Here it is. Finally. I'm sorry for the delay but seriously, this is like my tenth edit or something. You know what, I'm tired of apologizing. I'm not sorry for the delay. I have been up to my ears in college apps and finals and keeping my grades up plus I'm working even more hours at my jobs. So no, I'm not sorry for the delay. XP
Disclaimer: Still not mine.
"And there you go, Takahashi-san. As good as new!" Misaki sighed and experimentally swung his legs as the nurse disposed of his old casts. It was weird having them off. Somehow his legs felt a little too cold and a little too naked. He shot a glance at the wheelchair sitting innocently next to the white hospital bed where he sat. This was the last they would be seeing of each other and the green-eyed teen couldn't say he would regret their parting.
"Do you want to try walking?" The question was delivered with a warm hand landing softly between his shoulder blades. Misaki looked up at his the man standing beside him.
"Yeah." Three months had robbed him of much of the muscle mass in his legs making him trip and fall on the first of his attempted steps across the grey linoleum floor. He was not scared though, even as he began to tip precariously forward and his face started to hasten in decent towards the floor. Before he could even blink a pair of strong arms had wrapped themselves around his waist from behind in a solid grip.
"Anytime." A quick kiss was planted on the back of his neck before Akihiko continued in a gentle voice, "How about you hold onto me this time." It was not a question. Both males seemed to have entirely forgotten the nurse who was currently pressing herself against the wall, trying to go unnoticed as her face flush a bright cherry red from the live BL she was witnessing.
Misaki's next attempt resulted in a total of three steps before the tip of his left foot caught behind the heel of his right and he was once more careening towards the ground. Luckily the older man's arm around his waist prevented him from going far.
"This is harder than I thought."
"I'm sure you'll get used to it again. We just need to work a little on building up those leg muscles." The suggestive tone of his voice and the arrogant smirk Akihiko sent his way did not produce the desired blush though. Instead, the teen's face turned a ghastly white as all blood drained out at the thought of sex. Akihiko sighed internally. It seemed he still had a while to wait until he would once against be making his Misaki writhe beneath him. He masked his disappointment though with an encouraging smile. A slight tugging on his sleeve from Misaki told him that the boy wanted to try walking again on his own and with some hesitation he released his lover. He remained tense though as he leaned against the bed, ready to spring forward at the slightest hint of a wobble.
"Come on now, try again."
Five steps later and the brunette was at the hospital room door, panting lightly, but sporting a triumphant smile across a slightly flushed face. Akihiko was still near the bed, his lips forming an equally if not wider smile as he clapped softly at Misaki's accomplishment.
"I did it!"
"I knew you could. It's like riding a bike. You can't just forget how to walk after all." In two swift strides the author was standing next to his lover, both hands settling once more on the teen's slender waist. His lover's frame had filled out once again over the months of rehabilitation and Akihiko could truthfully say he would not be missing the painful way Misaki's hip bones used to jut out into his palm every time he would place his hands on this same spot. Still, the teen was painfully skinny and sometimes the older man couldn't help but feel that just one misplaced touch would break his younger lover into pieces.
"I think this calls for a little celebration. Wouldn't you say?" Akihiko asked and Misaki looked at him suspiciously.
"What are yo-"
"Wait! Before you leave I need Takahashi-kun to fill out his forms!" It seemed the nurse had finally snapped out of her BL induced trance and realized she needed to intervene or risk losing her patient. Akihiko could only glare menacingly at the woman for her interruption. The sudden noise had sent Misaki practically jumping into his arms and he held an arm in front of the teen protectively.
"Just some forms? That's all we need to do before we go?"
"Y-yes. Just a few signatures. If you could please…" The frightened nurse trailed off under the heat of Akihiko's glare, holding out a clipboard and pen in her shaking hands. Akihiko's glare was very reminiscent of the demon Kamijou's, which in its self was a sure sign that it should not to be taken lightly. Briskly, the author grabbed the items and began to speed read through the forms finding them to be nothing but methods of payments along with a few waivers and a pamphlet containing instructions on how to take the different pills Misaki had been assigned. Misaki watched in fascination as the lavender irises moved speedily back and forth as his lover looked everything over.
"Usagi-san, what do they want?"
"Nothing to concern yourself with," Akihiko replied absently and an adorable pout formed across Misaki's face as he slowly lifted himself up on tip toe to see around his lover's wide shoulders.
"Usagi-san! Those are bills! You can't just put your information there!"
"I can and I will,"
"But I'm the one who was injured. I should be the one paying," The silver haired male slowly turned to face his petite boyfriend at the exclamation of this protest.
"Misaki, for me, paying these bills means no difference than going down to the corner store and buying a pack of cigarettes. You on the other hand have no source of income and will thus be letting me pay."
"But I have savings,"
"I refuse to let you suffer anymore because of those bastards. Your savings will stay in your bank where we will hopefully never see it again, because Misaki, I like buying things for you and we shall both pray that the day I can no longer do that never comes. Understood?" Misaki just scowled at the ground, his arms crossed but still leaning heavily on his rabbit.
Akihiko sighed deeply. He hated it when Misaki got mad at him, but he also hated it when he was in some way unable to help his lover, whether it was paying the hospital bills or assisting him in walking across the room. Worst of all, he hated the expression that currently marred his adorable lover's angelic features. Slowly, making sure Misaki knew what he was doing the whole time; he placed a hand beneath the boy's chin and lifted the uke's face to his. One passionate kiss later and Akihiko was back to signing papers, this time with a blushing Misaki hanging from his arm.
