Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended.
I swear I drank less in college than I do at these weekly meet-ups.
The tiny town of Forks has been my home for the last six months since I took on the project of building my mom a restaurant in her hometown. I always thought it was her dream to come back and rub her success in the face of the people she grew up with, but I get it now. This town has such charm and closeness that you can't help but to accept even the people you don't like.
Felix folds and it's between Billy and Charlie who has the winning hand. Charlie's full house beats out Billy's three of a kind. It's for the best that the chief usually wins.
Then we're on to casseroles and cobbler before another hand is dealt. My dad told me before I came out here, "If you want to have a good time in that town, you go tell Chief Swan I sent you out there."
I met the chief and I was instantly included in the Saturday bachelors' nights. All the men bring whatever dishes the single ladies in town prepared for them. It's a pissing contest to see who made what for whom. I get casseroles and pies from all the same women they do, but I only bring over what I get from Kate. They're jealous because she's never made anything for them, but it works, since I'm not competing for the same affections that they are.
Not that I want Kate's affection, but I don't mind these guys believing that I do. Although, I don't know if Kate is interested in me; I just assumed she felt bad for all those nights she saw me eating alone in the diner.
"That Kate makes the best peach cobbler I've ever had," Peter says over his second helping.
"You stickin' it to that girl yet?" Felix asks and everyone laughs when I hang my head, embarrassed. They can think what they want. I won't confirm or deny anything. I've never been one to sleep around. I've had a few drunken one-night slip-ups, but every time I say never again. I guess I'm not sexually driven enough to pursue any woman in this town. Relationships should fall into place on their own, but maybe that's why I'm twenty-seven and still single.
Kate's a nice lady who is a little older than me and a little younger than these guys. I mow her lawn sometimes because I don't know how else to repay her for the food. Never once has she invited me in. Maybe I'm naïve, but I see it as a sign that we are on the same page.
Charlie pats me on the back and says, "She's a good woman, and you're a good man for not speakin' about it."
He pours a round of scotch and for hours it's poker, beer, and rounds of scotch. It's talk of who is screwing who and who would make a good wife. It's agreed by all of them that they'll need a few years before settling down. Which is funny because besides Peter, all these men have been married and divorced. They've already been living as bachelors for years.
Another round of scotch, even though I can't stand the stuff. But I'm not a wimp, so I drink it down.
"What are we going to do when your Bella gets home?" Billy asks Charlie about his daughter being home for the summer. Poor kid, she must have been completely sheltered growing up with a protective man like Charlie for a father.
He strokes his mustache contemplating. "I guess we'll have to skip the scotch and keep the conversation about sports and fishin'."
I've drunk way too much, but I'm fighting like hell not to let the effects show.
Felix deals another round then asks, "What about that fishin' trip? You taking her with us?"
"She can stay at my house. Jake and the boys'll take care of her," Billy states and even I know Charlie isn't going to let his precious little girl stay in a house full of guys.
"I'm sure they'll take care of her, all right," Felix snickers.
I notice the overhead light flash off the blade before I realize Chief Swan has just pulled out a knife and stabbed the table.
I think Felix would be safer if he ran out and jumped over a cliff.
Felix recovers quickly and says, "Best not be letting that princess stay out there."
Charlie nods and looks to me, and it's almost enough for the alcohol to push out the vomit I've been trying so hard to avoid.
"You don't want to go on this trip anyway. You can stay here and make sure my little girl doesn't get into any trouble." It's not a question.
"Yes, sir. I can do that." How hard could that be? From what I've heard, she's a good kid. Charlie is so proud of her, as he rightfully should be. If I had a daughter, I'm sure I'd be boasting about her left and right, and I'd be damn sure to keep the up-to-no-good boys away from her.
Next thing I know, I'm waking up in a bright pink room surrounded by stuffed puppy dogs and teddy bears.
My head is throbbing as I sit up in what I assume is Charlie's kid's room.
I know the girl lived here until she left for college last year, but seriously, this is the room of an eight-year-old. I know Charlie still thinks of her as his little princess, but maybe she really never grew up. I stand up and am face-to-face with a shelf full of Barbie dolls.
