This was made for my beautiful little Bas, whose birthday is today. She is the Sebastian to my Kurt and I just love her to the deathaura. I say this because this whole thing was made with the song Deathaura inspiring it. Sonata Arctica is brilliant. My Bas is WaitingForAKiss here, so go give her a kiss and a heart. Oh no, wait, I think she already has mine. THIS HAS A MENTION OF DARK CHOCOLATE OKAY.
Warnings for bloodshed, slight suicidal implications and violence. May be trigger-y but I don't know how.
Title: An Everlasting
Rated: +13 – language, some hints
Summary: AU. In a new world after World War III, a species of vampire rise up and mate with the person they make the most physical contact with. Sebastian Smythe is a vampiric spirit trapped inside of a human's body that must suffer the fact that he may not mate with anyone but a boy named Kurt Hummel, a distant memory of a past Sebastian wants to forget. Kurtbastian.
They said that the world would end with a bang, but it ended with a tremble.
They didn't know what happened but Sebastian knew most of the story. He'd never been human once in his life, and he'd always been a vampire. They lived in secret communities, and one of the colonies was called the Force. They used the word force only because they were aware that in physics, force was simply mass multiplied by its acceleration. Mass was in kilograms, acceleration was in metres per second squared, and Sebastian was a physicist major. He grew up at around times of Galileo who said that if an object had no force, and was given a push, it will move in a constant speed forever. Sebastian didn't remember much of the sixteenth century, other than washing his hands repeatedly until they were raw and red and reciting religious prayers under his breath whenever something happened. He was there when they called Galileo insane. He said that the earth revolved around the sun.
Sebastian would then realise that the sun, was simply in the form of a boy – just one boy, with soft blue eyes. He'd remembered Kurt from eons before, just glancing at him from where he stood at the top of the church. Sebastian didn't remember why he liked observing people on top of churches. He always thought that he was closest to God when he was seeing what he'd created, on a mantel that was supposed to be for worship. It was only when Kurt looked up to see him, with eyes glittering soft, glassy and blue, as clear as glass, reflecting only the light of the sun that Sebastian began to believe that the sun was in Kurt. It was such a strange thought, but it seemed to fit too perfectly.
Sebastian had always told people he was in love with the sun, when really he had some sort of fascination with the boy. He knew his name was Kurt, but he never said his name. He watched Kurt marry a landlady named Adeline. They seemed to be in love. He held her coat. He gave her roses and sung merry songs. Sebastian realised that if Kurt was the sun, then surely he needed a moon, but Addy was no moon. She took away all the sunshine from his eyes. Soon after, Kurt began to see the signs of sadness in those gleaming heavy blue eyes. Those blue eyes filled with so much misery that it made Sebastian feel only iciness at the pitch of his stomach once he'd realised how broken Kurt was.
Kurt was executed because of his disbelief his God before his baby was even born. That wouldn't matter because Adeline would die of childbirth and the baby would die three weeks after.
Sebastian can remember seeing Kurt's body hit the ground, lifeless. The death was quick, painless even. Even with that knowledge, Sebastian would never forget how the blood slowly trickled down Kurt's neck, but most of all, he would not forget that standing there. Kurt stood there, glanced one more moment at Adeline whom was shaking, gave a nod to her direction. His face was stoic, bleak, his lips pressed together in a tight, thin line. His Father stared back at him. Sebastian never knew the man's name, but he shared the same set of eyes, and was portly. Kurt looked up into the sky, the sun reflecting in his eyes, and then then the rope finally tightened around his neck. Those beautiful eyes shut, and then the world turned to stone. Sebastian would only remember that the sun died.
Nobody really understood what he meant, some of them tried their petty guesses, thinking they were riddles, but it was a memory. A secret and secrets only existed if it was undisclosed. Sebastian would realise that wasn't true, because he'd always told people the sun died such a long time ago. Sebastian wrote and read, but seldom left the church walls considering there was nothing left to see. He died a death of a man of God. Loving, with many men whispering about how much of a loss it was to lose a man of great faith, prayers and flowers.
Sebastian came back, as most vampires did, rebirthed after his birth. This new century and land never knew him. Sebastian most of his new existence wondering if God existed, and then he saw a boy with beautiful hard brown eyes. He stared at him for most of the time, picking the parts that seemed a lot like Kurt. The micrometre was invented. Sebastian liked how precise it was. He dreamed of measuring each individualized curl on the boy they called Blaine. Blaine meant yellow as Sebastian had spoken Gaelic for the majority of his lifespan. Yellow reminded him of eggs, but Blaine reminded him of honey because of the hard consistency in his eyes. Blaine died peacefully in Sebastian's arms. With a vial of blood and a carefully placed incision of teeth with the use of the micrometre, Sebastian panned out the force of the much darker vampire blood on Blaine's body. He'd done this to Kurt too, but neither worked. Unlike most vampires, Sebastian admired mortality.
Sebastian remembered waiting, staring for day in and day out for any sign of awakening, but the last thing Sebastian remembered of Blaine was that his knuckles were as white as Kurt's face when he'd died. Sebastian caressed Blaine's cheek, once, twice. He died yet again, but this death was more peaceful. He was ready to transit in the newer century. The newer century was a lonely century, but Sebastian found out they invented a match. He had lit his first candle, and then he prayed. He prayed, and he prayed and when he opened his eyes, he could see that beyond a window, a pair of soft blue eyes were glittering underneath the sultry moon. Sebastian had moved towards the window and only then, did he realise that the Earth truly did revolve around the sun.
