Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.

A/N: A little later than I intended to release it, but there you go.

Okay, first off somebody pointed out a mistake in the last chapter. I ninjutsu (the very first one) that I had intended Naruto to learn was the Shuriken Kage Bunshin no jutsu (Shuriken Shadow Clone technique). That is a technique that creates shadow clones of a single shuriken. The technique I mentioned last chapter was the Kage Shuriken no jutsu (Shadow Shuriken technique), which is the move Naruto and Sasuke used again Zabuza in the Wave arc to hide a fuuma shuriken in the shadow of another. I haven't gotten around to fixing the mistake yet, though I do intend to do so. Again the technique Naruto learned is the Shuriken Kage Bunshin no jutsu.

They also pointed out that Rock Lee doesn't actually have some sort of disease that prevents him from molding chakra (I actually assumed he could only do things like three climbing and water walking, but could NOT do things like elemental ninjutsu or genjutsu). Is that right? Is the whole, Lee has a birth defect fanon? If that's true…it's kinda funny.

Thanks and let's get on with the show.


Chapter 4: Overwhelming Force

~1 day before the final~

"…so by the end of Hiru-chan's little experiment, he and his two teammates were bald, naked and covered in honey", Mito and Naruto were both laughing by the end of the story.

Naruto snickered, "All that, because the old man wanted to learn how to use a sword?"

"Hiru-chan has refused to pick up a katana since that day."

The blond snorted, 'Greatest. Story. Ever.' He would definitely remember that one.

Dusk approached on the last day before the Finals of the Chunin Exams. Though Naruto had done some training earlier, on Mito's insistence he decided to take it easy. Mito called him inside hours before sunset, stating that he would get more out of resting for the remainder of the day.

He then washed up and joined Mito for dinner. They had ordered out, quite a large meal at that.

Naruto took another bite of the ramen. Though it didn't hold a candle to Ichiraku's, he had yet to find a place that did, he still found it quite good, "Never knew the old man had a wild side when he was a kid."

"Oh, you would be quite surprised how often respectable figures had a 'wild side' in their youth." She raised her cup of tea to hide her growing smile. "You wish to become the Hokage in the future, do you not." Though he nodded, Mito didn't wait for a response, "I am sure that some child in the future would be surprised to learn that you painted grafitti over the Hokage's monument when you were just twelve years old." She then sipped her tea.

Naruto blushed at the comment, and rubbed the back of his head. "Yea…I guess…"

Mito placed her cup down, "You know, you actually remind me of someone I knew when I was just a little girl."

"Do I?"

Mito got a distant look on her features, "He was a dear friend of mine growing up. He was…very excitable."

Naruto looked up, "Now that I think about it, you've never really talked about your family."

Mito gave Naruto a blank look, "My childhood was not very exciting. My father was the leader of the Uzumaki clan. My mother died when I was young, so I did not know her too well. I had an older brother, who ended up succeeding my father as the clan leader. My childhood was spent learning the shinobi arts."

Naruto grinned, "You wanted to be a ninja?"

Mito shook her head, "Not at all. What I truly wanted was to become skilled enough to defend both my home and myself, if the need arose. I had no desire to journey out of my village, to sell my skills." Mito momentarily looked away from him, "After my training was complete, my father placed me in the Village's Defense Corps. Afterwards, I spent my time studying Fuinjutsu."

"Did Uzushio have it's own Academy?"

Again, Mito shook her head, "No. Each prospective shinobi was trained by a relative. However, my father did design and fund certain exercises that shinobi hopefuls could take part in." She stared at him for a moment, "It was at one of those exercises that I met that friend I mentioned before. They divided all of the children up into two teams. One side protected a 'VIP', while the other side tried to defeat or capture her."

Naruto caught her choice of words. "You?"

"Indeed." Mito nodded. "I was the one chosen to play the VIP. Kurohoshi, that was my friend's name, was on the other side. My group was forced to stay in the open, while Kurohoshi's team were advised to stick to the shadows" Mito smiled and tried to suppress her laughter. "Instead, Kurohosi climbed to the highest building in the area, yelled out his name and declared that he would defeat me." That time, Mito did giggle as the memory played in her head. Her guards, the other students, were on him in moments…however she had been so awestruck by his bravado that she elected to fight him herself. The match had been painfully, for Kurohoshi, short.

Naruto thought back to Kakashi's Bell Test. "Yea…that sounds like something I would do."

Mito's silent giggle turned into loud laughter, Naruto soon joined in as well.

It took her a while, but Mito finally managed to regain control of her laughter, "I believe we are supposed to be talking strategy." Her comment sobered him up. "Your first opponent is the Hyuuga. That clan trains to excel at close quarters combat. Your best chance would be to keep him at a distance."

Naruto shrugged as he downed another rice ball. "I'm not worried, I know how to deal with him."

Mito frowned. Success was the line between pride and arrogance; she wasn't quite sure which side Naruto would fall under. "May I ask?"

Naruto grinned, "It's a secret."

"Your mystery weapon then?"

The boy's grin widened.

Mito sighed, "Though not your immediate concern, I do believe that this Sabaku no Gaara is going to be your most dangerous opponent."

Naruto sighed at the thought of Gaara, "Yea…he has this sand defense thing that blocks every attack that tries to hit him. Fuzzy brows could barely touch him." He then flashed her a foxy grin, "I'm thinking of hitting him with two hundred and eight exploding kunai…kinda wanna see if he can block that."

Mito shuddered at the number. She wasn't entirely comfortable with Naruto, or really ANYONE, carrying around that kind of arsenal. "There are methods to defeat a Jinchuuriki using Fuinjutsu, however the techniques are far too advance for you to learn yet."

