Nozomi was anxious, and with good reason. She was wearing a kimono that she had never thought she would be able to wear, and Temari fussing over her with the approval of her two assistants wasn't helping at all. Gaara was in another room, also being fussed over by his brother and one of the few people who actually knew what he was supposed to do at this time.
So as she looked out the slit nervously, she was very surprised to see her owl return with another message from her old friend.
Under henge, right near the door on the left.
She looked...and suddenly all her nervous energy finally vanished.
She had seen his preferred Henge the day he left her. Though she had bitterly cursed the teacher who had sent him away with that police report.
Sure, they ignored obvious signs of abuse from her relatives but the moment someone takes an interest in her well being enough to teach her how to fight, suddenly the faculty take action. It was hypocrisy at it's finest.
The lawsuit she later hit the school with courtesy of the goblins sent more than one crappy teacher to the unemployment line. The very few teachers who had tried to do something before they were forced to stop had at least kept their jobs...even if they were sent to other schools.
"Alright, what the hell is up? One second you're nervous as someone facing Gaara in a battle before he calmed down, now you're completely relaxed," asked Temari. As the sister of the groom, she was her second while Naruto (who had just managed to convince the sannin to take a break from their training journey long enough to come) was Gaara's best man.
"My first real friend finally showed up," she said.
Temari looked at her surprised.
"Where are they?"
Nozomi gave her precise coordinates, and Temari stared.
"That old guy who looks like an older Naruto with black hair and green eyes?"
"His name is Obito. He's the one who taught me enough about chakra that I was able to actually learn jutsu. If it wasn't for him, I never would have tried to learn Japanese or how to use weapons."
"I never knew that."
"Neither does Gaara. I'm hoping he'll stay long enough for me to introduce him to my friends. He's originally from Konoha if I remember right."
Temari stared a little longer, before returning to her previous task of make up coordination. Kiseki had to deal with jewelry while Tsurara adjusted the kimono.
Luna was the one keeping Nozomi from moving too much during the entire process.
Fifteen minutes later, the music started and Nozomi did exactly as she had been taught.
Two hours later, she and Gaara were finally married. Obito waited until there was a chance to give her a kiss on the cheek.
"Glad to see you smiling, little Hope. Though I suppose you're not so little anymore," said Obito.
"I'm so glad you could make it!" she said with relief.
"Nozomi, who is this?"
"My very first friend. He was the one who got me interest in the shinobi arts and Japanese language. Gaara, meet Obito Uchiha, my first sensei."
"It's a pleasure to meet you. Nozomi told me quite a bit before she took up the interim Kage position," said Obito, holding out his hand.
Gaara shook it firmly, noting the calluses. The warmth in the man's eyes proved he was as kind as his new wife had claimed...though there was something off about him.
"Why are you under a henge?" he finally asked.
"A few old friends here would recognize me too quickly. Unless you would like to see that old scarecrow in the corner look like he's seen a ghost?"
"Only if you give me time to bring out the camera," said Nozomi mischievously.
Obito chuckled. It seemed Suna had done wonders for Nozomi.
Sometime before the after party dispersed, Nozomi made sure to talk to the Konoha shinobi, including Kakashi. Obito pretended to come up with her as an old acquaintance, but in reality was handing her the camera.
She signaled Naruto to get ready with his, which he carried everywhere. Hanging around Nozomi had taught him the fine art of blackmail and incriminating evidence. Something Jiraiya had cursed more than once.
Kakashi quickly noted the henge, and discreetly removed it thinking it was an assassin because of the fact he was right behind her and next to the drink table.
The look of absolute shock on his face remained long enough for Nozomi and Naruto to take three pictures before he fainted. Naruto grinned evilly as he took many pictures...before finally removing the infamous mask and taking so many of that before he realized someone else was behind him looking with interest.
"Huh, so that's what he looked like under that."
Naruto turned to find a man roughly Kakashi's age with only his right eye...wearing an Uchiha crest on his back.
"Who are you? And why did he faint when he saw you?"