For the first time ever, that was when Kurt's eyes first stared up to look at Sebastian. Kurt's smile was weak, but it shone more than any sun ever could. Sebastian realised Kurt was still poor, as poor as dirt, and had invented him in. Kurt had only wanted food. The starved, malnourished body looking for any source of comfort. He had practically all but demolished three bowls of stew and four thick rolls of bread before Sebastian had asked him if he wanted tea. Kurt's eyes widened and he nodded his head, eager to try the newest inventions that they had up to 1904. Sebastian graced Kurt's cheek with his hand. That was the first time Kurt spoke. He told him about dreams, constellations and his indifference towards God even after all of these centuries. Sebastian and him had gone through four cups of tea, and Sebastian had bought Kurt an invention made two years ago called a teddy bear. Kurt adored it. He slept with it for the most part.
They spent most of their days together. When Kurt had caught Sebastian praying to God to take away these beautiful, forbidden feelings he had for Kurt, Kurt had walked in, and almost just as quickly, his cheeks were sodden with tears. Then came the screaming, the anger, Kurt had called Sebastian's faith in God irrelevant and ridiculous, Sebastian had fired back things just as dark and sinister, and then Kurt left, and ran. Soon after, the Spanish flu pandemic caught out, spreading like a match lit on fire. Sebastian went to bed every night, remembering how the blood used to seep down Kurt's neck.
He found Kurt days after. He was coughing. Hospitals were full. He was alone, and on the streets, scolded from the rest of the world, with only a scarf as his weapon against harsh weather changes, pneumonia had left him nearly weightless, and the fever had gone to unimaginable heights. His arms were protecting his body, and he had very rarely slept. Sebastian sat from the top of the church, looking down at Kurt, whom barely looked up and when he met with Sebastian's eyes, he just curled up even tighter, as if protecting himself even more, as if Sebastian was the virus causing him the flu. Kurt was still so beautiful, so human – the Force, or so he called the other vampires like him, in his mind, had told him that this was his true vice, that he was trying to give humans immortality.
One day, Sebastian had just been watching him sleep, but his sleep escalated into days and then he had went down to him, only to realise the skin was as thick as rubber. He laid down the body, and had laid down dead roses and whatever scraps he could find beside him. Then he gave him that small teddy bear that was named after a vague colour that Sebastian could not remember. And with that, he found the vial and the micrometre and started again. He refused to see Kurt rot. For days on end, his only focus was finalizing the formulae he'd worked on year after year. He hated biology and he despised chemistry. He tried to do as much as possible, being the physicist that he was, and then after he'd administered the blood dosage, he realised he could do nothing more.
Sebastian had never realised what the term "kiss of a century" meant, until he leaned forward and had allowed his lips to softly caress Kurt's own. It was the first kiss he'd ever had. They were both out-casted, different, revolting to their own kind. Sebastian was pulled out from the Force for years. He was a vampire, but he'd always been made to be rebirthed into a human's body. In true essence, he was a vampire caged in this mortal body, as a punishment for finding these humans so damned interesting.
That was when his existence had come to a halt. Returning back every century had left him restless. He lost his faith somewhere along the lines. The candles were unlit. He saw people die, get murdered, helplessly. He was of no help. Then he saw Blaine, but somehow, Blaine was a less painful memory than Kurt, so Sebastian strived after Blaine when his heart was always set on the sun. He had heard of him, facts, dates, but he had truly met him. His heart had become as cold as ice, and as black as the night. He became an empty vessel. He came to hate everything that he'd once loved – humans, love, physics, devotion, religion. He'd lost all of that in so little time that he'd lost most of himself along with it. They told him that he was narcissistic, cold, ruthless, disgusting, revolting, and he had only quipped back with icier comments, attacking them like the plague had in the new world they now called America.
Sebastian could not remember the rest of the days. They all seemed to repeat themselves, one over the other. His skin was a rigorous pale when it used to be healthier. His eyes were soul-sucking and demanding. His knuckles were snow-white, and his mouth was thin. He had lost all point in life, and preferred to watch things and hate them. He hated everything for being happy and beautiful. He hated sleeping. He hated eating. He hated needing to do anything. He barely slept, barely ate, refusing to succumb to bodily functions. He hated that humans relied on eating, or sleeping, or any of that. He'd rather have a set of bloodshot eyes, and a few bones popping from underneath his bones than prove that he was weak. He had been weak for far too long and the only strength he can revel in was his inconsistent schedule. This new century was a lot less strict, and put him into a foster home when they found out he lived alone. He was adopted. His new family loved him, and bought him things. His Mother loved feeding him and his bed was welcoming to sleep in.
When they realised he barely slept, barely ate and barely did anything but stare at the wall, his new Mother lectured him and told him to sit down and fall asleep. She forced him in the room for a good eight hours. Sebastian slept for a total of three of those hours, and felt humiliated for needing that sleep. He didn't need anything. He didn't need anyone. His body only took so much before it completely collapsed. Sebastian couldn't remember the rest of the weeks. They fed him through a tube and sedated him if he didn't want to sleep. He still looked tired, sick, and malnourished even after they discharged him. When his Mother made him tea, Sebastian drank it, and felt sharp jabs of pain across his stomach, as memories of Kurt curled up in that corner, sick, lifeless, nearly dead, cold, with nothing more than just that small scarf, that small stained bloodied scarf around his neck. He found Kurt again, in the mirror staring back at him with vacant green eyes.