The blond shrugged, "No big deal. I'm just psyche that I got the chance to show everyone that the Uzumaki clan is still badass!"

The redhead's eyes widened at the comment. She smiled after a moment though. Naruto, I could not help but notice that your outfit is in tatters…"

~x~

Naruto walked back into the room in a completely different outfit. His orange jacket was replaced with a red, sleeveless, high-collared jacket. His orange pants and blue shinobi sandals were replaced with black-colored ones. He also wore a pair of black, fingerless gloves. A spiral design was on the back of his jacket and gloves, black on the jacket and red on the gloves. His hitai-ate was still wrapped around his forehead. (1)

Mito examined the boy closely. "When we first moved in here, I happened to find one of our clan's old uniforms in storage. I gave it to a tailor and asked him to alter it to your size."

Naruto was still looking himself over. "So this is one of our clan's uniforms?"

Mito pursed her lips, "Not exactly. The tailor took an artistic liberty and turned it into what you are wearing now. Just as well I suppose, I do not believe Uzushio's heavy armor would have been much use to you. Certainly not against your first opponent and unlikely against the others." She caught Naruto's eyes. "Tell me, how do you like it?"

"Looks cool and it's super light too. But…" Naruto blushed. "It's not orange."

Mito bit back a snort. In a gentle tone, "Forgive me, but I did not take your favorite color in mind when I commissioned that outfit." She got a distant look in her eyes, "Red and black are…were common colors of our village's shinobi force." She gestured towards herself. Mito was wearing a black top with a plaid red and black skirt; the same outfit Naruto had seen her wear when he first met her. "My own attire reflects that tradition, call it a sense of nationalism, if you will."

Naruto grew nervous. "Didn't the First Hokage wear a red and black outfit?"

Mito frowned, "Though his clan used similar armor, his was actually a gift from our clan, for our engagement. I specifically asked for those specifics color. His brother's armor was also a gift from us, though I asked for Tobirama's to be blue."

"Oh, is blue your favorite color something?"

"No, quite the opposite actually."

Naruto resisted the urge to laugh. Mito hadn't hidden her dislike of Tobirama…not by a long shot.

The redhead gave him a slight nod. "Tomorrow, you will be judged on many factors, not just on your combat skills. Going into a battle with ripped clothing will not look well on you. Simply wearing that clothing will give you a better chance at being promoted, so please bare with it."

Naruto's eyes widened and his face paled. "No…I mean, I didn't mean to sound ungrateful, because I really do like it. I was just mentioning it…I didn't realize that red and black were clan colors."

"Common colors", Mito corrected. "Unless you were part of our leader's personal guard, our clan did not actually have a dress code. I thought you could make use of it. I am, in no way, prohibiting you from wearing orange if you wish to do so."

The blond shrugged, "Honestly I kinda like it though. Makes me feel like an actual member of the Uzumaki clan…" Mito smiled at the comment. "That probably sounds stupid, since you're the only person of our clan that I've ever met…"

"It does not sound stupid at all."

Naruto let out a deep breath. He then clenched his fists and smiled at the girl, "Yea, I'm so going to kick ass tomorrow. I'll make our clan proud."

Mito giggled, "I am sure that you will. Perhaps I should offer you a reward for…defeating every opponent you are put up against?" Naruto blushed. "Perhaps I can offer you another ninjutsu or perhaps lessons elemental nature manipulation or maybe something more material-"

"How about a date?" Naruto quickly interrupted. Mito's eyes widened. "If I win the tournament, then how about we go out on a date?"

Mito's cheeks reddened. That had been a surprise. Not an unwelcome surprise, but a surprise nonetheless. She thought it over for a few moments. That would be crossing a line…one that wouldn't exist if Naruto weren't still in need of training. There was also the obvious age difference: Naruto was thirteen while she was, chronologically, well over a hundred. Mito pursed her lips…that'd actually be a problem for anyone she could choose to be with. And, since she was biologically close to Naruto's age, it was likely that he would be the only other person able to match her lifespan. Then again, he was Kushina's son.

Naruto for his part was pale. He wondered if he crossed some line that he probably should NOT have. He knew she had been married before, to the freaking Shodaime Hokage of all people. 'But that was like another life ago.' He wondered if she was even interested in being with anyone.

"Very well" Mito began, snapping Naruto out of his thoughts. "If you defeat all of your opponents, then I will allow you to court me."

Naruto grinned back at her. 'I am SO going to kick everybody's ass!'

Since they were expecting an early morning, neither of them stayed up too much longer.

~Day of the Finals~

The next day, Naruto woke up early, ate a small breakfast and left on his own to go to the arena. He was ushered into a room that contained most of the other contestants. Gaara was standing in the corner. Gaara's siblings/teammates, Temari and Kankuro, were standing a few feet a way from their younger brother. Neji sat in the opposite corner, apparently trying to meditate. Shino leaned against a wall, alternating between staring at Neji, the guy who brutalized his teammate, to staring at Kankuro, his opponent. Sasuke, Shikamaru and Dosu were missing.

Naruto opted to sit not too far from Shino, which placed him closer to Neji than Gaara. When the finals started, they would apparently all walk out into the center of the arena to hear the rules…Naruto just thought they wanted to put them all on display for everyone to see.

Either way, Naruto had more important thoughts to worry about…like where he could take a girl out on a date. Ichraku's just seemed too…cheap…and common. He hadn't gone to too many restaurants in his youth, since Ichiraku's was both cheap and delicious, he didn't feel the need to. He didn't know how many of them would take issue with him being within their establishment. 'Maybe I could make a picnic…do girls like picnics?' He knew how to cook. Teuchi, Ayame, Iruka and even Hiruzen, had taught him how to over the years. The main problem was, where could they go? The nicest place he knew of was the Senju grounds…but that just seemed a bit lazy…

While deep in thought, Naruto didn't notice Shikamaru enter the waiting room. The shinobi of the Nara clan took one look around the room and immediately went to go sit between Naruto and Shino. The boy took one glance at Naruto before resting his head against the wall and shutting his eyes. "Thinking about your fight?"

