22 reasons why YOU should join the Dark Side! (AKA Vespers)
1. We have cookies. And last time I checked, there was hot chocolate too!
Ben smiled at his sister, Cindy. They had just, robbed three million dollars and escaped the cops.
"Police are sooo stupid these days." Cindy smiled and rolled her eyes. Suddenly, a dark figure appeared in front of them. A deep, black cloak he wore and a hood that created shadows across his face. On the back, there was a bloody red letter V sewed on it.
"I know I know, Vesper. So, what do you have?" Ben cut right to the chase. The man removed a plastic bag from his pocket. He held it up. The moonlight lit of the bag that held... CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES!
"OHMYVESPER! YOU HAVE COOKIES!" Cindy squealed with joy and acted like a five year old, either though she was 17.
"We. Are. IN!" Ben smiled and took the bag. Then shook the Vesper's hand.
"Welcome to the Dark Side."
2. Meet the recruitment bunny!
"Hello new Vespers! I'm Bugs Bunny! The Recruitment Bunny! HARDY HAR HAR!" The guy in the pink bunny suit laughed like an idiot.
"Oh god, Ben..." Cindy whispered.
3. You get a cool dark cape that covers your whole body.
A man entered and handed Ben and Cindy a cape.
Ben wore it and swept out the room, his new cape flowing behind him in a dramatic way. Cindy wrapped the cape around her body, the way Dracula does it. Being bad was awesome.
"No fair! They got upgraded to capes already." huffed a 20 year old woman as Cindy and Ben brushed past her in the hall, their capes bellowing behind them.
4. You get a really cool crazy laugh. Now, practice with me people: MWAHAHA HAHA cough cough.
"Noo! Please, don't!" a woman (Cahill) pleaded as Ben hung her over the edge of a really tall building.
"Pathetic Cahill. MWAHAHAH HAHA HAHA HAHA!" Ben gave a maniac evil laugh. Cindy joined in.
"MWAHAHA HAHA HAHA HAH- cough cough. Ugh, WATER!" Cindy coughed as her laugh turned into a coughing fit.
Ben just continued laughing like Voldemort, except Ben's awesomeness kills Baldyfart awesome any day, anyway.
5. You get to walk out of the shadows mysteriously and freak out the good guys.
"Be prepared." Amy whispered to Dan as they entered the Vesper stronghold in America. "They can pop up AH!"
Ben walked out of the corner of the wall, out of a shadow.
"OH MY GOSH!" Dan screamed, as Cindy walked out of another shadow.
"Welcome Cahills to our humble... base." Ben said.
"But sadly, you cannot enjoy a lovely stay, Cahill." Cindy finished with a flourish of her cape. Dan and Amy's eyes were still wide open in shock and fear. They were freaked out on how they just walked out of the shadows.
"SHADOW WALKING IS MY THING!" Nico Di Angelo shouted angrily, walking out of another shadow.
6. One word. : UNDERLINGS! Someone to get things for you when you're too lazy to do them yourself. Now that's the life...
Ben sat, sprawled on the cough eating a bag of 'Fattie McBaggie Chips!' watching Adventure Time on Cartoonetwork.
"YO! UNDERLING!" Ben shouted. A whimpering girl quickly walked into the room. "Get me some cookies and hot chocolate." Ben ordered.
"You're going to get fat." Cindy said, up-side down on the chair.
"Underling, now." Ben pointed to the door. The girl nodded and quickly walked out the door. Five minutes later, she came back with a tray of hot chocolate and cookies.
"WHERE IS MY HOT CHOCOLATE!?" Cindy screamed and threw cookies at the girl.
"Eeek! I'm so sorry Ms. Cindy." The girl whimpered and ran out to get another hot chocolate.
"Mm. Underling's. A bad guy's quirk." Ben smiled and sipped his hot chocolate. "OUTH! I BUNT MY TONGUE!"
7. Money, Money, Money : Ever notice that we are usually much richer than the good guys?
"Woo Hoo!" Ben cheered as he rolled around on the money that covered the floor. Cindy held up a sack full of money smiling.
"We're rich." she said.
"Since when were bad guys not rich?" Ben asked.
"True. Being evil rules!" Cindy sighed.
8. WORLD DOMINATION! And the dark side is sooo much better than the good.
Vesper 1 sat in the black leather chair in front of a computer. Cindy and Ben were peering over his shoulder. They watched the captured Cahill's be miserable. Ok, really Cindy and Vesper 1 were watching while Ben was writing 100 ways on how to rule the world.
"Step one to World Domination... Capture hostages..." Ben said slowly as he wrote it down on the paper.
"Correct, Vespers will gain WORLD DOMINATION!" Vesper 1 said.
"Like it isn't every bad guys plan." Cindy muttered then Vesper 1 glared at her.
"I mean, 'Tee Hee Hee. We'll rule!'" Cindy said quickly.
9. You get to wear a white lab coat. (oh la la!)
Cindy walked into the science lab with a white lab coat on, looking very stylish. Ben scolded though, wearing his black cape dramatically.
