Author's Note: Another Beckdam from me. I hope you don't mind - Eclare is after all, my number one; but I adore Beckdam too. Anyways, I do not own Degrassi, and I hope you enjoy!
Adam Torres sat down on the steps outside of the school where he had asked her to meet him. His stomach was twisted into knotted ribbons – the kind of ribbons only she could tie and loose. He bothered his lower lip between his teeth, hoping she would hurry up and meet him soon before he lost his courage and bolted. He needed to do this though, despite how painful it might be.
A few minutes later, he saw her making her way over to him. She was donning her usual cheerful smile. Adam glanced around to see if anyone was still lingering. He had asked her to meet him after her Christian Coalition Club wrapped up – that way, the school would be pretty vacant and they could meet in privacy. The mid-afternoon sun splashed gold into her hair, making her look even more stunning than she already was. Adam felt his palms go sweaty; he kept having to tell himself that this was necessary – that he needed to do this. His sanity was not going to become a martyr.
"Adam," she waved and made her way to the steps, "Hey!"
"Hey, Becky," Adam nodded towards her, "How was your meeting?"
"It was good. I told my brother I wanted to stay behind and work on my English paper a bit, so he already went home. We're pretty much alone, like you asked. What's up, Adam?"
Adam knew that this moment would be difficult, but nothing could prepare him to that exact moment when he would actually have to carry through with what he was about to do. He sucked in a deep breath, tried to calm the butterflies in his stomach, and swallowed the lump that had grown like a tumor in his throat.
"Adam?" Becky blinked, expectantly. He needed to do this. It would be now or never…
"Becky, we need to break up."
Adam sighed, releasing the breath he didn't realize he had been holding. He didn't want to look at her, but he did. Her brow was creased and burdened with confusion and her eyes swam back and forth as she tried to process his words.
"I don't understand, Adam…"
"Becky…I-I can't do this anymore," Adam shook his head, trying to get the words to form into cognitive sentences, "You…you asked me to be your secret boyfriend, and at first I was okay with that. But now…now, I don't accept that."
"You need to make a decision, Becky. You can't have me on your terms. You either have all of me, or you have none of me. That means, no more secret relationship. If you like me, don't hide me like I am something to be ashamed of. I know you're scared of what your parents think and what your brother will think, but I am exhausted of this. I can't do this anymore."
"Okay?" That surprised him. What did she mean by 'okay?' None of this was at all okay.
"No more secret relationship," she shook her head, that huge smile still planted on her face, "I understand," her face sobered and she said, "It was wrong of me to even ask you to be a part of something as immature as a secret relationship. I can't even imagine how hard that was on you because…well…it was hard on me too."
"What are you saying?" Adam's brow furrowed in confusion. This whole conversation was not exactly going as he had envisioned.
"I am saying I was wrong – something I don't say often," she laughed a soft laugh that reminded Adam of his grandmother's wind chimes, "No more secret relationship. I am not ashamed of you Adam. I am scared…but I care about you so much. I am not going to hide you away. Things are going to change now."
"But…what about your family?" Adam felt the knots in his stomach tighten, "What will they say? In their eyes, I am a girl and that makes you a lesbian…"
"Adam," Becky shook her head softly before their eyes met as old friends, "You are a guy between the ears – where it matters."
"Not to your parents…"
"To me, Adam. Where it matters to me. My parents have influenced my life so much. They want what they think is best for me, but right now I have to do what I know is best for me – not just what I think is best. I know being with you is what is best. I care about you too much. When we first kissed, I expected it to feel differently. I thought I'd feel weird for it, but it wasn't. It felt right. When I am with you…it feels right. Nothing else matters. I know in my heart, what I feel for you, could never be a sin."
Adam felt tears stinging venomously inside his eyes, and he blinked to keep them from escaping. He didn't know what to say. He definitely was not expecting that reaction from Becky Baker, and it was a welcome, albeit stunning, surprise.
"I don't know what to say…"
"Then don't," Becky smiled shyly before her lips treated his with a chaste kiss. When she pulled away, she was blushing furiously but smiling, "My family isn't expecting me to be back for a while…how about we go get dinner."
"Yes," she giggled, "As in our first real, public date."
"Wow," Adam's eyes were saucers, but his smile was evident, "Alright. Where do you want to go, Miss Becky Baker?"
"Hmm…Little Miss Steaks?"
"There's a lot of kids from school that eat there. Are you sure you want to go on a date with me there?"
"Why, Adam Torres, if I didn't know better," she grinned playfully, "I'd say you are ashamed to be seen with me," she pulled him up from the steps and he swung her around into a hug.
His voice was molasses as he whispered in her ear, "Never."
They walked to the restaurant together holding hands down the street. Adam couldn't believe how perfectly her hand fit into his. His eyes met hers and they shared a shy smile as they continued down the sidewalk.
"I was…I was scared I would lose you today," Adam admitted, "When I gave you that ultimatum."
"Adam, you should know better," Becky shook her head, smiling at him, "It was always you – it will always be you."