Disclaimer: Don't own it, belongs to McGee and EA.

A/N: Moving back in, happy now? Only because the site I was currently using is being shut down in a couple months so I'm back here with a small haul of my fics with me. I'll probably have them up here in a couple of days. For those of you who stayed with me, thank you.


My name is Elizabeth Liddell, and I have never left this room. I have no family and no memories of my past. I was…lost. But I wasn't alone, not anymore. I live with Dr. Angus Bumby, my guardian…and my lover. He took me in, he helped me with my condition, and he protects me from the evils of the world. In return, I gave him my heart. I love him and he loves me.

I just wish I could go outside though…

I stay in his room, he always locks the door. "For protection" he says. We live in the East End; there are always bad people about. He tells me that there are people wanting to harm me, that he wants me to be safe. He makes sure I have all the necessities I need: food, clothing, books (none of them fictional), the occasional jewelry. He tries to alleviate my boredom, most of the time we just make love. Sometimes he tells me about my old life, how we met, how we fell in love.

Too bad I don't remember anything about it.

I try to please him the best I can, but sometimes I make him angry. He frightens me sometimes…he never hurt me! Not once! It's just…he doesn't like the stories I tell him, about a place called Wonderland. He screams at me how it would ruin everything. That I was ungrateful, how I was nothing without him. I don't want to see him like that again. So I stopped asking him questions about it, and my family. "Reject the painful as you would the repulsive and depraved. Forgetting is an art." He often tells me, he knows more about my past, but he refuses to say. He only tells me what I need to know. That I am alone in this world, and only he can protect me. That he only wants me safe, that I should behave. He makes it up to me, spending the whole day with me instead of helping people outside. I don't remember much after that, only the good parts. I'm so confused…

But I do know my name is Elizabeth, but…sometimes the voices call me Alice.

I asked him about it once. Oh, he was dreadfully angry, he tells me; "Alice is dead! There is no Alice Liddell. Don't you ever speak of this again!" It's just a name! I didn't mean to! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'll be good, I promise!

He threw me on the bed. It was the first time he was rough with me. It hurts, he kept chanting, "Lizzie," as I cried in pain. I never brought the subject up again. The next day, he made me watch a key swinging back and forth…

What?

No, you've got it all wrong. He would never hurt me. He loves me; I must be spouting nonsense again. I'm sick you know; Angus is helping me get better. He keeps the voices away.

Alice…

Alice…

Alice…what have you done?

I…don't know an Alice. My name is Elizabeth! Sometimes…I feel like an Alice…but! My name is Elizabeth! He told me so!

Alice…

"Whoever destroys a soul, destroys the world. There is much wisdom in that Alice."

"Help us Alice! Save us, Alice! Don't leave us alone, Alice. Don't abandon us, Alice. Stay with us!"

"You don't know your own mind!"

Alice…

Alice…

ALICE!

Stop it! Go away! Leave me alone! I'm not Alice! Someone help me! My head…it hurts!

My name is…

My name is…

My name is…


A/N: *Looks back at fic, sighs* Something I was fiddling around with. It's basically Bumby brainwashed Alice to become Elizabeth. He keeps her locked up in his room so no one knows where Alice went and to prevent Alice from remembering anything. As far as anyone in London knows, Alice is dead. No one has ever seen her, and since Dr. Bumby put the word out that Alice is dead. He needs to keep Alice locked up for appearance's sake, and he's nuts like that. Alice will sometimes remember what happened but Bumby keeps making her forget.