"What happen to your cape?" he asked.
"Casper stole it." Cindy said. "But this lab coat is so much cooler. I mean, oh la la!"
"Nerd." Ben coughed. Cheyenne walked by and looked at them.
"Cool lab coat." she said to Cindy.
"I'm am freakin tired of those capes! Casper keeps acting like Batman!" Cheyenne shouted at Ben then stormed away.
"HaHa." Cindy grinned at Ben.
Ben frowned then scowled.
10. You can access our stock of evil weapons. (aka a blender and toaster)
"Ok, Vesper 1, we're ready to use the weapons." Ben said. Vesper 1 nodded at a guard.
The guard escorted Ben and cindy to the secret weapon room. They passed laser guns, taser, poisons, etc...
"So cool! What's the ultimate weapon?" Ben asked. The guard opened a hidden curtain and there, on the silver table was...
A toaster and blender.
"Oh my Vesper! So EVIL!" Cindy gasped.
"I know right?" the guard said.
11. You get to wear tall black boots and a shiny belt. (But NO SUSPENDERS! We're not fireman or people whose pants fall down.)
Cindy entered the conference room in tall black boots and the new shiny belt. She got an upgrade. Vesper 1 nodded in approval as Cindy sat down. Ben entered in suspenders.
"NO SUSPENDERS!" Vesper 1 shouted. "HE IS SHUNNED!"
Everybody turned their backs to Ben.
"Read the contract." Cindy murmured to him. He scanned over the contract.
Suspenders are NOT allowed. Doing so may get you killed. i said maaybee...
"Aw crap, Oops." Ben said and went out to change.
12. You get to wear creepy mask.
"Shh." Hamilton put his finger to his lips as the Holts tip-toed across the room. The lights flickered on and they were surrounded... by people with creepy mask.
"DIE!" The creepers talked liked that.
"HOLTS LET BOLT!" Hamilton screamed at Madison and Reagan as they plowed their way out of the building. Ben pulled his mask off and closed his eyes.
"These mask are so creepy." Ben said.
"I scare myself." Cindy said and struck a ridiculous pose.
"Ahh!" a Vesper screamed, terrified.
13. Key word; POWER! You get lots of it.
Ben stood at the balcony, lightning crackled in the sky.
"Bow down to me or suffer the consequences!" ben bellowed. All those people (Cahills) bowed down obediently, to their POWERful leader. Ben smirked and Cindy turned off the illusion room. The balcony and people disappeared until Ben was just standing in a green room with a window.
"POWER! Ben, you smirk sucks. You need to be more POWERful!" Cindy yelled at him.
"Like what? The POWERpuff girls?" Ben retorted.
14. All the black capes have cool inside pockets to hold my secret bunny collection. Did i just say that out loud? O.o
Ben spread his cape out and smiled. All the secret pockets held bombs, poisons and all those other weapons.
"CASPER GIVE IT BACK! IT HAS MY SECRET BUNNY COLLECTION!" Cindy screamed outside his room. "OH VESPER! Did I just say that out loud?"
"Yes, yes you did. And now it's mine. MWAHAHA HA!" Casper's footsteps echoed in the hall. Out of this conversation, Ben had two thought.
Cindy uses the secret pockets for a hidden bunny collection? Since when did Casper like bunnies?!
15. We get a vacation unlike the Jedi's (I don't watch/like star wars. -_- Mrrp...)
Ben sighed in relief as he sank into the hot tub. Cindy was riding around on her new tricycle.
"We get vacations like no others." Ben smiled then took a taco from the floating taco boat. A commercial appeared on the TV.
"Buy Oh's Microwaveable Burritos today!" said an over-perky lady.
16. We can do dangerous things like sky diving or eating chili or sunbathing (though it is hard to sunbathe when you are wearing black)
"READY?" Cindy screamed over the rushing air.
"GO!" Ben shouted then jumped out the plane with Cindy. WEEE! SKY DIVING IS SOOO DANGEROUS! Exscpicially when you're gong into a volcano..
Ben scooped mouthfuls of Ghost Pepper Chilli.
"Stop! That's dangerous!" Cindy said, referring to the waiver he had to sign to eat the chilli.
"No worries, I'm a Vesper. Bad guys do danger- OH MY FLIPPING GODS! HELP!" Ben screamed as his tongue erupted in flames. Literally.
Cindy stretched out on the beach chair, trying to sun bathe.
"Ugh, it's so hard to do it in black." Cindy whimpered in her black cape she took back from Casper and a black bikini.
17. We get to order our minions around.
"CHARLES! GO AND CAPTURE..." Ben scanned the list. "Kristi and Jacob Lane."
"Are you sure master?" asked Charles the butler/minion. He had an uneasy expression on his face. The Lanes were just like Cahill Vespers. Could they possibly be worse..?
"Do it." Ben growled.
Ok." Charles bowed stiffly and went to capture the Lanes.
An hour later, Charles came back, naked and limping with scars and cuts everywhere on his wrinkled body.
