This is just something that has been festering a little while; this and Father's Pride are consolation for my lack of Updates from ENOIS, Knots, and Violet Insanity; school has been keeping me on my toes and these were almost finished; I hope you don't mind- I apply for university next month.
Summary: Sequel to 'Ligers cannot breed' how could he decide between having a child with his only love and having a child that was only half theirs? Would you choose a taboo method of conception or exile yourself to a life without the unconditional love of a child?
He hated watching it really, watching as Tsuna slumped down in his desk chair. The boss has just had another, rather devastating, meeting with his external advisors, CEDEF and Reborn, and as usual- as the case could be found over the past three months- Tsuna was left on the verge of flames and tears as he left the meeting.
As usual, none of the guardians approached, knowing through experience that their boss needed time to think, time to calm down, and private time to cry about something that was so important to him.
As a member of Vongola, her found it annoying that the boss would break and crush so easily. It was disgusting, how fragile the boss was, even after eleven years in the throne. A mantle that he has wanted early on in his life. He was even more disgusted when he thought about the reason his boss was so upset; the brat argued every week about the decision because of him.
As a man, he understood. Because this was something everyman was suppose to look forward to; and to have the decision pushed on to him, well it was detestable, but they were both bosses and he understood why the advisors were pushing the subject; after all, Tsunayoshi was the only one not expecting the questioned outcome yet.
But as a lover, Xanxus was furious. He could not give Tsuna what he needed, and Tsuna could not give Xanxus everything he had ever wanted; even if it was buried deep down. This entire process hurt them both, because it was painful to think of everything they had been through; enemies, boss-subordinate, advisor, lover, now something so simply was driving Tsuna to the edge; and it killed Xanxus that he couldn't seem to help it.
"Tsunayoshi." his harsh voice washed the room, because he was the only one allowed in the office after one of these meetings, the only one who Tsuna allowed to see him so weak, and angry, and tied. Xanxus, he knew, was the only one who would not take advantage or give him pity. Xanxus, he knew, would give him exactly what he needed. "What was it this time?"
"Same as usual. IVF, surrogate, adoption is out of the question. We didn't even talk about what I wanted to do. They don't want to try; don't want such a monster over their head."
Xanxus was very quiet for a while, because he may be furious at the advisors, but he was even more angered at Reborn, the fucking bastard was Tsuna's advisor, his ex-tutor. It is fair to say that Xanxus expected far more from the Arcobaleno, because the man had earned his respect, and he was now slowly loosing it as the fucking bastard let his student break and crumble slowly in his grasp.
The door was knocked and crept open expectantly. It was a low, dull, but comfortable sound that made both Tsuna and Xanxus look up with softened smiled and warm eyes.
"Ungle 'suna?" a small voice crept around the door. Flashing silver hair met the two men and eyed the colour of garnet were peeking around the door.
"What is it, Amelia?" Tsuna's voice was drowned in warmth suddenly. The young girl, she had just turned four, walked in with a small baby sat snugly in her arms. The child was only about one and had a head of the brightest blonde hair, eyes that were warm, but coloured brown with lighter hints within.
Amelia was Hayato's oldest daughter; he also had a six-month-old son named Antonio.
"Papa was worried about you, so I decided to bring Hikari to com see you." Amelia's speak was well punctuated and articulated, which wasn't surprising considering who her father was.
"Hayato's worried huh? I suppose Takeshi is too?" Tsuna asked as Hikari got closer in Amelia's arms.
Hikari was Ryohei and Hana's child.
Amelia looked on at the loving Hikari was getting and pouted and walked over to Xanxus who was leaning against the fireplace opposite Tsuna. She smiled up at the strong, warm, aggressive man with a loving smile that never failed to flare protective instincts and love in Xanxus' core.
"Mornin' ungle Xanxus." With an indulgent smile, Xanxus lifted the light girl into his arms where she quickly snuggled into his chest and breathed in the smell of whiskey and wood and gun powder.
Instinctively he started swaying to sooth the girl, who like her father, doted on her 'Uncle Tsuna' and was very aware of emotions, unlike her father. As he swayed he thought back over the past years, when these angels entered their lives.
It wasn't long ago that all the other guardians started having children, and some of them ended up with people no one expected.
Hayato and Takeshi's relationship started to dissolver soon after becoming full-time guardians, and while it was sad, they both found new people, and funnily enough, Hayato found that company in an ex-maid of the mansion.