He saw Kurt, and then he saw Blaine, together, laughing. It was nearly beautiful, but the kind of beautiful that made Sebastian want to projectile vomit. He was always told that if the acceleration of an object was directly proportional to the force that causing it, so Sebastian was the force and Klaine was the object accelerating towards a break-up. They did not realise who he was, completely rebirthed and re-implanted with new parents, real parents, but the same characteristics. Blaine still had eyes as beautiful and as thickly sweet as honey and Kurt was still the sun…and that thought made Sebastian want to tear out every bit of his hair until he was bald. He wanted to slice off his bones like it was made out of cartilage and rubber. Sebastian came from nothing and had nothing. For the first time since he'd been kicked out of the colony, he'd never craved human blood just as much. He craved it because in the end, he wanted them all dead.
Come a few years later, he'd gotten his wish when a new war, World War III, had begun. The Force had grown stronger, and then the armies came in and invaded earth. The folklores and beasts that people laughed at had become very real. Soon, the entire human population and existed was wiped out – all but Sebastian, whom was still entrapped in an immortal mortal body, still caged in the pits of this despair. Sebastian watched the human population suffer, turning, blood straining skin, and bones jutting as flesh slowly turned, twisting, crippling to make the newborns. The newborns had all knowledge of their human life. The Force wanted them to remember how powerless and futile they all were, how under the control of the Force they had become. The Force demanded mating, physical mating, and every winter solstice, all vampires of age were to mate. When vampires mated, they mated forever. It ran deeper than blood, colder than snow, and was more gruesome than death.
They mated with the vampire they made the most physical contact with. Sebastian had made stories of his conquests, but he was a virgin whom had never found any interest or appeal in real sex, just how crude it was, playing it around to human's revolt – but now, the winter solstice was approaching. The barren will suffer, the non-mated off-springs and those of age were going to die an eternal death, and Sebastian did not care about death. He welcomed it with open arms, but when the Mass (a group of vampires who announced the two that would mate) had made the list. Sebastian had seen the name and so had Kurt. Their eyes spun into a quick dance, and the sun glinted off Kurt's eyes. Sebastian felt nothing for him. He felt nothing at all for the raging fury in his eyes that slowly ebbed away into realization, panic and fear.
Kurt didn't understand why. He'd kissed Blaine. He'd been together with Blaine for nearly a year and a half. Sebastian had never told him of all the times they embraced each other centuries back, of the tea, the stew, the laughter, of the small adorable teddy bear – vaguely called a colour, yellow, was it? Blaine, the teddy bear must have been called Blaine. They had spent an entire century together, but most of all Sebastian would never tell him that in all the centuries he'd lived, he'd only had once kiss and that was when he'd captured Kurt's blue, cold lips during the pandemic, and sealed the pain with nothing more than a kiss as soft as snow.
Kurt had found himself walking alongside of Sebastian for at least thirty minutes. His hand had held onto Sebastian's wrist, and Sebastian held back onto Kurt's. They walked aimlessly, never meeting each other's eyes, thrown together by the system. Kurt then asked him, in a view devoid of curiosity, but full of spite, "so this is your kin? Your family?"
Sebastian snorted, laughable. All of it. His Mother had been quick to trade him for blood, and his Father had decided that he was useless. Family was not quite the term for these creatures of disgust, but Sebastian ended up shaking his head and then burst into laughter. "They are not my kin," Sebastian glowered darkly at Kurt's eyes. "If anything, I despise them more than I've ever despised anything on this earth, including you. Yes, some crazy vampire bitch sprouted me out of her vagina and sold me for a vial of blood to work as a slave in a vampire colony called the Dispute."
Kurt had shifted slightly, running a finger over Sebastian's knuckles. Sebastian shuddered at the coldness of Kurt's hand moving towards his warm skin. "You're human." Kurt realised with full shock. Had it been years since he'd realised humans existed. Kurt looked up to see Sebastian's eyes, whom had nodded slowly, but didn't choose to comment on that.
"How?" Kurt quickly asked. "They killed—"
"Sixteenth century," Sebastian cut him off to tell the tale in the most sardonic way possible. "They decided that my ideas and theories were revolting so they cast me out into the open human society imprisoned in a human body. I am a vampiric soul in a body. I crave blood but my body rejects it so I am inclined to feed off human food and drink, which still exists in the Force to this date. New babies born from vampire-turned women are still human, they gain mortality. The Force takes them to the Dispute to work as slaves, and when they're old enough, they will kill them after the fear had settled in, to cause them from forming a resistance against the empire. There is still real human food here as long as women keep on birthing."
"Do you eat it?" Kurt slowly asked, eyes on Sebastian's jutting collarbones peaking from underneath the black coat he was wearing.
"No," Sebastian truthfully answered. "What is the point of eating if there is no joy in it? In sleeping? In living? It is a endless void of an existence. I do not care about dying if I don't mate, Hummel, but because of your Virgin Mary scared little ass, you're gonna let me marry you and have ten kids to keep yourself alive. What's the point? Why do you still hope? There is no resistance, there is only the force. You are practically in a vacuum. The thought of these people fighting against the Force is like the thought of throwing an object in a vacuum and waiting for it to accelerate due to gravity. There is no air resistance in a vacuum, all objects fall at the same point in time. The Force has become law, fact, and science."
"It doesn't mean—"Kurt was cut off by Sebastian.