Finally the papers were done, the nurse blissfully gone, and they were standing out in front of the hospital for, what Misaki hoped, was the last time. He could see the bright red sports car now and he didn't think he had ever been more eager to get into its expensive leather interior. His legs were practically collapsing under him from exertion. Akihiko had noticed but knew this was a matter of pride for his lover and didn't offer to help, instead silently tensing the muscles in the arm Misaki was using for support.
It was only when they in the car and driving down the street did Misaki realized they weren't driving towards the pent house.
"Um, Usagi-san…where are we going?"
"Can't tell you."
"It's a surprise," Misaki eyed him carefully, his hands crossed in front of his slim chest.
"Is it a surprise I'm going to like?"
"I certainly hope so."
The next ten minutes of the ride progressed in a silent contentment that could only be achieved between two people who felt nothing but absolute comfort with the other's presence. Misaki spent the ride looking out the window as he watched the pedestrians on the street go about their busy lives. Akihiko had one hand on the steering wheel while the other was holding onto Misaki's in a gentle grip, his thumb rubbing slow calming circles over the back of his beloved's palm. He knew Misaki still wasn't comfortable leaving the sanctuary of the pent house, but he wanted his uke to enjoy this. He didn't know what it would be to Misaki, but to him this day was going to be the wrapping up of loose ends, a closure of sorts. Just like the end of one of his books. There was always something satisfying about writing the last few pages. Beginnings were messy and middles gave him headaches, but endings were satisfying.
"Usagisan…I'm not alive right now am I." Akihiko shot a swift glance towards the boy only to see that he hadn't shifted his position at all and was still staring blankly out the window. For a second he thought he had imagined the question but the sudden tightening of Misaki's grip on his hand told him that that wasn't the case.
"Why would you think that Misaki?"
"Because I mean…I am alive, as in I'm breathing and everything. But I'm not really living at the same time."
"I'm afraid you're going to have to elaborate."
"I'm not really sure I can." There was more silence then, "When people are alive, they have a life. They go out and do things you know. Like going shopping and going to school. They go see friends and listen to loud movies. I can't really do any of that right now. If you weren't there, these last four months I probably wouldn't have stepped one foot out of the apartment. Or already be locked up in a padded room enjoying the confines of my very own strait jacket. Seeing any one who isn't you or seeing them when you aren't around is so terrifying for me that I go into a panic attack and practically asphyxiate myself. The same with loud movies. Heck, if you weren't here I would have probably killed myself a long time ago."
"Don't say that." Now it was Akihito's turn to tighten the grip on their joined hands.
"It's the truth Usagisan. We fought so hard not to die and yet now that it's over we don't even know how to live. How do we do it? How do we move beyond all of this misery?"
Silence fell as Akihiko tried desperately to find an answer. Misaki had turned all the way in his seat and was looking at him desperately, his small hand grasping the elder's in a vice grip as he pleaded with his eye. But Akihiko could only find one answer and though he realized it wasn't what Misaki wanted to hear, he knew it was the only way.
"One step at a time. Just put one foot in front of the other and keep walking forward. Baby steps. It's all we can do right now."
"Is that it?" Akihiko nodded.
"It's what we've been doing. You've improved Misaki. Even though it seems like a small thing, you were able to answer the doorbell yesterday without my being there. And last week you talked to Miyagisan while Takatsukisan and I were in other rooms. Isn't that an improvement?"
"Yeah, I guess." Slowly the teen settled back into his car seat. "But it's still a long ways from my being able to go grocery shopping by myself."
"Misaki, I doubt I will ever let you go grocery shopping by yourself again. Not after what happened last time."
"So you think we can really do it? Return to normal that is. It seems kind of impossible right now. You don't just bring back the dead after all."
"Misaki when you were taken I was left to believe you had died. And despite that you still came back to me. I don't think we'll ever be able to return to how we were, but who's to say that what we have now is not better. Personally I've become very fond of my bold little Misaki."
"I'm not bold."
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not."
Suddenly the brunette teen burst into a fit a giggles, the first time he had done so in more than a year and Akihiko couldn't help but add his own hearty laugh upon hearing it. They were acting no better than children. If any proof was needed that they were moving on, then this was it. Life was moving one and it really did look like it was heading in a positive direction.
"Yes?" Without warning the brunette lifted himself of the seat and delivered a chaste kiss to the older man's cheek.
"I love you."
"I love you too." Before Misaki could realize what was happening Akihito had lifted up their connected hands and was planting a kissing the upon the other's pale knuckles, causing Misaki's already flushed face to redden until the vibrant hue had spread to below his shirt collar. Together they returned to how they were originally save that this time both men were sporting identical smiles, although Akihiko's was bordering more on a smirk than a grin. But that was just Akihiko, and Misaki had no trouble at all seeing the love and tenderness behind the expression. Ten minutes passed before Misaki chose to open his mouth again.
"Usagi-san. Are we heading towards the amusement park?"
"The college student gets an A."
"Oh, be quiet. I'm trying not to think about having to repeat a whole year at university. And what's with that new smile? What are you hiding?"
"If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise."
"Never mind then, I can guess." A small squeeze to Misaki's hand was the only response Akihiko gave and once again the next few minutes were filled with silence.
"There are a lot of people at amusement parks."
"There won't be today. It's a week day and it's still early in the morning."
"So it won't be crowded?"
"Just around the middle of the afternoon. But I'll be there so don't worry. I want you to just think of this as a reward. Today's trip will act as a mile stone after all the tiny steps we've taken. I think you're ready. Now all we need is for you to think the same thing."
