Team Minato had been in the middle of an ordinary day of training in which Kakashi was being his usual teenage cold and antisocial self, Rin was crushing on Kakashi, and Obito was crushing on Rin and swearing that he would defeat Kakashi one day when a swirling black vortex opened up in the sky and spat someone out.

"Well, that didn't go to plan." the horrifically scarred man with mismatched eyes who had smacked into a tree, bounced off of it, and smacked into the ground after he'd been spat out of the vortex said.

"Who are you?!" Obito yelled at the intruder despite the sinking feeling in his gut that he knew exactly who the man was, as there was only one member of the Uchiha clan who had his father's face, mother's eyes, and his paternal grandfather's hair spike pattern.

"Hmm. This could be helpful." The man said as he got up and took in his surroundings, completely ignoring Obito's question, but then again just about everybody ignored Obito when they weren't picking on him, so it was nothing new.

"I'm sorry Minato-sensei." the man said as he pulled out a Kunai and started moving towards Namikaze Minato in a threatening manner. "But, I'm afraid that I'll have to neuter you because your son keeps messing up my and Madara-sama's plans."

"Your plans?" Minato asked as he easily dodged the scarred stranger and flashed over to the seal he'd drawn on one of the surrounding trees in order to put a bit more distance between the two of them.

"Why yes, I..." the man started before he paused, reached into his cloak, and started rummaging around in it muttering "Where is it?".

A moment later, the man pulled out a swirly orange mask with only one eye hole with a victorious cry and put it on.

"Okay, now that I'm ready, let me introduce myself." the man said. "My name is Tobi, and I'm from the future, where my and Madara-sama's glorious Moon's Eye Plan has met with some difficulties that need to be corrected."

"Moon's Eye Plan?" Rin asked, half dreading the answer.

"There is a long story behind that, but basically, Madara-sama and I are seeking to recreate the Jyuubi so we can turn the Moon into a giant eye in order to create a new world with a powerful Genjutsu. A peaceful world where everyone can live happily without any need to fight." Tobi said.

"Oh my god! I become my father!" Obito wailed. "Why, why must the Gods forsake me so! I just wanted to be a regular, ordinary, run of the mill ninja! Is that too much to ask?"

Minato, Kakashi, and Rin turned to look at Obito in confusion. As far as they knew, Obito's father was one of the strictest and most straitlaced Uchiha in existence. The man they had occasionally seen picking Obito up at the Academy or during infrequent Parent-Jounin Instructor meetings would never have anything to do with something as ridiculous as "Tobi"'s Moon's Eye Plan.

"What?" Rin finally said.

"Uh, you didn't hear a thing, and I most definitely didn't say that I'll become just like my father in the future." Obito, who had quickly stopped wailing over his fate at Rin's confused "What?" said, slightly shiftily. "Me and Tobi here will just be getting back home now where we'll be having a little talk about operational sec-...er, why he thinks that he's from the future and that he has to neuter Minato-sensei."

"I don't think so." Tobi said as he moved to either fulfill his self-appointed task or to leave the clearing altogether, only to be stopped when Obito hit him with a strange looking orb that quickly turned into a net of light which surrounded Tobi, sunk in, and vanished.

"You didn't see that either." Obito said nervously. "Me and Tobi here will just be getting home now."

Obito then left the training grounds with a struggling Tobi being dragged behind him.

"What just happened?" Rin said.

"Don't know, don't wanna know." Kakashi replied.

After a walk during which a number of villagers had stopped to stare at the struggling man in a mask who was leaving a trench of fingermarks into the road behind him, he made his way to the arcade that was located on the edge of the neighborhood in which the Uchiha family had made their home since the founding of Konoha. Once inside, he made a beeline for the Pac-man Eats the Universe game at the back and inserted a special token before pressing the coin-return button in a specific pattern.

"The duck quacks at midnight." the video game said rather than playing the usual annoying electronic music that came with the start screen, giving him the first phrase of his password. A password that was unfortunately randomly assigned rather than personally selected.

"Then I shall bring the monkey to the clock tower." Obito muttered before giving a put upon sigh.

"The peanut-butter and turkey sandwich is not on the menu." the electronic voice said.

"Then fly! Fly North and do not stop for bacon!" Tobi exclaimed enthusiastically before giving a maniacal laugh.

"Welcome Uchiha Obito, Clan Registration Number 24647." the electronic voice said a second before the seal based illusion that surrounded the Uchiha neighborhood was dropped for him and his companion who undoubtedly registered to the system as him as well, revealing the true face of the clan that none but members of the clan and a select few thoroughly vetted outsiders were allowed to see.