Takeshi found his comfort in Hibari, and the two of them had a boy and a girl who were born from surrogates, the girl was five- Kayla- and the boy had just turned one – Tsuyoshi after Takeshi's father- they were all living well, and despite the past no one was holding grudges, after all they were all happy once again.
Obviously Hana and Ryohei were doing well, they had three children, the oldest was seven, she was Sakura, they had Hikari, and they also had a two year old boy names Vincent. They were all rambunctious and often were found playing with Kyoko and Haru's children in the mansion's orphan's wing.
Mukuro adopted children, he never really settled down, though, after he lost his partner to an accident with another famiglia- leaving him and his three month old son, Alexander, alone- almost five years ago Tsuna didn't blame him. Since the accident he had adopted two daughters and another son from the Vongola orphanage when he found they were saved from a situation eerily similar to his own. Tanya and Elexi were twin girls of nine, and Dakota was twelve when he was adopted. They made a warm, gentle family, but Mukuro often lent on Tsuna for help with the more emotional side of it; Mukuro never got over the loss of his wife and hadn't looked for another since.
Chrome was a beautiful story really. She had met a young man from Dino's family- Dylan by name and known as 'ice-breath Holland' in the Mafia world- he was loud and brash, but was ever so gentle and kind. He never questioned her about her illness, or her fragility, and when she finally told him the truth about her past he smiled, kissed her warmly and held her so protectively and understandingly that Tsuna almost broke down with relief that Chrome had found someone. They fell in love quickly, but were careful, he courted her for three years before he asked Tsuna and Mukuro- he would have asked all the guardians if Tsuna and Mukuro didn't assure him that their answers would be the same- for her hand in marriage. By the following fall they were married in Vongola's Grande hall. That was three years ago now, and finally Chrome conceived their first child, her health and the damage to her organs made it difficult. The surprise was that they were expecting twins; but Chrome would not tell the family what they were. She was due in three months.
Lambo was another sweet tale. He had calmed over the past years and was currently dating a wonderfully shy and kind girl from Enma's ever-growing famiglia. They hadn't been dating long, but they looked the same as Chrome and her husband, and everyone was sure they would be married soon-enough.
So all in all, the Vongola was becoming a large, warm, touching family. But Tsuna was the only one left without child or heir, especially when he wanted a child with Xanxus. Xanxus watched on, Amelia resting perfectly contented in his arms, as Tsuna played and cuddled and soothed Hikari, the boy was fussy and often had separation anxiety from his mother and father.
Wasn't it a travesty? Xanxus could see it, see when Tsuna picked the baby from the child's arms, how good Tsuna was with children, how right it was for him to be around them, how capable he was of raising and protecting them, and how tragic was it, that the one thing he wanted to give Tsuna with all his heart and soul, he couldn't give him.
"Tell your papa and uncles and aunts that I'll be out soon enough. I just need to talk to Xanxus." Tsuna's smile was enough to fool the children who smiled warmly and left, but Xanxus could see the pain and agony.
"Tsuna," Xanxus began. Tsuna was looking forlorn towards the door, he hated how his guardians were moving on; he hated how stubborn he was on the topic.
"Xanxus, I hate this. I hate this so much." Tsuna collapsed into himself, because it hurt so much to even think about it. "I want children so much, but I want your children, I want mine!" Tsuna huffed, "Why do I need an heir now? I'm not about to die off!" Tsuna's eyes were angry, he didn't understand, and with tears lacing his hues of orange and brown, Xanxus could only move up and embrace the man he respected, hated, and loved with everything in his body.
"You might die, Tsunayoshi." His voice was not mocking, or joking, but loving and serious. "Look at your fucking-mist's wife. She was only twenty-one. You can die at any time." He continued.
Tsuna folded even more, taking his eyes from Xanxus' because he knows his love is right. "I know..."
"Vongola has no one left, Tsunayoshi. You are the only one left, and they are scared to lose the best fucking thing that ever happened to them and have to resort to finding an inexistent new heir." Xanxus' words were sincere and tense. He hated it too; because he can't ease their worries by behind the last resort. Not the traitor of Vongola who had yet to redeem himself.
"I guess we're just going to have to convince Verde and Shamal to try." Tsuna folded. Xanxus walked forward and embraced Tsuna, because they wanted a child, with the whole of their hearts, but they wanted it when they wanted it, this was a forced hand that the Mafia demanded. They demanded an heir, and they demanded it now.
