Disclaimer: I own none of the characters here. I just use them for my own enjoyment. Please don't sue. I have nothing of value anyway.
Author's note: This is just a fic about Mulder and Scully and their feelings for one another. Set somewhere in season 6.. It's Valentine's Day and neither of them want to spend the evening alone. They are both struggling with their feelings and wanting to tell the other person how they feel.
All of Your Glances…
I know you've heard the excuses before
So I won't waste your time and I'll keep this short
I've bound my emotions 'cause I can't afford to be wrong
I know we've talked about being good friends
So we've been real careful of the signals we've sent
But all of your glances they came and they went to my head
And I'm not a man to throw words to the wind
When I said "I love you" that's what I meant
And I plan to show you if it takes me the rest of my life….Blessid Union of Souls
Today was Valentine's day. Mulder had no date, but he certainly had a love in mind as he sat at his desk absently scanning through files. He looked over at Scully who was engrossed in paperwork and wondered what she was thinking about. It was something he did a lot. Just staring at her, wondering what was inside her head. He never could quite figure it out.
"So Scully, any big plans for tonight?" he asked her.
"Tonight? No, not really. Why?"
"It's Valentine's Day. I thought maybe you had a hot date."
She laughed slightly. "No hot date here. Just me and a glass of wine most likely."
She had almost forgotten it was Valentine's Day. It wasn't a day that held much importance to her. Not for a very long time. It was just another reminder that she was alone. Not that she wanted to be alone, but that's how life had worked things out. She had someone she cared very much for, but it's not like she could call him her Valentine.
"You wanna come to my place tonight then? We could have a few drinks, watch a stupid movie?" he offered her.
"I guess so."
"Only if you want to."
"Yeah, that sounds good to me."
Mulder smiled at her. He loved this woman and he wanted the chance to tell her. To show her. The last time he tried to tell her, she ignored him and thought he was a drugged up lunatic. But he wasn't. He knew exactly what he had said to her that night. The drugs might have made his lips looser, but it didn't mean they didn't speak the truth. And he wanted her to know that. And what better day than Valentine's Day to show her that?
"You wanna get pizza or Chinese?" he asked her.
"Chinese. I'm in the mood for a good spring roll."
"It's done then. It'll be fun. We can eat and talk about how much cupid sucks," he told her with a smile.
"Cupid does suck. I have to agree with you there."
If Cupid didn't suck, Scully wouldn't find herself in love with her partner. That was unacceptable to her. But what could she do? It had happened anyway. Without her permission. And if Cupid did exist, he had a bad sense of humor.
"What movie should I get?" he asked her.
"Whatever you want. I'll probably fall asleep during it anyway."
A sleeping Scully. Something he loved to see. He loved the way her face relaxed and sometimes there was a faint smile across her lips. He'd give anything to know what she dreamed about. Did she ever dream about him? He knew that he dreamt about her often enough. The chance to dream about her was the only thing that put him to sleep on some nights.
"Should I bring something?" Scully asked him, breaking him out of his daydreams.
"You can if you want. If you want wine, you should grab a bottle. All I have is beer and whiskey."
"Are you going to drink the wine with me or am I chugging it out of the bottle?" she asked with a small laugh.
"I'd love to see you chug it out of the bottle. Classy."
"You're just trying to get me drunk."
"No I'm not. Although I have to admit I wouldn't mind seeing that."
"Well the way I'm feeling right now, you just might get your wish."
She hated that she was relegated to spending Valentine's Day with her partner instead of a lover. And it was more painful because she wanted her partner to be her lover and that was never gonna happen. It made her long for simpler days when things weren't so complicated. She knew there were lines you didn't cross in her profession and she had tried very hard to toe that line with Mulder. But every once in awhile she thought about the night they almost kissed. In fact she knew they would have kissed if not for that stupid bee that happened to sting her and almost kill her. Talk about a mood killer. But they were seconds away from locking lips and she certainly wasn't going to stop it. She wondered if he ever thought about that night. It was probably a mistake he regretted since he'd never tried again and never brought it up. And she was not about to bring it up. They had both been upset that night and the kiss was just something that seemed right at the time, but now looking at it, it probably seemed like a huge mistake that was averted. Mulder was probably relieved that the bee had stung her. Well, maybe not relieved since that was a huge mess. But he probably was glad he hadn't gone through with the kiss. But every so often she would fantasize about that night and how it could have ended if not for the bee. And it was a good fantasy. One that kept her warm on some of those lonely nights.