"I…think I can do this." The grip on Akihiko's hand had once again become a steel vise but the elder did not mind. He knew he was Misaki's strength, and if Misaki felt he had to hold on tightly so as to not be swept away by the flood waters then Akihiko was going to be there as his anchor and nothing in the world would ever be strong enough to lodge him from his position.
In no time at all Akihiko was pulling into a parking lot and together they emerged from the comfortable interior of the car. Immediately after locking the doors, Akihiko was at Misaki's side and grasping his hand once more in his own. He led the brunette towards the amusement park where they had ridden the Ferris wheel not so long ago. Misaki pressed tightly to his lover's side, but otherwise he was relaxed. It really wasn't that crowded and come to think of it, the rides did look a little tempting. The bright color along with the sounds of laughter and music began to make Misaki's heart beat faster but this time in excitement rather than panic.
The silver haired rabbit bent slightly and planted a kiss upon his lover's brow. Misaki was looking at him, a small smile gracing his lips and a light was dancing in his eye. A light that Akihiko realized he had been missing sorely.
"Which one should we go on first?" It was a sentence that signaled a turning point for the couple.
Throughout the day they went on so many rides and played so many different games that if you asked Misaki later he would tell you that honestly, after a while, he couldn't distinguish one from the other. He would remember vaguely a few, like the one where they had been loaded into a plastic log floating in an artificial river. Really though, the only reason he could recall that one was because, halfway through the ride one particular splash had landed on Akihiko's face. To Misaki's surprise, the author had shaken his head wildly and together they laughed it off. Misaki doubted though that he could ever forget the sight of the man's silver hair sparkling in the sunlight from the hundreds of tiny crystal droplets that had clung to his shining strands, and for a few brief seconds made it so that he seemed to glow in Misaki's vision.
He had ended up leaning too far forward in his quest to inspect in a more intimate nature the miniature stars that clung to his lover's eye lashes, and Akihiko had taken advantage of the proximity of the teen's lips in order to claim them as his own. For a wonderful, solid five minutes. Misaki could only thank the fates that the couple had been seated on the very last seat of the ride and thus didn't have that big of an audience, just anyone who had happened to look up from the ground below.
Misaki's blush had still not faded when they had disembarked from the roller coaster, and faint traces of it lingered as he sat at a table under the shadow of an umbrella and waited for Usagi-san to return with their drinks. He had been the one to tell Akihiko to get the refreshments. There had only been one table left, at the farthest back, crammed into a corner, and he hadn't wanted to lose it just because he desired to cling by the side of his lover all throughout the rides. Also though, inwardly, he wanted to prove to himself what Akihiko had told him in the car. He was able to do this. He was able to go out by himself in society and interact like a normal person. Just the other day, Shinobu had arrived at their apartment all by himself. He had taken the train and walked the busy streets of Tokyo alone. If Shinobu could do it, then why couldn't he?
"Because Shinobu was only there for two months," a voice in the back of his mind whispered maliciously. He shook his head. "No, that's not an excuse." Two months was a long enough time to experience intimately the nature of events that had gone on within that miniature version of Hell.
With the familiar thoughts running amok in his mind, he began to feel a little uncomfortable and within the timespan of a few seconds he had gone deathly pale. It was the first time since waking up in the hospital that he was finally alone, without his rabbit being constantly by his side, easing his nerved-wrack emotions, and the feelings that suddenly consumed him were not pleasant. He suddenly felt naked, vulnerable. The wind was too cold and the park too loud. Around him people swarmed, laughing, chattering. He could not look at them. He was afraid that they would be smiling. He hated the smiles of strangers. Somehow they all just looked a little too forced, a little too much like a mask. Who knew what they were really thinking beneath that thin layer that appeared on the surface.
Slowly he brought his knees up to his chest. He was still small and could easily fit the whole of his curled up body onto the seat of the flimsy wire chair, a feat which he did not hesitate in doing. He knew Akihiko wasn't far. He knew if he called for him, his lover would immediately come running. He could even see a glimpse of the man's white hair through the crowd that separated them. Misaki didn't take his eye off it. With a single-minded intensity he stared at the small view he had of his beloved, as if his life depended on the fact that he never turned his eyes away. And if not his life, then at least his sanity. This small view was his lifeline and he was not going to give it up.
Suddenly, a great force collided with his chair and he was obliged to practically throw himself across the table in order to stay upright. For a brief second his eye left the strip of silver in the crowd, and that was all it took for him to lose sight of his rabbit. His breath hitched and his heart began to palpitate frantically. Desperately, a singular dilated eye searched the crowd before him, but Akihiko had disappeared without a trace. The teen was about to jump to his feet and run towards the mass of people when a familiar voice cut through his panic.
"Oji-chan! Oji-chan!" It couldn't be. It couldn't. He had told himself never again.
Slowly he turned his head to look down at the small child that had charged full force into his chair.
"Mahiro-chan! What are you doing here?"
"I came here with Daddy. Mommy's gone right now so Daddy said we could go and play on the rides!" Hearing this, Misaki's eyes jerked up from the toddler that was currently clinging to his jeans and he spotted the black hair and thin spectacles that he knew beyond a doubt belonged to his brother. A small whimper escaped the teen's throat as the figure of the man approached all too quickly.
