Summary: Max finds a rival for Alec's heart in the most unexpected source.

A/N: I know this seems a little… or a lot… like Logan-bashing. And it is. But the whole story is intended to be something of a parody, so expect exaggeration of all the characters' more prominent traits – and don't take offence from any of it. It's just for fun… I love 'em all.

A/A/N: Title credit goes to Brandy and Monica's song of the same name.

Timeline: Sometime after "Hello, Goodbye" but before "Freak Nation".

The Boy is Mine

- Epiphany -

Logan stared at the computer screen, rapt in his admiration of the vision before him.

A picture, similar to but slightly variant from the hundreds – no, thousands – of others contained within his hard-drive… and on backup, in triplicate, on c.d.'s and disks. Mini, zip, and even some old-fashioned floppies thrown in for good measure. All under lock and key and within the protective confines of three different safe deposits at three of the most secure facilities in all of Seattle. If the unthinkable happened and his computer system crashed, at least those copies would be salvaged.

No printouts… couldn't have those lying around, in case anyone were to stumble upon them. There was no shortage of individuals loafing about his apartment these days, and most of them had their wandering eyes and lack of comprehension of the term "privacy".

So he reserved his viewing for when he was alone, for when he could pop open a few dozen windows on his computer and just stare and stare and stare… for hours, until the next uninvited visitor dropped by. Of course, sometimes that visitor was the object of his admiration, and those stopovers were quite welcomed, and long awaited. Not that he could ever do more than just look. No, touch was out of the question, at least for now. But soon enough… soon enough…

Because Logan had a plan. And like all of Logan's plans, this one was quite brilliant, if he didn't say so himself.

Or was that if he did say so himself? How did that old phrase go…

Whatever. It was brilliant. For Logan Cale was brilliant, and thus anything that was conceived of his mind must too, by default, be brilliant. It was the kind of plan that made him cackle in glee… though his cackle sounded more like a girlish giggle. But it was quite gleeful, and that was good.

Running a finger over the surface of the picture, he reveled in the perfection that was the creature before him – and immediately cursed himself for leaving a greasy smudge of a fingerprint on his screen – but what did he expect? Manticore had made them all that way. Still, the fact that the beauty was genetically engineered did nothing to detract from its impact. Actually, it made it all the more appealing… and made him wonder just how far that perfection extended…

He let out a wistful sigh and, glancing at the clock, closed up all the windows and the secret password-encrypted folder in which they were contained – arranged in chronological order, cross-referenced by various keywords relating to lighting, facial expressions, amount of skin showing, etc.

Logan rubbed his chin thoughtfully and, upon nicking his finger on his stubble, decided it was time for a shave. Maybe a shower too, and change of clothes, plus a haircut before he set off to put his brilliant plan into motion.

After all, if he wanted to win Alec away from Max, he was going to have to look his best.

- to be continued -