Obito chuckled evilly, which alerted Naruto that the man was a prankster like him.
"My name is Uchiha. Uchiha Obito. And I used to be his teammate before a rock slide caused by an Iwa nin killed me."
Naruto paled a bit before he heard Nozomi laughing. She was telling her guests why Kakashi was passed out cold looking like he had been slapped silly with a fish.
"At least it was supposed to kill me. My magic saved me before I could die. So how do you know him?"
"He's my genin sensei. Wait, if you're an Uchiha, does that mean you're related to Sasuke-teme?"
Obito grinned widely.
"Sasuke? As in Mikoto and Fugaku's youngest? I remember him vaguely. Last time I saw him he nearly ripped out Fugaku's hair and had lobbed a fairly good sized glob of vomit on Itachi's shirt."
Naruto, realizing who Obito was, grinned evilly.
"Do you have any other embarrassing stories you'd care to share?" he asked, eyes glinting.
Obito slung an arm around him (dispelling the worry Naruto had that he was a solid ghost) and grinned like the prankster he was.
"Oh my boy, I have loads of stories to tell you."
If Kakashi had been conscious, he would have felt the shiver that came from an unholy alliance bent on humiliating him with personal information no one should ever know...
The next morning saw a change in Suna. Gaara and Nozomi spent their honeymoon in the village close to Suna that was a known tourist hot spot, since Gaara couldn't leave too far away from Suna.
Meanwhile, Naruto had found an evil ally in Obito, the most un-Uchiha like person he had ever met. And he finally learned where his sensei got his Sharingan eye. Naturally the two pranksters hit it off like old friends.
Naruto was howling with laughter as Obito told him pranks against Kakashi, and some of the more outrageous excuses he used. Obito was chuckling when he learned of Naruto's pranks, and had been impressed by the boy's Oiroke no Jutsu.
Kakashi, once he got over his shock and learned that yes, Obito was in fact alive and there for the wedding, soon found his old teammate...and learned how the magic and Nozomi had changed the man who used to come to missions late with the most silly excuses.
Obito was highly amused that Kakashi seemed to inherit his little quirk and was annoyed that he stole some of his better excuses. Finding out that the same rule abiding teen turned into an irredeemable pervert, however, made him laugh his ass off.
When Naruto reluctantly left with Jiraiya, they found they had a new traveling companion. Naruto couldn't be happier, since Obito was a walking encyclopedia of jutsu and magic thanks to his sharingan and travels over the years, but Jiraiya was still worried.
(For a little while, this story will focus on Obito until he returns to Suna and visits Nozomi...a day before Deidara and Sasori show up to kidnap Gaara. Then the real fun will begin...after I catch up to Shippuden. I am sadly very behind on that aspect of Naruto.)
Obito knew the toad sage recognized him, and he wasn't happy about the fact that he joined him on the journey with Naruto. Even if Obito did earn his keep by helping Naruto in his training. He knew quite a lot of wind ninjutsu, most of which came from the Fourth Hokage himself.
And he wasn't a fool like most of Konoha. The moment he laid eyes on the boy he knew who Naruto was.
Naruto was the child Minato and Kushina were going to have before he changed his mind about returning home. He had been gone so long that the idea of returning to an empty house broke his heart. His mother had died in her sleep a few weeks after she learned he had died saving his teammate, and learning Kakashi had his sharingan hadn't helped.
And Minato didn't need the distraction of reacquainting him back into the Konoha shinobi forces.
About a month of traveling with Jiraiya, he waited for Naruto to go to bed before cornering the perverted sannin.
"We need to talk."
"I agree. I've waited long enough, and you have some explaining to do."
Obito sat down drinking his sake slowly.
"Why did you wait so long to reveal yourself?" asked Jiraiya.
"My memories were too painful, especially after sensei died because of my ancestor's tricks."
"Madara. He was there Jiraiya. I saw him slip into some cave...and then ten minutes later there was a scream and the most cold chakra I have ever felt came out. Next thing I know the Kyuubi is loose and Kushina was barely hanging on by a thread. I did what I could to save her and protect Naruto. You should have seen her face when she realized who I was."
