Disclaimer: One Piece is the property of Eiichiro Oda. Author's notes are at the bottom.
Roronoa Zoro was convinced that the woman out in the garden was a murderess, or something equally dangerous.
If she wasn't a murderess, then she was at least a stalker. She had been out in the garden of Zoro's dojo for half an hour now, walking around and, weirdest of all, she was just touching things. It was this that made Zoro wonder if she was a schizophrenic that escaped from the nearby mental hospital, but he abandoned the thought upon closer inspection of her. She was too well put together to fit the crazy person bill. Her long, black hair fell neatly down to her narrow waist; she was pale and curvy, and her tight leather vest and long wraparound skirt showed it; she wore red-lensed sunglasses and carried a notebook with her. Zoro had to admit that she was beautiful, but, he couldn't trust a trespasser.
Therefore, when Zoro slipped the last of his three swords into the green haramaki around his waist, he kept his eyes - well, eye, as his left one was sealed shut - on the woman for as long as he could before leaving the room and stalking out into the courtyard. Johnny and Yosaku sat there with a bottle of sake, not paying any mind to the group of children whacking each other with and fighting over about six bokken. Zoro groaned, annoyed at the fact that he'd entrusted the children's safety to the two oafs.
While peeling one child off the other, Zoro glared at Johnny and Yosaku. "You idiots, someone could've gotten an eye poked out!"
"Why? Would that make you feel more at home?" Yosaku covered his left eye and nudged Johnny, both of them cackling.
Zoro groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Just watch the damn kids!"
Both of the other men mimicked Zoro's voice, making it deeper and albeit more annoying than it actually was, and the kids joined in. Rather than threatening to slash his "friends" in half and ordering the children to do suicides for every crack in the stone floor, Zoro resumed his spying on the strange woman and began to approach her.
"Oi, woman," Zoro boomed as soon as he was within earshot of her. She looked up and he folded his muscular, tan arms across his chest, scowling. "Trespassing is a crime."
Curiously, slowly, the woman pushed her sunglasses up onto her forehead. She began to walk towards him, her pink high heels clacking against the stone path. Zoro dropped his right hand over the hilts of his swords, hoping to stop her in her tracks. Instead, the woman kept walking until she was an arm's length away from Zoro. She replied, "The gate was wide open."
"Ne, woman, that doesn't matter," Zoro spat, though he mentally kicked himself for napping instead of double-checking to see if Johnny locked the entry gate. "What the hell are you doing here?"
The woman blinked - and, damn, were her eyes ever blue - and then smiled. She extended her right hand out to Zoro. "My name is Nico Robin. I write for the Ohara Times. I'm not sure of whether or not you've heard of it, but I'm here on something like a business trip. I wanted to see about your dojo."
Zoro narrowed his eye as he shook the woman's beautifully soft hand. Still, he couldn't help but give into the smirk that twitched at his lips. There were people from other countries who knew about him, and that pleased him greatly. Plus, it didn't hurt that there was a very visually appealing woman wanting to know more about him. "Really, now?"
"Yes, sir. I heard about the championships and I felt compelled to interview you on your motive and your methods." Robin explained. "You obviously must be doing something right if your... students, so to speak, do so well at competitions."
Zoro pursed his lips when he realized that she was looking past him at the plethora of kids acting up and hitting each other. "They're not always like that. Just gotta... get their butts in gear sometimes."
The woman gave a polite laugh and Zoro was bordering on infatuated when he heard such a beautiful noise. Not only was her smile one of the most beautiful things he had ever witnessed since, say, the pure white hilt of Wado Ichimonji, but her laugh was musical. Almost angelic, like the aforementioned sword's movements...
And then he caught himself. He compared a woman that he just met to a sword to which he dedicated his whole life. Was she really that captivating that she was in the same caliber as Wado Ichimonji in terms of beauty and grace?
Zoro's face turned sour. "Anyway, what do you want again? I'm busy."
Robin cocked an eyebrow, lowering her shades over her eyes. "Well, then. I can see that I'm taking up your time. I'll be going now... and I strongly advise you to close and lock your gates. I almost had my bag stolen three times on the way here. There were never this many thieves in Ohara, that is for goddamn certain."
Zoro gave an awkward chuckle, looking back at Johnny and Yosaku. They had moved into plain sight, making vulgar hand gestures and chuckling like the oafs Zoro saw them as. He rolled his eye and turned back, only to see the woman walking away. "W-Wait!"
Robin turned as Zoro staggered up to her. "Oh? I see you've decided to fit some time in your busy schedule for me."
"I thought that, maybe, we could meet up later. If you're still interested in that interview." Zoro offered. "And... maybe we could get to know each other?"
Her smile was sly, yet, warm. Zoro sputtered, "I-I'm free this evening, if you want to come over."
The female nodded slowly. She bit her bottom lip. "I'll come by around eight, then."
Zoro allowed her to walk away this time. He sighed quietly. She may have been a schizophrenic murderess, but, now, she was a schizophrenic murderess with which he technically had a date.
Hi there, dear reader, and thank you for choosing to read this story. Essentially, this is a drabble collection based on a list of thirty words I found on Tumblr. The words will be listed throughout as the chapter titles, as you can see above. They won't necessarily be in chronological order, but they'll all revolve around this first oneshot. I hope you all enjoy it, because I'm very proud of the ones I've written so far. See you next chapter!