I go to the zoning hearing for the restaurant location and go over plan after plan with my mother. Most of her wants are impossible, and I'm tempted to take a break from her restaurant and see about making a few connections in Seattle.
Charlie cancels poker night two weeks in a row. His daughter is filling his time with shopping trips and hikes he doesn't want to go on. I have a new respect for him though, even if he's a hard ass. That girl has him wrapped around her finger.
I stop in for lunch at the diner and take my usual seat at the end of the counter. Maggie walks over and fills my coffee mug almost immediately before running to the back to grab the phone. It's hard to look at her with all I know about what happens between her and Charlie behind closed doors.
Two seats down a soaking wet, pretty brunette sets down her purse and removes her drenched jacket. She grabs a napkin and wipes rain off her face.
"Oh wow! Did you walk here?" I ask the woman, handing her my napkin as well.
"Yes. I don't know what I was thinking." She laughs and takes the seat beside me rather than the one her jacket's now draped over.
"The special, as usual?" Maggie holds a pen over her notepad and looks annoyed, as if I've caused her to wait. Maybe she's been standing there awhile.
"Yes, that sounds good." I hand her the menu I never bothered to look at.
Maggie turns to the woman. "And little miss, it's always nice to see you. What will it be?"
If Maggie knows her, how have I never seen her before? There's no way I could have overlooked her.
"The special sounds great. Thanks, Maggie."
When Maggie is gone, she leans sideways toward me. "What's the special?" she whispers.
"I have no idea," I laugh with her.
There's a round of thunder and rain starts pouring down. She's visibly cringing. I don't want her to be scared to get home.
"I don't think it's letting up anytime soon. Are you going to need a ride somewhere?" The words fall out of my mouth before I realize I've asked her to get in a car with me and we haven't even officially met.
She bites her lip and glances back outside. "I actually really do. Would it be out of your way? My house isn't very far from here."
"I'm only going home after this, so it's no big deal. I'm Edward." I reach out to shake her hand, and when I look into her eyes as we're connected skin to skin, we hold hands and eyes and she doesn't say anything or let go either.
A clatter of a dish breaking back in the kitchen shatters the moment, and she drops my hand looking down. Maybe she's sort of embarrassed, but all I feel is warm.
"Bella," she says as she looks back up at me. She's smiling and I was, but now I'm definitely not.
"Oh. Charlie's kid." I point at her like it just dawned on me.
"The one and only," Bella smirks, but it's not much of a smile anymore.
"Are you the architect?" She mimics the way I pointed at her.
"That'd be me." I turn to my coffee and stop looking at her. I don't remember the last time, if ever, that I had such a genuine interest in getting to know someone, but this is a bad idea.
The special is delivered to both of us at the same time. It's some kind of grilled fish and rice. I don't eat fish, plain as simple as that. I don't like it.
"Damn," she mutters. I look over at Bella as she's glaring at her plate. She's obviously not pleased with the fish either.
"Sorry. The special has never steered me wrong before." I don't even know what to do right now. Do I order us something else? Hey, sorry we ordered this, but we didn't want it. Would that be rude?
"It's fine. I've been tolerating this stuff my whole life. We just have to cover it in lemon juice and tartar sauce and hope there's no bones." She starts squeezing the lemon wedges, and I follow her lead.
Together we choke down the meal. Every bite she takes gives me the will to take one more.
She reaches up for a high five when we finish our plates and says, "We deserve dessert for that, right?"
"We deserve a piece of pie and a milk shake."
She giggles and it's the cutest thing. I want to hear it again, but not just hear it; I want to be the cause of it.
"You're going to have to learn to eat fish without gagging. My dad loves fish."
And just like that I'm back to 'this girl is off limits'. I need to get her home and stay away.
"I'll work on that."
Maggie comes over and takes our plates and our dessert orders. We both order vanilla shakes and apple pie.
We already have too much in common.
She's too open and friendly. I can't stop talking to her.
Soon after our dessert arrives, Bella's phone rings and she takes the call.