"Hope means faith," Sebastian cut him off hastily. "And you do not believe in God, Hummel. You do not believe that there is a bigger power than can wipe out the whole of the Force. Do you?"
Kurt looked down at his shoes.
"Do you?" Sebastian repeated, voice demanding.
"I hope because it's safe," Kurt blurted out. "Because if I don't hope, then what do I have to live for exactly?"
Sebastian laughed. "Thank you, Hummel! Nothing! We all live for nothing! You're all insane, and so stupid and naïve! Trying to cling onto something but there's nothing. Nothing is safe. Not hope, not faith, not…" Sebastian's eyes filled with some sort of realization, 'not love."
Kurt stared at him, seeing a sudden jut of dark emotion in Sebastian's eyes as he placed a hand on Sebastian's cheek.
"…to all, feeding time has commenced. You are allowed to now go off and hunt any animal and kill it off from the Torch cage in Unit 5 for blood…for nobler upper-class vampires, turn to the Dispute to feed off human blood...thank you."
The Force then added on.
"To all vampires, disregard the first message as the Delilah had finally woken up." A series of gasps filled the colony. Kurt looked up at Sebastian whom had explained with his hands that Delilah was an old vampire that was also a witch who'd fallen comatose for centuries, and she told premonitions that were always true. "In her words, she had asked about the kingdom we had built. She called it extraordinary, but such a shame, a dear shame, because it will fall. She had said that an outside force will accelerate the colony to its own disruption and make it crash on the weight of its own mass and velocity. Until then, all feeding is to be supervised by the Force's army. We will announce when it is safe to feed."
But nothing was safe. Kurt looked up at Sebastian, curling up his lip inward. "What?" Sebastian said snippily. "Are you going to hope that any of that bullshit that existed centuries ago is true?"
Kurt looked up at Sebastian. "I'm hungry." He simply stated his own dismay, placing a hand on his aching stomach. He needed the blood and the feedings were regular but they were always supervised. In a way, the Force could've done worse by starving them and making them do labour work, but they let them live as long as they abided by the rules. The Force had changed with time as well.
Sebastian had looked at Kurt, and cut a silver of his skin using the sharpest object he can find in the distance of the scolded region, allowing him to feed on his blood as much as possible. Those retractable fangs sinking into his skin, drinking hot, warm blood. Kurt stopped after a while, not full off the blood, satiated. "Don't you want anymore? You look like you're going to chew off your own leg," Sebastian added on, with a quick roll of his eyes.
Kurt shook his head. "I may despise your being, Sebastian, but I don't want you dead."
"That is the most beautiful thing I've ever heard," Sebastian said. Kurt realised, in full shock, there was no spite in Sebastian's voice, or sarcasm, only pure truth. Kurt shifted slightly, placing a hand on Sebastian's shoulder and pulling himself closer to him. Sebastian looked down at him and Kurt had seen sudden emotion behind those eyes, an emotion that Kurt didn't read because he didn't want to but he knew that emotion all along. Sebastian was lost, completely confused, and even a little scared. As soon as Kurt deciphered it, they were gone under a curtain of apathy and that was that.
Sebastian had become to realise that the blood thirst was increasing rapidly with Kurt. He wanted more and more blood as the days worn on. Whenever he was allowed to, he drank and drank and drank the quantity that usually filled three or four more vampires than usual. Sebastian had come to realise that Kurt's bloodlust was bought on by drinking once from his blood. That was how they ended up here again, with Kurt sucking off Sebastian's blood as if it were a sugary lollipop. Those innocent blue eyes flickering up towards him as Sebastian laid a hand on Kurt's hipbone.
Kurt finally laid on top of Sebastian's lap, pulling his mouth towards his neck, as he licked and suckled on the skin. Sebastian could not stop Kurt now. This was true mating. Mating that was driven because of nothing more than physical need. Kurt had snapped off the buttons off Sebastian's coat, pulling it off. The other layer was quick to slide off Sebastian's frame. Sebastian waited for Kurt to do something, but there was a rapid concern gleaming in his eyes. Sebastian didn't realise why for a moment. Kurt raked his finger raked across one of Sebastian's prominent ribs, causing Sebastian to realise why. He snorted but Kurt seemed confused. He pressed his head against Sebastian's ribcage. He didn't say anything or cry. Sebastian didn't know what to feel as he allowed his fingers to go through Kurt's hair.
Somehow, in an hour, Kurt was on top of Sebastian. Kurt played with the zipper of Sebastian's pants as he asked. "Why do you always look like shit? Your eyes are always bloodshot, your skin makes mine appear rosy and your protruding bones are hitting a sharp edge against my body."
"I detest needing things." Sebastian murmured. "I do not need to sleep, or eat, or do any of that shit."
Kurt raised an eyebrow as he pulled himself upwards, staring at Sebastian's eyes. "You are mad," Kurt announced, voice high and full of shock. "I always knew you were horrendous, but I never knew you were completely and utter insane."
Sebastian placed a hand on top of Kurt's cheek, brushing it. Kurt liked this, caught in sensation and physical touch before he shook his head and pushed Sebastian away from him. "No, Sebastian," he said, voice dark. "You are not getting out of this talk. You will go to bed and when you wake up ten or even three days from now, you will eat a three-course dinner."
"Are you listening?" Kurt snapped.
Sebastian shook his head, amusement still in his eyes. "How can you be stupid to believe that I can sleep for that long or eat that much at this current moment?"