Naruto shook his head, not at all surprised when Shikamaru broke him out of his thoughts. "Nah, I'm gonna to win no problem." He said loud enough for Neji to hear him. The Hyuuga gave the blond a hard stare, before continuing his meditation. Naruto glanced at the boy next to him. In a much quieter voice, "Hey, do you know a good place to take a girl to?"

Shikamaru's cocked an eyebrow and shrugged at the question. "Why would I know that?"

Naruto shrugged, "Where do you take Ino?"

Shikamaru's cheeks heated up, "What the hell makes you think I would date such a troublesome girl!"

"Oh…I just figured…"

"Well you figured wrong!" Shikamaru barked.

Naruto held up his arms, defensively, "Alright, alright geez." After giving the boy one last glare, Shikamaru turned away and went back to trying to nap. "Think you could ask that Suna girl for me?"

Again, Shikamaru's head snapped towards Naruto. "Why would I do that?"

The blond shrugged, "I figured another girl would know, and you have a match with her so…"

Shikamaru narrowed his eyes, "Yes Naruto, sometime between her trying to bludgeon me with that giant fan and shooting blasts of wind at me…I'll try and ask her where she likes to go on dates. And maybe while she's busy trying to stab me I'll gently stroke her hair while I'm at it. Oh, and if she decides to launch me in the air, like that Tenten girl, and catch me on her fan, I'll go ahead and tell her how beautiful she is. That all sound good to you, Naruto?"

Naruto blinked a few times and stared at the boy in front of him for several moments. "Ummm…go ahead if you want…but I really just need you to ask her about the date thing."

Shikamaru sighed. 'Why does Naruto have to be SO troublesome?'

~x~

Gambling was a well-integrated part of the Chunin Exams. For the last five decades a merchant family that spanned the Elemental Nations, the Masaki Clan, headed all gambling done during the exams.

Though each country's Chunin Exams varied, they ALWAYS ended in a one on one tournament-styled free for all. That is where the Masaki clan came in. They researched each of the contestants thoroughly. The contestant's village usually provided them with any, non-classified, information on the contestants in question. They then took each of the well-researched dossiers and ranked each of the contestants accordingly. For example…

Uzumaki Naruto. Konoha genin. Age, 13. Sensei: Hatake Kakashi. Academy dobe of his class. Genjutus ability: non-existent. Taijutsu style: None/street-fighter? Chakra capacity: large. Elemental affinity: unknown, numerous sources presume fire. Notable skills: Kage Bunshin no jutsu. Notable traits: impulsive, loyal, creative, emotional. Special notes: Wears a bright orange outfit. Chunin exam notes: Won his preliminary match with a lucky…fart.

Compared to…

Hyuuga Neji. Konoha Genin. Age, 14. Sensei: Maito Gai. Academy rookie of the year of his class. Genjutsu ability: unknown, presumed immunity. Taijutsu style: Jyuuken. Chakra capacity: large. Elemental affinity: reportedly, Earth. Bloodlimit: Byakkugan. Notable skills: Jyuuken. Notable traits: arrogant, ruthless, intelligent. Special notes: hailed as a prodigy in his own clan. Chunin exam notes: won his preliminary match with overwhelming force.

Odds? 50-to-1 in Hyuuga Neji's favor.

The Masaki clan also screens who was allowed to gamble during the exams.

For example, Maito Gai was allowed to freely place bets, as long as he ONLY placed them on his own student, Hyuuga Neji. Likewise, Hatake Kakashi was allowed to place bets, as long as he placed them on either of his two students. However, if both of Hatake's students were to meet in a battle, then Hatake was completely prohibited from betting. This was to prevent him from 'asking' one of his students to throw a fight, in order to win an easy bet. That was also the reason that senseis were ONLY allowed to place bets on their own students.

One Masaki Noburo sat at his desk after taking yet another bet for the upcoming exam. "Next please." Noburo looked up to the next person to approach the desk he'd been provided. The man in front of him provided him with his ID.

"I'd like to place a bet on Uzumaki Naruto."

Noburo looked at the man's ID very carefully. Umino Iruka. The man was, reportedly, an instructor of four of the genin within the exam: Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, Aburame Shino, and Nara Shikamaru. A very popular instructor, according to word of mouth. Normally something like that should have prohibited the man from placing any bets…however reports indicate that he lost touch with most of his students. Reportedly, the only student that he maintained contact with, and by extension still had any pull with, was the very student he wanted to bet on.

Noburo nodded. "How much are you wanting to place on him?"

"Six thousand ryo on Naruto, all the way."

Noburo nodded. Though it wasn't all that much money, and it was placed on the underdog of such a one-sided fight, it could prove fruitful if the boy managed a lucky win. Besides, there weren't nearly enough people betting on Uzumaki. "Your bet is accepted." Noburo jotted a few things down on a notebook and handed Iruka a slip of paper, "And there is your receipt. Good luck to you sir."

Iruka nodded and left. The man went through the seating and quickly caught sight of Naruto's new sensei. He also noted the empty seat right next to her. As he started walking down the aisle to reach her, she took notice of him and flashed him a small smile. "Hey, mind if I sit with you?"

"Of course not", she gestured towards the chair next to her, "Please have a seat."

Iruka sat down and looked down towards the arena.

