Of Prophecies and Ramen

Chapter One

S.P.T. to A.P.W.B.D.

Dark Lord

And (?) Harry Potter

Harry stared at the rows and rows of glowing white orbs, his eyes fixated on the one with his name on it. Without realising it, he felt his hand rise and reach out to the orb. It was like the glowing bulb was calling to him, as strange as it sounded.

"HARRY! Hurry up!"

The sudden shout caused Harry to jolt, his hand missing the prophecy with his name on it and falling onto the globe next to it. His eyes widening in shock, Harry stared dumbly at the prophecy in front of him that he had just unwittingly picked up.

Unknown to unknown

'The Child of the Prophecy'

"Hand it over, Potter," a voice came from in front of Harry.

Harry's head snapped up, catching sight of Lucius Malfoy approaching menacingly, his wand pointed in threat at Harry. He was flanked by over ten Death Eaters, the most notable being a grinning Bellatrix Lestrange.

It would have been smarter for Harry to just hand over the prophecy, he realised later. It wasn't of any interest to them, unlike the one with his name on it, and Harry doubted that they were after the 'Child of the Prophecy', whoever that was. But Harry had been conditioned his entire life to never give a Death Eater what they asked for. It was an automatic response.

Harry pulled the prophecy closer to him and drew his wand.

"Not on my life," he answered with resolution. Harry then muttered to his companions, "on my signal..."

"Don't make this difficult, Potter," Malfoy commanded.

Harry couldn't help the smirk that came to his lips.

"It's in my nature," he replied before raising his voice to a shout. "NOW!"

With the synchronisation that they only managed to perfect through practice, Harry and his five companions brought six large, sweeping reductos down onto the shelves.

And then, they ran.

Harry's mind started to whir as he charged down the pathway, unaware of who was following them, prophecies falling left, right and centre. Obviously, this was a trap, but they were outnumbered two-to-one. Those odds would have been hard to work with even if the difference of skill wasn't so great, but Harry was pitifully aware of the difference that experience could make.

Instinct was the only thing that got Harry down that corridor, dodging curses without even thinking about it. It's just a game of quiditch, Harry was chanting to himself, just dodge the really fast, multi-coloured, death-bearing bludgers…

Something grabbed Harry's hand, and the dark-haired teen glanced back long enough to see the face of Nott Sr before he was struck with a red beam of light. Pushing the now stunned Nott off himself, and watching him be crushed by falling shelves, Harry muttered a thanks to Hermione as they continued to run.

One down. Eleven to go.

A glance behind them allowed Harry to realise that they had a pair of Death Eaters hot on their tails. Harry hastily threw a curse behind himself, missing by large margins and smashing yet again into the shelves.

In front of him, Harry caught sight of a door. Yes! He cheered, somewhere to hide!

Harry charged towards the door, hurriedly ducking in the room, followed by Hermione and Neville and rushed to seal the door shut.

It was then that Harry looked around the group.

"Where – where are the others?" asked Harry. He'd assumed that Ron, Luna and Ginny were ahead of them, waiting in the room for them, but the room was empty.

"They must have gone the wrong way!" Hermione whispered, terrified.

"Listen!" whispered Neville.

Harry and Hermione were silent and Harry pressed his ear against the door. He could hear footsteps and shouts and Malfoy declare that his friends were expendable. Cold fury mixed with terror boiled up inside Harry. He couldn't, he refused, to let his friends die because of him.

"What do we do?" Hermione asked Harry desperately, trying to keep a lid on her terror, but failing.

Harry could see that she was scared. Harry understood, but they had to sort out their priorities, and comforting Hermione would only waste time.

Already, Harry could feel the familiar sensation of adrenaline seeping into his system, his head clearing as it did.

"We move," he answered. "Moving targets are harder to hit than sitting ducks."

With that, he pulled Hermione off the floor where she had collapsed and the three of them began to run. They fled past the shimmering bell jar where a tiny egg lay hatching and unhatching, past many shelves and towards the exit. They had almost reached it when Harry heard something large and heavy collide with the door they had charmed shut.

"It's not going to hold," Hermione whispered heavily.

"ALOHOMORA!"

