A/N: Thank you to ReadingBlueWolf, The Death Frisbee and Dauntless42 for reviewing the last chapter. Time for the official first chapter :) Also, fair warning: there's a lot of OC content in the following few chapters but nothing that will overpower the story. Most of the terms here will be explained later. Anywho, happy reading and all typos are mine :)


Chapter One: Internship Woes

"Base One to Base Three. You are clear for surveillance to Westoros…"

"Code Indigo Two One Two, we have a confirmed popularity drop in Narnia...

"Interest in Mortal Instruments has sparked sixty two percent in the Source…"

"Culturian Taos, entering Portal Sixty Five E from Hoth. I repeat, Hoth…"

"This is amazing," breathed fifteen-year-old Arin Sopho as she raked her eyes over the Hall of Communications.

"Indeed it is," replied her Guide, Jehenna, as they walked past the enormous glass dome that housed the area where Culturians overlooked the Canon worlds. "One day you'll be working as a Communicator," she continued, "And you will have to monitor the Contact between us and the Canon worlds."

Arin looked up at her in surprise. "But I thought we couldn't talk to Cano—"

"Well, of course we can't!" snapped Jehenna coming to a stop. "Honestly Arin, are your Culturian studies already slipped your mind? Didn't you learn about the Ancient Laws?"

Arin opened her mouth to speak but closed it in shame. Her cheeks reddened as she mentally slapped herself in embarrassment.

"What are the Ancient Laws, Arin?" asked Jehenna impatiently.

"The Ancient Laws are the first and only rules set down by the Early Culturians that decree that PopCultureVerse and CanonVerse must never meet in any form, shape or way," mumbled Arin, the answer that she was taught to memorize way back in EarlyPC School. An answer everyone was required to know by heart.

"And what will happen when PopCultureVerse and CanonVerse meet, Arin?" inquired Jehenna, her arms crossed.

"The very time and space of our world will be ripped apart and all of our universe will collapse and the fabric of civilization will dissolve while the Human World will become an empty shell of boredom and misery," Arin muttered.

"So how do we watch over the Canon Worlds?"

Arin had to rack her brains for that one. "We…uh… dispatch specially trained Culturians who observe Canons from a distance and send back important information."

Jehenna sighed. "Do we come in contact with them, Arin?"

"No. No we don't," Arin mumbled. It was the final part of the answer and the most important. Feeling ashamed of herself, Arin muttered an apology.

"Good. Now you must remember never to make such a rookie mistake. Imagine saying that in front of Madam Elizavetta!" said Jehenna.

Madam Elizavetta was the Head Culturian of PCV University. She overlooked all the Communications, the Coincidences, the Cliffhangers, the Fandom Popularity and Character Development. She also held the keys to the Dungeon of Antagonists where the souls of defeated antagonists would go after they were killed.

"I can imagine," muttered Arin under her breath. Absent mindedly, she began playing with a strand of her red hair as they began walking once again; this time to the Sue Chambers.

It was her first day as intern at PCVU. An internship was the step to being a certified a Culturian, the people who had access to observing the Canon Worlds.

Her mother had been a Communicator while her father was an expert on Source Studies. Arin's brother Treb was currently working in the Cliffhangers department where Culturians studied the cliffhangers and the effect they were having on the Audience (a hectic job considering the delay of the release of Mark of Athena.)

Arin, however, wanted to be something no one in her family has ever dreamed of.

A Canontraveler.

They were the ones who got to visit the Canon worlds and keep an eye on the characters from a distance. They would send annual reports of how the story was going and if they corresponded to the texts properly. Even though things like the Source and the Links gave Arin a headache, she was determined to pass the Test and become a Canontraveler.

Nevertheless, forgetting basic facts was not a good sign to say she was ready.

So sticking her head high, with her mandatory silver robe flying around her legs, Arin Sopho took a deep breath, preparing for the next part of her tour, the one that determined her place as a Culturian: the Test.


It wasn't until they ran into Madam Elizavetta herself did Arin realize how dangerous this job would be.

She was walking beside Jehenna returning from the Sue Chambers (where the Suekillers were having a field day— Breaking Dawn Part Two was on the way) and looking at portraits of famous sidekicks (Robin, Ron, Sam and company) when she collided head on with a woman in silver and red robes.

"Oh Gandalf, I'm sorry. I didn't see—" Arin's voice died as the woman she collided with straightened up.

The woman had skin the color of coffee and lush black hair with strands of beads hanging from her skull. Her eyes were the deepest shade of gold with flecks of green floating in them, like an ocean. But the most bizarre part of her was the enormous blue star tattoo on her left cheek- the mark of a Head Culturian. There was a Holo—computer the size of a small tube, courtesy of Foaly—hanging from her neck.

Immediately, Jehenna's head was nearing the ground as she breathed out a lame, "Madam Elizavetta!"

Arin tried to follow suit but she was a bit too distracted by the big blue tattoo.

"Uh, M-Madam Elizavetta! I'm so s-s-sorry, I—" Arin's words came to a shuddering halt as Elizavetta burst out laughing - which, coming from a three thousand year old woman was similar to a cat screaming.

