The sun is just peaking over the horizon as we make our way back to the lobby to get the lifts, Cat will have to stay on the first floor tonight, and I on the twelfth, though I can't bring myself to leave her, not now, not again.
I feel that maybe Cat and I may get some time to talk to each other but she is whisked away from me by Euphemia. "Why can't I talk to her?" I ask Erwin, as he comes to stand next to me. He sighs, and rubs the bald patch on his head sleepily.
"You will have plenty of time to speak to her, I am sure of it. Now go to bed, you are on air at two" his voice is still, calm, and there is a slight smile on his lips as he speaks to me. I walk to my room, without another word, but I am determined to see Cat.
I toss and turn in bed for a while, but when I have no luck falling asleep, I decide on going to see Cat, the first place I think to check is the roof, this is where she came when she was nervous before the games, what's stopping her being there now. I get onto the roof, and see nothing, other than darkness, even the lights from the street seems to be gone.
I sigh and walk back to my room for a while, but then I decide to sneak out to the lift and go to the first floor to see Cat. I get to my door and turn on the handle, but I have no luck. My door has been locked from the outside, at first I suspect Erwin, but in reality it could be anyone. I have a strong gut feeling that the capitol want to monitor my every move, starting now.
I walk back to my bed sombrely, and pretend to sleep, until Bernadette wakes me, saying we have a "Busy, busy, busy day!"
I have five minutes to eat something before the prep team come to get me and all I have to say is "They loved you!" and they hear nothing more from me, no questions are asked. I can remain silent for the next few hours.
When Harley makes his appearance, he shoos them away and dresses me in a black lacy dress, and black shoes it's the comfiest I have felt for days, I feel more like myself while I am wearing this. He adjusts my make-up, making my face look as young and innocent as it had last night.
We talk idly, but I am too scared to ask him about anything of real importance. Because after my door was locked, I have a feeling that I am being watched constantly, I wonder if Cat is experiencing the same thing.
The interview takes place down the hall from where I am, meaning Cat has to take the lift she is already seated in the sofa when I get there. It's the same seat from last night, but now it is surrounded by red and pink roses. There are only a few cameras to record this event, and much to my liking no live audience. When Sinjin sees me he gives me a warm hug "Well done, Jadelyn, how are you feeling?" he asks.
"Okay" I say with a small smile, it's a false one, but it's the best they can hope for "I am a little nervous about the interview though" I say with a shrug. A little nervous is an understatement, I don't know what to say or do, anything could spark something in the capitol, one false move and it could e game over.
"Don't be. We are going to have a great time" he smiles.
"I don't really like talking about myself" I admit.
"Don't worry, nothing you say will be wrong" he says, trying to calm my nerves. If only he was right, if only Cat and I could speak freely. For all Cat and I know, President Wood, may already have something planned for us, as we speak.
Then there's Cat, looking amazing in a royal blue dress pulling me off to the side "I hardly get to see you" she says "Felicia seems keen on keeping us apart"- I am guessing 'Felicia' is Cat's mentor- well actually they are more keen on keeping us alive, but there are too many people around for us to get into that.
"Yeah" I say "Everything seems so much more reserved and responsible than it did before" I say with a shrug.
"Well" she shrugs and smiles "There's this and then we can go home, and then they can't keep watching us all the time" she says.
I purse my lips "Yeah, and you'll be in District 1 and I'll be in District 12 and we won't even see each other" I say, it pains me to say this.
Cat nods "Yeah, I know, I'll be in 1 and you'll be in 12" she says, sadness takes over her voice and eyes. "But at least we will have the Victory tour, and we will be able to make visits right?" she asks "I mean, that is if you want to" she adds. I can't believe that after everything, she would question me wanting to see her. I have no time to reply to Cat because they are ready for us.
We sit somewhat formally on the seat, though Sinjin seems all too keen on us cuddling up together, he keeps telling us to make ourselves more comfortable. "Go ahead" he says "I don't mind, it looked sweet" he says.
I smile at him, but still Cat and I remain sitting the way we were, we sit close just not as close as we could be, I never let go of her hand though I keep it locked in mine safely. Someone counts backwards and then we are live on the air.
Sinjin as usual helps a great deal, he is friendly, and makes jokes. He has the same easy relationship with Cat as he has from the start, she answers most of the questions, occasionally I have to speak, but I usually redirect the questions back to, Cat- she's better at this stuff than me.
But soon Sinjin starts asking questions of much more importance "So, Jade" he begins "When did you first realise that you had feelings for Cat? I mean, after all, you instigated the first kiss" he says. He has a huge smile on his face, as he asks me this question.
I sit and think for a moment before I answer " I think" I start "It was pretty much straight away, from the first day I saw her really" I say, and I see Erwin give a sigh of relief, and I know I have done something right.
"Ahh" says Sinjin "Love at first sight" he smiles before turning his attention to Cat "So then Cat" he says looking at the small girl who sits beside me clutching onto my hand. "When did you realise you loved Jade?"