Kurt was thrown back by that question. The look on Kurt's face was almost as if Sebastian had just slapped him. It made Sebastian feel so wrong for being so in control of his bodily functions. Kurt shook now, first with shock, but then with complete fury, as he looked up at Sebastian and then out of the moment, out of all of the emotions, Kurt struck Sebastian across his face. Sebastian looked up at Kurt, whom was still shaking as hot tears spilled from his eyes.
"No, Sebastian," he said, as if he was instructing a child. "No."
Sebastian slowly nodded his head. And almost just as quick, Kurt had pulled Sebastian into his arms, patting his back. Sebastian did not know how to react or what to say so he just nuzzled into Kurt's shoulder, as Kurt ran his fingers through Sebastian's hair, his dull, lifeless hair that held no sheen or shine. Kurt pulled Sebastian's chin up so that he can look into Kurt's eyes. "Why do you make me do this?" Kurt asked, eyes filled with nothing more than sadness.
"Come here," Kurt pulled him close, running his hand through his hair. "Come here."
Kurt held him close and ran his fingers through his hair. He did not like his bloodshot eyes. He did not like his dull hair. He did not like the jutting bones over the soft skin, but he still held him all the same.
Sebastian Smythe had never felt more loved in his life.
Sebastian had never had breakfast made for him before. It was such a beautiful thing, as beautiful as breathing. He'd never been served by a vampire before, never counted on it, but Kurt was standing there. He said that this smelled nice. It had been so long until Kurt had actually had a craving for real food, but he enjoyed food just as much. It never 'filled' him, nor did it mean anything to his body. It was like a human drinking soda, it was enjoyable, but had little value to the body. He needed the blood like he needed water, like a mortal being needed food to survive, no matter how little. Sebastian had stabbed his stuffed mushroom, watching the filling spill onto the fork. It got him excited, as if he was a child playing with Mickey Mouse shaped pasta.
The mushroom was stuffed with ricotta, cream cheese, and Parmesan, and there was a sprinkle of black pepper from what he'd seen in the mash of white against his fork. He ate, and when he ate, he wanted more. Kurt was glad to feed him. They spent the morning, from six am to ten am, just making food and Kurt watching Sebastian eat. The banana bread that was toasting in the oven, French toast topped with apple slices, oat-based cereal bars with bits of fluffy marshmallows and dark chocolate and scrambled eggs with sautéed mushrooms. By the time that Sebastian had eaten all of that, he was sure he was going to be full forever, but the kind of full that was nice. His stomach felt uncomfortable completely for the first fifteen minutes but sitting with Kurt made him forget about the twisting pain in his stomach. The food was enticing and the smell was just perfect, and it led him to eat and eat food that his body could not bear the weight of.
"It's not a need," Kurt said, putting a finger towards Sebastian's lips. "It's a pleasure." He told him.
"Pleasure," he tasted the word on his lips, and then smirked.
Kurt blushed, realising that Sebastian's mind had completely gone to the gutter in moments. Sebastian gave Kurt a shot of a fake apologetic look before he leaned closer and captured Kurt's lips on his own, kissing him deeply. Kurt responded. Sebastian had always been about physical touch. It was a need, a necessity, for Kurt to kiss him, or mate with him, but Kurt had never had sex with him, and that confused Sebastian. "The greatest pleasure in the world," Sebastian began, 'is knowing that you've saved someone from a tragic fate, even if they'll never know it."
Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Of course," he rolled his eyes. "You saved my butt by agreeing to have sex with me. That helps."
"And the greatest pain is watching the sun die," Sebastian said, voice steady, as he looked into Kurt's eyes, glassy, but reflected nothing but the light in the room and even then, the reflected light shone too bright to be a part of this universe. He remembered the first execution, the blood dripping from Kurt's neck, and this led him to remember his first kiss with a dead Kurt, whose body was diseased, starved, broken beyond repair, grey, with a sickly pallor to his skin and lay lifeless in his arms due to nothing but a mere flu. The Spanish flu had led him to a burning pit of pneumonia and he'd saved the sun. Like Galileo, he would die for the truth…the earth would always around the sun as long as stars still glittered in the sky and his heart was as cold as ice.
"I'm sorry," Kurt said, eyes lowering down.
"What did you say?" Sebastian raised an eyebrow, as he met with Kurt's slightly ashamed eyes.
"I'm disgusting," he groaned. "Absolutely disgusting!" his hands flew up in the air, as he looked at Sebastian's pale face, gaunt from anaemia. Sebastian shut his eyes. His arms were criss-crossed with wounds, bite-marks and Kurt felt the need to vomit. He'd done that. He'd hurt Sebastian like that, and that was never acceptable. "Listen, Hummel," Sebastian pulled himself up slightly, sitting up but even then he looked dizzy from lack of blood loss. "Just…give me a few months."
"You look so weak," Kurt pulled himself away, suddenly aware of how grey Sebastian's skin was, and how shaky his arms were. His body was involuntarily shaking because of how little blood he had, just barely enough to survive and Kurt was disgusted that after all of this, he was still hungry for more. The winter solstice was approaching. In a few days, they will be bound together forever, and Kurt didn't think Sebastian would survive a year with him, not when Kurt had such a ravenous bloodlust for him. "So small," Kurt murmured. His cheeks were suddenly sodden.
"I thought you hated me—"
"I do not wish for anyone's death," Kurt said, his voice thick. "I am not sick, Sebastian."
