WHAT HURTS THE MOST


A/N: The events referred to in this story happens in KisstheSmurf's story I Love You Handy. So nothing belongs to me. But I might have found myself bending the events a little to fit the song.


I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house

That don't bother me

I can take a few tears now and then

And just let them out

It was a little while after Handy found out about the unsmurfy secret Hefty has kept form him until recently. They had flat out stopped talking to one another. Hefty couldn't even be in the same room as his once called mate.

It was heavily raining outside as the body-builder lies on the couch, listening to the whooshing of the rain on the roof. He cried a few times before, but for now the tears were at bay.

I'm not afraid to cry

Every once in a while

Even tough going on without you still upsets me

"What happens now?"

Hefty tries to keep the bitter thoughts at bay. He was scared. What would he smurf now, now that he and Handy weren't together anymore. Time has passed and the mechanic didn't smurf him a single word, staying locked up in their once was room.

There are days

Every now and again

I pretend I'm ok

But that's not what gets me

But there where days that he had pretended that he was ok with how things were smurfing on right now.

And when night falls he would always admit defeat…He missed Handy.

What hurts the most

Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

Hefty had so much to say to the younger Smurf, he wished he could smurf them, even if Handy didn't listen. He needed them to come out. He needed everything to smurfy between them again.

Never knowing

What could've been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do

Handy didn't understand what happened that night. He didn't know how much it confused Hefty. Or why he didn't smurf the problem to him sooner.

Why does heartbreak have to hurt so much?

It's hard to force that smile

When I see our old friends

And I'm alone

Still harder

He had already smurfed an extremely long letter to the rest in the village, explaining what happened, and he tried to tell them that he was okay. But whole thing felt forced to him.

Getting up

Getting dressed

Living with this regret

But if I could do it over

I would trade, give away all the words

That I saved in my heart

That I left unspoken

It was so hard for Hefty to go on, living with so much regret. He wished he could turn back time and smurf those words he wanted to smurf for so long. That He could make everything better for the both of them.

"It's time. It's time that he knows that we're going to separate. It's too much to live under the same roof as him when I smurfed so much damage.

Hefty drew in a deep breathe as he finally spoke for the first time in weeks.

"Handy…?"

He sensed the smaller Smurf's tension at the sound of his voice, adding: "It's okay… you don't have ta speak. But just for one moment, there is something I need to tell you..."

What hurts the most

Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

"I know it's been weeks since we haven't spoken to each other after what happened, and I feel gratefully awful for what I had caused ya. I've been thinkin' for some time now, and I think it's time I told ya…about us separating…"

Inside the room, Handy's eyes widens as he sits up.

Hefty contuied: "Therefore, I smurfed another letter back to the village a few weeks ago about what happened. I told them everything what I told you."

Never knowing

What could've been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do

"I told them I was very sorry that I smurfed everything up when I was with Smurfette at the time. The truth is…I wanted to be with her before I had known you worked so hard on the jewelry you smurfed for her. However, after I came to ya that day, I felt truly awful and ashamed thinkin' what I wanted. I've been so selfish…and I knew I shouldn't have smurfed to her place to tell her off when I knew ya still needed me."

I'm not afraid to cry

Every once in a while

Even tough going on without you still upsets me

Handy looked down sadly, listening to everything Hefty had to say. He felt as if he wanted to say something, but somehow wasn't able to. Hefty sighed sadly from outside the door as he continued.

"And I think it's best for the both us once our friend smurf us back the letter… you should return home. I asked them if they would try to speak to Papa for me so that you can go back. As for me…" As for me..." Before he would say anything else, he looked down sadly as his eyes started to water more. "...I will be staying here..."

Soon tears fell down from his face as he closes his eyes while he spoke. "I'll be alright... So you don't have to worry about me. I'll have Feathers take you first thing once Wolke arrives with the letter and you can smurf back to the village. I know I'm not wanted around anymore after the trouble I had smurfed. And... I know everyone back home misses you very much and need you more than ever."

