Yoh! I'm back! Just returned from reading another TF2 fanfic... it really made me go on an adventure, you know? The title's "Reunion", then it has a 2nd part, called "Afterwards - Book 1"...
It was one of the best fanfics i've ever read.
Anyway, thanks to all who reviewed, faved, and followed! I'm sendin' y'all my kisses!
Now, shall we?
"How on earth does this bloody device work?!"
Sniper had been staring at the cigarette box for some time now. Because of his confusion and boredom, he felt as if some narrator found his way into his head, narrating about how much time has passed since he started cloaking under the tunnels.
It's been nearly 15 minutes and I am barely alive… I still have not done anything, and both food and water are getting scarce... If this keeps up, I would have to drink my own piss -
"Shut up brain, I need to think!"
He quickly sat down, still cloaked. His head rested on the palm of his right arm as he squat on the cold floor, thinking about the situation. His brows met as he analyzed he invisible device he was holding. As long as he refrained from moving, he will remain invisible to the naked eye, thanks to the cloak-and-dagger.
Oh how he missed being a Sniper.
Metal clonks were heard… someone was approaching. He raised his head to see who it was.
The clonks got stronger, and suddenly, the head of the RED Pyro peeked from one corner of the tunnel. Once he was sure that 'no one' was around, he went by him and refilled both his ammo and health.
The little devil flicked the switch of his Degreaser, and started to spread fire around the platform. Since they were on the same team, it had no effect on the hidden 'Spy'.
But something really close to him started burning.
"Ah! Fire, FIRE!" cried the voice, in a French accent.
"Bloody hell?" thought the Sniper. Who the heck was that?
The RED Pyro beamed in an instant. "Mermmph! Hermph hermph hermph hermph herrrrrrmph!"
He followed the burning invisible force with his fire, and eventually they were deep in the tunnels. Sniper was not able to see them after that, but he did hear the sound of a dead body hitting the metal and a psychopathic laugh coming out of a gas mask.
"It was the wanker from the other team!" thought the Sniper. "Damn crouton! Why can't he just find his own spot and hoide there?!"
Suddenly a thought struck him like one of Soldier's rockets. Sniper's eyes grew to the size of saucers.
"HOW LONG WOS THAT FRENCH BASTARD SITTIN' NEXT TAH ME?!"
Did he know that he was there?!
Sniper did NOT like what was going on. It would be better if he went away from this place and start roaming around than to stay and hide beside another cloaked bastard that wasn't there. He stood up, but before he kept the cigarette box he was holding, he took one of the sticks (specifically the third one) and placed it in his mouth. Using Spy's trusty lighter, he put a flame to the end of the stick.
Besides, that Frenchie's lungs are probably damaged already. No harm would happen if he smoked some more.
The Australian man (in soul but not in body) made his way through the empty tunnels. He was not able to track the amount of cloak time left, and he was distracted by the sounds of the water splashes and his brain talking to himself… This made him unaware that he was no longer cloaked.
The stairs were clearly seen at the end of the tunnel, and so the former sharpshooter swaggered towards it.
Then he saw the BLU logo stamped to the side of the wall.
"Oh damn… wrong side!"
He didn't know what to do… should he charge and backstab someone? He doesn't even know how to disguise! What about going back to base? The real Spy might tease him for being a coward… going back is not an option. Should he cloak? He saw already cloaked, so why not try to enter enemy base?
He climbed each step carefully, watching out for any bloody BLUs that would go by them.
"Oi! What are yah doin' here Mumbles?"
'Spy' froze in his track, and slowly looked at the BLU Sniper, eye to eye.
That BLU Sniper, that stupid little bastard, that son-of-a-three-legged-kangaroo, that annoying prick that rivaled him in his own unique skill…
With him around, his skill isn't considered unique around here. How'd he see him anyway? He was cloaked, wasn't he?
"Go Spy check on those machines of the Truckie; he needs your help you know."
"What's going on? Doesn't he know I am a Spy?"
"Werrh arrh yermmph terrmmph…."
"BLU Pyro…!" thought the Sniper as it dawned on him. Confusion started to fill his brain. "HOW IN THE HELL DID I DISGUISE AS THE BLU PYRO?!"