"I can imagine."
"I managed to heal the worst of the injuries, and handed Naruto to sensei. I didn't know he was going to seal the Kyuubi into him. Sensei was shocked, but from what I could tell he thought that because he was so close to dying anyway I had to be ghost."
"Did sensei know you were there?"
"I was the one who recovered him from the corpse of Minato-sensei. Sarutobi saw me but I don't think he recognized who I was at the time. No one bothered to stop me when I left."
"Why didn't you stay? Protect Naruto?"
Obito looked at the sannin squarely.
"Because of what I am. I survived that rock slide because I have magic. More than most at any rate. It took all I had just to come near Konoha. You know how the attitude towards magicals was back then. If they knew..."
Jiraiya conceded his point. If Obito had returned at that time, after his death was released, it would raise a lot of questions...and when they learned how he survived, they would have treated him just as bad as Naruto.
"Where have you been? And why did you come back now of all times?"
"First off, after I learned I had magic and saved Naruto, I went to England. It was there that I found a little girl with bright green eyes that reminded me so much of Itachi, only heavily abused. Her name...was Hope."
"Nozomi? The blushing bride and interim Kage of Suna?" he said in surprise.
"The same. She was only six, but she barely looked like she was four. None of the teachers at her school even noticed or cared about the signs. I taught her what I could, and not one of them cared that she was skipping class. It wasn't until someone noticed I was taking a real interest in her that they got suspicious and called the police. I had to leave her, but not without at least giving her someone to talk to that she could trust to listen."
"You're the one who showed her how to unlock her chakra?"
"I was. I spent the next few years keeping her from slitting her wrists out of despair when suddenly she started replying though that owl of hers. If it wasn't for her distinct handwriting on the letter I might have killed it. After that I kept her from loosing herself in that damn magical community that tried to crush her with their expectations."
"How bad was it?"
"They expected an eleven year old child to protect them from their Dark Lord problem, and they didn't even care to check on her once she was out of school for the summer. I was the only person she could trust without question. It was because of me she learned that her two friends who she thought she could trust with her secret turned out to be spies for the headmaster. And thanks to me she knew enough about the Elemental nations to survive living there without giving away her secret."
"Why did you come back now though?"
"Simple. Nozomi asked me to come for the wedding, and I saw the signs that the winds of fate were blowing. And I knew she would be right in the center of that mess."
"She was your first student wasn't she?"
"The only one I have ever taken."
Jiraiya sighed. While he wasn't happy that a boy who was Minato's supposedly dead student suddenly showed up, he could see the bright side. Obito harbored Naruto no ill will, and he could help the boy more than Jiraiya himself could with his elemental training.
"So tell me, how did it feel to be a teacher?"
"It was one of the best feelings in the world," said Obito, raising his sake glass.
Jiraiya laughed heartily and poured him another glass.
"A toast then, to teachers and their insanely powerful students!" said Jiraiya.
"Here, here!" chuckled Obito.
The two clinked their glasses, and proceeded to get drunk off their asses.
Naruto walked in on an amusing sight, and made sure to take a picture for blackmail later.
Obito and Jiraiya, both suffering with the monster of all hangovers, looking like they wanted to die right then and there.
Still, he liked Obito enough not to laugh at them. Jiraiya he would have made suffer though.
"What can you hold down?" he asked quietly.
"Bread. And bacon if you can manage it. Hang on while I place a silencer on my ears..." groaned Obito.
Naruto grinned evilly...and once the silence charm was on he said loudly "And what would you like to eat Pervy Sage?"
"DAMMIT BRAT, TONE DOWN THE VOLUME! OW!" yelped Jiraiya.
Naruto let out a bark of laughter, and Obito grinned. Naruto was like a younger version of him, only he had more chakra. Luckily for him he could read lips.
"What's on the schedule for today Obito-nii?"
Obito didn't mind one bit that Naruto called him big brother. As far as he was concerned, they were practically related anyway.
"More wind jutsu, once I take a hangover cure."