"We'll try again later." Cindy sighed as if this happened 39 times already. Ben was shouting in some colorful language at the whimpering man.
"THIS IS WHY WE HAVE MINIONS! WHAT'S THE POINT IF THEY CAN'T DO ANYTHING YOU-"
18. When no one is looking, we have funny faces contests.
"You have one minute to discuss a plan to over throw us." Ben ordered to the frightened Cahills. "Begin."
All the Cahills turned around, not paying attention to the Vespers. Ben made a goofy face face, then Cindy attempted a face between a snort/sneeze/cough/hiccup/constipated face. But of course, Casper had won by doing the Kirby dance. Cheyenne gave him a thumbs up and the Vespers did a five second Kirby dance.
19. We love to mix stuff in the blenders and dare each other to drink it.
Vesper 1, blind folded sat waiting for Cindy to finish blending. She added, Ben's boogers, Casper's fingernails, some sort of poison, rotten cheese, rotten eggs and chocolate chip cookies. The blender whizzed and she poured it into a goblet. Ben unblinded Vesper 1.
"I dare you to drink this." Cindy said. Vesper 1 glared at her harshly then took a sip.
"UGH!" Vesper gagged then drained the rest of it. He choked and ran to the bathroom to puke.
"Now I dare... Casper." Ben said.
"I do Cheyenne." Casper called.
"I'm killing Bugs Bunny." Cheyenne whispered to everybody . The 'recruitment' bunny was eating a carrot in the most creepy way possible.
So, everybody puked something up and Bugs Bunny is twitching in the hospital.
20. Sometimes, we hijack the tv studios and make our own commercials.
All the TV guards were knocked out and everybody that had something to do with a TV studio. Ben walked up to the camera.
"THREE! TWO! _ _ _" Cindy said.
"Hello! Buy our lovely product of, NINJA ROBOT DUCKS!" Ben said cheerfully into the camera. Casper played a clip of the robot ducks.
"Protect you from enemies! Frenemies! Cats! Dogs! POTATOES AND LAMPS!" Ben said. His voice was just there as it showed on the TV screen the ninja robot ducks beating things up.
"Just call 1-800- NIN-DUCKS!" Vesper 1 yelled. Soon, every phone was ringing for the product.
"Hello. You would like to buy a inja robot duck?" Cheyenne said into the phone.
"YES! TWO PLEASE! One for Dan Cahill and Hamilton Holt! The address is..."
It's also a way to get your enemies AKA the Good guys AKA the Cahills.
21. HOT BAD GUYS!
There are two types. 1) Hot, sexy, handsome or beautiful bad guys. Or 2) Hot bad guys cause their pants are smoking from the flames on them.
1) On the issue of Vesper Weekly, Ben Jackel was on the cover, grinning like a supreme dweeb. His black hair covered his winter-cold gray eyes. Over-all, every girl was now fawning over him. But also, this picture was in the magazine, Hottest people of the year.
The Jackels were in the Top 5 with the Kabra's and the hideous Justin Bieber.
"I'm look so much better then those gits!" Ian shouted at the photographer.
"I want to sue them Ian!." Natalie exclaimed.
"I want to sue you!" Cindy screamed at the 13 year old. Wait, wasn't she a hostage? Nevermind that.
"I'm hotter then you! Check out my ninja abs." Ben scolded.
"BABY BABY BABY OH! LIKE BABY BABY BABY NOO-"
"SHUT THE FLUFF UP!" everybody screamed at Justin.
22. You get to act stupid any time and people are to afraid to laugh at you.
Vesper 1 walked down the hall in a glittery pink dress. Ben and Cindy giggled but stopped at Vesper 1's glare of death.
Ben tripped on the curb and took a face plant in mad. He stood up and glowered at any Cahill who dared laughed at his muddy, yet handsome, face. no one laughed.
Cindy played with her secret bunny collection but all the Cahill agents walked in.
"Laugh and you die right here." Cindy said, her voice dipped in venom. Everybody ran out as fast as they could, frightened and not laughing at all.
And if this doesn't convince you to join us, The Vespers,...
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU ARE MISSING!
IT'S A ONCE IN A LIFE TIME OPPERTUNEITY TO THOSE WHO ARE EXTREMELY EVIL!
Join us soon.
We're waiting for you.
Enjoy it! Review it! Favorite it!
This list was not made by me, it was made by Madrigal-in-training who let me use her list that was on her profile.
Here's the Disclaimer: I do not own the 39 Clues, burritos (While spelling this I accidentally spelt 'butt') tacos, cookies, The Dark Side, Star wars, or Percy Jackson.
Was this a cross over? NO! Just random Nico Di Angelo that popped in!
Ben Jackel and Cindy Jackel are sibling's. Creamy colored skin, jet black hair and winter like gray eyes. Ben is 18 and Cindy is 17. They are soo immature. :P
We're waiting for you... (PS. I have reasons to make Vesper 1 like this is because he's my big brother. TEE HEE HEE!)
khbr23hw- logged off.