As he did so, she happened to note the receipt in his hand. The girl's features sobered up and she turned away from him, "Are you a regular gambler, Umino-san?" she asked in a neutral voice.

Not noting the edge in the girl's voice, Iruka just shrugged. "Not really a hobby or anything like that. But hey, I know Naruto's going to win for sure, so it isn't really gambling, right?"

Mito turned to look at the man, shock evident on her features. After a while a smile spread on her face and she shook her head. "I suppose not."

~x~

Down in the arena, the battle between Naruto and Neji started with the typical banter that audience had come to expect from Chunin Exams Finals. It ended with Neji telling the story of his father's death.

By the end of it, Naruto and Neji continued facing off, both glaring daggers at the other. "I'll say it once more, give up. You are fated to lose this battle."

Naruto rolled his eyes, "That move was lame when you tried it on your cousin and it's lame now. Oh and for the record-" Naruto narrowed his eyes at Neji, "-when I shove your head up your ass, it's because you suck and I'm awesome, not because I was fated to shove your head up your ass."

Neji scowled at the blond. "Since you won't listen to reason…Byakugan!" The Hyuuga activated his blood limit.

At the same time, Naruto pulled out a Fuma Shuriken from one of his pouches. He snapped it open, holding it by the ring, and held it out in front of him. The fuma shuriken had some strange black symbols painted on it. The blond smirked, "My prized creation, the Uzumaki Shuriken."

Neji nearly rolled his eyes. "A Fuma shuriken isn't something new, you idiot."

"You haven't seen a Fuma shuriken like this one", the blond laughed.

That time, Neji did roll his eyes. "Either way, only an arrogant fool would name weapon after himself."

"Well I wanted to name it the Go Fuck Yourself Shuriken, but for the life of me I couldn't figure out how to curse in Japanese." Naruto looked down, "It really shouldn't be so hard to learn how to curse in Japanese." (2)

Again, Neji rolled his eyes and prepared his strategy. He knew from the Uzumaki's last battle that Naruto wasn't very fast and that he wasn't too strong. Neji's strategy was simple: avoid the shuriken and get into close range to knock out the younger boy with a gentle fist strike.

Naruto tossed the fuma shuriken, parallel to the ground. A moment later, he placed his hand in the ram seal, "Kai!" Before everyone's eyes four pure black, regular-sized shuriken appeared from the Uzumaki Shuriken and launched themselves in opposite directions. A quarter of a second later, a second set erupted from the Uzumaki Shuriken. And then a third set, and a fourth set, and a fifth set.

Neji's eyes widened as the one large shuriken started spewing out many small ones. He blocked one shuriken, and then a second, and finally just dropped down, allowing the blades to fly over his head.

~x~

Up in the stands, Mito stared wide-eyed at Naruto's creation. Everything he did was just so…simple. He took a Fuma Shuriken and sealed kami knows how many shadow shurikens into each of the four blades, she could tell they were nothing but shadow clone shurikens because they disappeared the moment they impacted with a hard surface. He then set the seals to release, and launch, each of the shurikens in rapid succession. And no doubt, if the fuma shuriken passed over Neji, Naruto would reveal…

~x~

Back in the arena, Neji watched as Naruto's special fuuma shuriken passed over his head. With his blood limit, Neji watched as the Uzumaki Shuriken continued flying, waiting until the damn thing crashed into the wall and stopped spinning. On the other side, he watched Naruto do a quick chain of hand seals and prepared to dodge a second attack.

"Soshujin."

Before Neji's eyes, Naruto's custom fuma shuriken turned away from the wall, and came flying back towards Neji. However, the angle of the blade twisted a few degrees so that it was no longer parallel to the ground. Again, Neji was forced to dodge the shadowy shurikens.

Naruto grinned as he 'remotely' twisted and turned his Uzumaki Shuriken, trying to continuously angle the weapon so that it continued firing shurikens in Neji's direction.

Neji continuously blocked and rolled away from each of the shurikens. Blocking was semi painful, however avoiding could potentially be dangerous. If he leapt to far, he ran the risk of landing in the path of another one of the shuriken. He considered using the Kaiten, but stopped himself. He didn't want to use his trump card unless he absolutely needed to.

Soon enough, Naruto's shuriken lost momentum and eventually landed helplessly on the ground, ten feet away from the Hyuuga, no longer firing shadow cloned shuriken. Neji was about to turn on the Uzumaki, for putting him in such a disgraceful position, when the Uzumaki Shuriken exploded. Though far away enough to avoid serious injury, the force of the blast knocked Neji off of his feet and accidentally forced him to release control of his Byakugan. Quickly composing himself, Neji jumped to his feet and reactivated his blood limit.

And then his heart skipped a beat.

Naruto stood in the same position he was before, a shit eating grin on his face. Except this time he was standing in line with nine, presumably, shadow clones. Each of them was holding an Uzumaki Shuriken.

Up in the stands, though concerned for her teammate, Tenten had a little tiny orgasm.

The proctor, one Shiranui Genma, took the opportunity to leave the arena.

Neji dashed towards the blond(s). His plan was simply to get in short range, like he should have done earlier, of the Uzumaki so that it would be suicide for him to use those thrice-damned fuma shurikens. He would then use the Kaiten to hit the real boy and dispel the clones. And if the boy were stupid enough to use the blades at short range, then he would simply rely on the Kaiten to protect himself.

Instead of standing there or throwing one of the blades, one of the Narutos stabbed their Uzumaki Shuriken into the ground and lunged forward to intercept the Hyuuga.

Neji glared at the clone, he presumed it was a clone at least. He'd Jyuken the clone and continued with his original plan. And if it so happened to the real Naruto, he'd finish the boy off in one strike.

