I've been reviewing ByaSouthernLady's stories for some time now. I've been learning from her as well. As there are not a great many Romulan/Human Romance stories out there, she asked me to compose a suitable addition. I am a reader by nature and I tend to absorb the character traits of those I read about. Had I been reading about Jane Austin's Mr. Darcy, this story might have been far more elegant. Unfortunately, for her, I was reading Groucho Marx. Oh well, you play it as it lies. Please enjoy!

Diary Entry: My Hunk of Burning Love
Stardate: N/A

Dear Diary,

Life is beautiful!

My Hunk is beautiful. Well, he's not beautiful, he's steamy. He rocks! And he's all mine! So, I know you're wondering. Like, how did a beautiful, sexy, brilliant, fashionable, person like me catch a beef steak like this? I'm so glad you asked. OK, so it happened this way. Pay attention now 'cause when I get going you're gonna need a starship to keep up. Yep. I'm that good.

There I was standing on the deck of the Gasping Dolphin. For a starship, the Dolphin's a real dump. But, I had to be here. I mean Professor Feinstein made me.

My well-known and worlds-famous Galactic History teacher (a genius so I'm told) completely misunderstood my end-of-the-semester research paper. See, we had to write five pages on what we felt was the most important historical event covered during our class. I did ten because the topic just grabbed me and wouldn't let go.

So, I wrote about the most important historical event of our class. I turned it in. And... He flunked me! Me! He may be a genius, but I can't see it. I mean, like, you tell me. If you received an first class paper about the absolute best party of the year, how would you grade it? There were graphic descriptions, details of what everyone was wearing, and everything. And get this. I even compared it to each of the Seven Wonders of the World. I just think he was jealous because he didn't get an invitation. Some people are like that, you know.

So, here I am - another victim of our narrow-minded and backward-looking Federation. I shine forth like a Beacon of Enlightenment, a fresh new face plunging optimistically into Off-World Academia. And I get remedial work. What a way to spend the summer!

But I'm like that girl in Gone With The Wind. You know, the ancient Earth movie. Like, "Tomorrow is another day," you guys.

Anyway, enough about me. Back to My Hunk. So there I was, standing on the deck of the Gasping Dolphin. And, like, "Gasp!"

No, really guys, this ship comes tearing out of warp and attacks us. Oh My Gosh! People are screaming and running around. And I just stood there. Transfixed, you know. Cause the attacking ship was so adorable! It was this really cute shade of forest green and looked like a kind of macho bird. (Once, I thought about doing Art instead of History, but my Daddy said, "Girl, you can't do it all. The family coffers can't support it." Whatever that means. I'd say that it has to do with money (See, Professor, more History!) but we're in the Federation, baby! We don't use money! Besides, you know, if I did everything, it wouldn't be fair to the rest of the galaxy. I'm really very thoughtful like that.)

So, anyway. The ship started rocking 'cause we were being shot at. We couldn't shoot back since passenger freighters aren't armed. This Bolian chick next to me started screaming about how stupid that was. And I let her know that arming ships was how a lot of wars got started (See, I know lots of History. And like you know, just because I'm smart enough to know what's relev- But, never mind.) There were some crashes and explosions and there was smoke everywhere. And then, all of these figures beamed in coalescing in the light like magical moonbeams. There was dead silence. I mean you could have heard a credit drop. And then, serious "Gasp!"

I could see him clearly. He looked like the most darling little elf. Well, he wasn't really little. He was taller than me, but he had that cute look that small elves have (like in pictures). His ears had points and he had this cute little haircut. He was close enough to touch. Almost like he beamed into my arms. It was as if he was looking right at me and through me at the same time. Looking right into My Soul. He took my breath away. Honest. I couldn't help myself. His face, his lips, so close to mine (It was a scene right out of a movie!) I leaned forward and planted one right on his lips. I was gazing into his wide open eyes and he was gazing into mine. It was like Heaven or True Love. I don't know which would have been better. Of course, it might have been better if he had kissed back. I was about to suggest it to him in what would be our first, deep, intimate moment. And then...

I fell down! I was stunned for a moment. And then I realized that he must have, like, moved away by accident. There was a big crowd milling around. He was looking all over the place. I knew he had to be looking for me and he couldn't see me because of all that darned smoke. I had just enough presence of mind to grab onto his ankle.

He fell over! My poor Hunk! He said something in this foreign language and then his men came to help me up. They were a little rough but they were probably in awe over my great beauty. Plus they probably caught onto Our Connection. Then My Hunk came over looking like a great King and spoke right to me. I couldn't understand him but it was so forceful and majestic that I just looked at him trying to encourage him on with my eyes. He gazed into my eyes, entranced, I think. I'm sure he could feel it too. Then he said something else. And we became moonbeams together!


The next thing I know we're on the other ship. You know, the green bird. His men escorted me to my room while he strode off down the corridor looking so cute and handsome - even from the rear. So, I decided to think things out. I mean, I guess this means no more summer school. "No more pencils, no more books, no more teacher's dirty looks!"

I started thinking about his language. I remember, I had this friend girl that dated a Vulcan from Starfleet Academy. He was kind of cute - for a robot. But he spoke some real Vulcan for us once and it didn't sound like what My Hunk had said. OK, so if it wasn't Vulcan, then the only other alien elves I've heard of are Romulans.

Oohh... Carried off by an exotic hunky Prince! (I hope he's rich. That would make Daddy happy. He likes to say that I am High Maintenance. He's always going on about how we aren't related to one of those ancient royal lines. You know, like they used to have on Earth. Maybe he'd settle for an elf. They're a part of ancient Earth mythology. He won't need to worry, though. He'll just be happy that I'm married.)

Alright, so here I am on a Romulan War Bird with my own private room. And I know My Hunk will be here soon cause he wouldn't have brought me with him except to further the course of True Love. To think, it all started in one electric moment - a spark leaping joyously between our souls! We're just like Paris and Helen of Troy! Take that Professor Feinstein!

Oh... I'm so excited!

Good Night Dear Diary.
Sweet Dreams! I know I'll have them.

End Entry.