A/N: Finally! This is one of my favorite chapters. I hope you all enjoy this as much as I do. Speaking of which, be sure to read Feminine Reflection. It's a companion story to this one, written by Astral Writer.
Disclaimer: I'm starting to think the only thing I'm reliable about is not owning Saiyuki. So... yeah. I'm not reliable.
Wait, that wasn't the point of this. It's actually that I don't own Saiyuki.
It wasn't long until both Sanzo parties were seated at one, large, round table, sans table cloths.
"I'm sorry, but I don't think I caught your name, handsome." Goumei asked, propping her chin on her fist, grinning teasingly. She'd been addressing the male version of Hachiko, who was seated next to her. From there, Gojyo was next to him, followed by the male Goku, and male Sanzo. Who, by the way, didn't look all that different from the female Sanzo next to him, or happy to be seated next to her. Their monkey was next, followed by Hachiko.
Speaking of which, Hachiko looked scandalized at Goumei's forward question. She knew Goumei had a very open personality, but that... that was her! But not her. In a sense, Hakkai was like a stranger to Goumei, and Hachiko felt it was alright to swat Goumei under the table in reproach. Goumei had to try to keep her laughter back.
"Ah, um. It's Hakkai." He answered. Apparently, the question had made him choke on his food. Judging by the smile on Gojyo's face, Goumei guessed that he understood what she was doing. That was good, she wouldn't want to hurt his feelings.
"Wow, you two really are just that remarkably similar." The male Hachiko—Hakkai—said. "What was it that you said earlier, Gojyo? Something about how 'It was like we were on the same wave length'?"
Gojyo blushed a bit, taken by surprise by the revelation. "Shut up, 'Kai." he responded, and looked like he was going to continue, before he faltered. "We really do think the same." he sounded stunned.
"Yeah?" Goumei agreed, wondering where this was going. Then she got it. They were the same person. She was just as shocked, she'd been looking forward to a good evening. She couldn't sleep with herself. But then, she started considering it. Was it really that vain to sleep with yourself? Wouldn't it be something like masturbation? It probably wasn't good for reproduction, but they weren't going to get that far anyway.
Maybe it was just best to put the idea on hold for a while. She didn't want to deal with it now. "Well, I do make one sexy man." she said, focusing on an easier topic, a grin pulling at her lips.
"And I make one fine lady." Gojyo returned.
"Ah, thank you." she tittered.
"Would you two shut up!" came the angry snarl of what Goumei was certain was the male Sanzo. Goumei instinctively shrank from the sound of an angry priest.
"Wait... why should I shut up?" Goumei questioned to herself. She did not have to obey that Sanzo! He wouldn't be travelling with her, and thus had no power over her.
"Because I have a gun." Her Sanzo answered, going for the revolver in her sleeve. Goumei held her hands up, signaling that she'd comply. No need to get violent.
Sanzo's attention shifted from Goumei, to the other redhead. She'd felt his eyes on her for a while, and it was making her skin crawl. "And what are you staring at, Kappa?"
"Sorry, didn't realize I was staring." said Kappa muttered.
"And what the fuck did you think you were doing?" Sanzo challenged. She'd had too much of guys hitting on her altogether; she didn't allow it...at all.
"Isn't it nice how much we're all getting along?" Hakkai said to Hachiko, leaning around Goumei.
"I couldn't agree more." she said, a tight smile on her lips.
"Whatever." apparently the other Sanzo could talk as well.
Genzou Sanzo was done with the stupid kappa, and reached for the mayonnaise. She stopped when another hand came into her line of sight. She looked up into the same image she saw in the mirror. He was challenging her. Who did he think he was?! She stared silently back; he was not getting her to back down, no matter what. He'd just have to be the first one to look away.
There was a clatter, as chairs were pushed back and plates rattled. Goumei had the other Goku by the front of his shirt, half dangling over the table. "You. Do not. Steal. My. Food." she said menacingly, staring him down. This was not the typical anger between a kappa and monkey. This was the kind of killing intent that could be seen on the battlefield. "Got that?" This monkey was not allowed to mess with her food. She had her own monkey to deal with, she was not taking on another one.
She watched the bastard nod, before dumping him back in his chair, and sitting down again. Hachiko bit her lip, deciding not to say anything about the fact that she'd witnessed their Goku taking food from Goumei's plate during the exchange. It looked like Goumei was too upset to notice anyway, so why cause more problems?
As things settled at the table, Sanzo set down the jar of mayonnaise, finished adding it to her food. On the other side of her, between herself and Goku. She'd taken it while that stupid bitch was barking at the other monkey. Now, if that cheap copy wanted the mayonnaise, he'd have to ask. That seemed very unlikely. So, the jar would stay there as a symbol of her victory. She could feel him staring at it, wanting it but not willing to do anything about it.
Goku also noticed the Sanzo-that-wasn't-quite-her-Sanzo looking at something. It was a jar of mayonnaise. Her Sanzo liked mayonnaise. Did he want it? Probably, that seemed about right for her Sanzo. He probably wouldn't ask for it either. She picked up the jar and held it out to him. "Here." she said with a smile.
Sanzo blinked at that, glaring at her monkey from the corner of her eye. Stupid little shit; did she really just give away her trophy? She watched as the jar changed hands, and turned her head slightly to glare at her monkey better.
Goku looked confused, wondering why Sanzo seemed so upset all of a sudden. "What?" she asked innocently.