Since they deleted player stories off the Sims Wiki, I'm going to abuse Fanfiction for these now. Narrator is Phineaus Furley, from the University game for the second installment, if you're unfamiliar. The college is linked to Pleasantview, if any of those names come up.

I always thought you had to be in a fraternity to party like that. In case you were wondering, it was the first celebration of the year for the first seniors to actually make it that far in Academie Le Tour's last twenty years. The academic rigor is usually too much for most students to handle; they almost all transfer to Sim State. The honors this year went to Jonah Powers and Roxanna "Roxie" Sharpe. They were preparing to graduate – not soon enough, according to Roxanna's brother. She lived separately from her semi-ex-boyfriend, the term I used to describe the relationship that was off, now on again. She had his kids her sophomore year, and the deadbeat wanted nothing to do with his twin daughters, now almost two years old. I would shake my head every time I thought about the Sharpe twins, Kelly and Tuesday. I always wanted kids. How could a father not want his own children?

But I went way off on a tangent there. The point was, it was the first big party off the year, and we were all invited. Marla, Delilah, Emily…all very attractive girls, none of whom were interested in being seen with me, let alone breeding. Yes, I was a twenty-year-old virgin. Get over it. Emily was going out with a guy from SSU and Delilah was with Roxanna's brother Ed, although she was apparently unaware, but for Ed, we all just backed off. And rumor had it shrinking violet Marla was engaged to some mystery guy.

And then there was our threesome: the motliest crew on campus: me, Chazwick Whippler, and Ellen Frost. We were all on the same floor of our wing freshman year: Chaz and I were roommates and Ellen lived next door with some girl called Kay. Chaz took to Ellen and has been harboring some crush on her since. She remains clueless, probably because he has no problem flirting in front of her and he treats her the same as every other girl. Which isn't true…the man is prouder of his sexual escapades than Akon. But perhaps it was that reluctance to make the first move that made me actually believe he was serious with her. But try to make a woman believe she's different in your eyes than every other girl you've hit.

So, yeah. Party at the Sharpes'. Didn't think it would take long for the beer to come out. Just because we're students at a prestigious college doesn't mean we don't like to get hammered. Soon, it was all-out drinking battle between Powers and Erik Forte. I drunkenly hit on Emily Lee, who was the second-most sober person at the party…well, I guess she was the most sober after Marla left before the cops busted us.

So, rejected, I went over to sit by Chazwick and lament. Which was a mistake. He was already sitting with Ellen. I hid behind the potted plant, trying not to step on a passed-out Ed. I waited.

"Hey…" he slurred. She, horribly red in the face, looked at him with her perpetual scowl. It was his "fault" she was here instead of studying for her midterms.

"What?" she snapped fairly cognitively.

"Hey…I wanna tell ya somethin'…"

"Ihcan wait till yur sober." (A/N: To make sense of this, you may want to try saying some of it aloud.)

"Nah really. I cantell ya when I am, 'cause it'll be gone…"


"And, ya know…drunken wor's are jus' sober though's."

"It," she said, before hiccupping. "Betta be good, Chiz."

"Yeah…I love ya, Eln."

"In other words," she said, regaining all her motor of her jaw, "ya ran outta girls an' wanna get in my pants."

"Eln. People who love each otha let them in pan's."

"I'll hafta be drunker than this."

While he kept from saying it, I could tell by the look on his face, it was "Challenge Accepted." He got up and came back with two cups. While apparently sober enough to say no to sex, she wasn't sober enough to care what was really in the cups. She downed the whole Dixie cup in one and the two went off to either get another beer or...any number of other things.

I didn't see them the rest of the night…or, anyone else for that matter. I decided I liked it in my corner by Ed and stayed there, eventually passing out.

"Get up, man."


"We passed out," said the voice right above me. I blearily opened my eyes. Ed had gotten up. Standing on his knees, he looked around at the room, which still smelt of alcohol and was a rather more offensive shade of orange than the night before. "Tell me we didn't – "

"Don't even go there, Ed."

"Aw, Finn, if Del saw that…"

"I don't think your chances with her have been affected at all, Ed." I said, sitting up.

"Yeah, well, that's simple for you to say…you don't know her like I do. She judges, man, and once her opinion is formed, you're set like that."

"Therefore, her opinion of you should've been set ages ago and nothing should've changed." I stood, wobbling slightly on legs that felt like jello. "You have class, bro?"

"Nah…thank God…"

"Wondered if you two were ever getting up," said a voice from the doorway. I looked where Ed was staring. Roxanna had entered with one of her red-haired daughters on each hip. "I was about to call an ambulance."

"Hey, sis."

"Yeah, don't "Hey, sis" me," she snapped irately. "You weren't the one who had to get up hungover and early to get the kids." She was talking like Ed was the irresponsible father. Ed got up and crossed to her. She cocked her hips and he relieved her of one of the twins from the higher one. Then he stumbled back to me in the plant corner.

"She's…?" I said, indicating the child reaching for my face.

"Kelly: her eyes are green." Then we went silent. Roxanna had changed a lot since she had the twins; she wouldn't have had any problem with our behavior last night pre-pregnancy. Her disapproving eyes, exactly like her daughter's, would not stop staring disapprovingly at us. I shuffled my feet awkwardly. The baby had my glasses in her fist but droppped them so they were hanging off my opposite ear. The silence was too loud for me. Luckily I had an excuse.

"Well, you may not have class, but I do. Plus, I don't know where El and Chazwick got to."

"Oh, they left fairly early. Ellen was drunk as a freakin' skunk and Chaz had his nasty face on." Why does she remember that? Better yet, why does she know what "that" face looks like on Chaz?

"Anyway…I'll call you later, Ed." I said, wobbling my way to the door.

If you're still reading this, I must applaud you. This, to me, is good, but I can't imagine anyone else caring. Anyway, if it's good enough, I know exactly where I want this to go and will continue. These always start out really slowly, but they'll get better. Reviews always welcome here.