The horrible tormenting feeling in your gut when you know that your alone? Yes most people experience this feeling once in there life. Unfortunatly that feeling is constently wafting over my head like a black cloud. My father hates me. You may think that i'm just over doing this description but no. My father hated me ever since he found out I was born a girl and not a boy. I've been trying my very best to try and prove to him that I can be a good daughter to him but without luck. He never once he had told me he loved me or he was proud of me. He hates me because of feminity. He has called me worthless idiot mistake and many other names i don't wish to put up on this. Honestly I think i'm the only one who feels this way in the world but I have no idea. I hate dealing with this all day. Here is the letter i had wrote to him who didn't bother to Dad,I'm sorry i'm not the child of perfectness. I know you would probably want to have a son or have Itzel(my cousin) instead. I know I stink at sports and playing outside but that is just not me! I love to draw,write,read,and use the internet. I am so dishearted by the fact that you love to torment me and blame me for your own problems. It kills me inside. I know you hate the fact that i like japanese,chinese,african,and etc. cultures. I am sorry that I want to learn about other cultures instead of my own. I know everything about your Hispanic life and American life,but I hear so much about it all the time so why is it so bad that I want to try different things? Why is it so bad not to constently speak,breath,watch,and live hispanic life? I am proud of my hispanic heritage but that is not a reason for you to make fun of me. Sam(my little sister) is ashamed of her heritage but you say nothing about it. Your never hard on her or the boys (my 2 little brothers). If I could I would probably give up my life for Emma. (My baby sister that died) If I had died then you would just forget about me. You would only care about the present and not what happened to your eldest daughter. You have no idea how hard I have been trying to impress you. I'm sorry I can't be your perfect little girl. With love,Your Daughter
Thank you for reading this. If you just opened it because your bored mabey you should scroll up and actually read this. I put all of my feelings on this and I appreciate the people who take the time to read this.