"It'll be alright, Tsunayoshi."
Tsuna just clung harder to Xanxus' bulk, because he was Tsuna's rock, and Tsuna never felt safer than in Xanxus' arms.
Xanxus arranged the meeting for the following afternoon. It would be only the five of them; Xanxus, Tsuna, Reborn, Shamal and Verde. Because this was a private affair that didn't need to be announced to the entire fucking family.
When the discussion had peaked and cooled, Tsuna sitting disgruntled and teary after a rather harsh blow from Reborn, Xanxus watched on with interested, annoyed airs. He was interested though, because soon enough the almighty Hitman lent back in his seat and sighed- one filled with the emotion Xanxus explicitly remembered seeing when he was confronted with after his announcement of claim over the little Boss.
"Are you sure about this, Dame-Tsuna?" Xanxus' fists clenched when the brat's ex-tutor now advisor spoke that name. He knew as well as anyone that it hurt Tsuna to be called by something he had long surpassed. But Xanxus made no move to comment, this was a discussion between Tsuna and his advisors.
"Yes. Xanxus and I want an heir, and we are willing to try this method." Tsuna explained. He had decided it years ago, but he needed to try every other alternative before he subjected his child to such possible ridicule in the future.
"You know what the chances of surv-"
Xanxus cut the droning scientist of with a slam of a fist to the table. "We know the risks this procedure holds for our child, but this machine, this artificial womb is the only chance we have left." Xanxus seethed. He left no choice for the other men in the room. So when they all nodded and left Tsuna alone with Xanxus they could only sigh and pray that everything would turn out ok.
"Are we doing the right thing?" Tsuna begged.
"We can only try and hope it is, fucking trash."
Soon enough their seed had been collected stored on ice and handed rather coolly off to Verde and Shamal. They knew very little about what would happen, because the scientists had decided that Tsuna didn't need the stresses of knowing every detail and that they didn't need to death threat of Xanxus knowing.
Months later Verde appeared in Tsuna's office with something that looked suspiciously like an ultrasound. There were four images, all of something that Xanxus would assume to be a kidney bean had he not been as well educated as he was.
When Tsuna started crying, tears welling up and out of his eyes with some undefined emotion Xanxus smiled and held him close to his chest. It was only after the scientist had smiled softly at the scene, and whispered a quick farewell before Xanxus let his own tears spill. "Congratulations."
Over the course of the next eight months the couple celebrated, the first night was how and steamy. They were both filled with such lust and such uncontrolled passion that it overflowed onto Tsuna's desk before making it to their master bedroom hours later.
They would feel high on the feeling for weeks, and people- guardians and maids alike- would know to avoid Tsuna and Xanxus' bedroom at all costs during all times of the day. Because the last person to invade on their 'alone' time had a $2,000 whiskey bottle thrown at their head followed by a flaming ball of flames that no one could positively identify as the flames of rage.
Every few months, and later every few weeks, the couple was updated with ultrasounds. Each image brought tears to Tsuna's eyes, and each time Xanxus would pull Tsuna close and kiss him so deeply that love overflowed and made his scars move with a gentle wave across his skin as it heated with love and appreciation and gratitude.
The only time Xanxus was not there for an update on their child's progress was when Tsuna met Verde and Shamal in that private hospital room for a check on the baby's gender. It wasn't s much that Xanxus didn't want to know, it was that Tsuna didn't want him to know. After all, if Xanxus was the dominant, it was only right that Tsuna be the only one to know the baby's gender.
As nine months rolled around, Tsuna grew ever anxious. If things were going to go wrong it was now. If they were going to lose their beautiful baby it was now. If they were going to lose every last hope of having a child together it was now.
Soon enough Tsuna had to take what was being affectionately known as 'maternity' leave from work as the anxiety cause him to lose sleep and condition, and it wasn't until August 28th that the stress finally snapped with a loud, shrill cry across the entire mention. The call that only five people understood the meaning of.
And even before the alarm had finished, four of those five people were in the room that had strict rules on who entered, and those who broke those rules were subjected to severe punishment.
It had been hours. The alarm had sounded just before ten o'clock, and now dawn was approaching. It worried Xanxus. There had been complications all along, since they first started hearing the fetus' hear beat. Verde and Shamal were worried from the get-go. But they said little to ensure Tsuna didn't worry. Xanxus almost wished they had said more. That way both he and Tsuna would have been prepared for this.
