This is my HomeStuck fanfic, enjoy! (I hope...)
twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [GC]
TA: hey KK
CG: HI SOL
TA: hii KK!
CG: SO WHAT SORT OF SHIT ARE YOU UP TO THIS TIME?
TA: ii ju2t wanted two talk wiith you
CG: OK, THEN TALK.
TA: ii 2ee how thii2 ii2
CG: OH. MY. FUCK. WE WENT THROUGH THIS.
TA: ii know iim 2orry
CG: WHAT DO YOU WANT?
CG: JUST TELL ME.
TA: you liike cookiie2 riight?
CG: FUCK YES!
TA: iim goiing two make 2ome for you
CG: REALLY REALLY?
CG: IS THIS A PRANK?
CG: IS THIS JOHN? ARE YOU PRETENDING TO BE SOLLUX TO GET MY HOPES UP?
TA: no ii really want two make cookiie2 and no iim not john
CG: CAN I HELP? NEED TO MAKE SURE YOU DON'T POISON THEM.
TA: but why would ii do that? iid only drug them.
CG: GREAT! I'M REALLY EXCITED TO COME OVER NOW.
TA: 2hut the fuck up KK
CG: OK. I'M COMING OVER NOW.
carcinoGeneticis [GC] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA]
Karkat logged off of his pesterchum, somewhat happy to be making cookies today. Fuck yes! I get to have cookies today! He thought to himself. But, ugh. Why did it have to be with Sollux? Out of all my friends…
He pushed his chair out and walked to the door of his room, might as well at least try to enjoy himself today.
Karkat ran out the door, wondering what way he would get to Sollux's house.
When Karkat finally got there, he rang the doorbell and waited politely outside, something very unusual for Karkat. Sollux came to the door, surprised to see Karkat waiting there like a sane person and not breaking his door down, for once.
"Um… Hey KK…"
"Want to come inthide?" Sollux opened his door, still confused at Karkat's strange behavior.
Karkat stepped inside, looking up at the red-and blue themed front room.
"Did you do something different to your hallway?" Karkat asked, attempting small talk between the two.
"Uh… No?" Sollux said, still confused at Karkat's sudden calmness.
"Oh. Really? It looks different!"
"Yeah. I didn't do anything to it…"
"Hm… Well let's go make some fucking awesome cookies!" Karkat yelled.
Sollux smiled as Karkat ran into his kitchen, yelling about how awesome their cookies were going to be. "Thlow down KK! You're going to break thomething!"
"No I'm not!" Karkat called back at him, already getting the ingredients down.
Oh I thee… KK jutht wantth more thugar… "KK, don't you have the thuff for cookieth at your houth?"
"No, I used it all up!" Karkat yelled, rummaging through his drawers.
"Again KK? Thith ith getting to be a habit with you."
"Shut up Sollux!" Karkat whined, pouring flour into a bowl.
"Do you want any help?" Sollux laughed as Karkat made the dough by himself.
"If you want to help then no one's stopping you!"
"Thut up KK!" Sollux laughed again, Karkat didn't even need a recipe anymore.
"Fuck!" Karkat snapped, glaring at the finished dough.
"What ith it thith time?"
"This cookie dough is too fucking good! I can't stop eating it!" He took another spoonful and shoveled into his mouth, tilting his head back and slowly chewing it.
"KK! Thtop eating that! You're going to get thalmonella!"
"No I'm not Sol! I've done this plenty of times before!"
"KK... Give. Me. The. Dough."
"No." Karkat grabbed another spoonful, licking the dough off.
"KK, give me the bowl!"
"Now!" Sollux raised his voice, holding his hand out.
Karkat looked up at Sollux's death glare, "Hell no!" He grabbed the bowl and ran out of the kitchen, eating another bite of it.
"Hey, get back here!" Sollux ran after him, "Don't you want cookieth?"
"No way! Cookie dough is so much better!" Karkat bolted up the stairs, narrowly avoiding Sollux's grab for him.
Sollux followed him up the stairs, "Dammit KK! Jutht come back here, don't make me chathe you!"
