Celebrity Jeopardy: KOF Edition

Rated T

Disclaimer: I do not own Saturday Night Live, Celebrity Jeopardy, or the King of Fighters series. Just to let you know.


Chapter 6

The Celebrity Jeopardy theme song had kept on playing once again for the sixth time as Alex Trebek stood alongside three more fighters which involved two new fighters and a certain flame-bringer.

"And welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy: KOF Edition." Trebek responded a bit grimly. "Before we start Double Jeopardy, I strongly advise everyone watching at home to please leave the room immediately. These next several minutes you may see here will cause severe blindness to your eyesight permanently. With that said in mind, let's take a look at the scores. In 1st place with 0 is K' Dash."

K' Dash is shown just yawning and leaning in this crapfest known as a podium.

"This show is trash. Everything is trash. Just like you are, Trebek." K' said to Trebek in a foul mood.

"Well... nice to know that you're here, I guess..." Trebek said right to him just trembling in fear, "In 2nd place with -7,000, is Soiree Meira."

"That's right! All of you better represent!" Soiree said to the rest of the camera and everyone in the stands, "You're looking at the main attraction himself!"

"For the last time, Soiree... you are not the main attraction." Trebek said in a very stern voice, "And finally. Good god, in last place with -120,000... is Kyo Kusanagi."

"We meet once again, you sperm-stache..." Kyo said through such nonsense, "It's like Christmas for me."

"I assume that you really think so, Mr. Kusanagi..." Trebek said as he looked like he was about to cringe. "It's time for Double Jeopardy, let's take a look at the board. The categories are: 'Potent Potables', 'Your Name' in which if you ring in and say your name, you get the points. Moving on, 'Christmas', 'Types of Birds', Foods that ends with 'acon', and finally 'Bodies', in which I'll show you a picture or line art of a body and you tell me which has the same body as the picture shown on the board. It may even resemble one of you. So, Mr. K. You start."

"I'll take Beef Jerky." K' Dash said to Trebek.

"Beef Jerky is not a category, K." Trebek said to him very sternly.

"I know, s**thead. I need something to kill my appetite when you talk." K' said to him in a very rudely manner.

"You're such a pain, K'. I'll let Mr. Kusanagi go first." Trebek said to the no-nonsense K' as he focused right on Kyo.

"That's mighty fine of you, Sperm-stache." Kyo smiled right at him as he chose a category, "I'll take 'Boobies' for $400."

"Boobies'? No, Kyo, it's 'bodies' not boobies!" Trebek said to Kyo, just fuming from the forehead. "You know what? Choosing you was a mistake, so I'll have to pick a category. Let's try Food that ends in 'acon' for $400, the question is: This is the only food that ends in 'acon'."

Hearing this, Soiree decided to take a stab at it by buzzing in.

"Soiree Meira?" Trebek said to him.

"What is Taco?" Soiree guessed stupidly.

"No, it isn't. How can taco end in 'acon'?" Trebek said snapping at the Angel of the Evening himself.

"It's a new term, Taco-acon! It's perfect!" Soiree exclaimed to the host crazily.

"No, it's not!" Trebek exclaimed angrily back to him before K' decided to buzz in. "K' Dash?"

After chewing in nonsense over some beef jerky, K' decided to speak out.

"Yeah, what is acorn?" K' said to Trebek as the buzzer sounded on him.

"K' it's foods that end in 'acon', not 'acorn'!" Trebek snapped at him as he soon took a deep breath. "The answer was 'Bacon'!"

And then, Kyo suddenly buzzed in.

"You're too late, Mr. Kusanagi." Trebek spoke out to Kyo with a stern voice yet again.

"I was 'bacon' your mother last night!" Kyo exclaimed in the most teasing mood. Trebek on the other hand, wasn't pleased. "Yeah, you know how much she loved my sausage in her crossiant! POW!"

"Really? Did you just have to go there?" The host said, in a most un-amusing way. "I'm just gonna ignore you. I'll let K' go this time."

Hearing this, K' just decided to leave the studio altogether as Alex noticed this from afar.

