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Simply One Hell of a Writer


Ciel's voice rang out, freezing both me and what would've been my murderer.

Obviously displeased he was unable to finish me off, the butler turned to his master as Ciel spoke once more. "Was I asleep?"

So close to death, to dying at Sebastian's hands. The said butler released his hold on me to turn to the boy, replying smugly, as if he were not about to murder me. "Yes, with your mouth sloppily open." I remained frozen, too shocked to really move at the moment. He was about to kill me. The words kept running through my head and my heart still pounded. Who exactly was this man? Not just a butler…."Then you should have woken me." Ciel snapped, and I could practically hear the frown in his words. "That was in poor taste." I let out a small breath despite myself, and heard Ciel intake in surprise. "Oh, you are…" I turned around just as Sebastian stepped to the side so that I was visible to the very young Earl. "She is here to thank you." The deadly butler smiled concivingly, and Ciel nodded. "I see." Wordlessly, I watched the boy walk around his large desk to stand in front of me, bowing his head. Something inside me tightened, and I tried to push it away. Luckily, my face was able to hide the flurry of emotions drowning me inside. "I am truly sorry-" He frowned, and the pain, or…guilt….increased. "The poor security of this manor brought about your misadventure." Recalling the inhumanly injured and flamboyant red-head, and the man with glasses, I suppressed a shudder. What were they? They didn't act very human. Then again…

Neither did Sebastian. Especially now.

"All blame is in me, the head of the Household of the Earl of Phantomhive." Was all of his politeness, his butler edict an act? I suppose it must have. If so, then he must be one hell of an actor. Even if he did try to kill me. Although, it was not even that which sent my emotions and confusion over the edge. I have never failed, never felt….guilty for my actions. Why did I start now, on such an important mission? My stomach felt as if it were coiling and twisting in my gut, a snake writhing inside. Now I understood why I had tried so desperately to rid myself of feelings. Guilt was such an unpleasant experience. Painful, almost. My almost death experience had opened some fountain of…emotion, inside me. Broke open like a dam.

With a start, I realized the Earl had held out his hand to me, was still speaking. The gnawing guilt grew in my gut unpleasantly. These so called feelings of regret and such were going to flood me, how could average people stand it constantly? I struggled to appear emotionless. "If you would be so kind as to pardon me…" His uncovered eye opened with a genuine-looking smile as he exclaimed. "Your ball is yet to begin!" My ball?

The grand doors opened to reveal a dark room as the Earl still held my hand in his. It was pitch black in there. Did he bring me here to kill me? My heart raced at the thought. Only the butler knew….but for how long? And…why didn't he kill me when he had the change? My thoughts of worry - Ones that I shouldn't of been having at all if I were a proper assassin as I previously thought I was - were interrupted by a familiar girl's voice calling out from the dark. "Happy Birthday!" One by one, candles were lit then the entire room was filled with light, and much to my surprise, people. With a quiet jolt, I realized Sebastian was there, bowing, as ever. One hell of an actor indeed. I scoffed mentally.

"Please welcome tonight's most honored guest!" Ciel exclaimed, lifting my hand in the air. Elizabeth, Paula the maid, along with the Prince Soma, his servant Agni, the merchant Lau and his…well, 'partner' were there too. The boy released my hand and I stepped forward, holding both of my gloved hands in front of me. Incredulously, I realized I was nervous. Nervous, of all things! What has become of me…am I growing that weak? I remembered to force a smile on my lips as some familiar voices spoke out. "Oh, so this is…" "That dress looks good on you, too!" Once I had reached where Elizabeth and the others were, she clasped her hands together and smiled; Something which I assumed she did often. "Onee-sama, everyone is here to celebrate your birthday!" My….what? Then, being the sly butler I'm learning he is, Sebastian leaned forward from behind me to whisper in my ear. I tried not to jump in surprise. "Young Master and Lady Elizabeth were preparing in secret, a surprise party just for you." He leaned back slightly, to my silent relief, but continued talking softly enough just for me to hear. "Natrually I assume the birthday you told Lady Elizabeth was probably a fake." He wasn't wrong. I faintly remembered discussing the upcoming arrival of my 'birthday' during the first time I had 'met' the young blonde. "Nevertheless, today is a special day not only for Lady Elizabeth but for the Phantomhives." The said blonde beamed at me, causing more pain in my abdomen. I hoped this wasn't what guilt felt like, although my hopes were probably wrong.

"Sebastian, we brought it over!" The American accent was clear, and I turned along with the black-clad butler to find the three servants from earlier pushing a huge cake inside. Although I wasn't too proud, my mouth dropped open ever so slightly. I had never seen anything like it before! Was that even a real cake?! "Here it is!" The young blonde gardner cried out happily, and Elizabeth joined in. "What a splendid cake!" Sebastian smiled graciously and added. "We made our every effort for your sake." I almost smiled at the efforts Elizabeth and the Phantomhive servants', but refrained. Although I was flattered beyond belief-even if the information I had told Elizabeth was a lie-I didn't expect any of this to happen. I was also wary of the almost inhuman man beside me. Together, my reign of my emotions was confused me to no end. Ever since my near murder, I had lost my control. And it wasn't the butler's fault. Once again Elizabeth's voice cut through my thoughts, forcing me back to the situation at hand. Was I losing my touch? It certainly felt like it. But that was exactly the problem. Feeling. "Then, Sebastian, sing us a birthday song!" Smiling falsely, as I could see now, he bowed his head humbly. "I? That would be presumptuous of me." I kept from narrowing my eyes at him, then turned my gaze to the young girl. Instead of backing down, she chirped, eyes bright. "A song always follows a birthday cake, doesn't it? Do it for Onee-sama!" No one noticed me wince. This guilt feeling, chewing at my insides was enough to make me wish I could hold back all emotion. It was an unpleasant feeling, almost painful, and nagging. The ruby-eyed butler lip's lifted in a cruel smile, and he simply replied. "If you so ask, Lady Elizabeth, I cannot possibly refuse. Very well." My own lips twisting into a frustrated frown as a thought wormed itself in my head. 'All this time, you had fallen for this butler pretense. Not a doubt in your mind you'd be caught. Are you really as sly as you thought?' I grimaced, then froze as a clear, familiar voice cut through my sourness like a knife. My gaze jerked to Sebastian as he sang, and without my permission, my heart raced slightly faster, despite the fact that I was not in any immediate danger. He sings beautifully. "Happy birthday to…" He paused, met my gaze with another one of those smiles, and then continued singing. I couldn't seemed to look away. I was, somehow, transfixed. A new emotion bubbled in my stomach. "Happy birthday to you." The last note rang out clear, and applause broke out among the strangers-I mean, guests. He just kept on surprising me, didn't he?