Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, the lovely J K Rowling does. And no, I do not make any money off of this. This is solely for my entertainment.

Summary: The Dursleys leave Harry during a family vacation to the Americas when Harry is very young. With no knowledge of who he is, where he lives, or even his name. He is found by a magical family with...issues and they decide to take him. However, when they realize WHO he is, they have to make some … changes. The WW is in for a shock!

WARNINGS: If you don't read this, then you can't complain :P lol Reference of child abuse/neglect. Unofficial kidnapping I guess, technically. But since the Dursleys don't care, is it really considered kidnapping? XD lol (Note: I don't condone kidnapping, but this is a fanfic and no children are harmed in the making... actually, it saves one.) Death of an OC... Cross-dressing. Oh! Main pairing is HP/LV (which means this is slash/gay/yaoi or however else you wish to phrase it) Thank you!

A/N: Saturday's story for my "Octoberfest." What's my Octoberfest you ask? Well, I plan on posting something EVERY DAY in month of October (except Sundays, but I probably will post that day too XD lol) I have 6 stories I'm updating weekly this month so... Expect this story to be updated every Saturday this month! ~

Dude Looks Like a Lady

Chapter One: Left Behind

Word Count: 2266

"I will NOT go back!" A raven haired woman yelled as she wrapped herself around the lamp post the couple had been passing.

"Zemirea, love, you have been hiding out in this country for four years. It's time you come home." The man tried to talk to the woman while he attempted to gently pry her away from the metal post.

"I said NO, Rynell! I will not… I can not…" Zemirea's emerald eyes welled up with tears as her voice started to crack. "I can not bear the shame of having lost a child." She whispered as she hid her face as best she could against the pole.

"Love, you need to come to terms with what happened." Rynell sighed as he ran a hand through his brunette hair, which effectively messed up his stately coiffure. "You're not the only one who has been hurting." His eyes softened as he placed a hand on the woman's shoulder.

Rynell's blue eyes sparkled like crystal as he looked at his lovely wife, who had wrapped herself around the pole as if it were a lover. Granted, if they were alone in their home he would find the display quite… enticing. However, no matter how low on the power scale their family was, they were purebloods and as such were expected to show some decorum while in public.

"Love… you look like a pole dancer."

Within a flash the woman had disentangled herself from the lamp post and stood a good yard away, smoothing out her lavender robes as if nothing had happened. Though the rose color tinting her cheeks told a story all its own.

"Now Zemirea, we cannot just stay in the Colonies…"

"Watch me." The woman cut in as she glared daggers at the man. "And they are not Colonies. America gained their independence ages ago." She stated plainly as she stuck her nose in the air.

"Yes, of course." Rynell stated, his hands in the air in a placating gesture. "But Zemi, we need to return to Britain."

"Why should I? I'm quite happy here."

"Because you are my wife." Rynell sighed. "Unless, of course, you no longer wish to be…" He trailed off, looking quite forlorn.

"Of course I want to be your wife!" The woman cried and hugged the man. "It's just… I was unable to provide you a child." She whispered brokenheartedly into his shoulder.

"Hush now." He said in a soothing voice. "We can talk about it, if that will make you feel better. But let's do it together."

Several minutes passed as they just held each other before the woman started laughing lightly.

"We have not been acting like proper Purebloods today, have we?" She asked as she gave him a teary smile.

"Americans are much more lax than the society we are used to." Rynell shot back with a smile.

"Hence why I have been staying here… they would not judge me for being unable to bear a child." Zemi stated sadly as she pulled away from her husband's arms, though she did not move from him.

"Pureblood society is harsh, yes, but we have lived with it all our lives. True, neither of us are high up on the social ladder but…" He trailed off and shook his head. "Besides, maybe your body is just not ready to produce a child. You cannot be certain that you are barren. At any rate, perhaps the other Purebloods will not care to pay attention to our woes."

"Surely you jest. They are going to be all over this! When I return without a child… This is going to be horrible. Are you certain we cannot move here permanently?" She asked, her eyes pleading.

"My job is in Britain. I cannot abandon the business my family has put so much effort into for generations."