"No, I'm fine. Edward's here. He said he'd give me a ride home." I assume it's Charlie.
While she's on the phone, I step into the bathroom. I want this to be okay. I want to be able to talk to this girl, maybe ask to see her again and have it be okay. The same girl I'm supposed to basically babysit in two weeks. The little girl of a man who stabs shit when someone implies someone else may be interested in her. Charlie Swan, Chief of Police, owner of guns and knives, he's the law in this town. I respect him enough to not go after his daughter. I just didn't know his little girl was not a little girl at all.
Poker night is back on next weekend. I should just back out. It'd be safer than pretending I have minimal interest in getting to know Bella.
There are a lot of ways I'd like to get to know Bella.
I splash cool water on my face and repeat a few times out loud, "I've got to let this go."
Back at the counter Bella has finished eating, so I pay the bill.
She doesn't object when I pay for hers. What she does is blush when she says, "Thanks."
I think I just turned this into a date, and now I've got to take her home.
Her jacket is drenched. I made it inside before the downpour started, so I offer her mine.
She smiles like she's flattered as she slips it on.
I wonder if I have enough acting skills to start acting like an asshole. Honestly, I'm being vain. She's a nice girl. I can't mistake her friendliness for more than it is. Even if I'm interested, it doesn't mean she is. With her now, I don't feel the age difference, but it's still there.
I open the passenger door and she slides in, again with the smiling, "Thanks."
It's less than a five minute drive, and we keep the conversation about school and work. I want to know everything about her, and I wish she was anyone else but Charlie's daughter.
I pull into the same driveway that I've pulled into a few dozen times before. The gentleman in me wants to get out and open her door, but then what? Do I walk her to her front door? I'm just dropping her off at home. That is all this is.
She doesn't get out of the car. Leaning her head back on the seat, she turns to look at me. "I guess my dad's not home yet. Do you want to come in? I've got a stew in the crock pot. You could stay for dinner if you don't have plans."
If I just say no, she could mention it to Charlie, and he'll be suspicious as to why I'd turn down dinner at his house. Saying yes I'm likely to cause a greater deal of suspicion when I won't be able to stop myself from looking at his daughter.
"Thanks for offering, but I don't want to intrude on your time with your dad. I know he really misses you."
"Oh, okay. That's fine." She doesn't get out of the car, so I look straight ahead and wait for her to go.
Small warm fingers take my right hand and squeeze.
"Edward?" Her voice is so soft. I turn to face her. I don't move my hand. I don't squeeze back, but I don't move hers off either.
"I'm sure there will be leftovers, and my dad works tomorrow, so we could have lunch again."
Knives stuck in tables. Barbie dolls. Teddy Bears. She's a little girl. This is just a friendly gesture. Tell her you have to work. Maybe another time.
I turn to tell her why I can't go, and she's closer than I realized. I lose my words when the tip of her tongue glides out across her lip and she starts leaning forward. She's feeling the same connection I am, and for a moment I really just want to kiss her before I tell her no. Just feel her lips one time and walk away. But I'm not a selfish person, and she's a young girl; she'll move on.
I turn my head and look away, like I never noticed her leaning toward me in the first place. I squeeze her hand.
"You're a good kid, Bella. I know your dad needs a lot of taking care of, but you don't need to worry about me. I'll manage." Her hand slides out of mine, and when I look over at her, I see the rejection and confusion written all over before she covers it up.
"How old are you anyway?" she asks as she opens the car door.
"Old. Twenty-seven." Too old for you.
"That's not so old. Oh, I almost forgot about your jacket." She starts to remove it, and without thinking I reach out and halt her hand.
"It's still raining. I'll just get it back this weekend." She nods and my hand lingers a few seconds longer before she's out of the car and running to her front door.
When I get to my current home, in the guest house behind my mother's childhood house, I bang my head against the wall. Eventually, I'll beat every image of Bella Swan out of my head, or I'll knock myself out.
It doesn't matter. The vision of her face is ingrained in my mind: her amusement at the diner, her leaning toward me so close, and the hurt on her face when I turned her down.