This isn't the best situation for him. He was trapped in a puddle of thoughts. How did he activate disguise? Did he do something earlier, triggering the damn box? Was it that bloody wanker that sat next to me for the whole time, under a cloak? Or did that damn Frenchie toy with the device just to make him have a hard time trying to get the concept of disguising?
"You okay there mate? Wait a minute…"
BLU Sniper hit him with the rifle he was holding and that pained the Aussie very much.
"ERGH! MMPH ERMPHERRMPH!"
The Sniper just said 'OW!', but the word had more syllables in Pyro language. How does the arsonist keep up with such slurred speech anyway? But he needed to set those Pyro thoughts aside first; his true identity has been revealed, and he had to have an escape plan.
The BLU Sniper changed his weapon fast, and a split second later, he was holding his SMG. Bullet after bullet shot from the gun, but most of it missed the 'Pyro' who started jumping sideways.
"Stay put yah Frenchie!"
Thanks to his fast feet, Sniper was able to get a good glimpse of his rival's back.
The body went limp and fell like a ragdoll and after a few minutes, it seemed to dissolve into the air. This signified the respawn going on. The Pyro disguise wore off in an instant and this exposed his true character.
But this was not the case, what was important was what the Sniper has achieved.
"I… I was able to backstab the damn wanker…" he muttered to himself. He never thought that he'd actually be able to do it… It seemed impossible at first, but not anymore.
Sniper grinned to himself, and proceeded to take another one of his cigarettes. "HaHAH! Take that, yah blind-eyed bastard! You've been killed by the BEST!" cried the Sniper, in a tone that would make you believe that this man never took a step in French territory, but spent his whole life under the hot desserts of Australia. The 'Spy' flicked the lighter, and lit up his cigarette… but a gloved hand from behind caught it before he could even place the stick in his mouth.
A hot breath whispered into his right ear. "Did you miss me, mon ami? Non? Oh, I'm sure you miss THIS!"
Shwack! The BLU Spy's knife cut deep into Sniper's heart. He grinned evilly as he let go of his opponent, and dramatically stepped before him, loving the scene of his 'rival' dying. "Something's not right with you my friend… is it because you suddenly started to… suck?!"
The Aussie fell forward; his right hand clutching his heart as the burning pain spread all over his body. He secretly took out the Ambassador and made sure that this was not seen by the annoying Spook. "I… argh… nev… never missed yah…"
"…head, bloody Spook."
Both bodies collapsed on the grounds of the enemy base.
That was one of the best close-up head shots the Sniper has done in his whole life as a mercenary. Once a Sniper, always a Sniper.
A full, satisfied smile remained on his dead face.
What was happening to him?
He was losing his cool, of course.
Spy stomped angrily as he exited the resupply room for the 4th… or 5th… wait. How many times has he died already?
Even he lost count. Yet what he did not forget was that all of his deaths were caused by one and one person only…
And we all know who it was.
"Once I get my sights on that 'ippie, I will definitely KILL 'im right away!" said the Spy. He positioned himself near the Texan's dispenser found in the left wooden corner of the anterior side of their base. He was starting to feel a bit nervous and doubtful and this kept him from charging at the enemy Sniper.
He imagined himself taking once step into that open space, and getting shot in the head a second after.
Ugh, not the prettiest sight, I must tell you. Besides, that place was Sniper haven.
But he had to have his revenge. Putain, it would have been easier if he were a Spy… especially since it was a Sniper dominating him. Just a simple backstab to the back would teach that damn Australian a lesson.
Oh how he missed being a Spy.
"Hard day huh, Stretch?" asked the Engineer. He was banging his level three sentries with the Wrench. "But sometimes we win, sometimes we lose… that's the cycle 'round here in Teufort."
"Tsk, I'm afraid so mate."
Despite the troubles he was facing, the Spy had to keep his act up. It was one of the best things he could do; lie and pretend.
"Not that I want to brag, Spook, but I actually killed two tahday."
The Spy turned around to see his smirking self.
"Have yah killed anyone tahday, mate?" Sniper asked him. He finally had something to brag about; a pie to press to the arrogant face of the prideful Frenchman.
Before he was able to reply, the Spy took a good look around the surroundings. Engineer was nowhere near them, probably setting up teleporters for easy access to the intelligence room. He had to be careful whenever he was talking around the toymaker… that guy can analyze a situation like a child's jigsaw puzzle. Well, he's an Engineer… he could always solve practical problems and out-of-place situations.
