Disclaimer: All Twilight-related material belongs to Stephenie Meyer. No copyright infringement is intended.
Battling back my emotions, I walk towards the car. I had hoped that today would go as smoothly as possible… I had hoped that this person would have been someone Edward and I had seen before; I hoped it would be someone who could be locked up with solid evidence. I only got half of what I hoped for, though.
Once we identified Kate, or Katie, as Tanya had so lovingly called her that night in the bar, the agent sat us down and told us the rundown of everything that happened behind the scenes while we were gone.
Apparently, Tanya and Laurent were through; Laurent had dumped Tanya because he found out about her fucking around with James on the side, and because he believed there was no way she was going to get a dime from Edward. When Tanya realized that Edward was right – that there was no way she'd be getting money from Edward, she called in her old buddy Kate for help.
In Tanya's fucked up mind, the root of all of her problems is my relationship with Edward. If I was no longer around, if I was just… gone, her life would be perfect; whether it be her with Laurent or Edward… she didn't care, really, as long as she had money. She decided that the only way she was going to get her money-filled happily ever after was if I ceased to exist.
After high school, Kate dated a man from Italy. He was a criminal who belonged to an old-school, mafia-connected family. The plan was for Kate to "call in a favor" to this man; he was to then "get rid of me" by whatever means necessary.
Tanya thought that she was covering all her bases by leaving Kate out of her explanation to Edward; she thought that Edward would be too dumb to question how she would know of someone like this man, and honestly, she was right. We all believed her. This news is so out of left field that I'm left holding my brain in my hands, feeling entirely inferior to this psychopath.
We missed it. We were too caught up in the drama of the last couple of months; the complete shit storm that constantly seems to surround us, and we believed whatever came out of her mouth.
The worst part of this revelation is that we don't know if there is a viable threat out there. Did Kate ever contact this man? She claims that she didn't, that she never intended to; she claimed that she planned to tell Edward all this to get back at Tanya, but how much can we trust her? If Kate is to be believed, she claims that in high school, she had a crush on Edward. She claims the whole scam of Edward and her hooking up was concocted by Tanya; getting Tanya arrested was to be her revenge.
Honestly, it's all completely immature and ridiculous, and it pisses me off beyond belief that my life was risked because of two crazy bitches.
I'm startled by Edward sliding into the car and it thankfully stops my racing thoughts. He grabs my hand after starting the car and squeezes it gently. After a few minutes of silently driving, he speaks. "You okay?"
I nod. "I'm getting there."
"I asked my mom to pick Masen up from school and keep him for the night."
"Edward… he was there last night. We can't keep pawning him off on your family. It's not right. I don't want him to feel neglected."
Edward laughs a little. "First of all, it's our family," he corrects, kissing the back of my hand. "And we need to take care of ourselves, too. He isn't feeling neglected at all, how could he with our crazy family? They've missed us, especially him, and they want to help us out. Trust me, he's being spoiled rotten and not thinking of us at all."
I grin, because I know he's right; between Esme and Carlisle and all his actual and pseudo aunts and uncles, and my dad, who he lovingly refers to as "Pops," he hasn't had a chance to be alone. "I guess you're right. But… I just feel bad anyway."
"You need to stop feeling bad, especially when there's no reason to."
"I'm trying." He raises a disbelieving eyebrow at me. "I am. I promise." Even though I'm telling the truth, my body betrays me. I feel the tightness form in my chest and the familiar burn in my eyelids. I try to ignore it and instead of freaking out, I copy Edward's earlier actions, lifting our joined hands to kiss the back of his. He smiles at me and we enjoy the rest of the ride home in comfortable silence.
When we arrive home, I beeline it for the bathroom. I shut the door behind me and lock it before plopping down on the closed toilet seat. Sighing, I run my hands through my hair, practicing the deep breathing exercises that Emmett taught me. If it works for a veteran, it should work for me. It does work. A little.
After my mini freak-out, I stand up and look in the mirror. I don't even recognize the woman looking back at me. Her heart shaped face is more pale than usual, there are dark circles beneath her dim brown eyes, and a frown on her face.
I touch my cheeks and then puff them out, noticing that they're a bit more hollow than usual. Edward's been voicing his concern over my weight loss and I know he's worried about me. Honestly, I'm a little worried about me, too. Especially if…
I bite my lip and shake my head. I have no time for "if" right now. I take a deep breath and rummage through the bottom drawer of the vanity until my hand lands on the paper bag I shoved in there yesterday.
I pull it out and reach inside, trying to calm my rapidly beating heart. My fingers shake as I open the box, which only serves to make me more nervous. I read the box and a maniacal giggle escapes my lips as I roll my eyes. "It should just say, 'Pee on the damn stick and wait,'" I grumble as I do, in fact, pee on the damn stick.
And then I wait.
I wait well beyond the time that the box says to; so long, in fact, that Edward knocks on the door, scaring the shit out of me. "Babe? You okay in there?"