"Misaki! Fancy meeting you here! It's been forever! Are you here with your girlfriend?" Misaki took in the eager and expectant face of his brother and felt like he was about to either pass out or throw up. The world was spinning, the colors around him blending and meshing together. Why was his brother acting so cheerful? It was almost as if he had forgotten their confrontation from before. But most importantly, where was Usagi-san?!
Takahiro looked down at his brother in confusion and at the back of his mind a slight annoyance sprang up. Why didn't he answer? What was the matter with him? The boy's pupil had darkened to an almost pitch black and his one good eye was wide and was staring at him as if it had seen a ghost. Takahiro turned to look behind him. Perhaps Misaki had seen one of the men whom he knew from before? He knew the experience had to have been traumatic, although he didn't know in so much detail what had exactly happened. He was still at odds with what Misaki had told him at the hospital. His mind was simply unable to process the tall tale. It couldn't be true after all. Things like that just don't happen to real people. They just don't. And Misaki had always been known to overreact and exaggerate the smallest things. That must be it. Misaki was just overreacting.
But maybe some figure Misaki recognized had appeared and that was the cause of the wild-eyed, terrified look. At that moment though, there wasn't anybody suspicious-looking behind him. Just a class of grade-schoolers, a few mothers with their children, and a clown passing out balloons. The man turned back to his brother and looked at him quizzically. Why was he looking like that? Or maybe he really had brought a girlfriend and he was just too shy to tell his brother. That would explain his silence. Silly Misaki, he thought. To think, the boy had actually told him he was in love with Usagi-san. Takahiro knew better than that, he scoffed inwardly, denying the confrontation that had happened a few months ago. Men didn't fall in love with other men. It just didn't happen. Especially with Usagi-san of all people. That man was notoriously difficult to get along with. It was a good thing Misaki had finally found himself a girl.
Slowly Misaki opened his mouth to answer his brother's greeting. But only ended up shutting it when he found his throat had closed too tight to allow him to speak. His brother only gave him a funny look before continuing.
"So Misaki, where is this girl? Do I finally get to meet her?" Takahiro paused, but Misaki didn't answer, so he continued. "You shouldn't feel shy Misaki; you can tell your Nii-chan the truth. I knew you weren't really in love with Usagi-san. It was probably just admiration or something like that. It's a common mistake. Nothing to feel embarrassed about." Smiling, Takahiro reached out to pat his brother's hair like he used to when they were younger, only to be stopped by a set of slender, pale fingers that had clamped themselves around his wrist. He shot a look at the owner, eyes wide in confusion.
"Don't touch him."
Akihiko was looking down at the spectacled man in stony silence, directing towards him a look that would make a tiger freeze in its tracks. A second or two passed before he was satisfied that the man was not going to attempt to once again touch his lover and the author released his strangulating grip. Laughing nervously, Takahiro drew his hand to his chest and began to massage his wrist anxiously. Akihiko's interest in the man had finished and all his attention was directed to his boyfriend.
"Misaki? Shhh, Misaki it's alright. I'm here now."
"Usagi-san…" Slowly the brunette seemed to relax in the elder's embrace. Eventually the soothing movement of Akihiko's fingers running through his hair quelled his shaking and his eye returned to its normal emerald hue. As if all the fight had left his slender body, he slumped down into the rickety metal chair. His hands though never relaxed from the tight fists that gripped the author's shirt. Akihiko continued kneeling in front of his lover, paying no mind to the spilled soda currently staining the knees of his expensive slacks.
"Misaki, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have left you alone. I should have known better. I'm so sor-"
"It's alright Usagi-san. I'm the one who made you go and then lost sight of you in the crowd. It's my fau-"
"No it's not your fault Misaki. I'm the one to blame. I won't leave you alone again. I promise."
"Thank you Usagi-san."
"Are you alright now?"
"Y-yeah, I guess."
Father and son watched in fascination at the interaction between the two males. Every gesture was in sync, every movement maximized to bring the greatest comfort to the other. The smallest shift in one body resulted in a corresponding shift in the opposite. For every action, there was an equal and opposite reaction. It was like watching two halves of the same person. Takahiro gulped. Was this really happening to his brother? He… he was in love with a man? He had to make sure. He opened his mouth, his throat suddenly feeling far too dry to ask the inevitable question, which he had dreaded with all his being, the answer to.
"S-so Misaki, I take it you haven't split up with Usagi-chan, then?" Misaki turned to him, a weary look in his emerald eye.
"No, Nii-chan, I haven't."
"A-and you're going to be together for a while then?" Misaki nodded.
"A very long while Nii-chan."
"Well…um…it was nice seeing you here, Misaki. I've got to go though. It's getting close to Mahiro's bedtime and…well…" The sky was indeed beginning to grow dark. Misaki didn't miss the odd look his brother was giving him before Takahiro looked away awkwardly. The teen sighed inwardly; he knew it must be difficult for his older brother to accept the delicate nature of this revelation.
"Goodbye, Nii-chan." Misaki said, sparing his brother any further need to break the awkward silence between them. Relief flooded Takahiro's face and bending down, Takahiro scooped the toddler up into his arms. With a quick nod, not even a goodbye, his eyes not quite meeting theirs, he turned and disappeared hurriedly into the crowd.
"Do you think he's starting to get it?"
"Yes Misaki, I dare say he is." The brunette buried his face into the base of the elder's neck and in response Akihiko's arms tightened around his lover's frame. Misaki felt a slight emptiness in his chest. He loved his brother, he was all the family he had and he hoped that one day Takahiro would accept him with all his heart. But it still looked like that day was still a long ways off.