"I'm quite sure that you just got lucky, Bushman. Don't press your luck though… it'll run out soon."
"You're just saying that because yah weren't able to kill anyone since the beginning of the countdown!"
"Didn't I tell you to stop using your weird Australian accent on my voice?"
"Now you're just changin' the bloody subject."
Spy rubbed his temples, trying to convey to the sharpshooter that he was getting irritated. "Do not disturb me… and stop acting like a child! This is not some game of who-kills-the-most-people! Shoo, get out of my sight –
Sniper stood stiffly as he watched his own body got shot to the ground by a powerful bullet. "Tsk tsk, looks loike he's not having a blast at doing my job…"
WE HAVE TAKEN THE ENEMY INTELLIGENCE!
"Runrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunr - "
BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!
"COME BACK YAH LITTLE MAGGOT!"
FOMP! FOMP! FOMP!
"WHERE ARE YEH HEADED TO, YEH WEE SCAMPERIN' WEASEL?"
"DO NOT RUN LEETLE MAN!"
"Errmph erghh mmmpph!"
"GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE YA KNUCKLEHEAD!"
At this rate, he was never going make it. All offense classes and two defenses were all after him, making sure that he was not going anywhere outside their base with their intel. The Medic got hold of his scattergun and started shooting while running backwards.
He started to say some of his threats, just in case they would work. "Hold still dummfopfs! Zhis vill only sting for a moment - "
But his intimidations were nothing for a sentry gun equipped with rockets.
THE ENEMY HAS DROPPED OUR INTELLIGENCE!
The 'Scout's' body was shot to the wall, thanks to the BLU Engineer's sentry gun.
"Whoooeee! That's just one sad display boy!" he said. The enemy Texan then repaired and refilled the bullets of his contraption. "That'll keep 'em from comin'."
WE HAVE DROPPED THE ENEMY INTELLIGENCE!
Spy's headache was seriously starting to get bad…
He exited the second resupply room (the one to the right), half annoyed that he was STILL not able to get revenge on the enemy, and half humiliated that he got head shot right in front of that idiot Bushman.
Once outside, the first thing he saw was the Sniper leaning on the wooden wall with arms crossed, and a serious look on his face.
Spy's headache went from bad to worse.
"And what is it that you want this time, Bushman?"
"Maybe yah need a little tutorial on how tah use Debbie."
The Frenchman wanted to chuckle but the pain in his head was keeping him from doing so. "And what makes you think that I need one?"
"Because you're bat shit."
Spy exhaled deeply. "If you're just going to insult me - "
"In exchange, I want you to help me figure this bloody contraption out", said the Sniper, as he held out the cigarette box.
Oh. Looks like the Sniper hasn't figured it out his disguise mechanism yet.
"Fine, fine, l'enfance de l'art."
He took the cigarette box from his comrade, and picked the eighth stick. He then shot it into the other man's mouth and flicked it with a lighter.
Smoke seemed to seep out around the Sniper, which somehow puzzled him.
"Now talk to me, Bushman."
"What wos that all abou… Oi, I have my normal voice again! How'd yah do it?"
The Sniper looked at his arms and his whole body. Indeed, he was himself again. He wore the same hat, shirt, vest, sunglasses, and he was even carrying a gun… which of course was not real, for he was actually carrying the Ambassador. How did the Spook make him disguise?
Plus, he wasn't disguised as a BLU, but rather as a friendly RED Sniper.
"Wos it the cigarette, mate?"
Spy nodded his head in agreement. "Oui. There are 9 cigarettes in all, each for one class. It is arranged according to class type too, so the first cigar stick is for when you have to disguise as the Scout, the next for the Soldier, then the Pyro, Demoman, 'eavy, Engineer, Medic, yourself, and then me…"
"But how is it that I'm RED?"
"Ah, you just 'ave to take the cigars from the second set. Those are for disguising as our own teammates."
Sniper held the box close to his eyes. "Ah… no wonder I was the Pyro a while ago."
"Pretty much, mate. 'xept that I had no idea that I wos in disguise. Nearly got killed by that bloody kangaroo."
