A/N: Slash. Lots of Swearing, Adult language, Adult themes.

It was official, he'd gone crazy, loopy, nutty, insane, wacky, mental. Next trip: to the loony bin. This wasn't supposed to happen. Every villain deserved their beating, every druggie a cold turkey dose of reality. So why was he so shaken up? It wasn't his fault the kid wasn't waking the fuck up. He'd tried to act hard, being the dog bollocks and it bit him in the arse, same old shit, just on a different day, that's all.

"Get it together Carter, Get it together". He'd seen kids like Nick. Usually all mouth and no trousers, but Nick was different. Trained like mad in Mixed Martial Arts, took on any dodgy fucker anytime, anywhere. Carter admired him...to a point. Put in a good word with Reagan, they set him up as a snitch. Nick needed months of convincing, but he was a runner he could get in and out easily. He was slim and athletic with a good memory and knew when and where to keep his mouth shut.

The set up was perfect or so Carter thought. Nick was gonna spread the word in for a diamond trade. He was gonna act as a middleman and broker the deal, then the arrests would be made. Only it didn't happen like that. It went tits up. A gun got pulled, Nick got mouthy and ended up with a bullet in the shoulder. That wasn't the worst part, the bullet was a graze compared to the arsekicking Nick got from squaring up to the sellers.

It wasn't fair, but that was life. Regan and Carter were both offered Compassionate leave and both told the supervisors, managers and psychiatry teams where to stick it. Carter wished he was like Regan, Regan could just forget about work, got out on the piss and fuck a fittie later. Carter took Nick's shooting hard. Maybe it was the guilt, maybe he should have done his job properly, maybe he let Nick and his family down.

It didn't help that Nick's little brother Nate would run over to Carter's place every night giving him abuse. Carter knew he could get a cop car around in a second, but he couldn't do it. Little Nate was on a downward spiral, shitting himself because he had nowhere to turn. "Come out here and fucking face me dick!" Nate yelled out. Carter did what he always did when this happened. He watched TV and turned up the volume. This time he waited for five minutes before taking the door off the latch.

He starting walking to the fridge, when Nate walked in, charging like a baby calf hands near his face jabbing Carter in the stomach. Knowing a few boxing techniques himself Carter imposed himself using his weight advantage. A kick to the chest later and Carter felt free to make his house rules. "You've got a bit of blood yeah?" Carter said as a bruise started swelling on his cheek. "Now you can piss off mate" Carter said carrying on his walk to the fridge.

"You fucked everything up" Nate said sitting up, but still in too much pain to get back to his feet. "Don't you think I know that?" Carter asked. He went to the fridge unable to see that Nate was planning another secret attack, he bent down staring at the pot noodle that was over a week old. His mind went blank after Nate was going for his neck again trying to put him a headlock. Carter had the height gain when he leaned up. He pried Nate's thin fingers away from his neck. The skinny bastard left scratches.

"You fuck" Carter said pushing Nate down on the counter and putting his arm behind his back. "I could arrest you right fucking now" "Well then fucking do it!" Nate shouted. Carter roughly turned Nate around still holding him by the arm. The kiss was an accident. The "Oh shit" moment that Carter walked away from at first, thinking he could take it back. Nate literally asked for it without words or questions as Carter took Nate's pain away and replaced it with gulity numbness.

"I don't wanna go back home" Nate said buckling up his jeans. "Not without Nick" "Let's fucking kidnap him from hospital" Carter teased. "You're such a dick" Nate said sitting on the sofa. "So you keep telling me" Carter said going to the fridge and looking for that pot noodle. He put some on a plate and gave Nate the rest of the noodles in the pot. "How's ya dad?" Carter asked. He did give a shit. Nate and Nick's Dad Trevor was in the shit. He was still working at the factory but ever since Nick got shot and beaten Trevor hadn't been eating much. It freaked Nate out, he didn't know what to say to make things better.

Nick was so much better at holding everything together. Now he was unconscious in a hospital bed peeing through a tube. "Dad's...not good, thanks to you" Nate said prodding at the chicken in the pot noddle. "We'll find the bastards...I promise" Carter said. "Bullshit" Nate said bitterly. Carter got up as his mobile rang. It was Regan, he was still on the move with the Gavrik case. The Gavriks were untouchable shit-bags, but Regan was determined to being them down. While Regan still had that faith, Carter had the same faith too.

"Yeah, I'm on my way!" Carter said excitedly as he pushed open the bedroom door. He could see Nate walking away and followed him to the sofa, where Nate took his half of the pot noodle stirred what was left, spat in it, and chucked it on the sofa. Carter wasn't in the mood for Nate's naughtiness. He grabbed Nate's arm again pushing him to the door. "You fucking break it, you pay for it" Nate said. "Use the fucking NHS" Carter said opening the front door. "What NHS? No Hockey-whore Sent-back in your case" Nate said as he stepped outside.

"Well I'm sending you back...I know you want our team on Nick's case and we doing our best, but, Nick's gotta wake up if we're gonna find the cock-knobs that did it" Carter said.

"What if Nick doesn't wake up?" Nate asked, his voice breaking, but Carter pretended not to notice.

Carter hesistated looking around back at his noodle trashed flat. By the time he thought about looking back and giving Nate an answer Nick's little brother was gone. Carter went to the bathroom, cleared himself up and went to work, putting everything behind him. He got in the car with Regan listening to him going on about the Gavriks. "Sash is ours ain't he?...He's got to be" Regan said rubbing his hands.

"Nick Diaz...any update?" Carter asked.

"Carter...for fucks sake...you can't feel guilty for that one. I mean Nick went off the wall. Thinking he was Superman...If it makes you feel better the supervisor's gonna go with us to his brother's place"

"What...Nate?" Carter asked with a sore throat.

"Yeah, they're gonna say a million sorry's, tell the kid the normal bullshit and put the case on ice" Regan explained.

"Bastards...on fucking ice...Nick's case is at the back of the queue... they're only visiting Nate cause they don't want Nate and his Dad Trevor to sue" Carter realised.

"Yeah well...get ready to smile and look pretty" Regan said turning on the radio. Carter had to make sure he wasn't there, the last thing he needed was Nate having his memory jogged and making his life hell. He was sure that Nate didn't want his Dad Trevor to find out about their little mistake, but if Nick got no justice Nate could use their encounter to ruin Carter's life and career. The only thing Carter could do was to get to Nate before they were both was eaten alive by a stupid reckless mistake.