When 'Naruto' and Neji were both in striking distance, they both shot out with an open palmed thrust. Both attacks, concurrently, connected. Unfortunately for the Hyuuga, he made the mistake of judging Naruto by the speed he showed in the Preliminaries.

Neji's Jyuken strike hit 'Naruto' in the heart, dispelling the clone. The clone's strike hit Neji in the stomach, knocking the wind out of the Hyuuga and sending him Hyuuga flying several meters backwards.

After Naruto created a clone to replace the one that was just dispelled and together the ten Narutos tossed the Uzumaki Shurikens.

The moment Neji got back to his feet, he was forced to block and evade the shadow-cloned shurikens. After missing one and getting cut on the forearm, Neji began spinning, "Kaiten!"

The sound of hundreds of shurikens crashing into Neji's barrier was deafening. The moment Neji began to lose momentum, he would kick off, trying to regain his spin. He held the Kaiten for as long as he could, knowing that he would be made into a pincushion if he stopped then.

By the end, he ran out of chakra around the same time that the blades lost momentum and fell harmlessly to the ground. Neji fell as well, cutting off the flow of chakra to his technique in order to avoid fainting via chakra exhaustion. He held himself up with his hands, not forgetting for a moment about the explosion that erupted from the last fuma shurikan…and he was surrounded by ten of them. Fear clenched his heart.

"STOP!" Genma called out, having returned to the arena after the Uzumaki Shurikens stopped spinning, staring sternly at Naruto. "The match is over, the victor is Uzumaki Naruto!"

The crowed cheered at that.

Meanwhile Naruto dispelled his clones and walked over to pick up his customed fuma shuriken. The explosion was mostly a means to protect them from being taken and copied, not so much as an extra attack, though it did serve that purpose. However, without it, he needed to pick them up asap and seal them away from prying eyes. 'At least I won't have to buy new ones.' Naruto glanced at the prone body of Hyuuga Neji. If his heavy breathing was anything to go by, the boy was close to chakra exhaustion. He turned back to pick up one of his shuriken, "Glad I thought up these things, they were useful."

Neji scoffed, "You also gave away your greatest weapon in the first battle and wasted all of them!"

The blonde grinned, "First off, these things are not my greatest weapons. I actually made them like…five days ago, or something. I used them on you so people wouldn't figure out what I've actually been working on this past month." The blond grinned at Neji's shocked grin. "Oh and I didn't use all of my Uzumaki Shurikens on you…I just didn't feel it necessary to hit you with fifty-two of them at the same time." Fifty-two shuriken, plus the one he used at the beginning of the fight meant he came into the battle with fifty-three Uzumaki Shuriken. "I also have two hundred and eight exploding kunai."

"Fifty-three and two hundred and eight?"

The blond shrugged, "I hate round numbers." Then Naruto's smile widened, "Oh, and for my next invention, I think I'm going to pack an Uzumaki Shuriken with exploding shuriken." Naruto spread his arms out, "Explosions. Everywhere! It's going to be so badass!"

Up in the stands, though no one could actually hear the two boys' conversation, Tenten had another orgasm.

Sadly, even though he could freely clone kunai and shuriken, the Shuriken Kage Bunshin no jutsu wasn't sophisticated enough to copy any seals that happened to be on those weapons. Yet…

Naruto crouched down next to Neji, "I should probably mention, you know that rule back at the Academy that said we weren't allowed to have explosive tags…that rule was made for people like me."

Neji shivered at the comment.

"You weren't bad by the way. It's a pity we can't be friends, it'd be great having someone like you watching my back when I become Hokage."

"Tch!" 'Idiot, still thinking you got what it takes to become the Hokage!'

"Think about it, you can give me your answer when I change your clan."

'Huh?' Neji glared at the boy. "What?"

Naruto tapped his forehead, "I kinda get the protecting your bloodline thing, all seeing eyes whatever, but I think that being able to kill members of your family with a single hand sign is the most horrible thing ever…and I'm going to outlaw it."

Neji stared at Naruto as if he grew a second head.

The boy shrugged, "Seems like slavery to me… My Konoha, isn't going to be a place where slavery exists. It's as simple as that. All I ask is that you stop doing shit that pisses me off, like hurting your cousin."

Neji scowled at that.

Naruto glared at Neji, "She may be creepy, but she's also super nice too. Believe it or not, she actually still loves you, despite the fact that you put her in the hospital."

"And how would you know that?"

"I'm empathetic, trust me."

Neji scoffed. "So what, I watch your back and you get rid of the Caged Bird seal?"

Naruto shook his head, "No, I get rid of the Caged Bird seal…and that's it." At Neji's look the blond shrugged, "Like I said, my Konoha won't be a place where people can just enslave their family." With that, Naruto got up and turned to leave.

Though Naruto didn't know it at the time, and Neji wasn't prepared to admit it…at that moment, Naruto had just gained his first follower.

~x later x~

After several fights, Mito watched uneasily as things slowly went to hell before her eyes. Iruka immediately jumped to his feet and told her to stay where she was, before disappearing in a swirl of leaves. As if…

She jumped out of her seat, concealed herself with a genjutsu, and tried to weigh her options. She found herself completely out of the loop. She didn't know any of Konoha's defensive plans or contingencies. In the end, she could either start randomly attacking random enemy shinobi or try to find and stay with people whom she personally knew. Hiruzen and Naruto were the likeliest of choices.

The Sandaime had disappeared with the Kazekage somewhere near the top of the stadium. The blond Uzumaki had apparently spoken with his sensei and left to go on…some assignment, she assumed.