"Oh, don't be sorry, dear," Elizavetta spoke in a deep, breathy tones that had hints of McGonagall-esque Scottish in it. "It's perfectly fine. People make mistakes and— Oh, for Gandalf's sake, Jehenna, there is no need to be in kissing proximity of the floor!"

Jehenna, red faced but still breathless, stood up with a muttered, "Sorry, Madam." Her cheeks were almost as pink as her tousled Afro.

Madam Elizavetta stood for a while, observing the pair when her eyes widened. "What's your name, dearie?" she asked Arin.

"Uh..." Arin felt like one of Apollo's cows, big, red and dumb. "A-Aron. Uh— I mean Arin! No, I mean—"

"Arin Sopho?" Elizavetta had a tone of surprise in her voice. "My, you've grown! Last time I saw you, you were just a little lump!"

Arin's cheeks reddened. "Y-yes, M'am," she managed to mumble.

"Well, where are you off to on this fine afternoon?" Elizavetta asked them, folding her arms in front of her chest.

Jehenna perked up, her blue eyes glittering. "Well I was just giving her a tour, Madam. She's got her Test today."

"Do you?" Elizavetta peered at Arin, sizing her up, "Well Arin, who's going to be your Instructor?"

"Uh, Madam Dereka, I believe," replied Arin as she fiddled with her silver dolphin earrings, a gift from her mother. It was amazing to think that she, a mere intern, was talking to a Head Culturian, the woman who helped craft most of PopCultureVerse. It was almost surreal.

"Hmm..." Elizavetta took a deep breath and for a moment Arin saw a look of grimness cross her cheerful face. "Today is the day," she muttered absently. "She must know today." Then as quickly as lightning, Elizavetta smiled again. "Well, Arin, darling— how would you want to go for a stroll with me? Just around the Merchandise Market?"

Arin's eyes widened as she digested the sentence slowly. A private stroll with the Head Culturian? Especially before the Test? Oh, Gandalf, it can't be possible.

Jehenna digested the information first. "However Madam, meaning no disrespect, but she has her Tes—"

She was promptly cut off by Elizavetta's exasperated sigh. "Oh— it won't be long Jehenna, just a little stroll to give her a taste of what it would be like as a Culturian. Now run along and forget you ever saw us."

To Arin's amazement, the last sentence spoken by Elizavetta had been differently said. She spoke it with a deep tone to her voice, the command like honey. Arin realised with a shock, Elizavetta was using the fairy 'mesmer.'

As Jehenna absently nodded and walked away, Elizavetta turned to Arin with a grim look on her face but quickly replaced it with a warm smile."Now," she said as she took Arin's thin hand, "Let's go for a quiet little walk, shall we? We have MANY things to discuss, I believe."

Still in disbelief, Arin absently nodded, not aware of how this walk wouldn't be 'little' nor 'quiet' by anyone's extent.


It had been three days since the breakout and as far as the figure knew, no one had suspected anything.

He sat at the head of the mahogany table, with the seven others taking places around him.

Lord Voldemort, the worst Dark wizard of the age stood tall and proud, his cold red slits surveying every one of his - he hated to say it - comrades. He, the great Voldemort, operated alone. But now, he had been forced to cooperate with what he was supposed to believe were the worst villains in the history of villains.

As if.

The Titan Lord Kronos - restricted to his body of Luke Castellan - was on the same page. He was a strict one-man-army. He did not appreciate taking orders from a noseless man who called himself a wizard, or a manic pixie who wanted to murder the Greek Goddess Artemis, or even the strange helmeted man who spoke as if he had had asthma. Bizarre, these things were. Not to mention the so-called vampires who sparkled. He actually had snorted when they called themselves the 'Volturi.' What a name.

He, however, did admire the woman who called herself Jadis, the White Witch, no matter how diabolically silly she was. After all, winter was solast millennia.

"So, Lord Voldemort," the figure at the head, still unnamed, commended. "Are the Dementers ready for attack?"

Voldemort did not appreciate being given orders to but he simply said, "They are."

The figure nodded, then turned to President Snow, the only non-magical person (apart from Vader who mastered the Force) in the group. "The Peacekeepers are set?" the figure asked him.

Snow paused to (much to everyone's revulsion) cough blood into a handkerchief before saying, "Fully armed." His snow-white beard glistened with droplets of crimson.

The figure grinned manically, trying to swallow an insane laugh. This was perfect, just a few more days and he'd control all of the Universe.

"Perfection," he said. "If the diversion goes as planned, they won't know what hit them." The figure failed and launched into a symphony of mad laughter with all the villains rolling their eyes.

"Bite me," muttered Jadis as her head connected with the mahogany table.

"Gladly," Jane from the Volturi replied as she stood up, much to groans from the others.

As the villains began arguing, the figure smiled to himself. It's time for payback Elizavetta, he thought, it's time to face the wrath of the League of Antagonists.


A/N: Thank you for reading and don't forget to REVIEW :) It would mean the world to me.

See you in Chapter Two (hopefully)

Peace, Love and Nutella! xx cuteypuffgirl