The rest of the day seemed to pass so slowly, but finally it was time to go home.
"I'll see you later, Mulder," she called out to him as she got her things in order to leave.
"I can't wait."
She just smiled at him and walked out the door. She was mentally trying to decide what to wear even if she knew this wasn't exactly a date. She wasn't going to get dressed up fancy to go sit on Mulder's couch and eat Chinese food. But she still wanted to look nice. But first she had to stop by the store and pick up a bottle of wine for later. She pulled up outside the grocery store and saw lots of men walking out with bouquets of flowers and balloons. She wished someone was getting her flowers. She couldn't even remember the last time someone had gotten her flowers. She hurried inside and grabbed the wine she wanted and absently she walked down the aisle with all of the Valentine's candy on it. She saw a big red heart shaped box of chocolates. She couldn't remember the last time anyone had given her chocolates either. She grabbed the box off the shelf and decided to get it. She'd give it to Mulder but it was more for herself. She wanted to eat the chocolate, but if she gave it to him, it'd seem less pathetic for her to buy it for herself. It wouldn't be like a real gift. Just something silly to offer him and nothing more. It's not like she expected him to get her a gift. She took her purchases and brought them up to the front register.
Mulder was excited for tonight. He hoped that everything went according to his plans and that there would be a great moment in which he could tell Scully how he really felt for her. He had no idea what this brilliant moment would be, but he hoped it naturally occurred. He was nervous but ready for it too. There was no sense drawing this out for any longer because she needed to know the truth. She needed to understand the truth and realize that when he said he loved her, that's what he really meant. Of course he had no idea where this would leave them. It was very possible she could think he was pathetic and he'd get the speech about how she loved him, but just not like that. And then he'd feel like an ass and wish he was dead. But for some reason, it still felt important to tell her. To show her. And whatever happened after that was out of his hands. He just hoped it led them to a good place and not an awkward place where he was wishing the ground would open up and swallow him.
He bustled around his apartment tossing things into closets, trying to make the place not seem as messy as it really was. Not that it really mattered. Scully knew he was a slob. She'd been over a million times and even had her own key. When he lit some candles, that's when he knew he was trying too hard. That was just too much. So he quickly blew them out and waved the smoke out of the air. He wanted this to be a special night without her realizing it was supposed to be special. So he finally decided to just sit down on the couch and wait for her. Acting naturally was the best course of action. He needed to pretend this was just like every other time she stopped by and hung out or they worked together long into the evening.
She finally got there around 7pm toting her bottle of wine and box of chocolates. She suddenly felt stupid for bringing those, but they were really for her to eat more than they were for him. He opened the door and smiled at her.
"I've got my Valentine's supplies," she said holding up her offerings. She handed him the chocolate. "Happy Valentine's Day."
"You know I have a sweet tooth," he grinned as he took the box and led her into the apartment.
She put her stuff down on the table and turned around and saw that Mulder had a single red rose in his hands.
"For you," he said handing it over.
"Thank you," she smiled.
"Yeah some guy was selling them on the corner and I couldn't resist."
She was surprised at his gesture. She had just been thinking no one ever got her flowers and he got her one. Just one, but beggars can't be choosers. It was still sweet.
"So should I order the food?" Mulder asked her.
She nodded her head. "I'm starving. I almost ate the box of chocolates on the way over."
"I'll put the call in then. Your usual?"
While he made the call she busied herself opening up the bottle of wine and finding a glass somewhere in Mulder's kitchen. She finally found one and poured herself a generous glass. For some reason she felt nervous in his presence tonight. She wasn't sure why. But she hoped a little alcohol would loosen her up a bit.