Sebastian laughed. It was the kind of laugh that came out from insane people, the kind of laugh that was bitter and never stopped. "Do you really want to know, Hummel? Do you?" he shook his head, humour and bemusement still in his eyes. His voice was abnormally giddy. "You're about the only person that doesn't wish for my death! Lovely, isn't it?!"
Kurt shook his head, as he bit down his lips. "No," his voice was soft. "Sebastian, that's not fair. You have done nothing."
Sebastian glared at Kurt. "Everything," he cut him, swallowing his throat. "I've done everything. In search of a fantasy."
Kurt looked up at him, and past the emptiness, he saw something dark in those eyes, a darkness that can only be spun by pain. "What fantasy?" Kurt suddenly questioned, furrowing his eyebrows together.
He groaned. "I had a fantasy that I can make humans immortal," he laughed now. "Lovely how things work out. I despise this body now. I despise everything."
"Did you succeed?" Kurt murmured.
Sebastian looked up at Kurt. "The thing about immortality, Hummel, something you wouldn't understand, is that if you're rebirthed and you know that no matter what, you're just going to come back again, live life over and over again, then it becomes boring, repetitive and disgusting. I wanted to give mortals salvation, eternity, but you cannot play or cheat with Death. He will always find a way to break your wishes and turn them into ashes. I never wanted to live forever, but I do, and now, I spend all of my eternity in constant pain. I gain no deeper understanding of the world. Nothing is profound. It is only a thin layer masking itself on nothing more than gore, shit, piss, blood, and vomit. My intentions were cruel and unforgiveable and I pay for it every single day of my life."
Kurt was thrown back right now, as he looked at Sebastian. "You succeeded."
Sebastian slowly nodded his head.
"What's his name?"
Sebastian snorted. "Blaine Anderson," and with that, he looked at Kurt's eyes, whom was confused. "He died in my arms," he snorted. He felt nothing for Blaine. Blaine barely existed in his memory. He was always just a substitution. He was just honey, sweet, thick, but too much can make him feel like throwing up. In all of its essence, it was just bee vomit, and nothing special.
"I hate honey," Sebastian said after a while. He was talking about the food product, but he couldn't be bothered with the person either. He didn't know what happened to Blaine, but he wondered how such chocolate eyes can remind him of honey sometimes.
Kurt smiled weakly. "There goes the recipe for those pancakes then."
Delilah's premonition had led to a hunt for the one that will befall the corruption and to that, the winter solstice emerging was a dark date. Everywhere Kurt went, there seemed to be armed forces. He'd seen Sebastian's Mother, and if beauty had a name, then she would be that name. They can tell that snow was due any day now with the harsh cold weathering climate. Sebastian enjoyed snow, but Kurt found it futile and pointless. Then, a day just before the solstice, they found him. It was Blaine whom was supposed to lead the corruption of the land, a 'witch' they'd call him, a traitor of blood, and was slain in a beat of a moment. Sebastian wanted to bring him but that would mean pain and endless suffering so he did not. He just watched Blaine, almost asleep. The blood trickled from Blaine's neck, eerily reminding him of Kurt's death.
Kurt stared at his fallen boyfriend. They were now rid of the curse harbouring the land. Sebastian knew in some part of him, that he almost was the reason for a revolution. The dismay of death hung closely to their hearts, casting shadows in ways they could not understand. It was Blaine, but he could just not be dead. His neck snapped, beheaded, bloodied; decapitation and execution lay heavy on the land. It was only then that Sebastian realised that his stoic nature was a matter of revolt, to think that once he'd wanted this boy more than he'd wanted the world was a laughable matter. Sometimes, he came back. They hung him, to make an example of traitors. He was almost an omen, a sign for Sebastian that something was falling apart – maybe one day he'd realise that it was everything. Blaine's death had only caused a revolution to twist.
There was no safety, nothing. There was only the Dispute rising. Blaine was one of them; Blaine was almost like the father of these parentless children. They rebelled. Sebastian just wanted to laugh, a bitter laugh, because Blaine wouldn't be alive if it wasn't for him, and Blaine's death caused millions to suffer in agony. He had indirectly fuelled agony upon souls that knew nothing but sadness and suicide, all for a fantasy. He watched his Mother die, and he felt nothing for her. His Father was decapitated. An army fought for dominance, and the Dispute wanted freedom, wanted to recreate the humane existence that was once theirs, flourishing and inviting vampires and humans to work together once and for all, live in peace.
We are human slaves that were never allowed to see the outside world, that grew only to be killed off for blood, and our blood may be part of your diet, but humans eat animals and even they have lived in harmony together. We can turn back; create something better, bigger, and more eloquent. We can be the revolution.
The revolution twisted, turned into an upheaval of blood and gore. Sebastian knew that it would not be safe. It was never truly safe. The Dispute fought back with violence, finding a way to end vampiric immortality. It was not safe for Kurt. The end of vampiric immortality was turning vampires against each other by envy, injecting a pathogenic substance in the air that had left the land in nothing but bloodshed and disruption and even then, they decided to go with winter solstice rule. Kurt refused to mate with Sebastian under the order, and Sebastian, even though he felt pain when Kurt had said those words, had fought back too. It was getting too much.
The land was beautiful. The pathogenic envy created beautiful flowers, beautiful grass, anything that lived and congested it rivalled for a darker perfection. The land, whilst it was full of bloodshed, had the environment of a surreal dream. The grass always greener, the sky bluer, and the sun shone. It shone but Sebastian realised it was a shine of death. The trees grew taller, to abnormal heights that broke buildings, flowers twisted into lovely lengths and beautiful scents that covered up the scent of decay. With each dying, passing soldier, the world decomposed it far too quickly. Children vampires feared their lives, and colour took their breaths away. They wanted to go play outside but feared death.