With a shout, the door crashed open and Harry threw himself into his two friends, pushing them all under one of the large desks. Harry clasped his hand over Hermione's mouth as she moved to scream, watching the bottom of the two Death Eaters' robes as they drew nearer.

They had little to no advantages, Harry realised, except the most basic one: surprise.

"They might have run straight through to the hall," one of the Death Eaters suggested. Harry placed it as the one to his left.

"Check under the desks," his partner commanded gruffly.

Harry panicked. His one advantage was almost gone. They had to act – now!

The knees of the Death Eater bent. Harry readied his wand and, with as much energy as he could muster, he shouted, "STUPEFY!"

Harry's spell took out the first Death Eater, sending him spiralling backwards into a grandfather clock, smashing it to pieces, but the second still remained, having dodged, and was now aiming his own wand at Hermione, who was crawling out from under the desk to get a better aim.

Harry heard the first few syllables form on the Death Eater's lips.

"Avada –"

Harry acted on instinct, launching himself across the floor and grabbing the Death Eater around the knees, tackling him to the floor. Neville overturned a desk in his anxiety to help and, pointing his wand wildly at the struggling pair, he cried:

"EXPELLIARMUS!"

Harry felt his wand leave his hand and immediately scrambled to his feet to retrieve it. Unfortunately, the same had happened to the Death Eater, and the pair of them were promptly engaged in a race to get to the wands.

"Dodge!" that was all the warning Harry got of what Neville was going to do.

Placing his entire trust in Neville, Harry flung himself sideways just in time to hear Neville shout:

"STUPEFY!"

The red beam of light narrowly missed the Death Eater, brushing past his cloak before hitting a glass cabinet and causing it to collapse in on itself, then repair itself continuously. Harry could only watch in horror as the Death Eater snatched his wand back up, throwing himself at Neville and pulling them behind a desk.

The Death Eater readied a spell: "STUP—"

"STUPEFY!"

Harry grinned, recognising that voice. It was Hermione. And Hermione never missed. Pulling himself up from behind the desk, Harry caught sight of the Death Eater as he froze and fell back into the bell jar, his head sinking into the eerie green liquid.

"Accio wand!" cried Hermione, deftly catching Harry's wand and throwing it to him.

Harry grinned. The adrenaline had finally set in for Hermione, then. This was no longer the terrified school girl Harry was looking at, this was Hermione Granger, a Gryffindor.

"Thanks," Harry said. "Right, let's move –"

"Holy hell," Neville breathed.

Hermione and Harry both whirled around to see what Neville was staring at and found themselves uncontrollably repulsed.

The Death Eater's head was shrinking very fast, growing balder and balder, the black hair and stubble retracting into his skull; his cheeks becoming smooth, his skull round and covered with a peachlike fuzz…

A baby's head now sat grotesquely on top of the thick, msucled body of the Death Eater as he struggled to get up again; but even as they watched, their mouths open in a mixture of horror and fascination, the head began to swell to its previous proportions; thick black hair was sprouting from the pate and chin…

"It's Time," Hermione whispered. "Time… We're in the Hall of Time…"

Harry, Hermione and Neville continued to stare, dumbstruck, until the sound of a shout and scream from a nearby room called them out of their stupor.

"The others!" Neville realised with an exclamation.

Throwing one last look at the aging and de-aging man, the three charged out of the room, in time to hear approaching footsteps from the Hall of Prophecies.

Three Down. Nine to go.

Harry, Hermione and Neville ran towards the open door at the end of the room, making it halfway there before Harry spotted more Death Eaters running at them. Harry thought on his feet, veering left and throwing himself and his companions into an office and slamming the door behind them.

"Colllo—" began Hermione, but before she could complete the spell, the door was thrown open…

Naruto cracked an eye open, wondering if the events of yesterday were all a dream. He looked around himself, noting the unfamiliar surroundings and then it hit him: Konoha had been destroyed. And he'd… he'd saved everyone.

Naruto smiled. He'd finally gotten them to respect him.

Naruto stretched his arms out, not yet fully awake and moved to find himself some ramen. Today was going to be a good day.