"They should be here in twenty minutes," he told her as he hung up the phone.
"You gonna have some wine with me?" she asked.
"I've got a beer." He pointed over to the coffee table.
He went over and sat down and put his feet up on the table. She followed him and took off her jacket and kicked off her shoes. Might as well get comfortable, she thought. She was wearing a black velvet top and black pants. The top was semi low cut and she questioned her choice once she sat down next to him and notice his eyes travel downward to her chest. She felt embarrassed and also proud. It was a weird combination. She was embarrassed to have him staring and proud that he wanted to stare at her like that. She decided to just go with it. That was the reason she'd worn it. Just to see if he'd notice.
His eyes quickly darted away from her chest and settled on the spot on the couch next to him. He hoped she hadn't realized he was staring at her low cut top. But he was a man, and she was Scully and he had needs that weren't being met. She should have known he would stare. Women had so much power over men. Just flash them a little boob and suddenly they were catatonic and trying not to drool all over themselves. He wondered if she realized just what it was she did to him. Maybe that's why she had worn that top? Or maybe she was blinded to how attractive she really was? Sometimes he couldn't tell if she knew that or not.
"So what movie did you get?" she asked, trying to break the awkward silence that settled over them.
"I got a really good one," he said excitedly holding up the package.
"Valentine's Day Bloodbath? You got a horror movie?"
"Yeah it's about some guy who dresses up like cupid and shoots people with real arrows and wrecks havoc on the town."
She sighed. "I thought maybe you'd get something more romantic and less bloody. It is Valentine's Day after all."
"What? This is a Valentine's movie. And I'm sure there's some sort of romance in it. Even if the lovers get killed," he explained. "Besides, I thought we were anti-Valentine's Day?"
"We are. I just was hoping to not see blood and guts while I'm eating my dinner."
"This coming from the woman who once told me she got hungry for pizza after looking at a dead guys stomach contents on the autopsy table."
"I couldn't help it! I hadn't eaten all day."
"Well I'm sure you can survive through my little movie. We can start it after dinner though if that's better for you."
"Yeah, I'll have more wine in me too and maybe drunk me will find your taste in movies more delightful," she smirked at him.
"You'll love it. Trust me," he assured her with a grin.
Scully was already on her second glass of wine when the food finally arrived. She was feeling more relaxed now. And she was hungry so she dug in quite heartily to their meal. Mulder did the same. And when they were finished they both sat back on the couch holding their stomachs.
"I think I ate too much," Scully said with a sigh.
"I think I did too."
"But it was so good. Thanks for dinner Mulder."
"No problem," he smiled at her. "Hey we forgot to open our fortune cookies."
He leaned forward and grabbed the cookies off the table. He handed one to her and he cracked open the one in his hand.
"What does it say," she asked him curiously.
"Live like you're dying for tomorrow is never promised," he read back to her.
"That's interesting. I guess it's a seize the day kind of sentiment. Makes sense."
"Yeah it makes a lot of sense actually," he said quietly, thinking about the reason he had her over at his house. All the things he wanted to say to her. And tomorrow was never promised so there was no better time than the present to get it all out in the open.
"What does your fortune say," he asked.
She cracked it open and looked at the paper. She flipped it over and back again.
"My fortune is blank. There's nothing on the paper," she said with a pout. "What does that mean?"
He took the paper out of her hands and examined it. He tossed it onto the table. "I think maybe it means your future is wide open for possibilities."
"Either that or I have no future. This is like going to a palm reader and having her tell you she sees nothing in your future and then you walk outside and get hit by a bus," she complained.
"No, stop, it doesn't mean that. Besides I didn't think you believed in palm readers."
"Well I don't really. But if I went to one and she saw no future I think I'd be worried."
"These are fortune cookies, not glimpses of our future anyway. They don't really mean anything. Yours was just a mix up at the fortune cookie plant."