Sebastian was one of those children, amongst them, colour took his breath away too, but mostly, he was afraid to go out and play because memories of love entrapped between those. He can hear things in the wind, beautiful things, chanting him, to be better, thinner, prettier, perfect – that he didn't need anything, or anyone, and slowly, Sebastian realised that his biggest envy was nothing more than the sun itself.
Sebastian had seen what envy had done to people, good people. It had turned them into monsters that strived to be better, murders that killed off those who they were envious of, striving for an unlimited amount of perfect. The Dispute realised the horrors of this, because they did not think that the world would be so far gone in. They had no realised the power of bacteria that multiplied in seconds. They had no idea what they created. Sebastian had always found the idea of creating mass interesting, because mass cannot be created or destroyed but they had. They'd created a mass, a deadly one and unleashed it, and now, the world was breaking.
When Kurt had moved towards him, he was angry. He was furious. Sebastian sat down and looked up at him, eyes stinging with tears.
"You did this, didn't you?" Kurt's voice was cold. "How much of in denial are we in, Sebastian? To be able to create a deadly mass that will accelerate and strike back at the Force…who else is a physicist? You have all the motives. This was for revenge. You wanted to wipe them out and create immortal humans. That's why you were cast out, wasn't it? It was a lie. You…you victimised yourself. You disgusting, horrific being—"
Sebastian cut him off, as he looked back up at Kurt. "I wanted to make perfection," his voice was so sincere, and he laughed. "A perfect a lot like me. A perfection that didn't need anything."
"Well, you certainly don't need me," Kurt murmured, as he was just about to leave when Sebastian had gripped tightly onto his wrist.
"The world is dying!" Kurt exclaimed, as he turned around and then shook with fear, revolt, horror and complete and utter betrayal. "We will all die, Sebastian. What have you accomplished? You have created a mass of something that will wipe out the entire universe. Children are afraid to leave their homes. They watch their parents fight, and waste away into some sort of sick type of perfection, and the city truly never sleeps, does it?"
Sebastian looked up at Kurt. "I just wanted everything to be perfect. Don't you fucking understand?"
"I wish you'd just die."
Sebastian didn't even look shocked. "I know," he murmured, as he pulled his legs towards him.
Kurt looked down at Sebastian. "Look at all the corrupt you've done," he said, laughing.
"I know," he said in a lower voice now.
He watched Kurt leave, angry and he'd never felt emptier. In all essence, his tears had meant nothing. The world fell apart, and he was the reason for that slow, revolting corrupt. The thing was the ecosystem was beautiful but the humans were horrendous. They just wanted, and wanted, but Kurt was not a victim to this ailment. Sebastian had wiped out all of humanity. He had nothing now and then, in the cold dead end of the night, the town finally took its last straw. They didn't know anything but that there was spread fire, and nothing more. Flames that ignited into nothing, psychopaths like Sebastian whose only real wish was death –
The flames rose quickly. The whole town was on fire, and Sebastian's first instinct was to get Kurt, whom lay unconscious on his bed. He had carried him and they stayed underneath an underground area where no fire would reach them. Sebastian would know because he built it to be proof of anything. The virus he'd created, the pathogen, the mass, and he'd found a way to lock them in a room where nothing can exist but air and canned food. He laid Kurt on the bedside, and he waited. Eventually, the wait became too much to bear. He found the vial he used to create immortality, and then injected Kurt with the serum one last time, before he'd broken the vial all together. None of this…never again. Sebastian looked down to look into Kurt's face, that peaceful face. Nothing mattered, did it? The earth revolved around the sun and the sun was Kurt. That was all that would matter.
Sebastian looked down at Kurt's face, trying to find something, any sign of recognition. He watched those eyes slide open, and then stare at him. For a few moments, he adjusted to the light, and then they stared at each other for the longest of time. Kurt had given him a dark, steady glance. "I'm hungry," Kurt murmured, all of a sudden, as Sebastian had taken off his shirt, only for Kurt to take him. Retractable fangs were digging inside the skin. He fed until Sebastian's blood was gone, but it never mattered because Sebastian came back. Kurt sat furiously, before Sebastian tapped him with a vial, the vial of blood that he swore to never recreate once more. Kurt looked up at him. "You can create a whole world by this. You need a body, but it's possible to retrieve anything that hasn't rotten to its bone."
Kurt didn't even look at him. When he went to the surface, Sebastian heard the vial breaking and crashing. Sebastian walked upstairs, only to find Kurt's eyes filling with tears. The ruins of the war – they were beautiful. The towns recreated. There were people walking around, happy people and children smiling, holding balloons. There was no Force. The vampire populations were…human. Immortality in the most perfect way. Kurt looked back at Sebastian and suddenly, something twisted in his stomach, remembering all the words he'd told Sebastian, of how selfish he was. Kurt curled his lower lip inward.
"I wanted it to be perfect," Sebastian murmured. "For you." He added on, in a lower voice.
Kurt turned around, seeing Burt gesturing to him, and then his eyes widened a few centimetres when he saw that his arm was hooked around his dead Mother, whom was smiling at him. Kurt found himself unable to stop crying, those hot, salty happy tears running down his eyes. Sebastian had broken a disrupted world, to create a beautiful one. Kurt looked at the sky; it was a blue that was almost as equivalent to Kurt's own. "Where's the sun?" Kurt found himself saying, laughing unevenly.
