forehead. She fell out of her chair and onto the ground while a message appeared on her computer screen. How Ragna managed these impossible feats was beyond anything she knew. Logic was literally flying out the window.




Chapter 5 is up and I know this is quite a strange chapter, but I figured it fit in just fine. Let me know what you guys think. Please R&R