Chapter 1: I think I'm ready

She was walking through the hallway of the set, everything was dark, she still was scared, but she had decided it, this whole thing was bullshit, she knew it was now or never, this game had to end.

There she was, looking for something in her purse, probably her car keys, she never could find them and wasted more than 10 minutes to then realize they were on her pocket, every single time.

"Hey", ashley said while getting near her; shay looked away from her purse, "are you done with your scenes?", ash nodded, "just done, you?", shay finally found her keys on her pocket, "same, heading home", ashley just stared at her a little unsure of what to do next so she just sighed "oh...", shay grabbed her script and her purse, "so, see you tomorrow?", she wasn't going to tell her, she was a coward "I guess", so, fuckin', awkward, not what she expected at all.

Shay gave her a kind smile and started walking away, ashley knew she had to stop her "shay!" she joined her near the parking lot; the wind was blowing, the night was quiet, it was one of those days. As soon as she reached her, shay turned around smiling at her, ugh that smile, this is so stupid "what's up?" she took a deep breath and choose carefully her words "I'm ready to commit" there, she said it, that was it, no turning back, she wanted to pee, she tried to read shay's face but there was nothing there, but she talked "what?" she repeated her words slowly this time, trying to put all the meaning she could, "that I, ashley, I'm ready to commit", shay didn't say anything, they just stand there, being consumed by the silence of the night, then ash tried again "I think I'm ready", shay closed her eyes and opened them again in frustration "ready for what?", ashley was starting to shake, she wanted to bury her face in the bushes "ready for it...", shay's face was cold, confused, fuck, she screwed it up.

Then she finally spoke, but she would've preferred to have stayed in the silence "commit? Ash, you are with Ryan, what the hell are you talking about?" Ouch, it would've been better if she just grabbed her heart and crush it, "listen to me, I'm done with this, I admit I was scared but you know me way too well to understand, I've never felt you know, um-", shay raised her hands to stop her from talking "wait, wait, I'm going to stop you right there buddy; is this one of your pranks?" Ash was annoyed, she was trying to explain, to open up, but there she was thinking it was some kind of sick joke "no, what?", shay gave her a knowing look "you know, what you always do, make people feel uncomfortable until you make them wanna punch you and then you stop", that was it, "no, it wasn't like that; you know what? Just forget it, I'm gonna go", with that said, she turned back and started walking towards her car; was this a joke? Did she really think that? All she wanted right now was to go home, but she knew shay wasn't going to let it go now she was the one who screwed it up. "ash ... c'mon, stop, wait" shay started chasing her after realizing she was wrong. Ashley hated the way she always listened to her even though she was pissed "tell me" now shay was the one being careful with her words "what happened back there?", but she knew better, "nothing", shay tried harder "you were saying you were ready...", but she cut her off "I'm not", now shay was the one getting hurt, "then why-", ashley rolled her eyes "oh, just forget it, wanna come over?", she asked changing completely the subject to avoid the pain in her chest. Shay seemed confused but let it go "yeah, why not, it's a 5minute drive, so", ash gave her a smile "let's order some pizza and watch pitch perfect" shay smiled back and completed "then bridesmaids", she always knew what to say "omg, my thoughts exactly", "okay then, see you there", ash got a little annoyed "hu? Weren't you already leaving?" but let shay explain, "Yeah babe, but I promised keegan I would give him a ride, I'll be at your place in 30min tops", ash nodded and just said "okay".

Shay gave her a quick hug and went to the other side of the parking lot to meet with keegs. That poor guy really needs the lift, after all, he only owns a bike, ash laughed at the thought, but then she raised her eyebrows and stared at them "perhaps some quickie too", by the way he was staring at shay's ass…, he smiled at her while saying something in her ear, well that's rude! Shay wasn't looking annoyed though…

When she entered her apartment, she laid lazily in her couch, the day had been overwalming, 10 scenes in 14 hours, it must be some new record.

She waited for shay to come, but she was starving so, she went to the kitchen opened the fridge and grabbed a piece of cake her mother baked for her. Tasting the first bite she screamed "this is the best thing ever!", and then a voice came mockingly through the door "really? I thought my peppered pizza was" ash was taken by surprise, shay had arrived, she always did that, entered whenever she wanted, most of the times scaring her.

She turned to see her, "na, yours goes to the never again pile!" shay just rolled her eyes "whatever, what ya doing?" she sat next to her in the couch, "watching gossip girl. The finale sucked", shay agreed "i knoww, so out of line", ash kept starring at the tv "yeah, and blair is being such an idiot", shay rested her head on the couch, "yes but dan and serena are back together, finally", this kind of conversations always made them discuss, but ashley never gave up, "the fuck are you saying?, dude, they just slept together because blair left dan without any explanation, that's low" shay smiled, ashley was so stubborn, "caalm down, I'm just saying, everything's back to normal", ash snapped back "back to boring you'd say", shay knew how ashley behaved about her favorite shows so she just changed the subject, "so, plans for vacations?" "I don't know, new york perhaps", ash grabbed the remote control and started changing channels, "with who?" she kept zapping without even bother to see what was on "Ryan I guess, or... Vanessa" shay looked at her playfully annoyed "oh okay", she said while crossing her arms and turned to face the television, ashley laughed because she knew how it bothered shay when she talked about vanessa, they became best friends when ash was filming spring breakers, and that made shay a little jealous "ohh, I'm just kidding idiot, of course you'd be first than Vanessa" she said with a british accent, shay grinned, and hugged her "I knew you would never leave your mate behind (she said playing with her british accent)!", ash hugged her harder and placed her face on her hair, she smelled like roses, she loves roses, "neverr, now get off me", she said while pulling shay down, she was on top of her because of the hugging.

Shay faked being offended, and opened her mouth with indignation.
Ashley only laughed harder, she always did that, shay sometimes teased her too, but that's how they were, and that's what kept them so close, those stupid little things.
In no time, they forgot about any awkwardness they had earlier, and spent the whole night talking and laughing. That's how they were, since the beginning, until the end, always good for each other.