Sebastian looked towards Kurt. "I have no idea," and that was why secrets were secrets, because one person only knew. There was a sun that shone brighter than a star. Sebastian had taken out a canvas and painted it by facts, figures and science.
Kurt's eyes then turned to a softer sadness, looking up at Sebastian. Hollowness sunk into his chest, departing from his body in seconds as he tried to smile weakly. "Sebastian, I…"
After rainfall, there was a rainbow. After corruption, sprouted beauty.
Sebastian turned to look at him. "Please tell me again…" his voice was trembling and there was so much vulnerability into those eyes, absurdness in them, a beautiful type of insanity that was sad. "…tell me that you don't want me to die. Just tell me that you don't want me to die."
Kurt looked at Sebastian as he bit down his lower lip, tears filling his eyes. "I don't want you to die, Sebastian."
Sebastian laughed, but hot tears fell down from his eyes. "Thank you."
"You're mad," Kurt shook his head. "Completely insane—"
"I'm sorry," Sebastian bit down his lower lip. "I have to leave. You wanted a world with no corruption but Kurt…I am corruption. I tried. I swear to any fucking deity that exists that I tried."
Kurt was about to speak, when Sebastian had turned to leave. He ran, and Kurt ran after him. He ran but there was just so many people ready to hold him, hug him, touch him. Kurt had stopped after some time, tripping…and then he lost him, somewhere in the shadows. Kurt had gone back home. He smiled and laughed, with a happy Finn that wasn't a slave, a Mother he'd never had, Carole and Burt still singing together. It was so strange to have everything feel like a lucid dream and then night came. If a sun existed, then it always came with a moon. Sebastian was the moon, reflecting off the light of the sun, and as long as the sky still had the moon, Kurt was able to realise he can track things. Dates with the lunar eclipse. When he wore a scarf, he felt strange. When he held a teddy bear at night, he felt protected. He did not understand any of this.
Underneath the hardwood floor, Kurt had found things. Sometimes, diamonds under the floor of his dream room. He found a book, a book that said a story about a boy, a boy who was lost, a boy who was in love. He read it back to front. It was a story about a boy, whom was imprisoned in a mortal body, with the intention of giving a mortal boy he saw in the sixteenth century everything he could ever wanted because Sebastian would always die for the truth, and the truth was that he was in love with Kurt Elizabeth Hummel. The story never had an end, and Kurt preferred it that way, because the story would never end.
They said that the world would end with a bang, but it ended with a tremble. They never realised that the world can recreate itself, and begin with a promise.
As always, for those who need a quick clarification (I hate these recap things): Sebastian is a vampire that has been imprisoned in a mortal body for having horrendous ideals, kicked out of the Force (a vampiric species that existed in that time and were implied to be hiding or at hiding). His ideals being, as you see in the end, eliminating vampires, and giving all humans immortality. These were days where he was a happier person, a boy that was in love with Kurt in the sixteenth century. Kurt was executed at first, but he tested out his experiment, and he didn't know if it would work. He'd done the same on Blaine. When he'd seen Kurt again, he knew that his vial of blood of immortality worked to some extent, but Kurt ended up with Spanish flu and died. He injected the serum again but as always, Kurt never remembers his memories after the rebirthing process, just like he didn't remember Sebastian after he was rebirthed the first time. After some time, Sebastian grew bored of being immortal, wanting and chasing death, knowing he would not die and hated the fact that he had "needs" as a human, like sleeping and eating. Flash forward years later, the Force had taken over and had eliminated humans. Vampire females that were pregnant gave birth to human babies that grew up only to be used as blood supply for the richer ones. This part was called the Dispute. It's the slavery bit of the whole system. These babies are grown for slaughter.
There's also a mating system, where they mate you with how much physical contact with a vampire you made (Kurt does not recall any of it, but Sebastian does) as they'd had a century's worth of contact, along with that kiss that Sebastian had given him. They grow fond of each other to some extent and Kurt takes care of Sebastian. He gives him the humanity and love that nobody else would. After a while, the Dispute rises up in anger when Blaine was taken captive and killed to made an example of for being thought to be the one to lead the resistance against the Force (as Blaine was almost a parent to these children that had nothing). The Dispute rose and they unleashed a virus (of course, this was in one of Sebastian's past working files that could have been broken into, found, etc) and then the whole world was bloodshed and violence. The pathogenic substance that Sebastian had created made people envious and strove for perfection. That was the corruption, or the beginning of it. They all killed off each other. Sebastian had taken Kurt away (the only reason Kurt wasn't affected? Sebastian didn't initially make it so Kurt could be affected but rather to make for Kurt with it). The bodies decomposed and were regenerated, and living was remade in a short time period. Sebastian practically made the dead rise up and give them eternal immortality, something he'd wanted to do before but didn't want to do anymore. Ashamed, he leaves because he believes all he's done was cause corruption. Kurt, of course, realising the whole story, wants him back. This is never solved, but it is implied that something will happen as Sebastian's goal was to make Kurt's life perfect, to be rid of the sadness he'd seen in those eyes the first time he'd met him (when Kurt had married off Adeline), and Kurt is sad without Sebastian. There is a small implication that Sebastian still watches over Kurt, like he had when he stared at him and observed him far away from the church.
And that's just about it. I think. I hope that makes sense.
xo Peanut Butter/Sam