Alternate Universe

In another universe, where Kyuubey is a salesman while Homura and Madoka were married and wants nothing but to cuddle all day. Oh, let's not forget about Mami being the cook, Kyoko being a maid and Sayaka being a magica girl.


"Ding dong"

"Red girl get the bell!" Homura screamed from her room before bouncing back onto the bed and cuddle with Madoka.

"Yes ma'am." Kyoko sang and rolled towards the door, opening it. She looked let and right before looking down, to see a cat-like creature on the ground with a creepy smile plastered on its face.

"Ma'am, do you want to adopt a cat?"

"Cat?" Madoka rolled out of the bed and took the escalator down from the 609th floor and walked towards the door. Homura huffed and followed suit.

"Hi, I am Kyuubey and I just want to introduce you to this insurance. When you buy it, you can receive anything you want, but you have to pay a price; to be a magical girl."

Sayaka, Madoka's grandfather's son's daughter's mother's daughter's friend, sashayed from the living room, flipping a pancake and purred. "Anything I want?"

"Yes."

"I want to have big boobs."

"Please sign here to get it done and read the rules and regulations." The cat says.

Homura frowned, "this is a trap." She took out a gun she had stolen from Mami and tried to shoot but Madoka shook her head.

"A life is a life." Madoka said.

Homura sad.

Sayaka skimmed through the terms, "reading this is for pussy." Kyuubey snorted. She then signed.

Soon, she became a magica girl with big boobs and she went to attract the faggot who plays violin and marry him. Mami quitted from being a cook, and decided to make use of her talent to seduce people and give her money. tHere left was Kyoko, Homura and Madoka.

Kyoko shook her head. "I want to be a girl." And she bounced away.

"Homura, what do you want?" Madoka asked.

"I want nothing from this cat." Homura spat.

"Then I will. I want to be beautiful and strong." Madoka said.

"Sorry, according to the terms and conditions, there cannot be the word and in your request." Kyuubey said.

Homura interrupt, "Why are you making this wish?"

"Because I want to be like you. I felt that I can never be like you no matter what but in order to stand by your side, I must be strong and beautiful like you-"

Homura broke Madoka's sentence as she kissed her.

"You are strong and beautiful in my eyes." Homura whispered as she slammed the door, leaving Kyuubey standing outside. It swore it could hear them make out in the living room.

Kyuubey then continued walking down the street, finding more people who would like to be an insurance from it. Then she saw this green hair girl."

"Hi, I am Kyuubey and I just want to introduce you to this insurance. When you buy it, you can receive anything you want, but you have to pay a price; to be a magical girl."

"Anything I want?" Hitomi sniffed.

"Yes."

"I want bigger boobs than Sayaka."

So in the end, Homura and Madoka eloped to another universe where the timeline of hatred starts, Kyoko continued bouncing throughout the world and Sayaka became depressed as Hitomi won faggot's heart by having bigger boobs. Mami robbed a bank and live happily ever after.

Moral of the story: Don't open the door. Don't even leave your room.