"I guess so. I don't know why I'm letting it bother me. It's just a stupid cookie," she sighed. "I think I need more wine."
Mulder grabbed the bottle and poured her some more, while he got up and got himself another beer.
"I think it's movie time, Scully. Be prepared to be scared senseless. And remember you can always clutch onto me and hold my hand if you need to," he said with a smirk.
"I think I'll survive. We've seen way scarier things in real life, I'm sure."
"Sadly I'm sure that's true. But it'll still be a fun movie experience."
He came around to the TV and popped the movie into the VCR. Then he sat back down on the couch next to Scully. They watched the movie for a little while but Scully kept making 'pffft' sounds and rolling her eyes.
"That guy doesn't even look scary walking around in a big diaper," she mused.
"But he has devil horns," Mulder defended the character.
"But still, a diaper?" she scoffed. "And why did that cheerleader go into the locker room when she heard those screams. She should have run out and called the police."
"It's a movie, Scully. It wouldn't be any fun if the cheerleaders were smart."
"Yeah, but did she have to be topless when she was running away from him?"
"Yes, yes she did. That's part of the movie magic. She was changing her clothes after a long hard day of cheerleading."
"If you hear someone scream in the locker room and you go investigate, but find nothing, you're just gonna start stripping your clothes off? It was dark in there. Where were the lights? Didn't that seem odd to her?"
"Oh Scully…I love watching bad movies with you," he laughed.
"I can't help but make these observations. The people in horror movies are stupid. And I need more wine." She grabbed the bottle and poured herself another glass. There was no doubt she was starting to feel a little tipsy from all the alcohol.
Mulder noticed how much she was drinking and as much as it amused him, it kind of threw a wrench into the works for all his big plans. He couldn't pour his heart out to her if she was completely drunk. She might not even remember it in the morning. But a drunk Scully was something funny to behold. She talked a lot more and had no qualms ripping his movie to shreds. It made him smile.
"Oh here we go. Two people parked on Lover's Lane. That's gonna end well," Scully remarked with a giggle as she pointed at the screen.
"Sometimes that ends well," he pointed out.
"Do you speak from experience?"
"Yeah well one time it worked out well for me in high school."
"Just some girl named Jennifer. I thought I was gonna marry her. Of course, I was 16 at the time."
"Marry her? Oh Mulder…you used to be a romantic huh?"
"Hey, I still am, I'll have you know," he told her seriously. "I bought you a rose didn't I?"
She smiled at him. "That you did, Mulder. That you did."
"So what about you, Scully? Are you a romantic?"
"I used to think I was. But I don't know."
"I bet you are, you just keep it hidden well."
"I thought I was going to marry Marcus, the high school love of my life."
"You did? How come that didn't work out?"
"Oh I don't know. After school was over we just went our separate ways. Different colleges. It certainly wasn't meant to be. But for a moment, I envisioned it all with him."
"What about after him? You envision yourself and the white picket fence with anyone else?"
She took a long sip of her wine and looked at him. "Yes. There were others. One I thought seriously about being with, but it was complicated. It didn't work out. I just don't think the white picket fence dream is for me."
He wished he could offer her that, but he knew he couldn't. Not really. Their lives were so complicated and twisted up with work. But if he could see himself doing the whole white picket fence affair, he could imagine no one else but Scully by his side.
"Some people don't need a special fence to be happy," he told her seriously.
She grabbed the wine bottle and poured the remaining contents into her glass and shook the bottle to make sure she got it all. Then she put it back down on the table and took a gulp of her wine. She was definitely tipsy now.
"I used to get sad thinking about what I've given up and how I probably won't ever have the dream I used to dream. But I'm okay with it. I have other things. Things that at this moment, matter more to me. I don't need the fence."
Mulder scooted closer to her on the couch and touched her hand.
"What do you need, Scully?"
She looked at him and for the briefest moment the words 'I need you' hung on her lips. But she wasn't drunk enough to utter them. She had to keep that locked up. She straightened herself and shrugged at him.