There are days

Every now and again

I pretend I'm ok

But that's not what gets me

Back inside, the engineer could not believe what he was hearing as he then gets up and slowly walks to the door, placing his hand on it.

"I'm sorry for everything I have done to you, and for everyone else. I know you'd be better off without me around anymore. And I know the other Smurfs would feel the same way too, especially Papa. I still can't get over the day he shunned us. But I know he was angry with me the most, and I don't blame him. And... I figure he wouldn't want me back anyway after he had found out about us."

Before he could say another word, he felt a really sharp pain inside piercing through his heart as he clenched his chest tighter. He tried not to stir a scene and said his final words to him.

What hurts the most

Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

"Promise me... no matter what the letter says; I want you to go home. I want what is best for you... and I don't want you to suffer having to be away for this long. I'll be fine... I just want you to be happy... because I'd do anything for you as long as you have me."

Hefty's heart started to hurt him more until he started to strain a bit and felt very weak from not doing anything for so long. "But... it's too late for us now... because... my heart is already broken..."

Handy's tears already fell down his face again as he listened to Hefty and feels his body shaking. Hefty then took his hand off the door as he reached into his pocket for Handy's necklace and looked at it once last time. After he gazed at it for a short while, he looked back up to the door and said to him softly one last time, "Goodbye, Handy... I will always love you, even though we can't be together anymore..."

Once he had finally finished speaking, more tears fell and landed onto the floor. As Hefty was about to leave, he let the necklace slide off from his hand and let it fall to the floor in front of the bedroom floor. He put his head down sadly with a sad heavy weight on his heart as he left to leave the house. The strongman opened the front door to go leave until he looked back to see if Handy would still have the heart to come running after him. But sadly, he didn't. Hefty soon turned away sadly and finally left the house and closed the door.

Never knowing

What could've been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do

Soon after Handy heard the front door close, he finally unlocks the bedroom door, opening it slowly. He looks around and notices his necklace on the ground. He kneels down and picks it up, looking at it as he feels more tears streaming down and held the necklace close to his heart. Afterwards, the mechanic gets up again, running outside to see if Hefty was still there. It was very dark out and the temperature had dropped a bit as it started to feel a little cold. Handy then looks around hastily but doesn't see him anywhere, as he suddenly shouts for him.

"Hefty! Hefty!"

What hurts the most

Was being so close

And having so much to say

And watching you walk away

Feathers suddenly wakes from her slumber and starts squawking at the commotion going on. Handy kept shouting his name until he gave up in defeat and let himself fall down on his knees and began to cry. As he cried, Feathers got up from her nest and seen him until she nuzzled her head against him, squawking softly in a sad tone. The little Smurf quickly turns to the stork and hugs her, still crying.

"Oh, Feathers..." he said as he looks to her." Feathers, where did he go...?"

Never knowing

What could've been

And not seeing that loving you

Is what I was trying to do

Oh, Feathers..." he said as he looks to her. "Feathers, where did he go...?"

All she could do was shrug and put her head down. Then suddenly, she heard a sound of a bird coming from the sky as she looked up seeing Wolke had finally returned. Handy also looks up and sees the little smurfberry bird and wipes his tears away a little. Wolke soon lands safely, seeing both Handy and Feathers outside and chirped happily with another letter that seemed much longer than the last one he smurfed back to the village.

"Hello, Wolke..." Handy softly said looking down to him and notices the letter. He hesitated a little until he removes it from his leg, unrolling it and starts to read. The letter seemed really long and wondered who had written back to them. His eyes widened with his jaw dropped as he read the letter more and couldn't believe his eyes. After he finished reading the letter he looks back up to Feathers again and cried, "...We need to find him!"


A/N: The reason why I did this is because I understand what Hefty went trough at the time, since my boyfriend just left me and I'm still trying to live with it. We're in the boat, so to speak. Well, remember to review.