Sleep. I can sleep her off. I'm drunk on fluctuating emotions. This will pass.
My bed is too big and cold. I can't stop thinking about what it would be like to wake up tangled in brown waves of hair. My thoughts drift to fantasies of trailing my lips from her neck, to her lips, and down until I'm between her thighs. Imagining her here makes me feel even more alone.
The next few days are a blur. I work on the restaurant site plan until my eyes burn. Nothing looks right.
Poker night is on. I don't shave because it's somehow a sign of how much older I am. It's ridiculous.
Bella greets me at the door.
"Hi, Edward. How are you?" Her friendliness is forced.
"Great. How are you?" I look into her too-sad eyes and miss the bright sweetness from when we first met.
"Okay. Ready to go back to California. My dad ran to get more beer, and no one else is here yet. I guess just go do whatever it is you do here." She closes the door as I enter. Her eyes stay on the ground, but mine haven't stopped looking at her.
I put the case of beer I brought in the fridge. Bella lingers around but doesn't say anything.
"Do you miss school, or do you have a boyfriend you want to get back to?" I ask stupid questions. Despite Charlie's goal of keeping guys away, I'm sure she dates when she's at school.
"No and no. Not too many of my friends came home for the summer. I like seeing my dad, but it's all summer just me and my dad. Or he's working and it's just me. Next year, I'll probably just come for a few weeks." Bella starts stirring whatever she has cooking on the stove.
I want to offer to go somewhere with her. Life is playing cruel jokes on me.
"That smells really good. Do you need help with anything?" She looks over and her smiles almost real.
"It's just spaghetti. You could chop up some lettuce for a salad." That I've done before.
We work side by side for seconds, hours, or years, I don't know. It's not long enough.
She hums while she cooks. I can barely hear it; it's just a low vibration.
"Taste this," she says as she blows on a spoonful of sauce. I reach up to grab the spoon, but she has it up to my mouth before I get a chance to do it myself.
"It's really good." She takes the same spoon that was just in my mouth and licks off the small remainder I left.
She has to be doing this on purpose. I'm going to die tonight, either by her or her father.
Her eyes are too much, so I glance down.
I can't deal with boobs too.
Even thinking about pressing my lips to her chest could get me arrested. I'm the last person Chief Swan should have entrusted with his daughter.
"Is that a locket?" I ask about the chain hanging from her neck, to cover up where I was actually blatantly staring.
"Yes." She takes it in her hands and carefully opens it up. "It's my parent's wedding. My dad got it for me when they got divorced. He said it was so I would always remember I came from love, even if I couldn't see it anymore." From the look on her face and the sound of her voice, I can tell it's a bittersweet memory.
"You're really close with your dad, huh?" I already know the answer, but I don't know how she feels about it.
"Yeah, it's different with both my parents. My dad babies me and is always trying to protect me, but I have to make sure he takes care of himself. With my mom, I can tell her anything, but I'm the one who worries about her." She smiles as she explains.
"So it's like two different lives."
"Yes, I guess I've always just been a natural at accommodating people."
I just smile and nod. I don't tell her how I'd like to find out how accommodating she can be, or how much I really don't want to know.
While looking at her locket, I moved too close in order to see the tiny picture.
Bella rubs her thumb along my unshaven jaw. "I like this."
You weren't supposed too.
I can't stop this.
Her face tilts up; she runs her tongue across her lower lip. I can't help the force as I lean down.
The front door is opened, and I turn away and regroup.
"Hey, Edward. My little girl getting you to do her bidding, too?" Charlie asks as he catches me mixing the salad.
"Guess so." I look around and realize Bella has disappeared.
"I told you I was bringing beer. How much do we need?" I motion to the two cases he set on the counter.
"I've been good for weeks. I need this."
I just shake my head. Drinking isn't the best idea for me tonight.
Charlie leans towards me and whispers, "So next weekend, I need you to make some excuse why you need to stay here. Call me up that day and let me know. You gotta make me believe it. She can't know you're watching out for her, or she'll run wild. And whatever you do, don't let her go to La Push. I'm not trying to control her, but no kid in this town is good enough for her."