"I don't know what I need." It was a lie she was good at telling by this point. "So tell me more about the old crushes you had and your own dreams. I wanna hear more," she said changing the subject.
"My old crushes? There's nothing to really tell. I used to assume I'd get married and have kids like everyone else. But there was never a time for that in my life. I did think maybe once I'd found someone in college. But she actually shot me down completely and said she just wanted to be my friend. Talk about being knocked back a peg or two."
"Ouch. The friend zone. That bites."
"It did. And once you're in the friend zone, I don't know if you can ever climb out of it," he lamented.
She took another sip of wine and sighed. "I don't know. It's possible. I mean, sometimes the best relationships are rooted in friendship. And maybe one day you wake up and see this person, this friend, and realize that you can't live without them. And suddenly everything shifts in your mind."
"Personal experience?" He was hoping she'd say yes and be talking about him.
She shrugged. "Maybe?" That was how it had been with her and Mulder. One day she just realized she couldn't imagine her life without him. It wasn't planned. It just happened. And now he was all she could think of. "Has that ever happened to you?"
He thought for a moment, already knowing his answer. He was just unsure if he should say it. She was getting towards drunk and the timing was all wrong. But he wanted to tell the truth.
"Maybe?" he said, mirroring her own answer.
Everything was left ambiguous, but one thing he noticed was that neither of them were watching the movie anymore. They were watching each other. And something very tense and thick was in the air between them. Mulder decided to break that moment and get another beer. If she was getting drunk, then maybe he should too.
"You want a beer, Scully? I noticed you finished your wine."
"Oh I think I'm good. Maybe. Oh what the hell, yeah, bring me a beer."
He came back with two beers and they clanked bottles before taking a swig.
"I think I'm a little drunk," she giggled.
"I think you're a lot drunk," he smirked.
"Well you only live once, right?"
"Are you drunk too?"
"Nah, I've only had a couple of beers. But you, my dear, are a lightweight who finished off a bottle of wine by herself."
"I offered to share."
"I know. But you're cute when you're drunk."
"I am?" she smiled at him.
"This is the best Valentine's Day I've had in awhile," she told him thoughtfully. "I got a rose and I'm drunk and I'm cute."
He laughed at her and shook his head.
"Is it hot in here or is it just me?" she asked clawing at her shirt. Her face was flushed from the alcohol.
"I think it's just you, Ms. Drunky Pants."
"I feel hot. Do you have a t-shirt I can put on? This velvet top feels like it's strangling me with heat."
"Yeah sure. Hang on."
He got up and went to his bedroom and brought her out a t-shirt to wear. He handed it over.
"Oh goodie. Thank you. I'm gonna go change. Plus I have to pee."
He watched her stumble over to his room and head for the bathroom. She came stumbling out a few minutes later wearing his shirt that was several sizes too large for her. She plopped down on the couch with him and put her feet into his lap.
"Now that feels better," she smiled drunkenly. "Now if I could just take my pants off I'd be golden."
"Scully are you trying to seduce me?" he asked with a smirk.
She smacked his arm. "Don't be silly. I'm just wanting to be comfortable, you pervert," she giggled.
"You can take your pants off if you want to. I won't mind." Please let her do that, his mind thought over and over again. But then he mentally slapped himself. She was drunk. He wouldn't take advantage of a drunk Scully even if she had no pants on.
"No I'll keep them on. I think you might like it too much if I took them off," she said with a raised eyebrow.
"I wouldn't complain, that's for sure."
"I'm comfortable enough now. You can rub my feet though. My shoes hurt them today."
He looked down at her feet in his lap and began to massage them. They were so tiny and his big hands worked their magic.
"This is like heaven," she murmured.
It felt like heaven to him too. This night hadn't gone quite as planned though. There were still three little words on the tip of his tongue he wanted to say to her. It just didn't seem like the right time to say them. He wanted to make sure she remembered them, but part of him just wanted to say it anyway.
"Yeah?" she muttered sleepily.
He sat there for a moment and just tried to gather the courage to say the words. But he took too long. He glanced over at her and her eyes were closed.