Though she longed to go with Naruto, she knew she had to find Hiruzen. Naruto was an unknown; the aged Hokage's plans had made sure of that, if nothing else. Hiruzen was the Hokage and had been for decades. If anyone were a target, it would be the Sandaime Hokage not an unknown Jinchuuriki. It was likely that this invasion had plans to deal with Hiruzen and she swore to make sure they would fail.

~x~

Miles away in the forest, Naruto, with Kakashi's dog Pakkun at his side, scanned the battlefield before him.

Sasuke and…the thing that Gaara had turned into were facing off. Sakura was trapped against a tree by, what looked to be, Gaara's sand. Temari was much further away, hiding.

He concentrated on his clairvoyant empathy so he could get a read on the battlefield.

Sasuke had anger and stung pride rolling off of him, with a tinge of fear hidden away. Gaara was pure bloodlust. He was getting nothing form Sakura…which either meant that she was unconscious or dead. 'If he killed her, I'm going to take his fucking head off!' Naruto silently swore. Temari, was fear…just fear. It pissed him off, but he turned away from her to take a look at Sakura.

He reached her with a few jumps and checked her over. 'Good, she's still breathing.' He tried pulling at the girl's bindings, but the sand seemed to circle all the way around the tree. He raised his fist and smashed it against the sand, sending cracks down it. A second strike and Sakura was free. He turned to his teammate, "SASUKE!" Naruto tossed Sakura towards Sasuke and stood between the Uchiha and the other Jinchuuriki.

Gaara growled at Naruto, "GET OUT OF MY WAY. I WILL KILL UCHIHA SASUKE!" Gaara leapt at Naruto, raising his massive hand to bat the boy away.

Naruto rushed the other Jinchuuriki and slammed him with a vertical kick that sent Gaara flying down towards the forest floor. Naruto followed shortly afterwards landing a few feet away from Gaara. He noted the surprise that rolled off of Gaara and the three spectators. Naruto glared at the boy in front of him. "I wouldn't be worried about him…"

~x~

Mito arrived at a barrier and knelt next to seven ANBU, all who were in similar positions. Within the barrier, she saw Hiruzen, in his battle armor, standing across from his former student Orochimaru of all people. The captain, an ANBU in a white cloak, recognized her as the new Fuin Master that had been working around Konoha and asked her what she thought of the barrier.

According to the captain, the barrier incinerated anything that touched it. She didn't recognize the technique, though she did note that four different individuals were channeling the barrier. She began thinking of a way to get past it when Hiruzen made eye contact with her. Though no words passed between them, and he was far to far for her to hear anything he said either way, his message was quite clear: This is my fight, stay out of it.

Mito didn't know whether it was a sense of duty or his pride that led him to such a decision, but in the end she decided to follow his wishes and leave him to fight his battle…

…until Orochimaru made the biggest mistake of his soon to be short life.

The group of ANBU glanced at the girl who had an aura of ki rolling off of her. They watched her stand, "Captain, I will bring the barrier down so please prepare your unit for battle. I will be back shortly." Not waiting for a response, Mito disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

She figured it would be an easy enough task to dispel the barrier and she'd even take out one of Orochimaru's bodyguards while she was at it. The other three would quickly join Orochimaru. She took a few moments to gaze at the four occupants, trying to determine the most dangerous.

The large boy with the Mohawk was the obvious choice, if only because he elicited a primal fear within her, as the largest of the four. However, if she learned anything over her long life, it was that size wasn't everything.

The next choice was the only female of the group. While she couldn't readily tell if she was anymore dangerous than the other three, Mito was already leaning towards her. Mito, and the ANBU unit, had the unfortunate luck of being closest to her and Mito found the girl's deplorable tongue to be quite offensive to her sense of hearing.

The next one was another boy, this one with six arms. Unknown bloodline perhaps? A possible Taijutsu specialist? He could definitely prove to be problematic.

The last choice was a silvered hair boy with TWO heads. Mito frowned as she gazed at him.

A second later, Mito returned to the ANBU unit. She turned to the captain, "I will assassinate the one with gray hair. When that happens, the barrier should dispel and leave the other three open to attack. You must not allow them to reach their master, understood." Seven heads nodded at her.

Again, she disappeared in a swirl of leaves and reappeared in front of the two headed sound-nin. Nothing but the barrier in between them. Sakon sneered at the girl in front of him, "The fuck are you looking at bitch."

Any other time, Mito might have stepped in to correct such behavior…dead people didn't need such lessons. Instead she placed her hands in the Hare hand seal, and began concentrating on the water molecules around her. She then held out her hand, curling all but her pointer and middle finger. She drew a circle, six inches in diameter, in the air, blue symbols forming after her fingers, "Fuinjutsu: Reigen Tenshi (Sealing Art: Heartless Angel)". Sakon flinched at the circle of light that appeared between him and Mito. Even with the purple barrier obstructing his sight of everything on the outside, he still found the light to be blinding. It also successfully distracted Sakon from the distortion that appeared behind him. Mito then grabbed an explosive note and tossed it at the circle. The note disappeared the moment it hit the circle and reappeared in the distortion behind Sakon. Ukon's eyes widened at the lit up explosive note. Mito dispelled the circle and distortion concurrently. A moment later, the note exploded.

What remained of Sakon, and Ukon, were forced into the purple wall and incinerated almost instantly. A second later, the barrier dropped. The remainder of the Sound Four were shocked to find their defense gone and even more surprised when a pair of ANBU jumped each of them.

Mito paid them no mind, instead she just walked towards the four figures that had originally been isolated by the barrier: Hiruzen, the idiot that created a disgusting ninjutsu, the soon to be dead Snake Sannin, and…her late husband.