"Okay. I got it."
"Glad I can count on you. The shotgun is in the coat closet. I'll get you a bottle of scotch when I get back."
Everyone else starts arriving. It's about an hour after I got here. I guess I missed the memo that poker night is later when Bella is around.
I help Bella pass out plates, and no one else offers to help. She keeps giving me sideways glances, and I'm dreading the moment I have to put that rejected look back on her face.
We're all seated around the table, and Bella is diagonally across from me to the right. I don't look at her.
"So, Edward, How's Kate treatin' ya?" Felix asks. I thought we weren't talking about this shit.
I put my head down like I always do.
"You know Katie right, Bella?" Charlie asks.
"Yeah, she's works at the diner."
I don't look at her.
"Well she's got our Edward here tongue-tied." He pats my back.
I twirl the spaghetti on my fork and watch it spin.
"Why? She's old." She sounds agitated, but I'm sure to everyone else she just sounds disgusted.
I look at her.
She looks annoyed, but then she looks at me and her eyes close then stay down.
"Age gaps aren't as big when you're an adult, Bella." Charlie is the only one brave enough to answer her. I'm not sure if they are more scared of her or Charlie.
"Oh, so you all date women ten years older than you?" She looks around the table.
Nobody looks at her.
"Well, not usually. A few years older maybe," Charlie answers.
"Maybe I should date someone ten years older." Bella smirks.
"Here we go. Why don't you just worry about college?"
She rolls her eyes at him and finishes eating.
When she takes her plate and a few others to the kitchen, Charlie turns to me and says, "Sorry about that. I don't know what's gotten into her."
I take the rest of the plates and join her in the kitchen. It's safe to say none of these guys will come in here if there's a chance they might be put to work.
I rinse the plates in the sink as Bella puts away leftovers. She walks over and leans back beside me next to the sink.
"So Kate?" I can feel her stare.
I just shrug. What am I supposed to say about Kate?
"Are you in love with her?" I should lie.
I shake my head and say, "No."
"Just fucking her then?" I cringe at her tone.
"No." I look at her and she visibly relaxes.
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Fucking someone?" she asks, like it would be a punishable crime if I was.
"No. Can we stop talking about this?"
"Fine. Will you go somewhere with me tomorrow?
"Bella, it's not a good idea."
"You're making a mistake, but I think you already know that."
She goes upstairs and doesn't come back.
Cards are dealt and I keep an ear out for footsteps on the stairs. They make up for their lack of scotch, by throwing beers back like they're nothing.
My eyes land on the slit in the wood left in the table by the knife. Looking around the table, there are at least a dozen of the same marks.
I drink slow and then not at all. Charlie is glaring at Billy because he asked Sue out to dinner. There will probably be a rift between the two of them for a while.
I give up on Bella coming back downstairs and head home.
Next weekend, I'll be alone with her with no interruption. Hopefully, she's given up on me, but I'd rather Charlie stab me than make her feel rejected again.
I pour everything into finishing the site plan for the restaurant. By some crazy miracle, my mom only asks for minor changes.
Mid-week I mow Kate's lawn, and she asks me to come in. Of all the days for her to ask, this is the only one I would actually consider it.
"Just fucking her then?" If I was, Bella wouldn't want anything to do with me.
I don't go inside.
Friday comes and I know Charlie wants to head out early.
I call him up.
"Hey, Charlie. I had a plumbing leak and I had to shut off the water. I'm not going to be able to get someone out here until Monday." I lie.
"Awful news. You could stay here; let me okay it with Bella." His voice becomes more distant like the phone is no longer to his ear. "Hey, Bells, Edward has a plumbing issue and has to keep the water off all weekend. You okay with him crashing here?"
I hear nothing but my own heartbeat for too long.
"Um, I guess that's okay. Maybe he could give me a ride to Port Angeles." She sounds indifferent. It's for the best, but I don't like it.
"All right, it's all good if you don't mind being a taxi service."
