This is a project I had to do, and post online.
This fanfiction is basically me interviewing Holmes about his thoughts on a biography written about him by Nick Rennison.
Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock Holmes (He belongs to Sir Arthur Conan Doyle), Nick Rennison (He belongs to Nick Rennison), or his book "Sherlock Holmes: The Unauthorized Biography." (That belongs to Nick Rennison too.)
"Good evening Mr. Holmes."
"Good evening ma'am."
"Would you mind if I were to ask you some simple questions regarding Nick Rennison's unauthorized biography about you?"
"Yes, I would mind."
"Let's start with your thoughts on the author himself. Do you believe him to be as good as your personal Boswell, Dr. Watson?"
"I am indifferent."
"Do you mind that he wrote about you, without consulting you first?"
"During the past century, many authors have decided to write fictional stories about me. One grows used to this rather irksome fact."
"Do you think Rennison stuck closely to the facts of your life?"
"Regarding some circumstances, he guessed closely. Other events are completely fictional, meant to excite the minds of fans, and to encourage them in their own writing."
"Can you give us some examples of a few fictional events?"
"Well, to start, after I escaped Professor Moriarty's wrath at the Reichenbach Falls, I did not play secret agent for my brother Mycroft in Tibet, Persia, and the Sudan as Mr. Rennison claims."
"So what did you do during the Great Hiatus, when you disappeared for so long a time?"
"I did just as I explained to Watson. I believe it is recorded in the story he has named 'The Final Problem.'"
"Could you recap for us?"
"I'd rather not."
"Very well; do you agree with any of the guesses Rennison made?"
"His explanation concerning me and Miss Irene Adler is very accurate."
"What did he write again?"
"I believe he wrote, "Probably more nonsense has been written about Holmes's relationship with Irene Adler than any other part of his life.""
"I noticed you emphasized 'nonsense' there. Care to explain?"
"Nonsense is correct. I agree with Mr. Rennison as to the fact that it is a nuisance that fans have written stories and books claiming that me and Miss Adler ran off and had children. Or we secretly got married, nonsense like that."
"So what is your real relationship with Irene Adler?"
"I respect her intelligence and wit. She is higher than many women in that field. That's all."
"Alright, moving on to a new topic…Rennison writes "At the time of his death, Holmes was, paradoxically, both a forgotten man and one of the most famous people in the world." Any thoughts?"
"It is true that most of the people who actually knew me have passed on. And, although my name is known throughout the world, the real me has been forgotten, and replaced by the fictional Holmes that Watson created. "The Sherlock Holmes that Watson created has triumphed over the real Sherlock Holmes." This is a statement I agree with."
"So you're saying that it's Dr. Watson's fault that you find yourself in that strange paradox?"
"I have no right to blame my Boswell. Watson is a man who craves a hero, someone to look up to. Apparently, he chose me. His writings are simply what I'm like through his eyes."
"Have you ever expressed this to Watson?"
"I believe we are moving off subject."
"Right…well, moving back on then. Rennison also writes later in the book, "Unable to feel emotions in quite the same way that most people do, Holmes acted them out in order to understand them more fully." Your opinion?"
"It is true, I have never loved, and I am indifferent over many things that some would cry over. I suppose I could be described as what people in the modern world say: an emotional outsider. It is also true that I was able to experience the emotions that were so foreign to me when I acted them out. As I have explained to Watson, in order to act out a role well, one must become the role."
"And what was your reaction to experiencing said emotions?"
"During my short time as an actor, I was told many times that one must let go of their character in order to stay sane after a performance. This could never be, however, when dealing with those odd emotions that overtook me while playing those roles. It felt queer, feeling love, fear, so suddenly, and then being asked to leave it behind. But once I was able to, I felt free again. Love is such a burden to mankind."
"Many would disagree with you."
"Many already have."
"Well, the next question. In the very last chapter, Rennison wrote, "On the last day, [Dr.] Huxtable injected Holmes with morphine, as he had done on several previous occasions, and he remembered his patient's ironic smile and a remark that the doctor did not, at the time, understand. "He whispered, "My friend Watson would not approve" – his voice was very faint in those last few days, but I clearly heard that – and then he said something like, "the greatest mystery for last."" This happened in your deathbed, did it not? And, what did you mean by, "the greatest mystery for last."?"
"Well, first off, obviously, I'm still alive-"
"This makes absolutely no sense, since you're probably about 158 years old, and still looking thirty."
"That is a story for another time. Anyways, I was never on my deathbed, so this scene is completely fictional. Which means what I said would also have been fictional. The quote you have presented is yet another attempt to keep the fans guessing, and to fuel their imagination."
"You seem to have something against fiction."
"It's unhelpful. It fills the brain, and leaves no room for reality. It causes men to question real facts. It-"
"Alright Mr. Holmes, I get the point!"
"Are we almost finished here?"
"We only have a few more questions. So, over all, what is your opinion about Nick Rennison's "Sherlock Holmes: the Unauthorized Biography?""
"His version of my life is rather interesting. It's not correct, but interesting. He stuck closely to the world's facts, but not so closely to my life's facts. It was a good attempt, I'll give him that. It ran smoothly, and many of his predictions about me I agree with. I was extremely annoyed, however, about his chapter regarding my 'love life.' To think that I-!"
"And that leads me on to my final question."
"What would that be?"
"It is the question that many, many, many fans would love to have the answer to."
"Oh no…please don't-"
"What is your relationship with John Watson?"
"Wait…Mr. Holmes, where are you going? Please, answer the question! No, don't go!"
Constructive feedback and reviews ALWAYS welcome!