Author's Note: If you're wondering why I wrote this, let alone publis hit... The answer is simple. I was bored.
Fate blinked. Then he looked at the small, white cylinder in his hands. "Okay. Now I understand why Dynamis always seems to be on such a good mood..."
"Why don't you do what I tell you to?" Chigusa hissed. "I told you to petrify the fighters!"
"No. You told me to stone them, and I did exactly that." Fate replied.
"They're all high!" The eastern mage yelled.
"Whatever, I'll work with it." Chigusa said, shrugging.
"Dats not thru its bulshit I did not hit her I did not!" Setsuna ranted. "O Hai Tsukuyomi."
Tsukuyomi blinked. "Senpai?" She asked, confused.
Konoka lifted her head. "Threesome?"
Tsukuyomi shrugged, threw her sword away and jumped in.
"Is... Is that... a giant joint?" Eishun asked, as a giant bead of sweat ran down the back of his neck.
Fate gave Sukuna a thumbs up, then he went back to the magic world.
Nobody really wanted to tell the (now mellow) giant ass demon it couldn't smoke it's giant-ass joint. So they decided to let it be. It OD'ed on heroine and died a week later.
Sukuna died happy.
Rakan blinked. "How did you just survive that? Scratch that, how do you keep getting up?" He asked, scratching the back of his neck. He was starting to believe that the kid was some kind of zombie or something.
Negi tilted his head in confusion, a completely idiotic expression in his face that frustrated Rakan to no end. He knew the kid had been Nagi's, but he was even WORSE.
"There's something on your face." Kotaro said.
Then Rakan felt a truly incredible hit come from the wolf boy, if only because he'd actually felt that one.
"IT WAS PAIN!" The Hanyo yelled.
"Hey, look, it says gullible in that wall." Negi said.
"Hey, it do-" Kagetaro began, looking at the wall that did, indeed, read 'Gullible'. "Oh you stole my lungs."
Then he collapsed to the ground.
"Man. This shit's awesome." Quartum pronounced.
"Agreed." Quintum agreed. "You finally seem to be useful for something other than burning things, too."
"Normally, I'd be pissed at that comment." Quartum said. "But right now, I'm overwhelmed by a sense of brotherly love."
Sextum didn't comment, as she was in the process of taking a drag at the moment and couldn't be bothered.
"Told you." Fate said. "How about an incestuous foursome now?"
For some reason, a car that left flaming tracks behind itself suddenly appeared out of nowhere. One of its doors raised and out stepped Dynamis. "I just built a time machine in a cave with a box of scraps. And it's a car."
"Either that, or it's a collective hallucination."
"But Marijuana is not a hallucinogen." Quintum pointed out.
"Maybe you're all my hallucination?" Dynamis proposed.
"Dude." Sextum commented.
"Anyway, I came back from the future to tell you not to engage in incest. It'll create a war that will end up causing me to stub my toe. It hurt for WEEKS! WEEKS I TELL YOU!"
"Double rainbow all the way 'cross the sky~" The Lifemaker intoned, as he skipped around the gravekeeper's palace.
"Actually, turns out that all he needed was a hug." Asuna said, shrugging.
"Marijuana solves everyone's problems." Negi said, nodding to himself. "It even cures Emo! I must spread the glory of MJ to the world!"
"Go on, my brother! Spread the glory of Cannabis everywhere!" Fate said, patting him in the shoulder.
And everyone was high ever after.
"All's well that ends well." The redhead invincible hero commented.
Arika blinked. "You're high too, aren't you?"
"Maybe." Nagi said, a goofy smile on his face.
"How the hell did this happen?" Godel asked, scratching the top of his head.
Hell if I know.