A rush of excitement fills me… surprising me, because I expected to feel nothing but dread. "I-I'm fine."
"Yes," I answer with more confidence. I open the door to find Edward standing there, leaning against the wall, looking like he has the weight of the world on his shoulders.
He looks up and gives me his crooked grin, but its tinged with sadness. "Feeling better?"
I nod, grabbing his hand to lead him to the bed.
He sits down with a sigh and I stand between his parted legs. "All this will get better eventually, Bella, I promise. One day… we'll be done with all this bullshit. It'll just be us… our little family. No more drama."
I swallow, running my hands through his wild hair. "What if… our family isn't so little?"
He smirks up at me. "You're right…" he laughs. "Our family definitely isn't little. I love them all, I do, but there's just so many of them. But I meant, like, just us, you know? You, me, and Masen. We definitely need quality family time."
"I know what you meant… I was talking about us. What if our little family wasn't so little? What if it got… bigger?"
He studies my face closely. "What do you mean? Another child?" I nod. "Is that something you want?"
Is it? His question makes me think. Do I want a baby of my own? Of course, I love Masen as if he was my own, but I can't help the images that flash through my head. A little baby boy or girl… a perfect mix of me and Edward.
It plays out like a movie… Edward taking me to doctor's appointments, giving me back rubs, kissing my growing belly. Masen telling stories to my belly, being so helpful and sweet. I see all of us together… and yes, I want it. I want it more than anything.
"Yes," I answer. "I want that more than anything, actually. Is that… is it something you want?"
He smiles, so big and bright. "Of course, Bella." He pulls me onto his lap. And I swear, my answering smile is so, so bright. "I think once all this has settled down, in a few months, we should definitely start trying."
He kisses my neck, smiling against my skin. My own smile falters, his words registering in my brain. Nausea hits me, hard and fast, and I feel as though I'm going to quickly expel the contents of my stomach. He wants to wait a few months, but more likely than not, I'm more than a couple months along already.
Edward must feel my stiff posture, because he pulls back, looking at me with a crease between his eyebrows. "What's wrong?" he asks softly, running his thumb along my cheek.
"We don't have to try in a couple of months." His frown deepens and I take a deep breath, gathering all of my courage. "I… I'm pregnant. I just took a test."
"What?" he blinks, his hand dropping from my face.
"What? But… how?" I raise an eyebrow and he rolls his eyes. "I mean, I know how, but I just meant…" he trails off, looking as if he might be the one who throws up.
"Are you upset?" I ask, biting my lip.
"No!" he says, shaking his head. "Of course, I'm not." He wraps his arms around me tightly and kisses the top of my head. "How long have you known?"
"I suspected… but I just found out earlier when I took the test and-"
"You're pregnant!" he yells suddenly.
"Yeah…" I say slowly. "Are you okay?"
His eyes are wide and his mouth is wide open and then suddenly, holding me tightly in his arms, he's standing, spinning me around and around. "You're pregnant. We're going to have a baby!"
His enthusiasm and his happiness flow through me, making me even dizzier as he continues to spin us around. I hang onto him tightly, smiling so wide, I feel like my face may split in two.
A while later, after the excitement of the pregnancy news… and lots of celebratory sex, Edward and I are splayed across our bed, sticky with sweat.
"I can't believe we're going to have a fuckin' baby…" Edward trails off.
"Hey! Watch your language." I slap his arm playfully.
He smiles at me, his eyes crinkling a bit at the corners as he does. "Masen isn't around and this little one," he kisses my stomach lovingly, "can't understand my curse words for years. We're all right."
I run my hands through his silky soft, slightly damp hair and sigh. "Are you happy? I mean… are you really happy about this?"
His green eyes search my face. "Are you?"
"Don't answer a question with a question," I tease, my heart hammering in my chest as I wait for his serious answer.
"Bella… with all of the shit we've had going on lately… it's been really hard to actually be happy, you know?" I bite my lip and nod. "Every time you smile at me, every time Masen laughs at something… it does make me happy, but there's always those nagging thoughts in the back of my brain; there's always the fear. The fear of the unknown threats against us, the fear of someone taking you all from me. But tonight? I didn't think about any of that bullshit, Bella. All I could think about all night was how much I love you, how much I love Masen, and how much I'm going to love this little nugget in here," he kisses my stomach again.
"Me too," I reply with a grin. "I didn't think about anyone else but us. And that's what I'm going to do from now on."
These last few months have been hectic and crazy, so much so that it almost drove me crazy. Looking at Edward's smiling face, his eyes bright green, like sea glass, I can't help but feel that it's all been worth it.
So, so worth it.
We have more obstacles ahead of us, but I feel so much hope and happiness right now, that I know we can get through it together.
Edward places his hand on my stomach gently, looking at me with such love and adoration, like warm sunshine on a cool fall morning. "I love you," he says, kissing me gently.
I kiss him back and smile against his lips and respond, "I love you. So much."
A/N: Woohoo, another update! 2 in 2 days… it's a miracle. Lol. We're in this together, folks. xo