No response. She was out like a light. He shook her legs a little and got no response. Then he tickled her feet, thinking that would wake her up. But all that got him was her kicking her feet at him as she rolled over and snuggled down into the couch. It was no use. She was asleep. That's what too much wine will do to you. He sighed and lifted her feet off his lap and laid them onto the couch. Then he went and got her a blanket and tucked her in. He kissed the top of her head.
"Sweet dreams, my sweet Scully," he whispered. "I love you."
She stirred slightly and his heart leapt into his chest at the thought of her hearing what he said. But she just grabbed the blanket and pulled it up to her chin. He decided to switch off the movie which was almost over, and he picked up all the cartons of food and beer bottles and Scully's wine glass. Then he figured he might as well go to bed too. He was tired. He'd had a few beers and they were lulling him to sleep too, even if he was definitely not drunk like she was. He got undressed and slipped into his bed and turned the light off. He quickly fell into a dreamless sleep.
Scully was awoken when she had to pee again. At first she didn't know where she was. Everything seemed unfamiliar and then she realized she was on Mulder's couch. She looked around sleepily and noticed it was completely dark. He had gone to bed and left her out there. She pulled the blanket off of her and sat up. She just sat there for a minute thinking to herself. She couldn't exactly remember when she had fallen asleep. The last thing she remembered was Mulder massaging her feet. She must have passed out. That was not how she hoped the night would end. Not that she had a plan exactly, but she felt bad for falling asleep on him. She didn't even remember the movie they were supposed to be watching, but she knew it was pretty bad. She stood up and padded as silently as she could to his bathroom. She didn't want to wake him up. He was sleeping so peacefully that she smiled when she saw his form tangled in the sheets of his bed. She went into the bathroom and closed the door. She relieved herself and decided to ditch her pants. They were too tight and restricting. She left them crumpled on the bathroom floor along with her top she had discarded earlier.
She no longer felt drunk. In fact she felt wide awake. She decided to walk over to where Mulder was sleeping and see if he'd wake up. Just her luck, he was already awake. He had heard her go into the bathroom and it had opened his eyes. He was waiting there in the dark for her to come back out.
"You asleep?" she whispered softly.
"I didn't mean to wake you up," she apologized.
"It's not a problem."
He looked at her in the darkness and saw her pants were now gone. She was just wearing his t-shirt and nothing else.
"Your bed looks more comfortable than the couch," she whispered softly.
He sat up. "You want me to take the couch? I don't mind."
"No that's okay. Maybe I could just sleep here with you?" She couldn't believe she had actually spoken those words out loud, but she had.
Mulder was a little dumbfounded at her offer.
"Are you still drunk?"
"No. I-I just thought maybe it'd be okay. We're adults. We can share a bed, right?"
Mulder thought for a moment, then patted the empty space next to him.
"Climb on in, Scully."
She did as instructed and they both just laid there on their backs staring at the ceiling. Neither one of them said a word. There was a safe distance between them and Scully figured they could just keep it that way and it'd be fine. But just then she felt Mulder's hand reach out and take hold of hers. So they lay there in the dark holding hands while staring at the ceiling. Neither one of them knew what to say. Words weren't really necessary though. Something was shifting between them and they both could feel it. Mulder picked her hand up and kissed it. Then he leaned over and kissed Scully's cheek, ever so softly. He began trailing small kisses down the side of her face until she turned her head and his lips brushed against hers. He didn't really know what he was doing except having Scully in his bed was more than he could handle. He was weak and just decided to go for it. He kissed her lips gently and whisper soft, barely touching them with his own. Maybe he was just gauging how she'd react. But she just laid there still and didn't make a sound. He decided to be more forceful and press his lips against her harder, pulling her towards him. Then he pulled back and waited for her reaction.
"I knew I couldn't trust you to be good with me in your bed," she whispered with a smile.
He laughed slightly and buried his face in his hands. "I'm sorry, Scully. I'll be good. Promise."