Hiruzen sighed as he glanced at Mito. Not that he could particularly blame her. If the situation were reversed, he sure as hell wouldn't wait around on the sidelines. He just prayed that she wasn't too out of practice. Orochimaru turned to glare at the person that derailed his plans.

She didn't waste any such time. Again she placed her hands in the Hare seal, this time drawing out more chakra. "Fuinjutsu: Reigen Tenshi (Sealing Art: Heartless Angel)". Again, a blue circle appeared a few feet in front of Mito. A moment later, fifteen similar circles appeared around to the first one.

Orochimaru tensed up as he tried to look through the 'wall' of light. The blinding light effectively cut off the mysterious redhead from his line of sight…

…It also made it next to impossible to notice the sixteen distortions that surrounded Orochimaru and the two undead Hokage.

Behind the wall, Mito pulled out a pouch that contained fifty painted senbon needles. The first one she threw hit the center circle, disappeared, reappeared from one of the distortions and nailed the Nidaime in the back of the head. The other forty-nine needles followed a moment later, each disappearing after hitting a different circle and reappearing from different distortions.

Before the Snake Sannin knew it, he, along with the two undead Hokages, were turned into pincushions. Orochimaru cursed himself for allowing the girl to distract him with a simple light trick. He was about to pull out one of the needles when he felt a strange chakra emerge from them.

Eyes wide, Orochimaru quickly shed his skin, concurrently freeing himself from the senbon, before using a simple Kawarimi to escape the area.

For a moment, just one instant, Mito's eyes met with Hashirama's. A pang of guilt erupted in her chest as she placed her hands in the Dragon Seal, "Raiju!" (3). Each senbon needle discharged electricity with the force of a lightning bolt, and together, unleashed a 'blue explosion' that engulfed the Shodaime and Nidaime, as well as Orochimaru's discarded skin. When it cleared the smell of ozone filled the air. The floor, which was actually roof tiles, underneath them cracked and turned to dust. All traces of the two Hokages were gone.

Orochimaru was shocked that the girl's attack seemed to have actually destroyed corpses resurrected by the Edo Tensei. After a moment, however, he felt the corpses begin to regenerate…slowly.

"Katon: Karyu Endan (Fire Dragon Flame Bullet)!"

Distracted a second time, Orochimaru leapt to the right to avoid a fire dragon that would have burn him to ash. He turned to see the user, an ANBU, with a white cloak that marked him as a captain. Sadly, for the Snake Sannin, he didn't notice when his former sensei appeared behind him, staff in hand, and took his head clean off.

Orochimaru shed his skin again.

Meanwhile, Mito took the opportunity to seal the remains of the two dead Kage before they could regenerate.

Hiruzen, with Enma in the form of a staff, and Orochimaru, with the Kusanagi, were trading blows. Orochimaru was careful enough to keep the Sandaime between himself and the ANBU captain, but even he knew when things were going south. He could see that Jirobo was already down, pierced through the chest by a spear of dirt of all things, and that Tayuya and Kidomaru were slowly being pushed back by the pair of ANBU they each fought.

"Your guards are falling, Orochimaru!" Hiruzen growled. "Your treachery will NOT overcome the leaf village!"

'Pity, they made such good subjects.' Orochimaru glared at the old man and they crossed weapons. "This isn't the end you old fool, you grow slower and more feeble every single day! I will return to burn this accursed village to the ground and salt the earth!" Orochimaru leapt backwards and spewed out a cloud of black smoke. He turned to escape, but only managed to get five steps away before an unseen forced pulled him to the ground. The ground/roof around Orochimaru began glowing in strange symbols. He tried to get up, but found his body far too heavy to do so.

From the right, he saw the mysterious redhead some distance away. From his hand, the Kusanagi disappeared. He then growled and extended his neck out of the seal's area of effect. Orochimaru's neck continued to stretch to gross proportions. Orochimaru opened his mouth, regurgitating a snake, which regurgitated the Kusanagi. Orochimaru's head continued on its path towards the redhead, prepared to stab her with the legendary blade.

Mito made no move. When Orochimaru's blade was a few feet away from piercing Mito, a purpled eyed black rabbit jumped in it's path. The rabbit parried the Kusanagi with a katana big enough for a grown human to wield. The two blades clashed and the Kusanagi managed to create a centimeter long nick in the rabbit's blade…but otherwise the katana held.

A second later Orochimaru's abnormally long neck was cut in half by Hiruzen's staff and his body, which was still trapped within the weight seal, was engulfed by a second Katon: Karyu Endan.

Orochimaru shed his skin again.

When he was back on his feet, he found himself surrounded by Hiruzen, Mito, the ANBU captain and the black rabbit. With his peripheral vision he saw that Kidomaru's head was separated from his shoulders and Tayuya was currently surrounded by the other six ANBU.

He realized escape was, indeed, his only viable option. Orochimaru bit his thumb and did a quick chain of hand seals and leapt backwards as far as he could, "Kuchiyose: Sanju Rashomon." Three enormous demonic gates suddenly appeared, shooting out of the ground, between Orochimaru and his opponents.

As Orochimaru turned to escape, he used his still bleeding thumb as a catalyst for his next jutsu, "Kuchiyose no jutsu." A large explosion of smoke erupted around Orochimaru and suddenly the Snake Sannin found himself standing on Manda.

However, before the smoke fully cleared, and Manda could adjust to his surroundings, "Kuchiyose: Yatai Kuzushi no jutsu (Summoning: Food Cart Destroy technique)." The Toad Boss, known as Gamabunta, landed on Manda's head and slamming it against the ground, crushing the Snake Sannin in the process. The giant toad then took his sword and stuck it through the snout of the Snake Boss.

