I had been 3 weeks since I had seen Rachel. The wedding had been called off and she had left before I could find her. I went to her apartment, but no one was there. I called her cell 3 times a day, but it was turned off. I just needed to talk to her; I couldn't leave things like that. I had decided that I would go to her parents' house, I had the address from a long time ago, and I hoped they still lived in the same house. I pulled up in my car and knocked on the door, Leroy answered straight away.

"Santana" he smiled warmly "I'm guessing you're here for Rachel" he looked solemn.

"Yes, is she in?" I asked, obviously she had told him about what had happened between us.

"Well, no" he said surprised I had asked, "She's in the hospital" he was talking like it was obvious.

"Wait? What?!" what they hell was happening. "Is she okay" I started to panic.

"Did she..." it was his turn to look shocked "Did she not tell you?"

I shook my head "Tell me what" I tried to keep my voice as calm as possible.

"Santana... Rachel has Leukaemia" Leroy's eyes were watering as were mine. "She's stopped responding to treatment"

Just at that moment the phone rang. Leroy answered it and looked heartbroken as he talked to the person on the other end. "I'll be right there" he finally said and hung up. "I think you should come with me. That was the hospital"

I nodded "We can take my car"

When we arrived at the hospital we rushed to the ward that she was in. She had a private room and my heart broke when I saw her lying there in her bed. Her eyelids were fluttering, and it looked like it was a struggle for her to keep them open.

"Santana" she whispered happily as she saw me. I smiled and went over to her side. I pulled over a chair and sat next to her, holding her hand that still had light pink nail polish from her wedding day. Leroy and Hiram came in, both with red eyes but looked like they were trying to hide it from her. Hiram came over and whispered something in my ear that made me want to break down but I had to be strong for her.

"I'm so sorry Rachel, for everything. "

"I forgive you" her weak voice said.

"Is this why you didn't go to Nyada" It was all making sense to me now.

She managed a small nod "And why I married Jesse. I didn't want to die alone" A tear ran down her face.

"You've got me. You'll always have me. I'm not going to leave you, I'm going to stay with you all night" I lifted her hands up to my lips and kissed it. "Why didn't you tell me?" I asked her.

It took a while for her to respond. "I was scared" is all she managed to stay.

I brushed her hair behind her ear. "You don't need to be scared any more. I'm here now. "She smiles slightly. "I love you"

"I love you too" she whispers. Her eyelids flutter shut. The heart monitor starts beeping.

"Goodbye my star" Hiram says as Leroy kisses her cheek,

"Rachel" I say. "You can't" I shake my head "No. Rachel Please" I put my head in my hands and started crying. I had lost her; she had gone up to heaven with all the other angels. Even in death, she looked beautiful, the most beautiful person I had ever met.

It was so hard of me to walk out of the hospital that day. I couldn't believe that after all these years, all the breakups, the love, the longing; I had lost her again, but this time, forever. No. I would see her again, after this life had finished, I knew I would be with her. She would always be in my heart, for as long as I would live. I would always remember Miss Rachel Berry, an ambitious Broadway wannabe who I came to love so much.

I pulled out my diary and started to write

I cannot say, and I will not say
That Rachel is dead. She is just away.
With a cheery smile, and a wave of the hand,
she has wandered into an unknown land
And left us dreaming how very fair
it needs must be, since she lingers there.
And you—oh you, who the wildest yearn
for an old-time step, and the glad return,
think of her faring on, as dear
in the love of There as the love of Here.
Think of him still as the same. I say,
Rachel is not dead—she is just away.

A/N: So I have finally finished this story. It took me so long to decide if I wanted it to end this way. I did at first but I kept changing my mind and ended up writing two endings. I may later upload the happy ending, so you can chose for yourself how you want it to end. But not for a while anyway, if you want me to let me know.

Also I just wanted to add that I have made a YouTube video which is sort of a trailer off this fanfiction. I have it linked on my page if you want to watch it. Btw the quote at the end isn't mine, it's from James Whitcomb Riley but I saw it and loved it. I had to change it a little as it said 'He' so I changed it to She.

Thank you for reading; I hope you enjoyed this fanfiction