Silence followed, leaving each one deep inside their thoughts. Spy was thinking about how the bastard was able to kill two men without knowing much about the disguise and cloaking, while the Sniper half marveled and half rejoiced that he was temporarily himself again.
The Spy carefully observed the man in front of him. He was looking at his hands, smiling like a child being praised.
Lucky bastard. At least he could be seemingly in his own body for a short amount of time. What about himself? He had no chance of going back to his own body unless that crazy man… now a boy, would fix up the weird machine that caused all this…
The stillness of their current situation didn't last long, though. The silence was broken by, of course, that loud mouthed American.
He's usually the one with the best silence-breaking capabilities.
"WHAT ARE YAH MAGGOTS STANDING AROUND FOR? ARE YAH WAITING FOR THE 4th OF JULY?!"
The two mercenaries shot him annoyed looks, which had no effect on the helmet-donning Soldier. Their laser stare merely bounced off his hard helmet. He jumped right in front of the two of them, who were standing in front of the second resupply room. "I said… WHAT ARE YAH MAGGOTS - "
"SHUT YOUR MOUTH MATE I HEARD YOU LOUD AND CLEAR!" cried one of the two BLU Snipers.
Surprisingly, it was the real Spy who shouted. His bad mood was making him lose his 'cool and collected' type of personality.
"HOW DARE YAH TALK BACK TAH ME CAM - "
Solly's body fell to the floor and his helmet went rolling on the wood.
"That helmet's going to make a nice bowl for ya brains."
The BLU Sniper chuckled loudly to himself before he resumed looking through his scope. Man, this was a good day for him… all those poor, defenseless heads just keep popping out from anywhere. He's counted 17 kills, with 10 of them being headshots.
He didn't lose count at all; most especially since he knew that he has headshot that RED piker 8 times now.
How'd he become such an easy target?
"Yah havin' a good time, partner?" asked the BLU Engineer who just grabbed a few pieces of metal. He quickly used to refill his ammo and the rockets of the sentry as well.
"You bet, Truckie. It's quoite unusual though, they were always careful about crossing out in the open space… especially that RED Australian son-of-a-bitch… he's usually quick as a dingo when he shoots… wonder what happened tah him?"
BLU Engineer grabbed his PDA from his pocket and chose to build a dispenser near his mate. "Don't cha worry 'bout it Stretch… he just needs more oil on that rusty hinges of his. Good for you though, 'cause you're still up and runnin' quite fine."
By the time the Texan was done talking, his dispenser almost finished assembling itself. He gave a few blows to the machine for faster construction. "You know, I can't help but notice that somethin's wrong with the REDs today… I mean, their Scout usually charges for our more than 10 times in a row, and gets killed quite easily if he has no back-up…"
"Whot's wrong with their Scout now?"
"So far, he's reached the intel twice… and it takes a longer time for him to come back, plus, he has a new strategy whenever he comes back… not like his old self who keeps chargin' and chargin'."
The BLU Sniper looked through his scope to see if there were any new heads to shoot. After a short surveillance over the area, he figured that most of the offenses and defenses were either in the bases or the tunnels. It's rather funny though, their marksman hasn't shown up yet since his last death. He put his gun down and slowly approached the Engineer's dispenser for ammo.
"I think I know wot you're talkin' about, mate. I mean, that RED two-faced mongrel acted all unusual too. He didn't seem to be - "
The BLU Sniper's body collapsed a second after, and his hat was carried by the wind before it reached the floor. His mate merely stared and continued to upgrade his dispenser.
"Looks like someone's back on his horse."
"And there yah go, headshot."
The 'Spy', whose disguise of a friendly RED Sniper just evaporated, calmly gave his rifle to the Frenchman. "It's quite easy, yah wanker. You just have to find the right timing… and don't stay out in the open so long! It makes yah a head a bloody bull's eye for target practice."
"That's just it?... You make it look so easy Bushman… but of course, I can do an 'eadshot as neatly as you can."
The Sniper wouldn't believe him.
"If yah can, then show me."
The crouton grabbed Sniper's (in Spy's body) hand and removed the cloak-and-dagger. He swiftly wore it around his right hand and focused his eyes with the rifle's scope.
"What do yah intend tah do - "
"Shush, keep quiet Bushmn."
