Title: Running of the Jack

Author: iantojjackh

Rating: R
Characters:Bits of the whole team and Rhiannon

Summary: Jack takes Ianto upon his dare from New Olympic Sport (found in my Drabbles set)

Spoilers: None

Warning: Jack and Ianto shenanigans enough said
Beta: badly_knitted

Notes: fill for prompt 'Naked' at cotton-candy bingo.


Running of the Jack

Casa de Cooper-Williams

Gwen had just taken a sip of beer when she saw an image run across the TV that made her choke on her drink.

"Are you okay?" Rhys emerged from the kitchen. His eyes fell onto the television and he groaned, seeing what had caused his wife to choke. "Bloody hell. Why is Jack streaking the football match?" It was one of those scenes that was like a horrible accident where you want to look away but can't. Clearly, Jack was enjoying himself way too much.

"Ianto's going to tear him a new one for this," Gwen cleared her throat. "What the hell is he thinking?" She had heard Ianto mention once that once there was a tunnel from the hub to the Millennium Stadium. "No, he wouldn't. Would he? Oi, he's becoming just as bad as Jack."

Apparently the media thought Jack's antics were more interesting than the match between Great Britain and Uruguay and one of the female commentators had taken quite the shine to the handsome streaker, alluding to the fact that the majority of people who pull a stunt like that are far less attractive.

The last image Rhys saw before Gwen changed the channel was an extreme close up of what was now being labeled 'Rear of the Year'. "Of course, it would have to be bloody Jack Harkness. The attention always has to be on him," he grumbled good naturedly.

"It's a nice arse, though," Gwen giggled. "But not as nice as yours." She recovered quickly, but still continued to giggle. "This is what happens when the rift is quiet and Ianto enables Jack's bad behaviour."


Same time across town

"Bloody fucking hell," Owen spat out the drink in his mouth, not believing what he was seeing. "Damn't Harkness what are you and tea-boy up to?" The medic half expected to see Ianto trailing not too far behind his insane boyfriend. He was almost relieved when Ianto's arse did not show up on the telly.

"Why is our boss such an exhibitionist?" Owen said, flipping his phone open after the first ring.

"What is he thinking?" Tosh asked. "Does he realise how much trouble he will get in for this?"

"This is Jack. He probably doesn't care. And I'll bet you tea-boy encouraged him. I'm shocked his arse isn't up there as well."

Tosh giggled, "Is that disappointment I hear, Owen?"

"Hell no!" the doctor said a little too quickly. "I wouldn't put it past them to get it on in front of all the cameras." The idea caused Owen to make retching sounds. "I know you and Gwen watch the CCTV of their little games."

"We do not!" Tosh exclaimed, glad Owen could not see her blushing. She always managed to recover the deleted files of some of the naughtier games Jack and Ianto partook in when they thought they had deleted the evidence from the system.


Another place in town

It seemed like half of Cromwell council estate was packed into the tiny pub for the UK versus Uruguay match as one of the men on the UK team was born and raised on the estate. Most of the men were interested in the game, whereas the women came to made sure their husbands did not get too drunk.

Rhiannon was chatting with her friend, Susan when the men started to grumble and boo at the large televisions scattered around the establishment.

"Oh, wow!" Susan's attention was on one of the screens. "Now that's what I'm talking about."

Rhiannon lifted her head to see what the new commotion was about. "Christ almighty." She quickly averted her eyes when she recognised Jack as the naked man running around.

"I know right," Susan licked her lips. "Who knew they still made men like that? I haven't seen a man hung like that in a very long time."

"Sue, that's enough." Rhiannon tried to stop her friend from saying anything more about her de-facto brother-in-law.

"I wonder if he's local. I wouldn't mind trying to get a piece of that. Just because you are married doesn't mean you can't look." Susan was like a cat in heat. "I wonder if he's single and looking."

"He's not. I can tell you that much." Rhiannon's face was bright red. It was no wonder Ianto was rarely in a bad mood, with that to go home to...she had to stop herself from thinking more on the subject. She had always found Jack attractive, but never put much thought into what Jack looked like under his clothes.

"He's not what? Not local or not single? Do you know Mr. Big Dick?"

"He lives in Cardiff alright. A nice posh flat by the bay. Jack, the streaker up there," she pointed to the screen where the game had resumed. "Jack is my brother's boyfriend. They've been together for five years and are very happy. So, he's definitely not single or looking."

"Shit. Your brother? Really?" Susan seemed disappointed that Jack was no longer on the telly.

Rhiannon nodded, her blush dying down. "Yes, really. They were over for supper last Sunday."

"Your brother is one lucky man. Where did he find him? And are there any more of him there?" Susan was not letting up.

"They work together," Rhiannon answered as she pulled out her mobile, wanting to see if Ianto knew what his other half was up to.

Rhi: Do you know what your boyfriend just did?

Ianto: It was my idea. I dared him. Now so many have had a preview of what I get to see every day.

Rhi: You both are crazy. There are people here who are very jealous of you.

Ianto: Got to go, Jack's coming back and we got to run. Talk soon. Love ya.


Ianto tossed his mobile into the console when he saw Jack running to the car, now only wearing his coat.

Jack jumped into the car and Ianto drove off, both wearing the wildest grins. Ianto did not stop until they got to their flat.

"Button the coat, Mrs. Oliver might pass out if she sees that," Ianto pointed out the erection Jack was sporting. It was a rather impressive one and Ianto was sorely tempted to take care of it in the car.

"I know our neighbour has the hots for me."

"She's almost ninety, Jack."

"So?"

"You show her some of our tricks and you'll give her a coronary."

"Such a shame. I bet she was a wild woman in her day."

"Some fetishes should be kept to yourself even after all this time."

"Wrinkles don't turn you on?"

"No, Jack. They don't."

"Then what does turn you on?"

"For you to shut up for once," Ianto smirked as he undid his seat belt and parted Jack's coat.

Jack got the hint and the only sounds heard from him for the next several minutes were the moans of pleasure as Ianto's skilful mouth and hands worked him over.

~Fin