"Too late, it's like a game of tag now!"
"God, you are thuch a child!" Sollux sighed.
"At least I'm not a fuckass, fucka-arrg!" Karkat groaned, he was lying on the floor with Sollux on top of him.
"Ha! Take that you nubthlurping fuckpod!" Sollux grabbed the bowl out of Karkat's hands and slid it farther down the hallway, away from the other boy.
"Fuck you Sollux!" Karkat yelled, reaching out for the dough.
Sollux moved so that he was sitting on top of Karkat, using his hands to pin down his wrists.
"Ung!" Karkat groaned, "Get off of me fuckass!"
"No way! We are baking thothe! You are going to thtop eating them and deal with it!"
"But I want them!"
"They're not even cookieth!"
"You're not God! You don't control what they are!" Karkat shoved Sollux off of him and scrambled up, grabbing the cookie dough as he did, "They can be whatever the fuck they want to be!"
"KK! Get back here!" Sollux jumped up after him.
They both ran through the house until Sollux couldn't find him. Damn him. Sollux thought, where could he be?
Sollux went back downstairs, a bit flustered and out of breath from his chase. He quietly made his way into the kitchen, jumping a bit when he saw Karkat.
"Arg! Don't scare me like that, fuckass!" Karkat yelled, accidentally flinging the ball of cookie dough he had across the room.
"What are you doing KK?" Sollux asked him, looking at the sheet of dough balls.
"What do you think shithead? I'm making cookies!"
"Y-you are?" Sollux stuttered, wondering if all the running around had made him hallucinate.
"Yeah, you wanted cookies, didn't you? And since I'm fucking tired from running around I thought that I'd put them in the oven."
"Oh… Well thankth KK, but I didn't mind that you jutht wanted the dough…"
"Well then why the fuck were you flipping out so bad earlier?!" Karkat snarled, slamming the cookies into the oven.
"I jutht didn't want you to get thalmonella…"
Karkat's eyes widened, "Oh." He sheepishly looked down at the floor, "Uh… Thanks for the concern I guess…"
"Geethe KK! You're thtarting to thound like Tavroth!"
"Shut the fuck up! No I'm not!" Karkat took a spoon from the counter and pretended to throw it at Sollux.
"Yeth, becauthe a wooden thpoon would hurt me." Sollux replied sarcastically, "How much longer are they going to be in there for?"
"I don't know, look at the timer, stupid!"
"Hm… Another eight minuteth…"
"Hey, after you're done making thethe, want to watch a movie?" Sollux took another glance at the timer, still seven minutes to go.
"Sure, what sort of shitty movies do you have here?"
"Hm… Mothtly horror and thtuff like that."
"Horror? Don't you have any other genres of movies?" Karkat's eyes widened, he gulped at the thought of having to watch a horror.
"Not really, and I don't have any romantic comedieth if that'th what you were looking for." Sollux teased.
"Pfft." Karkat scoffed, "I'm not afraid of a shitty horror movie!"
"Then watch one with me."
"Why the fuck should I satisfy your strange urges to watch a movie with me? I'm not stupid, I know what you're up to!" Karkat's voice got louder with each word, until he was finally yelling at Sollux.
"What am I up to then KK?" Sollux purred, pretending to be seductive, "Tell me what I'm plotting…"
"Fuck no! Stop that Sollux, you're creeping me out!"
"Tho you can't even handle a little creeping? You're a thcaredy cat!" Sollux teased, "Tho thcared you can't even watch a cheethy movie with your betht bro!"
"Shut the fuck up Sollux! I am not scared!" Karkat screeched at him.
"Ooh, and I tho am! Oh no! Thtop yelling KK! You're thcaring me!" Sollux mocked, laughing hard.
"Stop laughing! I am not fucking scared! Why don't you pick out a fucking movie then?"
Sollux wiped his eyes, wet from laughing so hard, "Fine, I will." Sollux giggled, retreating the room to find a scary movie.
Beep, beep, beep! The timer went off; Karkat grabbed an oven mitt and, grumbling, took the cookies out of the oven.