Fearing for his life, Manda swallowed his pride and quickly dispelled itself. Orochimaru shed his skin again.

Tired, of fucking dying, and nearly out of chakra, the Snake Sannin looked up to find himself surround. Jiraiya and Gamabunta blocked his back. Hiruzen, Mito, the black rabbit and the ANBU captain, who finally got around the Rashomon gates, blocked his front. Finally, the six ANBU that were dealing with his bodyguards surrounded him from the left and the right. After weighing his options and chances, Orochimaru could only sigh in annoyance.

Hiruzen raised his staff and pointed it at the Snake Sannin, "Stand down Orochimaru!"

From his peripherals, Orochimaru saw something that made him grin. "You fools! While you waste your time with me, the Ichibi will level your precious village to the ground!"

Twelve pairs of eyes turned towards the sight of the Bijuu Shukaku, who towered over even the largest buildings in the village.

Orochimaru grinned, "Weep at your own weakness as you watch your beloved village-"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" The sand Bijuu screamed out before it was engulfed two hundred and eight explosions. A large cloud of smoke concealed it from everyone's sight.

Orochimaru paled…which was medically possible for him to do. After the smoke cleared and Shukaku was nowhere to be seen, twelve pairs of eyes turned back towards Orochimaru.

The Snake Sannin slapped his hand on his forehead.

~End~


Omake: Piquerism (a.k.a. the recruitment that was too ridiculous NOT to be an Omake)

A mere day after the failed invasion, Mito found herself at the Senju compound, sitting on one of the couches. And she was not alone. Mito sighed as she looked over the piece of paper that had been trust into her hand. "…Tenten-san, forgive my familiarity but I am having difficulty reading your surname."

Tenten smiled up at the slightly older girl, "You can call me Uzumaki if you want!"

"I doubt your parents would approve." Mito looked over the paper and scowled, "Please stop rubbing your cheek against my feet."

Tenten frowned, but didn't let go of Mito's bare feet. "Would you like a foot massage?"

"No I would not." The moment Tenten had the chance, she began hunting down Naruto to persuade him into giving her a free lesson. When she found out that Naruto had a sensei, a sensei who supposedly taught him everything he knew in just under a month, she switched targets. Unfortunately for the girl… "Forgive Tenten-san, but I am not accepting any students at this time."

Tenten's eyes widened, "But you accepted Naruto!"

Mito nodded, "We are kin, Naruto and I. It is a different matter."

Tenten released her feet and grabbed onto Mito's legs. She HAD to learn how to create the Uzumaki Shuriken. She just had to get her hands on that type of hardcore weaponry. "Then adopt me!"

Mito flinched at the girl's contact. "I apologize, but I am not adopting any new members into my clan at this time."

"THEN ACCEPT ME AS YOUR SEX SLAVE!"

Mito blushed at the girl's comment. "I apologize, but I am not accepting any sex slaves at this time."

"THEN ACCEPT ME AS YOUR BROODMARE! YOU GUYS NEED TO REVIVE YOUR CLAN RIGHT? I'LL GIVE YOU LOT'S OF BABIES!"

At that moment, Naruto and Sasuke happened to be walking by the doorway to the living area that Mito and Tenten occupied. The two had been training in the grounds just moments ago.

Naruto's eyes were wide. He slowly scooted away. 'What the hell?'

Sasuke just narrowed his eyes at the girl, before shaking his head in disgust. 'Man…some people will do anything for power.' He then followed after Naruto.

Mito paled, "I apologize, but I am not accepting any…broodmares at this time." Mito stood up and began moving, as best as she could with Tenten holding her legs, towards the door. "I am sorry my dear, but you have wasted your time."

"NO, DON'T SAY THAT!" Tenten clutched onto the older girl harder than before. Eventually though, Mito managed to drag herself and Tenten to the door. "PLEASE MISTRESS, TEACH ME HOW TO MAKE SUPER WEAPONS!"

"My dear…" Mito opened the front door. The appearance of Jiraiya stopped her line of thought. "Jiraiya…"

Before she could say anything further, Tenten stood up and got in Jiraiya's face. Tenten seethed with barely controlled rage, "Your presence offends the Mistress!"

Jiraiya cocked an eyebrow.

Tenten then kicked the man in the crotch. When Jiraiya bent forward to clutch himself, she punched him in the face. Tenten then slammed the door shut and turned to smile back at Mito.

Mito just stared at the girl for a few moments. "Tenten-san…"

Tenten looked at the older girl with longing eyes.

"Perhaps there IS something I can teach you after all."

Tenten's eyes widened, she fell to her knees and clutched the older girl's legs. "Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Mito nodded and patted the girl on the back. "Your welcome. Please return here at seven tomorrow morning." They stayed in that position for well over a minute. "Please let go of my legs."

Tenten took a long whiff of the other girl's clothes, "In a minute, I just want to bask in your awesome."

"My dear, I believe you should seek psychiatric help."

"Already did that…took them five sessions to diagnose me with piquerism."

"Hmmm…"

~End~


(1) Naruto's outfit is, loosely, based on the outfit worn by Black Star from the anime Soul Eater (which I don't own). Oh, and Mito's friend, Kurohoshi (heh) is an expy of Black Star…who I'm pretty sure is an expy of Naruto…See that? That's a full circle.

(2) It really SHOULDN'T be so hard to curse in Japanese.

(3) Raiju: A beast that falls to earth in a lightning bolt

A/N: Hope you guys liked this chapter. Had someone ask me, during a review of the last chapter, if I could do an Omake where Naruto spams Neji with Shuriken Kage Bunshins…didn't think it was necessary though. I guess I could for the next chapter if you still really want me to…

Anyway, I hope to have the next chapter up next week.