Together, they sat in silence as the movement of the park around them faded into nothing more than a faint buzzing in the background. Gradually Misaki's breath began to fall into a relaxed shallow rhythm and Akihiko knew the teen was had fallen asleep. But he continued to hold him against his chest knowing that they could be there for a while and not caring to have it another way. It had been a big day for his beloved and if the boy wanted to sleep then he would be the last person on earth to stop him from doing so.
The larger man couldn't help but marvel once again at the way his body had ceased to feel complete without its smaller counterpart locked into his embrace. Without Misaki there life had become a great emptiness, nothing more than a bottomless abyss. But the return of his lover had brought with it sensations of warmth and softness. The feeling of gentle childlike hands making their way down his arms and the peculiar mix of scent, both the sweet scent of vanilla like that of a freshly baked cake and the damp scent of earth after a fresh spring rain. Together they flooded his senses in a unique and tantalizing way reminding him of the picnics the two used to go one in the park.
With Misaki also came the sight of lush green and a chocolate brown, like the bark of a young sapling. Akihiko smiled at the analogy. Misaki was exactly like a young tree, infinitely tender, able to break at the slightest impact, but inside he concealed an overwhelming strength, a strength which gave him the ability to grab on with his roots and bend without breaking, only to bounce back upright once the metaphorical storm had passed. And every tree deserved a guardian so thus Akihiko would be Misaki's. He would be the one that stuck around to keep away every predator and weed that dared encroach on his territory. He would be there as the young sapling grew into a tall strong tree with a thick sturdy trunk and wide branches.
Eventually the crowd began to thin and the lights on all the rides flickered to life, illuminating the area in a warm colorful glow. Misaki's eyelid fluttered as he began to come to the end of his journey through the realm of dreams. Slowly he lifted his head from the confines of Akihiko's neck. Groggily he looked up to see the lavender eyes looking down at him with bottomless patience.
"Is it time to go home now?"
"Nope, we still have one more thing to do." The brunette only looked at him quizzically before he found himself being hoisted up into a standing position and pulled toward the tallest light display of them all.
"The Ferris wheel?"
"Yes, I like the Ferris wheel." Akihiko shot the smaller man a knowing smirk and instantly Misaki looked away blushing. He immediately turned back though. He didn't like having his lover out of his sight for too long.
The walk towards the giant structure was slow and leisurely. The world seemed to glow around them, every light seeming to be a tiny star or perhaps the twinkling of a petite fairy. They seemed to be winking at Misaki as he looked at them from under the arm Akihiko had wrapped around his shoulders. It may be the beginning of spring, but the nights were still cold and Misaki welcomed the added warmth currently flooding his body.
The lights were like a cloud of fireflies swarming around the couple and looking up at the lights, Misaki could almost imagine a smile behind every glimmer and flash of gentle radiance. To his surprise he found himself smiling back, his cheeks stretching farther than they had been stretched in months. Even when Akihiko had given the man in front of the Ferris wheel their tickets and the stranger had shot Misaki a suspicious glare at the sight of his patched eye, he had not dropped his smile.
He too felt like he too was glowing inside. Like he was a hot air balloon, made weightless and free by the fire that burned within him. The overwhelming sensation of a great load being suddenly knocked off his shoulder made him straighten his back and relax his perpetually hunched shoulders, allowing him to do anything he wished. He looked across the aisle that separated the two seats and showed the man sitting there his smile, knowing that his face would clearly tell his beloved the magnitude of the joy that was swelling within his soul.
A small gasp escaped the author and before Misaki knew what was happening he was being pounced on by a man who possessed the grace of a snow leopard and the beauty of an archangel.
Lips moved at a furious pace as heavy panting filled the small glass box. Together, the two men engaged their tongues in a fiery dance, sucking, biting, and rubbing against each other in a frenzy neither of them was aware they possessed. Nothing could have predicted the fire that had ignited at their touch. Heat began to grow between them until it consumed their consciousness and all awareness of their surroundings was lost.
Akihiko's hands were on his chest, finding their way beneath his shirt, over the concave of his stomach and up towards his nipples, already erect in anticipation of the man's expert touch. Misaki's back arched as a desperate moan escaped his lips. He wanted this. He wanted this so bad. He could not remember the last time a singular touch had felt so good.
Without realizing what he was doing, he hooked both legs around Akihiko's back and lifted his hips up, rubbing against the bulge that was his lover's need. Gasps escaped their mouths as their lips separated and Akihiko looked deep into the eyes of his beloved.
"Misaki…do…you want this?"
"Yes." The sound was more a cross between a moan and a whimper than anything else, and Akihiko was finding it incredibly difficult to continue his trail of thought.
"We can't do it here. Not on the Ferris wheel." Misaki looked at him in utter disbelief. Usually, it was the smaller man's job to say where they could and could not do it. Akihiko took one look at Misaki's bewildered look and he was at the younger man's neck, sucking and biting his way down to his collarbone.
"I have," Akihiko's tongue darted out to taste the other's glorious flesh, trailing it across porcelain white skin, sending delightful shivers down Misaki's spine, "a hotel room," This time it was a couple of nips to the tender skin at the base of his lover's jaw. He was finding it harder and harder to pause so that he might finish his sentence, "nearby." There he had done it. Now Misaki was his to devour.
Or so it should have been if a park employee, who was looking disgusted at what he saw as he tapped on the plastic window, hadn't so rudely interrupted them. A growl rose from the violet-eyed predator at the untimed interruption as he crouched over the panting figure of his blushing lover. Without hesitation he scooped up his uke and stepped out from the ride, ignoring the rude stares, his steps hurried as he made his way to the car. There was a strain in his pants and he urgently needed to relieve the pressure.