Rather than being the quiet, almost sleepy place that was peopled by a number of strict and straitlaced individuals who possessed varying amounts of arrogance that the rest of the village saw when they bothered to look, the place was just about as chaotic as one would expect a place where more than three-hundred separate World Domination plots that had been created by lunatics were running simultaneously would be. The Uchiha praised individual initiative just so long as one conformed to the overall Uchiha ideal. Obito, who didn't have his Sharingan yet, and whose only goals in life were to be an ordinary, run of the mill, only slightly insane Konoha ninja who didn't try to take over the world, to settle down with Rin, and to start a Outsider Normal family most definitely did not fit in with the rest of his clan.

As he made his way home with his future counterpart whose normal behavior might finally get the clan off his back in tow, Obito did his best to ignore the intercontinental ballistic missile that Shisui was helping Itachi build in the workyard outside of the Uchiha Senbei shop and Munitions Depot. The last time he'd gotten roped into helping out with one of Itachi's art projects, he'd turned up five hours late for a mission. He sucked at missile building, which was embarrassing, since it was pretty much considered to be a kiddie project by the clan. At the door to the Senbei shop, Uruichi, the shop owner's wife, was handing out free Senbei to a gaggle of identical pale black-haired, yellow-eyed children.

"Aren't they adorable? I've got the original back in my lab, so I can run off a few copies for you if you want." the distant cousin of his to whom the children belonged said. "The Hokage never noticed when I switched his out with a defective one."

Ignoring Tobi's exclamation of "So, that's what was wrong with him.", he continued on his way, not even acknowledging his relatives as he passed. After ignoring any number of relatives whom he knew would just criticize him for his lack of a Sharingan and lack of a World Domination plot while he made his way to his family home which was located at the outskirts of the neighborhood, he finally stopped to say hi to a masked man who was standing at the edge of a pit, preparing an explosive tag with a one-minute timer. If he didn't say hi to this one particular relative, he would never hear the end of it at dinner.

"When the world is remade through my Core of the Earth Plan, everything shall be perfect!" the masked man exclaimed as he dropped the primed explosive seal into the seemingly bottomless pit that his cousins had disguised as a pond.

"I'll let mom know that you'll be late for dinner." Obito called out to his father who was trying to dig to the core of the earth to set off earthquakes that would somehow cause a continent to rise from the ocean which his father would then claim for his own and use as a base from which to conquer the world, or something like that. He'd quit paying attention to what his father was doing when he was six.

"You do that." his father said as he measured the current depth of the hole he'd been digging since he was five.

When he got home, it was to find that his mother was still teaching her minions, most of whom were staring at her and drooling rather than obsessively practicing Taijutsu like they should have been. Personally, he thought the green spandex leotard with orange leg-warmers that was her official uniform was an eyesore, but his mother and that little Outsider minion of hers swore by it. He still didn't know how she was supposed to conquer the world with the "Flames of Youth", especially now that she was approaching middle-age though.

"And to think me and Itachi killed them all." Tobi said with a sniff as he took in his final view of the neighborhood with an air of nostalgia before he was dragged into the house.

"So, what are we going to do tonight Kagami?" the one-eyed member of the Hokage's advisory council asked the middle-aged Uchiha he was standing next to amongst the ranks of Uchiha Haruko's "minions".

"Same thing we do every night Danzo, try to take over the world!"

&!&!&!&

OMAKE:

Why it took the Uchiha Clan more than eight years to get their coup planning off the ground.

It was now several years after the Kyuubi attack. Shortly after the attack, the Uchiha clan's old neighborhood had been destroyed, and all of their weapons of mass destruction had been confiscated before they had been moved into the high security "Uchiha district". Naturally, they decided to get their revenge by taking over the village and ruling it with an iron fist...

"I still say that we should get our seal masters to build a giant robot." one of the clan elders said.

"And, I say that we should drug the water supply with my mind control powder!" Uchiha Uruichi said, countering the elder's plan.

"I say screw Konoha, let's go with my Core of the Earth Plan and bomb the place from our new continent." one of the other Uchiha yelled.

"That's a dumb idea!" a Uchiha woman yelled. "If you'd even bothered to pay attention in science class you'd know why. I say that we kill all of the villagers and replace them with mindless clones."

Fugaku, groaned and slammed his head against the nearest wall, not that anyone noticed, because they were all intently focused on the discussion at hand. With all of the arguing over the general planning that was going on, the coup he'd been planning so he could use Konoha as his base of operations for world conquest since he was six would never happen at this rate.