"I think it was when I found her laying near the bushes, and I had to help her" she says her voice is soft, and seems to be lost in thought as she remembers the day she saved me "All I know is that day and every day since then, I would do anything to keep her alive and safe from harm, I can't lose her" she says. And once again Erwin sighs and so does Felicia and I know we have both done something right. Sinjin lays a hand on his chest, showing we have moved him.
I turn to face Cat and I smile at her, my grip on her hand tightens. I don't ever want to lose her, I won't lose her. Cat mentioning harm brings Sinjin on to all the ways we did get hurt, from burns, to stings, to wounds. And then we get onto the mutts, and my scar and my metal plate in my leg.
It's only when Sinjin mentions it that Cat says anything "What scar? What plate?" she asks looking at me from head to toe. And I know I have been lucky to escape with only a metal plate and a scar, I don't know how the doctors managed it, all I know is they did. "It's my fault" she says, I can see the sadness growing in her eyes "It's my fault because I used that tourniquet" she says.
"Cat, it could be worse, I could have lost my leg or my life… All it is is a metal plate I had put in my leg to replace some of the bone that was damaged" I say with a shrug.
"That's true" says Sinjin "Without that tourniquet she would have died" Cat buries her head in the crook of my neck, and she stays there for a while, sobbing quietly into my skin I warp my arms around her and hold her close to me. Sinjin backs off of her for a while until we come to the berries.
"Cat, I must ask you this, I know you have had a shock but. The moment you pulled out those berries, what was going through your mind?" he asks.
Cat takes a while to collect her thoughts, and then she starts to speak, and this is it, this is the moment of truth, the moment where it is said that we challenged the capitol or where we are both so madly in love we can't help what we did "I don't know" she says and her voice is only just audible "I just can't imagine life without her. I never want to live without her" she says, and that's all it needs.
"Anything to add to that Jade?" he asks.
I shake my head "No, she's good for both of us" I know we have both done right, I can see the relief on Erwin's and Felicia's faces. Not only that, but you can feel the anxiety lift from the room. That's where the interview ends. And Cat and I are sent away to prepare for when the train reaches its destinations.
Cat and I are sent a joint room, before we have to say bye to each other- well until the victory tour. I can feel the train slowing. I grip onto Cat's hand, never wanting to let go. I can feel the tears building in my eyes as we pull into the station, of District 1.
You can hear the crowd buzzing outside. All of them screaming for Cat and I, I know now that if I got off here, they would love it. If Cat and I got off the train together at the same stop, the whole of Panem would soon know, and that would be proof right?
If Cat and I decided to stay with each other, if we decided to leave everything behind, so we could be with each other, that would prove our love, and then President Wood, would have no choice but to believe it.
She stands and looks down at me, as I sit on the chair staring up into her eyes. "It'll be okay, Jade" she says "I'll visit whenever I can" she kisses me lightly on the lips; her hands are placed on either side of my face.
She tries to pull away from the short lived kiss but I pull her back towards, me. The kiss becomes more passionate, but still, it is far too short for my liking. She pulls away once again, and gives me a weak smile "Bye, Jade" she says, her voice is only just above a whisper "I love you" she says.
I look back up at her "I love you too" I say, my voice cracks slightly.
She grabs onto my hand one last time, giving it a quick squeeze. I never want her to let go of me, I never want her to leave my side. Just as I am about to open my mouth to object to her leaving, Felicia grabs her elbow and pulls her away from me. She steps off of the train, and the crowd is deafening, even though I am hidden by the metal of the train, I can hear everything. I can hear all of them shouting at her to gain her attention to get pictures, of their District 1 Victor.
I can hear people questioning where I am. It doesn't matter where I am, it matters where I should be, and the answer to that question is I should be out there with Cat, clutching onto her and never having to let go.
The train zooms away, and heads off to District 12, though I can't wait to see Taylor or my mum, and I most definitely can't wait to be back within 12 I can't help but feel like Cat should be joining me. If I'm not in 1 she should be in 12 or vice versa. Cat and I should be together.
Erwin walks into the room and takes the seat next to me. I can feel tears threatening to spill over my eyes, and trickle down my face. He wraps his arm around my shoulder "How are you feeling?" he asks softly.
I shrug at him, not really knowing how to answer the question. I miss her already, and I want to know she is safe. Who am I kidding? Of course she's safe, she's back home in District 1, with food money, and a roof over her head. But I'm on my way back to 12, to live my own life away from her.
"Everything will be fine" he says softly, pulling me slightly closer to him. "There are phones, and trains, nothing is stopping you seeing or speaking to each other" he says "Besides you have the victory tour coming up soon, and then you'll be together again"
The Victory tour, that's the next time I know for certain that I'll be seeing Cat, and I am already counting down the days.
A/N: Here is the final chapter; I hope you have enjoyed reading this as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Thank you to everyone who has read this fic, and a huge thank you to everyone who has reviewed, you have kept me motivated to write this story. Please read and review I appreciate all comments and opinions (good or bad)
P.S. I just want to say another huge thank you. I really hope you have enjoyed this story.