"Wait, K'! Where are you going? You can't leave in the middle of the game!" Trebek exclaimed to the no-nonsense K', who felt like he had no use of being here.

"You said I can go!" K' exclaimed to him angrily as he refused to go to his podium.

"I don't mean it like that! You're still in the game! K' dash, you come back here immediately!" Trebek said to K' off-camera as he went to the stands to go sit far away from the contestants, "And he's now flipping me off. How family friendly of him... you know what, let's just-"

Trebek then was cut off by Soiree by a buzzer.

"What is it, Soiree Meira?" Trebek said to him.

"What is bacon?" Soiree shouted out loud.

"You haven't chosen a category yet! YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE A CATEGORY" Trebek said right at him, as the host was losing his patience for Soiree. Kyo then buzzed in on Trebek. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT, MR. KUSANAGI?"

"I'll take Boobies for $800!" Kyo exclaimed with a smile as Trebek felt cringed, angered and embarrassed by this.

"No, you will not!" Trebek shouted angrily at Kyo as he finally had enough, "Let's just forget this and just go to Final Jeopardy! The final category is 'Birds'! Write any kind of bird and you win! Write, NOW!"

The Final Jeopardy theme song started to play as Soiree and Kyo began to write in their answer. Trebek then began to shout at them angrily with force.

"Remember, you can draw any bird! You can draw a cardinal, a canary, or a robin of any kind! Just draw something you want! I'm pissed off and I want to hit the noose as fast as I can!"

The Final Jeopardy theme song finally ended when Soiree and Kyo were done writing in their wagers.

"Okay, since's K's no loner with us, I guess I'll-" Trebek began to say before he was cut off by K' who was sitting in the stands.

"I got an answer for ya, Trebek!" K' said out to Trebek as he flipped him off once again.

"K', flipping me off with the middle finger does not count as a bird!" Trebek said right to him, just fuming again.

"Here's what I wagered, semen-breath!" K' said out loud to him as he threw a load of pennies to Alex Trebek's face, much to his anger and disgust.

"That's good. Don't ever come here, again!" Trebek shouted angrily to K' as he began to approach Soiree's booth, "Okay, Soiree Meira, now that uncomfortable piece of s**t has come and gone, let's see what you wrote..."

Soiree's answer happened to be the word 'Taco'.

"You wrote down 'Taco'. May I remind you that it's a food, not an animal." Trebek said right to him as Soiree smiled right at him annoyingly, "Let's see what you wagered..."

Soiree's wager just happened to be the word 'bacon'.

"Bacon. Taco Bacon. That doesn't even make sense, Mr. Meira..." Trebek spoke to him, feeling very clueless.

"It will make sense one day. Taco Bacon will rule the world next to Cocaine Pops and Crack-flavored Gum! It's the main attractions, I keep telling you!" Soiree said, just laughing in Trebek's face constantly.

"I hope there's an insane asylum for people like you..." Trebek said right to Soiree as he began to approach Kyo's podium. "Okay, Mr. Kusanagi. The clue is birds, and you wrote down..."

Kyo's answer happened to be a picture of a bird in line form.

"You happened to write down a line that's shaped like a seagull." Trebek said as he still looked speechless, but managed to put down a smile, "Well, normally we wouldn't accept that, but since that line looks like a seagull, I guess we can take it. Very good job, Mr. Kusanagi."

"You're welcome, my dear good man." Kyo said to him with a questionable smile.

"Thank you, Mr. Kusanagi." Trebek said with a nod, "Now let's see what you wagered..."

Kyo's wagered just happened to be a picture of boobs.

"You managed to write boobs..." Trebek said looking very grimly of Kyo's wager.

"That's right. Bigger as your mom's butt! POW!" Kyo said, just teasing in Trebek's face once again.

"I assume so..." Trebek said in a very blunt silence as he looked at the camera, "That's all for Celebrity Jeopardy, I'm gonna try not to stab myself. Good day."


Kyo strikes once again! Who is safe from his destruction?

Read and review until the next chapter! BAZINGA!