Charlie asks me to give her a couple hours to herself, so she doesn't catch on. I pack a bag for the weekend and pick up some groceries.
I can be friends with Bella. Charlie wouldn't expect me not to talk to her.
I ring the doorbell, balancing four different bags.
Bella opens the door, and her face is back to the easygoing happy it was that first day.
"I have food. Did you think I wasn't going to feed you?" she says as she grabs a bag.
The second I set the bags on the kitchen counter, Bella is in my arms. Her arms wrap around my neck. The need to keep this platonic is outweighed by the need to touch her as my arms wrap around her waist.
"How did you get my dad to let you stay here?" She loosens her grip and her forehead rests on mine.
I have to tell her the truth; just one kiss and then the truth or no truth at all.
No kiss, just truth.
"Bella, I didn't. He asked me to keep an eye on you." She tenses and her arms fall, but I don't let go and she doesn't make me. Her face is more confused than sad.
"Why? If he's trying to protect my virtue, he's a few years too late. I'm nineteen, I don't need a babysitter."
"He's just worried, but I still want to get to know you. I hope we can be friends," I tell her as I let go of her.
"Okay. We can talk tomorrow. I actually have other plans tonight. Oh. And don't worry, I'll let my dad know what a great job you did watching out for me," she says as she retreats away from me.
I assume from the interest that she's showed in me that she doesn't have a boyfriend. Maybe she's just fucking someone as she says, someone here in Forks.
I can't let her go.
I'll just tell her, "I want to give this a chance," and be an old pervert. Or maybe a scared kid and tell her, "We can do whatever you want, just don't tell your dad."
Even if Charlie's house is rigged with cameras, what could possibly happen? We'll kiss a few times and I'll put my arm around her as we sit side by side on the couch. Maybe she will fall asleep with her head on my shoulder.
Her bedroom door is slightly ajar, and I can hear her moving around. When I knock on the door, it opens wide enough to see inside. She doesn't acknowledge me, but I'm sure she knows I'm here. She's changed into a short skirt and tight shirt that Charlie probably doesn't know she owns.
"Are you going somewhere?" If she insists on going out, I'll just go with her.
"I don't know. I can't figure out what to wear." She's smearing stuff on her lips and rubbing them together.
"Are you here to tell me I'm not allowed to go out?" She turns to look at me.
"No, but I would like it if you stayed."
"So we can talk."
"I don't like the things you say when we talk."
She rubs her fingertips along the edge of her pleated skirt. Her hands slide up her leg, pulling the sides of her skirt up with them. When she reaches just below her waist her hands slide back down. In the blink of an eye, a white g-string falls to the ground at her feet.
Without looking away from me, she lifts her feet and steps to the side.
I can feel my throat bob with how hard I swallow. All the blood in my body rushes down so fast I'll probably faint.
This is a dream. Bella is a sweet girl and would never make advances like this. This is the disgusting place in my mind that takes a nice girl like Bella Swan and turns her into a seductress.
As she saunters towards me, I back away until I hit a wall and squeeze my eyes open and shut and will this to just be a dream.
She stands on her toes to speak in my ear. "Tell me you don't want me." Her voice is a breathy moan.
I can't speak.
I think of nothing but slowing down my racing heart.
She takes my hand and guides it under her skirt. I curl my fingers against her bare, sleek sex, and I breathe through a shudder of want and nerves.
This is not why I came up here.
She slinks down to her knees.
I need to stop her.
I have to stop her.
She locks her eyes up with mine as she yanks open the button on my jeans.
Why did I think I could stop her?
Her fingers pull down my zipper painstakingly slow.
She's daring me to stop her.
I don't want to stop her.
She's not a little girl. Her room is pink. There are teddy bears witnessing their girl kill me slowly. They probably don't know she's not a little girl.
She relieves me of the confines of my pants so carefully.
She never stops looking at me.
But one glance to where I'm now exposed and reaching out for her, and she sighs and bites that lip she's always biting on.
"Are you sure you don't want me?" Her eyes are still on mine, but her mouth is open, ready to take me in.
I look away. Her ceiling is filled with glow in the dark stars I'm sure her daddy put up for her.