Placing Misaki down in the car seat was almost as physically painful. Every fiber of his being was telling him to hold on to the teen, to press himself against the petite body, and revive the fire that had ignited between them. A green eye, clouded with unmistakable lust, was looking at him, pleading for him to relieve his burning need. Akihiko couldn't stop himself from leaning forward and capturing the boy's sweet lips. The passion was back and they were moving against each other again but Akihiko didn't want it to happen in an old parking lot. Their relationship wasn't like that. Misaki deserved more than to be shagged in some parking lot. So reluctantly he pulled away, producing another whine from his beloved.
"The hotel Misaki. We have to…" His words trailed of. He couldn't remember the rest of his sentence when Misaki was reaching out to him, his cheeks flushed and he glossy kiss-swollen lips parted at the loss they were experiencing. The beautiful sight was too much for his mind.
"No Misaki, you're going to enjoy this."
"Soon Misaki, soon." Quickly he closed the door and practically ran to the other side. His movements were shaky and he had to try several times before he finally managed to put the key in the ignition. His hands were quivering with suppressed need and his knuckles were white on the steering wheel he was gripping. All energy was being directed at getting to the hotel before he finally cracked and took Misaki right there on the side of the road.
It was a wonder he didn't get pulled over for speeding as they raced towards the hotel. The receptionist gave them a funny look but they were too preoccupied with getting towards the elevator. A kind gentleman, his back bent with age, held the door for them as they entered the metal box. Misaki's blush only increased tenfold when the man gave him a knowing wink before the doors slid close, hiding him from view.
They were on each other before the elevator had even started moving. Akihiko had Misaki against the wall and was attacking his lips with a passion he had kept suppressed for far too long. The sounds coming from his lover only urged him on, making him move faster and harder. And Misaki was meeting his craving with an appetite of equal proportions.
A small ping warned them of the opening of the doors, and together they spilled out into the hallway, entangled in each other's limbs. Misaki's legs were once again hooked around his waist and his slender arms wrapped around the larger man's neck. One of Akihiko's hands was gripping the firmness of Misaki's ass as his other fumbled in his pocket for the key to their room. He could see the door before them and he carried Misaki towards it hurriedly. He had to place the uke back on his feet before he made to open the door.
"Usagi-san, what…?" Misaki was looking at him with desire shining plainly from behind his unnaturally bright eye.
"Close your eye Misaki. I want this to be a surprise." A slightly exasperated look was all he got before the teen's lid closed, concealing his longing from the older man. Akihiko bent down and kissed the naked lid before swinging the door to the suite open. Slowly he guided Misaki to the center of the room, swinging the door shut behind them. Finally, looking around and seeing that everything was in place he opened his mouth to speak.
"You can open your eye now Misaki." Slowly the lid drew back and Misaki looked around him in wonder. On every surface, from the intricately carved dresser, to the mahogany table, to the ornate headboard of the bed, even spilling onto the floor, were hundreds of glowing red candles that seemed to be floating in a sea of velvety crimson rose petals. The air was heavy with their intoxicating scent and like the lights at the amusement park the flickering star-like flames of the candles filled the room with warmth unlike anything else. It was as if they had accidentally wandered into a secret fairy grotto.
But despite it all the sight of red made Misaki flinch into Akihiko's side.
"Misaki, it's alright."
"But the red…everything is red…"
"Exactly Misaki. We have to cure you of this fear." Misaki wasn't listening though; his eye was wide and unseeing, as images and memories of the blood-soaked walls from the office filled his mind. He could see them again, their bodies littering the floor, the image as clear as if he were still in the room and the massacre of the office's former occupants having just ended. His ears roared with the pounding of blood and the vestiges of their dying screams. His nostrils flared as they took in the scent of hot metal and ignited gunpowder.
"Usagi-san…" His voice was wavering, uncertain, his breathing coming in short gasps, but not like in elevator. No, the cause of his heart speeding up was not the touch of his lover but the rising panic that threatened to rip out of his throat in a banshee's shriek of terror.
The arms were back around him now, as he was being pulled to Akihiko's broad chest. He could feel the man's calm breath blowing warmly against his ear and with each stroke to his tousled chocolate hair and each loving word being whispered into the petite shell of his ear he began to calm. Eventually his breathing slowed and his heart ceased its frantic palpitation. His shaking stilled and he relaxed into the firm chest of his lover.
"There, it's not so bad now, is it?"
"N-no, I like it. It's-"
"You're so cheesy."
"Shall I give you a taste so you can find out just how cheesy I am?" There was silence and then…
"…yes." Akihiko grinned down at his lover who was currently engaged in hiding his fierce blush beneath the author's arm.
"Come to bed, Misaki." Slowly they both stood and taking Misaki's hands he led him towards the creamy white of the sheets currently speckling with the ruby like petals.
Moans and gasps filled the room punctuated by unrestrained cries of passion and declarations of love. The green polo Misaki had been wearing was soon left discarder on the floor as the owner's body writhed beneath Akihito's ministrations. Long slender fingers danced over the smaller chest and Misaki realized what was happening.
"All these scars…" The teen turned his head away, averting his eye so that it was staring fixedly at the bed sheets. Akihiko was silent for a moment his fingers tracing the knotted and raised patched of skin that decorated Misaki's chest. They were everywhere, overlapping each other as they curved and twisted a morbid painting across the ivory skin.