He fiddled with the watch and after a second, his whole body disappeared.
"Yah still there Spook?"
The Aussie in the suit stood impatiently and to show this to his companion, he leaned against the wall with arms crossed, far away from BLU Sniper's vision. He continued to stare at the 'Sniper' that wasn't there. "You know, if that American potato-head comes back and sees me standin' around like an idiot, I'm pretty sure that the situation won't be good for me."
"Shut your mouth; I need to concentrate."
Spy stood quietly while observing his teammates from afar.
He caught site of the Scout, the real Scout, who was firing his übercharge rays ate the huge Russian. They were able to kill a Pyro, a Soldier, a Scout and a cloaked Spy as they walked through the bridge, and it was quite clear on his face that he was enjoying every second of it, and he laughed maniacally as if he were the one holding Heavy's weapon.
But once the effects of invulnerability wore off, the Scout's expression changed from domination to fear.
"Oh man, back out, backoutbackout! No more übercharge fat guy, I repeat, NO MORE ÜBERCHARGE!" he cried as he ran backwards leaving the Heavy, who was quite confident that his Medic was still with him, to continue into the base. He quickly grabbed his Syringe gun and fired it like crazy as a BLU Demoman approached. "THIS SHIT IS DEFINITELY NOTHIN' LIKE MY SODA POPPER!"
Spy chuckled to himself. "Looks like I am not the only one with the little 'class' difficulties."
He looked in front of him and saw the BLU Sniper in the same damn place as he ever was ever since. This is it, a perfect moment.
"Spook, I have no idea of whot you are planning but - "
" – I highly doubt that - "
"I said 'shush'!"
" – you are going to be able tah - "
"Quit shushing me, yah posey - "
If the Sniper was going to keep talking, he would not be able to concentrate on his unknowing target. He positioned the scope right where the crosshairs pointed the head of his enemy.
The position, timing, angle, air velocity and moment were perfect. It was time for his revenge.
That caught the Australian's attention. "Wait… are yah decloaking?"
From afar, the BLU Engineer witnessed the second time his mate has died.
"'Ahahaha, no worries, mate! 'Ahahahaha!" laughed the Spy as he gave back the cloak-and-dagger to its temporary owner. "I just gave you a taste of your own medicine!"
The Sniper was not amused. "Yer a bloody cheat, yah know that?"
He took one of his cigarettes from his newly acquired box. "What can I say, Bushman? Once a Spy, always a Spy."
ALERT! THE ENEMY HAS TAKEN OUR INTELLIGENCE!
Engineer ran from the front of the base, down to the slopes, and into the intel room. Sure enough, he'd found a BLU Scout carrying their intelligence. "See yah, knucklehead!"
"Dang dagnabbit, damn it!" The Texan kept his Wrench and took out his trusted Frontier Justice and started shooting at the quick kid. Of course, he was too slow to keep up. The Bostonian shot him twice, and the pain was enough to make him fall and shout in agony. He caught sight of their 'Scout' exiting the underground resupply, and the enemy nearly bumped into him as he sped towards the stairs to the outside of the intel room.
The Medic's eyes grew wide but he just stood there as the Scout backed up and rushed to the stairs.
"What're yah doing, son? That string bean's got our intel!"
"Do you zhink zhat I vould be able to catch up to zhat?!" asked the Medic. He pointed at the stairs and shot the Engineer a look of disbelief.
"Whaa?" Engie asked himself, and his gut reacted again. But that was beside the main point. "You are the SCOUT! OF course you'll be able to catch up to him, son! What is wrong with your head today?!"
That sentence slapped the Medic hard enough to get him back to what was going on…
"Ah! M'on mah way hardhat!"
With that, the German ran like the Scout he was supposed to be. His 'lag' really bothered the Engineer though, and this didn't make the feeling of respawn quite confortable.
"Hey! The freak's got the intel!"
The real Scout heard this, and he just got out of the main resupply room. "Really? Da hell is he now?"
Medic shot him a 'play-your-part-'cause-I'm-playing-mine-well' look at the young man, then ran towards the wooden stairs, where the newly respawned Engie was building a sentry. "He's in the tunnels!"
Heavy, who also came from the resupply, overheard this. "Da! Let us catch him Doktor!"