Her mouth is already against my tip as she says, "Tell me to stop."
I don't tell her to stop.
She doesn't stop.
I close my eyes and lean my head back against the wall as I'm brought to the sweetest, hottest place I've ever been.
There's nothing to hold on to.
She's moving so slow, like she's trying so hard to make me lose control.
I look down and instantly regret it. She's still looking at me, acting like this is all innocent. She takes an inch and then another. Her mouth opens wider as she slides back with just her tongue on me.
I suck in a shaky breath, and she smiles because she knows she's doing this. And then she does it. She takes me in her mouth as far as she can, and then she moves back and forth fast, but not fast enough.
I close my eyes again and focus on not moving. I'll never forgive myself if I ram forward down her throat.
Then this really becomes a dream because I'm no longer in my own head. A glance to the side and I see her own hand is up her skirt.
She shouldn't have to do that.
I reach under her arms and lift her up as her legs wrap around me.
When I have her back laid across her bed, legs spread, hanging over the side, I briefly wonder if she planned this. She raises her ass up and reaches behind, pulling a condom from the waistband of her skirt.
She tears the wrapper with her teeth and rolls it down my length faster than I could have.
Her hand stays around me as I hover over top of her, and she guides me to her entrance, and with one slow push I'm engulfed inside.
I want to be gentle with her, but she starts bucking her hips, and I'm plunging forward to meet her speed. Her head is tossing back and forth, and she moans each time we collide.
I stop being careful. This sweet girl doesn't want careful. I pound into her and her back arches. She's clamping down all around me and yelling out incoherently.
When her body calms, I find a steadier rhythm, and when she starts meeting my thrusts, I fall over the edge with release.
I stay on top inside her as we both pant, out of breath.
"You fuck so good," she laughs with delirious pleasure.
I slide out and drop the condom in the wastebasket beside the bed.
I shove my dick back in my pants where it belongs. I didn't even kiss her. All I wanted was to kiss her.
I sit down beside her where she still lies. "I'm sorry."
She sits up and moves over top, straddling me.
"Please don't pull away from me." Her body is shaking like she's panicking. And I don't want to do that. She shouldn't hurt or be scared that I don't want this, but that's all I've ever given her.
"I'm not. I don't think I can anymore." I'm relieved that she physically relaxes.
She takes my face in her hands. "Baby, why are you fighting this so hard?"
"You're so sweet and perfect. You're Charlie's little girl. I'm supposed to look out for you." I put my hands on her hips so she knows my words don't mean I'm rejecting her.
I can feel her breath on my mouth as she says, "I'm your girl."
"I like that," I say as I draw her in close and hold her.
"So let me worry about my dad. He's not going to hurt you."
I nod and trust her. It doesn't matter. This is worth it.
"I came up here because I wanted to get to know you and maybe hold and kiss you," I confess.
"And I ruined it by seducing you." She presses her forehead to mine and pouts.
"No. I'm sorry I didn't kiss you or even get your clothes off. You deserved for me to show you how I can love you."
"Show me," she whispers.
When I lean forward, she meets me halfway. I press my lips against hers with only slight pressure. Her mouth's so soft and moves against mine so perfectly, it's as if I've never been kissed before. Over and over I give her gentle kisses until she can't take it, and she's pulling me toward her with her fingers fisted in my hair. Our kisses deepen and the second our tongues meet, my girl is moaning.
I only intended to kiss her sweetly, but she's grinding her hips. If she wants more I'll give her more. I get harder with every moan.
When I slide my hands up her ribcage under her top, she doesn't waste time, just rips it off. Her breasts swell over black lace with a tiny white bow in the center. I kiss her skin just above the material, and when she pushes against me I bite just a little. Her breathing shudders, so I move to the other side and try it again. Using my tongue, I feel the line of skin just above her bra, sometimes dipping under. A few passes back and forth and then I bite down again, harder. Her breath catches and she reaches behind her back and the black lace loosens, and then falls.