He scooted away from her, feeling defeated, but she grabbed his arm.
"Maybe I don't want you to be good?"
He was taken off guard at her admission.
"Maybe I don't want you to be good, Mulder. Maybe I'm tired of this aching void inside me where you are supposed to be?"
He rolled over to face her. He put his hand on her cheek and held it there.
"What are you saying?"
"I'm just saying that I'm tired of it all. Tired of feeling lonely when you're right next to me. I'm tired of pretending. Aren't you tired of pretending?" She had no idea what had gotten into her and she didn't think she could blame it on the wine she didn't feel anymore. But something inside of her had just snapped and was tired of all the pretense and the hiding and biting back feelings when she knew she wasn't the only one. There may have been rules in place forbidding her from being with Mulder, but right now the rebel in her was saying 'Fuck the rules!'
"I am tired of pretending. God, you have no idea how tired I am of that," he told her with relief in his voice.
He leaned over and kissed her again, this time more passionately than before.
"I've tried to keep it all bottled up, but I can't anymore," he told her between kisses.
"Me too. I've tried. But I'm miserable, Mulder."
"I'm miserable too."
"Let's not be miserable anymore."
He kissed her again and ran his hands over her body. He could feel her tugging at his t-shirt and he let her bring it over his head.
"It's always been you, Scully. From the moment we met. It's always been you. I love you."
"I love you too," she whispered.
Their hands roamed each others bodies and things got very heated, very fast. It was a moment they'd both been waiting so long for that they couldn't believe it had actually arrived. They'd taken their sweet time to get here and now the moment was perfect. Soon they were nothing but a tangled mess of limbs and lips and tongues and hands grabbing at each other. When the moment was over, they both lay there together, breathing heavily.
"I can't feel my legs," Scully said with a grin.
"Damn I'm good," Mulder remarked with his own grin.
She laughed and just stared at the ceiling.
"Did this really just happen?" she asked.
"I believe it did."
Six whole years they'd waited for this moment and it didn't disappoint. Scully had no idea what had come over her tonight, but she was damn glad it did. She was so sick of hiding her feelings, especially when she knew Mulder felt the same. They were always dancing around it. His flirtations, their stolen glances, the soft kisses on the cheek, the holding of hands. It was all there just waiting to be explored. And neither of them were quite sure anymore why they waited so long.
Mulder wrapped his arms around her and pulled her close. He kissed her.
"I love you, Scully."
"I love you too."
"Do you believe me this time?" he asked.
"What do you mean?"
"The first time I told you I loved you, you didn't believe me."
She thought for a moment. "Oh you mean at the hospital?"
"Mulder I thought you were just being silly. How many times have you asked me to marry you or said we should be picking out china patterns? I figured you were joking. Plus you were drugged up."
"Well I was serious. I love you. I loved you then, and I love you now."
"I believe you."
"You're the other half of me. The part that makes me whole. I'm nothing without you, Scully. You know that. You're my soul mate."
She smiled and kissed him.
"I feel the same way. And I want you to know that I don't regret a single second of my choices because they led me here to you."
"I don't have a white picket fence."
"I don't need one."
And she meant that. Her dreams had changed now. They weren't the same as they used to be. And even if Mulder couldn't offer her the sort of life she used to dream, he offered her something even better. Unconditional love and devotion. They were devoted to each other in ways that not many other people could ever understand. They'd do anything for each other. And that was something more precious than any fence or so-called normal life. They weren't ordinary people, so their lives would never be ordinary. But Scully just thought of their lives as being extraordinary instead. They had each other. And that was the only thing either of them ever needed for the rest of their lives.
I don't want to rush this cause my greatest fear
is taking for granted what's taken us years
To build from the ground up with all of the tears that we cried
We've taken our time and for this I'm so glad
Now we can be sure that this moment will last
We've traveled a road of mistakes in our past to get here
And I'm not about to throw words to the wind
When I said "I love you" that's what I meant
And I'm going to show you if it takes me the rest of my life….Blessid Union of Souls
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