AN: What happens when I go off on a tangent.
Maybe I'll draw a cover for this at some point but I'm sick and tired right now, so later.
EDIT: changed the rating to T because I forgot about the swearing I put near the end. Oops /:
MORE EDIT: I can't believe I've gotten so many reviews about this but this story is a one-shot. Meaning there will be no more chapters. As in, that's it, it ends. This isn't part of a series or anything, it was just something I wrote out of the air. But I'm glad you all love it, if you want more :3 It makes me happy.
Contrary to popular belief, Heiji was not oblivious to Kazuha's feelings. She was so obvious, how could he call himself a detective he couldn't see it? He even felt the same way.
But he was a detective. It was a dangerous job. And stuff could happen to him.
If he was any closer to Kazuha, it would hurt her too much, if something happened to him. He couldn't encourage her feelings anymore because the last thing he wanted was to hurt her.
So he played dumb. Heiji was a good actor. He never let anyone know about it. Sometimes he thought he lay the act on too thick, but they always fell for it. It was quite insulting, when they believed he was that dense, but it was all for Kazuha...
Sometimes, he almost couldn't stand it and he needed to tell her. Those were the times when he went to see Shinichi, as Conan, and Ran. Seeing them reminded what could happen to him and how hurt Kazuha would feel.
He couldn't let do that to her, not like Shinichi did to Ran. He didn't blame him, but Heiji did not want to take that chance.
He almost let it slip, several times. He always recovered, though, even though it disappointed her. He was choosing the lesser of two evils.
Once she had mustered up the courage to confess. He bolted, before she could say it and went to tease Shinichi and to remind himself exactly why he couldn't.
He didn't know how much more he could take. It was going to come someday.
But that someday was not today. Or the next. Or the next.
One day he couldn't take it. He was going to take the next oppourtunity to tell her. He picked up the phone and before she even picked up, he realized that this was not something one could say over the phone. He was about to hang up when she picked up.
"I-I have something to talk to you about," he said.
"So do I," she said, quietly. She suggested going to eat at a ramen shop. It wasn't a particularly romantic place to confess his undying love for her, but he agreed nevertheless.
She looked a little nervous when he arrived (late), and after ordering, they sat in an awkward silence for a while.
"Um," they said at the same time.
"You go first," he said.
"No no, you can go," she said, blushing. He frowned.
"I'M LETTING YOU TALK FIRST, AHO. JUST GO."
She smiled a bit, but quickly became serious again. "Y-you know Kiriha-san from school?"
This was not how he had expected it to go. He had expected her to confess and he would reciprocate her feelings and they would be the happy couple they were always meant to be.
But he nodded, feeling like something was lodged in his throat.
"He," she looked away. "He asked me to go out with him."
Their ramen arrived and Kazuha took her chopsticks and nervously fiddled with it.
"What did you say?" he managed to say, ignoring the alluring scent of his ramen.
She poked at her noodles. "I told him I'd think about it."
His mouth went dry and he took a bite of his noodles. On one hand, she hadn't said yes yet and there was still hope for him. On the other 'she'd think about it'? Why would she have to do that? Didn't she like him?
"What are you going to say to him?" Heiji asked, after swallowing his noodles.
She had taken a bite of noodles as well, and he had to wait until she was finished. His palms sweated as the seconds ticked by like hours.
"I think I'm going to say yes," she said.
He thought he was falling and gripped the table to stop himself only to realize he wasn't. He didn't let go, not trusting himself to not actually do so. He nodded, being rendered unable to talk.
"Kiriha-san is really nice," she continued. "But I want your opinion before I say anything."
Within seconds, his mind turned into detective mode and he analyzed Kiriha's personality. To his dismay, he couldn't find any fault in him. The only way he could properly stop her was to confess. He drew a deep breath.
"Kazuha, I-" all of a sudden, he thought he heard an eerily familiar child's voice, and he turned around, expecting to see Shinichi, in all his small child glory. It turned out to be some kid with his father, but it was enough to remind him why he couldn't say anything.
He turned back to her and he saw her waiting for his answer, hope sparkling in those beautiful eyes he had always loved. "I-I think Amano-kun is a nice guy. If you want, I guess..." he saw the moment when he had crushed her hope and his heart felt it was being crushed as well.
"Oh," she said, turning away. That single syllable held so much disappointment that Heiji just wanted to take it all back. "I'll tell him tomorrow at school." He nodded, not trusting himself to speak. "Were you going to say something?"
"Well," he said, forcing a smile on his face. "Conan and Neechan might be coming over and they need to discuss living arrangements with us."
"Ah," she said, poking at her noodles again. "I see."
"What's wrong?" Heiji put his hand on her shoulder and squeezed, trying to apologize to her through the simple act and begging her to understand. "You're usually more excited."
Apparently Kazuha didn't seem to understand his actions and stood up, slapping some money down.
"I think I'm going to go home now," she whispered, shakily. He knew she was going to cry soon and he wanted to scoop her up into his arms and apologize for everything. But he couldn't and she walked away, leaving behind a full bowl of ramen.
One of the cooks watched her leave and turned to Heiji. "She was really hoping you'd stop her," she said. Heiji just looked at her with sad eyes and quietly paid for his meal, also leaving behind an unfinished bowl of ramen.
A month later, after school, Heiji was packing up his things and two rows in front of him, Kazuha was doing the same thing. He had rarely spoken to her ever since she was dating Kiriha. It was the one of the longest stretches of time when he hadn't been with her almost every second possible. As he put his final notebook in his bag he thought about asking her to eat something with him- not a ramen shop, though. The memory was still a little more fresh than he would like.
As he walked towards her, he saw Kiriha also approach her. He slipped his hand into hers and muttered something in her ear. Heiji heard them both laugh, and he turned and walked out of the classroom.
He walked in a daze and before long he found himself on the school roof. He threw his bag down and it bounced a bit as he kicked the school wall.
"DAMMIT," he yelled. He felt a breeze and it felt more prominent on his cheek, making it chillier than it should be. He touched his cheek and his hand came out wet.
He snorted. He was crying. Fuck it he was actually crying. He sunk down, back against the wall. He gave a watery chuckle, shaking his head at the absurdity of it.
This was better, better for Kazuha. It was all for her and now she wouldn't be hurt.