If only he knew…

Neville was being tortured, Harry realised numbly. His friends were being hurt because he was clinging to a prophecy. Harry looked between Neville and the prophecy. He had no choice.

"We both know you're not stupid, Harry," Malfoy whispered. "Come now, make the right choice."

Harry reached out with his left hand, preparing to give the prophecy to Malfoy. He could practically feel the man smirking…

Suddenly, the door opened above them and five people sprinted into the room: Sirius, Lupin, Moody, Tonks and Kingsley.

It was then that Harry's more rebellious instinct kicked in. Rule number one, Harry remembered, when a Death Eater asks for something, do the opposite.

It was Harry's turn to smirk.

"We can't always get what we want," Harry said before throwing the prophecy to the ground…


Uzumaki Naruto would be the first to admit that his life was anything but normal. He'd seen people come back to life, a powerful warrior knocked out by a variation of Henge and had trained under toads. So, when he began to feel a weird spinning sensation whilst making his breakfast, he put it down to the fox trying something with the seal.

Normally, he'd be somewhat panicked, but today, Naruto thought he deserved a break.

He realised, when he began to feel like he was being pulled into his belly-button, that this was most definitely not normal, but by then it was too late. Uzumaki Naruto disappeared from Konoha in a puff of smoke.


The prophecy exploded, throwing shards of glass everywhere. Smoke erupted out of the wreckage and Harry couldn't help but grin. That was a useful distraction.

And like that, the battle began.


Like it had been said before, Uzumaki Naruto's life was anything but normal. However, the blond admitted, this most definitely won as his most abnormal experience.

As the smoke cleared, Naruto's surroundings came into view.

His pot of instant ramen still in his hand, Naruto watched the scene before him, bemused.

Right, on their side, we have cloak wearing soldiers – possibly a variant of Akatsuki – using sticks as weapons – well I have seen stranger – and shooting weird, possibly harmful beams of light at each other, Naruto calculated. And on my side, we have me, not even fully dressed or breakfasted…

Naruto shrugged. Probably better to stay out of it for now…

Digging in the pockets of his trousers, Naruto found his spare pair of chopsticks that he always kept on him and grinned, splitting them apart and preparing to dig into his meal.

Ah, yes, sweet ramen… Naruto thought in bliss, reaching for another mouthful. Until…

One of those funny beams of light hit Naruto's ramen pot, causing it to explode into his face.

Cold fury boiled up in Naruto. He did not just hit the ramen!

But, the dripping noodles covering his face and hair told him otherwise. Naruto shook his head. They would pay for this…

Forming his favourite handseal, Naruto cried, "Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"


Harry paused in his battle when nearly a thousand blond clones filled the area.

Suddenly, a hand was tugging on his wrist. He spun around. It was Tonks.

"Come on, Harry, let's move," she stated. "We'll use the pandemonium as cover."

Harry nodded. "Wait," he said. "What about the others?"

"Kingsley's taking care of it," Tonks reassured Harry.

Harry nodded dumbly, as Tonks checked behind them and began to move them to the door.

That was when Tonks caught sight of it.

"Dumbledore," she breathed in relief.

Harry stumbled for words for a second.

"Dumbledore?" he asked. Tonks nodded.

Relief coursed through his bones. Dumbledore was here. They were saved.

It seemed effortless, the way Dumbledore ploughed through the Death Eaters like they were cannon fodder. Harry wanted to stay and watch, but Tonks pulled his hand back and was leading him through the door, when—

He saw it. Bellatrix and Sirius. Bellatrix, with her wand still poised, and Sirius, the life slowly draining from his face. And back he fell, through the whispy curtains of the veil.

Harry couldn't help it.

He let out an anguished cry of grief:

"SIRIUS!"


Naruto paused when he heard that name. In fact, all three hundred of him that were left paused, causing half of them to be dispelled by the old man's beams of light.

That, Naruto realised, was a cry of outright grief and anger. It was the cry of someone who'd just lost the one thing they had…

And Naruto hated that he had to see it on another person. And so, Naruto moved to the person who shouted, not knowing what he could do, but knowing he had to do something.

Harry broke free of Tonks' grip and before he knew it, he was running after Bellatrix, blind rage clouding his vision.