"I'm sorry, I know there ugly." A large hand entered Misaki's line of sight and he tensed as it drew close to cup his cheek, as if he expected to be punished for the blemishes to his formerly flawless skin. Slowly the hand applied pressure, forcing him to turn his head and looked at his lover's troubled face. The image wavered as tears bricked the corners of his eyes.
"You're perfect." And before he could respond, their lips were once again connected as the larger man molder himself against his younger lover. The kiss didn't last long though because in no time the lips were moving, traveling from one eye to the other licking up tears before migrating down the teens slender swanlike neck, kissing and tasting every scar as it went. The tears hadn't stopped now, and Misaki threw his arms around his boyfriend's shoulders, tangling his fingers into the starlight silver hairs. They were tears of joy though and the older man smiled as he took the pink bud of Misaki's nipple into his mouth, grazing it with his teeth and circling it with his tongue, until the teen was once against arching his back and groaning beneath him.
Even with the authors hand doing similar actions to his other nipple it still wasn't enough. He craved more and if he didn't get it fast he wasn't going to be held responsible for his actions. The rabbit must be a mind reader for no sooner had he thought that when suddenly cold fingers were running down his sides making his muscles twitch and tighten at the almost forgotten contact. It had been so long that Misaki felt he could lose it right now with his jeans still on.
"Usagisan…" His voice was a breathless whine, but it was all he could articulate at the moment, his mind losing itself in a haze of lust and need.
"Oh Misaki, my sweet angel Misaki." The movement of Akihiko's lips against his stomach was driving him wild.
"…Usagisan." His voice was demanding now, holding in it a warning, telling the other to move faster. Akihiko growled in response at the back of his throat before swiftly ridding the uke of the confines of his pants in one swift movement. There was still the cloth of Misaki's boxers in the way though, and Misaki's had had enough. Plus Akihiko still was practically fully dressed.
If the horrible experience had taught the teen anything, it was how to rid a man of his pant in less than a second. In a flash Misaki was on top, his lips working against Akihiko's in a fierce dance while his nimble fingers made quick work of the other's button before moving swiftly onto his zipper. He was surprised he could do it. He was shaking now from the need to feel the other fill him up and logically he should already have passed out from the lack of blood currently flowing to his brain.
In no time the zipper was down though and the silver haired man was kicking of the fabric from around his ankles as he groaned in pleasure at finally being set free. Amethyst met emerald and once again Misaki had to hold himself back from coming right there at the sight of the predatory look in the other's eyes.
"Your shirt…I want…" No quicker had he said then Akihiko was moving his hand swiftly down the rows of buttons revealing creamy expanses of his firm chest as he went. He blinked in surprise when Misaki was suddenly on him, hands exploring and fingers tasting as the expensive silk fell away.
"Misaki." His eyes were almost rolling back in his head at the touch of the small hands sliding down his abdomen towards the core of his heat. "Misaki…I can't…" Strong hands shot out to grasp the others slender wrist bringing them too his face. He paused to kiss both palms before once again looking the other in the face, his ever present smirk softening when he saw the slight hurt and insecurity behind the other's single green eye.
"If you do that, I won't be able to control myself." The hurt disappeared just like that and before he knew it Misaki was returning to him his signature smirk.
"Is that why it's taking you so long? And here I thought you were just getting old." Another growl escaped the back of Akihiko's throat and once again he had Misaki sprawled out beneath him on the bed, his slender frame flushed and eager for the seme's next move. Akihiko leaned down until his breath was tickling the shell of the teen's ear.
"You'll be taking that back."
"Oh yeah?" Misaki's wrists had broken free from the larger man's grasp and were once again trailing their way down the other's sides, finding their way to the waist band of the man's underwear.
That was all it took before both sets of boxers found their way across the room to join the rest of the rumpled cloths and Akihiko was feeling his way up the teens thighs sending trail of fire through the smaller one's body. Misaki couldn't take it anymore and was arching up against his seme as the older man brought himself closer. The result was an explosion of heat as their groins made contact, forcing them to both cry out in shock and pleasure. Still it seemed Akihiko was taking a long time to find the younger's entrance and Misaki was growing impatience as the ache to be filled grew increasingly stronger. But still Usagi seemed to hesitate.
"Usagisan, why aren't you…" all semblance of tolerance finally flew out the window and Misaki forcefully grabbed the others wrist and brought it to his entrance. His jaw fell open and he cried out as the cool fingers made contact with the tight ring of muscles circling his hole.
"Misaki, are you-"
"Fuck me! Just fuck me already."
"As you wish." From some magical spot beneath the sheets Akihito produced a bottle of lube and after spreading it liberally over his fingers he once again brought them to the center of Misaki's ache. The teen cried out again, this time louder as they pushed in, stretching him for the first time in months.
"Misaki, are you alright."
"Hurry! Just hurry!" There was no more hesitation as Akihiko began to both prepare Misaki with one hand while cover himself in lube with the other. A whimper escaped the teen at the loss of the digits only to be replaced with a gasp as a much larger, much firmer appendage took their place. Slowly Akihiko pushed in, stopping half way when he saw the other's face screw up in pain. After a second though Misaki was nodding and he continued until finally he was filling his lover to the sheath where then he stopped, waiting for permission to continue. It came in no time in the form of Misaki's small fingers digging themselves into his back. He began to thrust. And Misaki screamed.
