A/N: Uh, there's a good explanation as to why I haven't been continuing "Music is Life" and started a new fic instead... My muse has been failing me lately, but I suddenly thought of a plot like this while I was zoning out one day. And since I rarely write out stories in first person, I felt like this would be a good opportunity to improve on my skills~ This story will be a two-shot, so I hope you will enjoy it. :)
Disclaimer: Ugh, this is my least favorite part to write out... Naruto does not belong to me. Crying.
Warning: Full on yaoi this time~ tralalalala~
This story is dedicated to nach-ee3. Again, happy belated birthday! :)
My name is Uzumaki Naruto and I have been dating the "almighty and divine, stick up his asshole forever" Uchiha Sasuke ever since sixth grade. I know that's absolutely impossible to believe, but believe me, it's true. I'm not like those other pieces of tree sap that would spout random crap out of nowhere and be lying about it at the same time. I'm Uzumaki Naruto, damn it! I spew out unexpected ("unnecessary" in that teme's case – I swear, I will eventually break up with him) nonsense all the time, but I'm effing truthful about it. That goes for everything else I say as well.
I bet you're all wondering how or why- or how and why I ended up dating some prick like him. Some people – fine, everyone may not know it, but I'm too good for Uchiha Sasuke. Yeah, that's right. I said it. Uzumaki Naruto is way too good for that bastard, Uchiha Sasuke. I don't even remember how that teme managed to snag someone as awesome as me.
…Okay, that was a lie. I promise you all that that was my first and last false statement coming out of me. Well, only the first half of that sentence was a lie. I do remember how and why we got together, but the last half was definitely true. I am eternally awesome. Period.
Anyways, back to the real topic. Just don't be surprised or laugh because I have a feeling that most of you are going to laugh at this. Here it goes.
You see, my mom and his mom were inseparable during the time of their youth and got our dads to befriend each other as well. They used to double-date all the time while they were in high school and both couples ended up marrying their significant other respectively. After our parents gave birth to us, their friendship tightened even more, so Sasuke and I were forced to bond as well. Basically because of that, Sasuke and I have been best friends since I was born (unfortunately, the teme is older than me by like three months. He teases me for that a lot...).
Now that we're through with the beginning of how it all started, I shall move onto the whole couple thing. During elementary school, all the kids knew about the idea of being in an intimate relationship, but felt like they were too young to experience being in one themselves.
Elementary school was the worst. The whole female population went gaga over Sasuke - including my one and only love at that time, Haruno Sakura. They constantly asked the bastard if they can walk home with him or gave him shit like disgusting candy and overrated toys. Fine, I got to admit that the candy he always gave me (he's an idiot who hates sweets) was good and playing with some of the coolest action figures was fun, but still! Even though he kept rejecting those girls, they managed to get him to take stuff home with him every friggen time. Don't ask me how because I seriously don't know. Girls are like the epitome of ninjas or something.
I never really cared about the amount of fans he had (he still has many of those till today), but what really ticked me off was that no matter how many times I confessed and gave mud pies, dolls, flowers, and Hershey kisses to the pink haired girl, she never noticed me. She has considered me as a close friend and all, but what I meant is that she never noticed me in a romantic sense. She is forever devoted to Sasuke and it's ridiculous! In spite of the fact that entirely everyone knows about my relationship with Sasuke now- excluding our parents, of course- she is still in love with him – along with his other fans.
At the present, I guess you can say that I'm pissed at Sasuke for other reasons - like the fact that he still gets presents from his fan club instead of just from me. He's my fucking boyfriend. He's not supposed to accept anything from anybody else but me! And let me make this clear. I do not and will never like Sasuke. We're not going out because we like each other, it just happened.
Sorry, got off topic again. Anyways, once we got out of elementary and went into middle school, girls started to have the guts to ask him out. Of course, I took this chance to ask Sakura out countless times after she kept getting turned down by Sasuke, but I got rejected numerous times in return. At the end of the first semester and in the beginning of the second, Sakura finally gave up on pursuing Sasuke and I gave up on asking her out after a few more weeks of trying. That was also when Sasuke began to get sick of having girls stick to him 24/7. Well, he never did admit to that, but as his one and only friend and best friend, it was easy for me to tell that he was. Although the prick may be an emotionless man of a few words, I knew everything he thought and felt, and vice versa for him. Like I said, we were forced to be together way too often.
It all started while we were walking home from school one day. We somehow got into a conversation about how I was tired of not getting Sakura to realize how impressive I can be if I were to become her boyfriend and that Sasuke seemed to be getting more emo by the day. As a highly clever buddy, I suggested for him to try dating anyone of his fans so that the rest can back off. In that usual, disgustingly smooth and deep voice of his, he responded in the negative and said it'd be more annoying to have to focus his attention on one girl constantly and that I was an idiot. ...Why did I have to repeat that last part, ugh!
So with my superb prowess and intelligence, I was the one who came up with the plan for us to try dating one another. Quite enthusiastically, I told him that if we were to begin going out with each other, then the fangirls would most likely give up on him and my mind would revert away from Sakura for a while. Win-win situation, I'm a genius. And then obviously, Sasuke had to be the one to rain on my parade by saying that rumors of us being homosexuals would spread around all of Konoha. With my pride on the line (Sasuke and I are both stubborn about this whole pride thing), I concluded that I didn't care what others thought and promoted our relationship into an intimate one.
Since Sasuke stayed silent after that declaration, I assumed that he didn't really mind or simply didn't give a crap about the idea. So, we officially became a couple that day and are still together until now - with both of us almost at the end of our senior year in high school. It makes me wonder how we managed to stick together for this long without having one of us killed. To be frank, I never thought it'd work out, but it did and it's still going pretty strong. Strangely, we haven't fallen for one another as of yet though. Or we just never came to say that we did… And I seriously haven't! I will never fall in love with him, end of story.
I know what you all are thinking – that this story isn't romantic at all and that you guys were expecting something like hot gay sex. Just because we are two insanely attractive men does not mean that we screw each other all the time, you perverts. ...It's just that we don't do it all the time. Hey, as males, it's quite damn obvious that we would've done stuff by now.
And that "stuff" will forever and I say forever will be confidential.
A/N: I will try to get the next/last part in by next week. So, is this interesting enough to continue? Please review. :)