I want to watch her breasts as she breathes up and down and then caress and hold them, but she arches forward. She can't handle this; she can't wait. I want to love her slow, but I love that she needs this.
Her skin is covered in goose bumps and her nipples are hardened pebbles. I pull one in my mouth and I'm going to tease her a bit before I bite down, but her hand is already moving down under her skirt.
She can't wait at all.
I stop her hand. "I was getting there."
She whimpers, "Please." So I help her slide the skirt down her legs, and she lays back completely naked, pleading for me.
I remove my own clothes and she just watches, fidgeting more and more. She's rubbing her legs together, so I reach between them to touch her where I only touched her so briefly before.
She whines in protest.
"I'm trying to love you slow."
"You did. Now show me how you can love me fast." Her arms reach out for me.
I reach over to my jeans down on the floor and grab the condom I keep in my wallet. Then I hand it to her so she can open it, and I can touch her slow and gentle like I want to.
She tries to roll it on, but she doesn't have the dexterity from this position. I reach down and help her.
There's no chance for more slow moments as she wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me down. My erection is lined up where she wants it, but I rub it outside until she whimpers and pushes.
I move inside her, and she makes it known that even though I'm on top of her, she's in full control.
She moves as fast and as hard as she wants to, and then she's digging her fingers in my ass and pushing me to grind on her in circles. I know I'm doing it right when she lets go and closes her eyes.
I want to move in and out, but she's panting with the circular motion. Her lower lip sticks out slightly, so I suck it in my mouth and then bite down.
Her breathing speeds up and she's looking in my eyes, panting, "I'm gonna, I'm gonna…"
And then she does. I find my rhythm through her moaning and clamping, and I spill out right as she relaxes.
"I don't know how I ever lived without you." I tell, her still on top of her looking in her eyes.
"You love me so good, baby." We smile, and I hope I'm mirroring back the same contentment I see in her features.
"I know you're leaving in a week, but when will you be back?" I ask as I lie down beside her.
"Christmas. That's not so long right?" She has a slightly worried look again, but she doesn't need to do that.
"It's too long. I'll just drive down every couple weeks." She squeals and she throws her arms around my neck and her soft chest presses against mine.
"Are you less worried about my dad?"
"I'm trying not to think about it. Why do you have a pink room filled with toys?" I ask as I pull a big eyed cat from behind her head.
She laughs embarrassed and says, "When I was seven, I begged my dad to make my room pink and display all my dolls. He worked so hard on it that I never had the heart to change it."
I love her all weekend, slow and then as fast as she wants. Charlie gets home and gives me a bottle of scotch when I assure him Bella never left my sight.
Every moment she can get away, she's with me. She doesn't want to deal with Charlie until it's time to leave. Probably in case it doesn't go well. I crave her to the point I'm ready to finish my job here and move out to California, but we're not entirely ready for that conversation.
The day before she leaves she lets me love her slow for longer, the way I want to. She can't take it; she keeps trying to push and then slows herself down. And even though I swore I'd be with her within a few weeks, tears slide down her cheeks when it's time to leave.
I feel empty now without her, but it's not the end, so I get through the days until it's time for poker night at Charlie's.
Nothing seems different or off with him, and I don't know if Bella is wrong. I've talked to her every night since she left, and she swears it's fine.
We're around the table and Charlie's dealing. "So nothing from Kate this week."
Fuck. I didn't even think about that.
"Nope." I keep my eyes on my cards.
"Do you find something wrong with my daughter?" he asks. The rest of the table stays silent.
"No. She's a nice girl." What the hell did she do?
"But you're not interested? She not pretty enough for you?"
"I just figured she was off limits." That's about as close to the truth as I can get.
"Well then, you let her know you're interested. I'd rather her be talking to you long distance than running around with anyone down in California."
"Okay. I'll call her." And find out exactly how she worked this out.
"And get yourself one of those computer cameras. She's got one of them."
I don't even know how to have this conversation, so I just nod and smile at every suggestion.
Thanks James Ramsey and HolletLA for betaing this.
I won't mark this as complete yet. There's a chance I'll write another chapter or two for fun.
Thanks for reading.