Tsuna walked out then, because Xanxus would never admit it, but he was terrified of what was about to happen. When Tsuna had rushed into the room with a deep kiss, warm, caring, beautiful eyes, Xanxus started thinking about everything he never thought he would be able to think about.
Would he be a good enough father for this child?
He could not enter the room where his child was being born, he could not watch something that was not Tsuna nor himself birth what was entirely theirs. He couldn't watch and know that the future would bear great consequence. They were doing something taboo, they were doing something nature never intended; all because they wanted something nature demanded. They only wanted a family that was entirely theirs and fate or God or some god-forsaken-puppet-master was trying to deny them that.
Oh the rumours would protect them, the rumors of Tsuna's guardian carrying his child for him, or a concubine bearing an illegitimate child for the Vongola boss who would not keep it in his pants, of the child being born from IVF of a partner Tsuna kept secure for exactly this purpose. Oh they would be protected, but their child? No, their child would be criticised because Tsuna fell in love with Xanxus, because Tsuna was a man, and the most wonderful, caring, beautiful man Xanxus had ever know.
Because he was a liger and Tsuna was the most beautiful creature Xanxus had ever laid eyes on.
Soon enough large, wooden, solid doors swung open to Tsuna crying and carrying a bundled package. The blankets were the softest colour of orange, and Xanxus, for once, wondered how they –Tsuna and him, him and Tsuna- were so blessed.
"Xanxus, say hello to our son, Stephanus." Tsuna's voice was filled with a deep, happy, overwhelming emotion. His tone was loving and thick, and Xanxus walked forward quickly to embrace Tsuna and kiss away the tears over whelming.
"Our... son?" Xanxus was almost overwhelmed, because he and Tsuna had decided to keep the gender a secret, and all of a sudden, Xanxus hoped he would be half the father Timotei had been to him when he was alive.
Tsuna only smiled, eyes flickering orange and brown with a resolve of protection and love. He handed Xanxus the bundle of shifting material. When it was settled, perfectly fitting in the crook of Xanxus' arm. Tsuna marvelled for a moment, because Xanxus was completely off guard, he was simply staring into the sleeping face of his child, awed, and beautiful. Tsuna had never seen something so breathtaking before. Tears cascaded uncontrollably from his eyes, because despite Xanxus' unawareness, as soon as his child had been placed in his arm the guards were up instantly, surrounding the family of three from the outsiders; and Tsuna knew then that they would make this happen.
As if sensing the shift in presences, the baby opened his eyes to look into the face of his second father, and what a beautiful sight it was for Xanxus. Skin an alabaster that hinted just this side of purple-red, and limbs weak and vulnerable. Dotted upon the child were marks that Xanxus recognised as the scars he bore upon his own skin; his immediate reaction was that his mistake had scared his child, his mistake had translated somehow to his genes and to his baby, but on the baby, so innocent and pure, the scars were different. In a way he could not describe.
It wasn't the part of the baby, his hair so black and thick that Xanxus was surprised, that was like him that awed Xanxus, but the part of the baby that was solely Tsunayoshi. The roundness to his from, and the eyes that glowed with a warmth of brown that even hot-chocolate found hard to mimic sparked with lines of gold and orange and Xanxus knew, right then, that this child was going to be like his father; and that he was going to be as strong and wise and beautiful as both of them.
Tsuna felt the tension in Xanxus' shoulders when the Varia leader embraced him, he felt the protective instinct and the true, and utter, beautiful strength in the way Xanxus held his son and Tsuna in his scarred arms. Tsuna felt the wetness on his shoulder and his cheek. But he would never cut Xanxus in such a deep and intimate way by mentioning how happy he was.
"Thank you, Tsunayoshi, thank you
Because Xanxus only ever wanted a family, and Tsunayoshi had given him that and so much more than he ever thought he would deserve.
There's a bunch of shipping in this, and while I don't agree or disagree with it I just went with some new pairings and gut feelings. In the end it was concentrating on Xanxus x Tsuna, not on Tsuna's guardians.
... I was so tempted for Tsuna and Xanxus to have a girl... how cute would that have been!? Over-Protective!DaddyXanxus! *fangirl squeal and freak out*
Of well, tell me what you think, this hit me, I really wanted to expand on Ligers cannot breed.
Thanks for reading!