"Misaki!" Pleasure coursed through their bodies like waves of electricity making them lose their thoughts in a sea of heat and passion. At first the thrust were clumsy and irregular, it had been more than a year after all, but in less than a minute the knowledge returned causing Akihiko to thrust harder and faster until Misaki's hips were coming up to meet his lover's thrust for thrust. It was not enough though and Misaki's hand left his lover's shoulder so that he might grasp his member, pumping in time as each of Akihiko's thrust sent the teen harder against the mattress. Seeing this Akihito growled and replaced the uke's hand with his own.
Misaki's cries were increasing in volume now, his breathing coming faster, and the finger's he was digging into Akihiko's back pressing harder until the man was sure he would be cleaning up the tiny trails of blood in the morning. But at the moment he could feel it. Misaki was approaching the edge. Like two crystal whose vibrations were growing higher and higher in frequency, they didn't have much longer until it became too much and they shattered.
The walls around Akihiko suddenly clamped down causing him to come with Misaki, his deep roar joining the uke's scream of pleasure before he collapse, maneuvering himself so that he didn't crush Misaki in his post cordial haze.
Together they lay in near silence, two hearts racing, two sets of lungs panting, and two pairs of hands reaching until they had found there partners. Ivory met porcelain as the digits intertwined and gingerly Misaki lifted himself off the bed, only to settle back down on his lover's chest. Still no words were spoken as Akihiko helped the boy arrange himself into a more comfortable position so that in no time Misaki had his face buried into the familiar spot he had made of the area between Akihiko's neck and shoulder. A stray petal had invaded his special place and soft Misaki blew it away, effectively reclaiming his territory.
Lying, spread out across Akihiko's firm chest, legs tangled together and chocolate mixing with star dust as their hair spilled across the creamy sheets, he realized how foolish he had been. For so long he had been terrified that joining with his boyfriend in such a way would only result in more of those terrifying flashbacks, but he had been wrong. So incredibly, wonderfully wrong. Sex, no, making love with his Usagisan was nothing like that. Never had he felt a grip as firm and yet as gentle as Akihiko's and he knew that if he searched all the word he would never find another which fit against his so very rightly.
"Was that ok?" Misaki chuckled at the obvious question.
"Yeah, it was ok." Beneath him the larger man seemed to droop at the mediocre review. Misaki continued though, a playful note adding itself to his voice. "It was so ok that I think I have just had my mind blown, and now I want to do it again…and again, and again!" Misaki had propped himself up with his arms folded in front of him as he looked down at his rabbit. Akihiko knew he had taught the younger well when he saw the smirk spread across Misaki's delectably swollen lips.
"Can't argue with that now can I?"
"You'd better hope you can't."
Three o'clock A.M. found Misaki curled up in the arms of his rabbit, gentle breaths stirring the sweat soaked silver hairs. Leisurely, slender fingers traced aimless patterns over the narrow back of the unconscious teen. A soft murmur escaped from between Misaki's reddened lips and slowly dark lashes fluttered open, revealing a sleep-blurred eye, which gazed at the author in a disoriented manner. Akihiko returned the look with one that contained in it an infinite quantity of tenderness and love.
"How are you feeling?" The question produced a wide smile from the brunette, causing Akihiko's breath to hitch in his chest at the beauty the image in front of him had created.
"As in, you know, there's nothing wrong. Now, at this moment, nothing can be more right," A deep chuckle rumbled through the elder's chest and Misaki snuggled closer.
"Should we take a bath?"
"I don't want to move."
"Nope, I think we should take a bath."
"Come on. You'll enjoy it."
"I'm enjoying myself right now."
"Well you'll enjoy it more." And with those words Akihiko sat up earning him a quick yelp from Misaki as the blankets fell away and allowed the cool air to rush in. He didn't have long to ponder this because before he knew what was happening he was being scooped up bridal style into Akihiko's arms and being carried off towards an ornate door he assumed led to the bathroom. He threw his arms around his rabbit's neck as Akihiko reached for the door and Misaki's already big eye widened further as he took in the grandiose luxury that was spread out before him.
In the center of the room rested an elegant marble bathtub, so big they could use it as a kid's pool at an elementary. Wisps of steam danced from the surface of the bottle green tinted water upon which floated hundreds more of the scarlet petals. The walls were lined with mirrors gilded with golden swirls and rosettes. From every angle, Misaki could see the painted glass reflecting back his astonished expression. A faint rustling rose up around Akihiko as he made his way towards the giant tub, his feet padding over even more of the scattered roses. The teen's emerald eye was riveted though on the golden fixtures protruding from the side of the water.
"Usagi-san, is that a…" His voice died off as he stared in reverence at the two golden statues.
"Yes it is."
"Lions…" Together they gazed at the shining lion faucets. Suddenly Misaki's head whipped around and before Akihiko knew what was happening, Misaki was pressing his lips hard against the author's. He drew back after a minute, his lips formed into a wide smile and his eye bright with joy.
"I love you Usagisan." Misaki whispered, a blush creeping up on his skin at his sudden declaration. Akihiko returned the smile, the corners of his eyes crinkling in a way that took Misaki's breath away.
"I love you too Misaki," Akihiko replied, his voice husky but his lavender eyes were twinkling with playfulness. Misaki drew back a little, he knew that look... andbefore any thoughts could formed themselves completely in his head, Akihiko was lifting him up and with a great splash; followed by a torrent of yelps and laughter a few seconds later; he dropped his boyfriend into the huge tub, their smiles' reflections in the mirrors rippling as a great wave travelled over the edges of the tub and splattered across their rose petal-covered surfaces.
Once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.