Tonks, struck dumb by her cousin's death, wanted to go after him, but, frozen in shock, she could only watch as Harry charged out of the room.

That was why it was only Tonks who saw a blond blur dash after him.

"Aaaah … did you love him, little baby Potter?"

Harry could hear Bellatrix's voice. He hated it. He hated her. Hate, hate, HATE!

Harry brought his wand into the air, that hate controlling his thoughts. Unbidden, the spell came to his lips—

"Cru—"

Something collided with him, knocking him to the ground. Looking up, Harry saw a blond teen, his age, standing between him and Bellatrix. Wait, no, there were two of him… Was Harry hallucinating?

"Oh?" Bellatrix said, tilting her head to the side in false interest. "A newcomer? Shame, you're kinda cute."

The blond muttered a few words in a language Harry didn't know, before holding his right hand out.

The blond said one word, his voice deathly calm, before charging at Bellatrix.

"Rasengan."

A glowing blue orb of ever changing light formed in the blond's hand and as he brought it crashing down onto Bellatrix's form with inhuman speed, it was only pure luck that allowed her to dodge.

The blond's fist crashed through a wall behind her, causing chunks of rubble to fly through the air.

Bellatrix felt her eyes widen. Such power… His Lordship would be interested in it for sure. Bellatrix threw the first non-lethal curse she knew at the blond, determined to capture him.

Petrificus totalis! she thought, silently sending the curse his way.

It caught the blond straight on, hitting him square in the chest. The blond went rigid, freezing in place and crashing to the ground. Bellatrix grinned manically before turning to Potter. She would be rewarded greatly for this.


Harry watched the blond fall to the floor, Bellatrix smirking all the while.

The blond had quite literally just punched through a wall… If that attack had actually hit…

"So, Potter, where were we?" Bellatrix asked, blowing a lock of hair out of her face. "Oh yes," she said. "Give me the prophecy."

Harry stared at her.

"I don't have it," he answered truthfully, his revenge momentarily forgotten, before pulling out his wand and, as if remembering that he was supposed to be fighting here, threw a stupefy at Bellatrix.

Bellatrix waved it off like it was nothing.

"Potter," she said coldly, "I'm giving you one last chance! Give me the prophecy – roll it towards me now – and I might spare your life!"

"Well," Harry said, his voice reaching an icy low, "you're just going to have to kill me. I smashed it, Bellatrix, right back there in the chamber."

Bellatrix paused, fear forming on her face for the first time.

"You're lying," she whispered harshly, before screaming, "YOU'RE LYING!"

Harry's scar began to burn, but he ignored it, settling for a low laugh.

"There is no prophecy, Bellatrix. It's gone, smashed, broken…"

"LIAR!" Bellatrix shrieked. "YOU'VE GOT IT, YOU'RE LYING! GIVE IT TO ME! ACCIO PROPHECY!"

Nothing happened.

The pain in Harry's skull reached new levels, but he paid it no heed, continuing his maniacal laugh.

"Nothing to summon, is there, Bellatrix?"

"No!" she screamed. "It isn't true, you're lying! MASTER, I TRIED, I TRIED – DO NOT PUNISH ME –"

"Don't waste your breath," Harry told her softly. "He can't hear you, Bellatrix."

"Can't I Potter?" said a high, cold voice. It sounded almost … amused.

Standing a few feet in front of them was a snake-like man, dressed exclusively in black, an evil smirk on his face. He was pointing his wand at Harry, who stood, frozen, quite unable to move.

"So you smashed my proph—" Voldemort began, only to be cut off by a shout, full of anger, pain and hatred.

"OROCHIMARU!"


AN: Well, here's another new story. Aren't you guys lucky?

Anyway, here's a preview of the next chapter:


Naruto felt his body shut down. He could quite literally not move a muscle. Hm… Naruto thought. Paralysis? Nah, the fox would neutralise it… Genjutsu? Naruto disrupted his chakra network. That didn't work…

Well, Naruto thought, since I can't move…

Naruto closed his eyes and began to gather nature energy…


Well, I hope you guys liked it.

Leave a review,

-FriedIce