"We can't get there fast enough!"
"Yeah yah can, Truckie's got teleporters under the tunnels!"
The Engineer stopped hitting his level 2 sentry for a brief moment and took a good long look at the Frenchman. "Wait… did the Spah just call me Truckie?"
The Sniper jogged to the nearest teleporter and stood on it. He quickly grabbed one of the cigarettes, and disguised as the BLU Sniper. "Yah can get there faster if yah use this."
The machine started to spin quickly, and lights covered the 'Spy'. In a second, he was teleported to the tunnels.
"I must be hearing things…" whispered the Engineer as he continued to upgrade his killing machines
Both the 'Medic' and the Heavy each stood on the teleporter, one before the other. In a few seconds, both were shooting bullets underground.
He's so near… so damn near… just a few more steps and when these stairs ran out, he'd be in BLU territory…
"Yah ain't gonna catch me yah faggots! Waananana!"
He ran, faster than before. Once passed through their team's Heavy, he felt come kind of assurance that he was going to make it.
Halfway throught the wooden stairs, he heard shouts… Voices of two Heavy's and a Medic were heard. He stopped for a while to listen to the noises they made.
"I WILL KEEL YOU FIRST!"
"Yeah! And I… will heal da fat guy 'till your brains explode, fat-ass!"
Sure enough, they won against the BLU Heavy… this was thanks to Scout's Medigun and the approaching soldier.
"LET'S MOVE, COMMRADES!"
"Ahahaha, we beat the butterball! Now run fat guy; we could still catch up to that BLU knucklehead!"
Once the BLU Scout heard this, he resumed running towards their intel room. But something suspicious got stuck in his mind… He can't quite place it…
"Oi, how're yah doin', mate?"
The boy jerked as he ran to the room, and relaxed when he saw it was the BLU Sniper. "Oh, s'just yah…"
Before he placed the intel on the table, the BLU Bostonian stopped for a while. "Yah know what Snipes…?"
"Whot, something wrong, bugger?"
"Do you feel dat something's quite weird with da RED Medic? He kinda sounds familiar tah me…"
The 'Sniper' shook his head. "Damn, even the enemy caught up with our switch... Is it that obvious?"
"Of course he's familiar tah you, you hear him almost every day - "
"No not dat kind of familiar, familiar… I mean, his tone's quite different. Kinda sounds like dat RED faggot, yah noo?"
Sniper looked around. They were already inside the intelligence room, and the kid was only a few feet away from their table.
He too, was a few steps away from their intel table… now he's only problem was the l'il bugger.
"Whaddayah think, Snipes? It's kinda creepin' me out…"
The Australian hesitated, and decided to prolong the moment. "How can you say that, mate? D'yah have evidence?"
"He calls me a faggot… and almost killed me with a stinkin' marble head…"
"Nothing weird with that."
"… he hit me while sayin', 'Look at this, just caved in your skull- my bat's still dry. No clumps a' hair, nothin'. I'm tellin' yah Snipes, somethin' weird's goin' on!"
Sheesh, that little bugger was not a good actor.
Steps were heard, and another BLU Sniper came into sight. Both of them shifted their attention to the man. "Hey, why isn't the intel – SPOI!"
When the BLU Scout faced his conversation partner, he nearly choked on his saliva.
He was staring at the RED French bastard.
Sniper lunged forward with the butterfly knife, but missed so bad because of the kid's speed. The BLU Sniper got a hold of his SMG and started firing at the traitor. "Oi kiddo, capture the intel!"
The kid was quick to dodge another stab from the Sniper, and he ran so fast towards the table that he stumbled on it, slipped across, and fell to the other side.
SUCCESS! WE HAVE SECURED THE ENEMY INTELLIGENCE!
The Aussie heard the 'Medic' and Solly nearby cuss words as a sentry beeped. He shifted his gaze from the ridiculously posed Scout to his former rival, only to be greeted by a rifle muzzle that was gently pressed against his balaclava.
"Good night yah bloody Spook."
...And that's it.
They lost the mission that day, and Sol's not too happy about it. The next chappie will be about how they would spend the weekend as the other class...
... and Engie might just figure out their little secret.
Anyway, thanks for reading! Don't forget to review, fave, and follow! Next chapter will probably be out next week :D