"I suppose you are right, Ry. I just wish…"

The sound of a child's laughter rang through the otherwise empty street and the couple looked at one another.

"Honestly, who in their right mind would have a child out this late? And in this area… do they not realize this town houses a vampire clan?" Zemi shook her head, though Rynell could see the worry in her gaze.

"I did not know that… then again, you have been here quite a bit longer than I. Perhaps they are from out of town as well? Let us go warn them of the dangers." Rynell offered his hand to the beautiful woman and she took it with a smile, both grateful for the distraction.

A lovely raven haired child walked around aimlessly in the large town. The child's big emerald eyes looked around excitedly, an expression of awe on their adorable young face.

"So pwetty!" The child giggled as he happily continued to check out all the sights, not one bit put off by the fact it was night time.

The little one's family had left him alone near the clock tower several hours ago. Even though the child's Aunt and Uncle told him not to try and find the family, after a couple of hours he just couldn't stay still. A kid will be a kid, after all, and the town was too lovely for the little guy to pass up!

Besides, the sun had gone down and the town lit up so pretty!

Though the little boy hadn't a clue where his family went, he didn't much care really. They weren't very nice and the place they lived was horrible! He should know, he was the one that cleaned and kept the place nice most of the time.

This place was so much better! All the lights and sights here were mesmerizing and the child wanted nothing more than to stay there always. It was like a town from one's dreams or something. A magical place where people cared about little freaks and didn't mind if a child was… odd.

'Right, there's no such thing as magic.' The boy sighed as they remembered what his Uncle always yelled whenever he said the "M" word… and the punishment that usually followed.

"Hey there little one. Aren't you just the cutest thing." A woman called from behind the child.

'Ah, there must be another kid here too. She can't be talking about me.' No… with the overly large clothes, which looked more like a dress than the shirt it actually was, and the big scar that adorned the small child's forehead… 'Yeah, she can't be talking about me. But maybe the other kid will wanna play…No, no one wants to play with a freak.' The child thought sadly.

"Are you alright, Sweetie? You're not a mute, are you?" The woman's voice sounded concerned and it was like…

'Is she right next to me?' The green eyed child wondered and looked over his shoulder in shock.

Sure enough, the nice lady was standing right beside them. But as he looked around he realized that there were no other children around, which meant…

'She's talkin' to me!' The green eyed boy thought in wonder and smiled brightly at the woman. "No Ma'm, I jus' didn' know you wer talkin' to me…" He stated happily. 'Wow, I've never seen hair the color of moonlight before…'

The woman really was something! She had silver hair down to her waist, and it was very pretty. He had never seen hair that color on a young woman before. And the woman's eyes…

"Did you huwt yow eyes?" The boy inquired.

"Huh? No, why do you ask?" The woman inquired, clearly confused by the child's question.

"Cuz they awe da color of blood."

The eyes in question widened at the statement.

"How… what… How can you tell that? Kids aren't supposed to be able to… What the hell are you?" The woman growled and the boy cringed.

'Great… she will know I'm a freak now.' He sighed.

Well, the attention had been nice while it had lasted.

"I'm sorry Sweetie, I just… overreacted a little bit. I'm sure that you are perfectly…normal." The woman laughed, though the boy could tell it was nervous and, well, faked. "Would you like to come with me?" She asked with a sickly sweet smile and the boy stepped away.

"Um… no t'anks."

"Why not? I have some…"

"Step away from the child, Bloodsucker!" A deep, masculine voice came from behind the silver haired woman.

The boy watched as said woman turned around faster than he'd ever seen anyone move. Her kind demeanor gone, the green eyed child could see the woman bare her teeth at the man and…

'Are those fangs?' The child thought in wonder.

Sure, he had heard about vampires but… weren't those just myth? Stories to scare children and thrill adults?

The woman began to advance on the man and the boy wanted to help. He took a step forward, intent on trying to trip the woman up, but it was unnecessary. Before he even made it a second step there was a bright, blinding light and the silver haired lady disappeared with a horrifying scream.

'What… what just happened?' The boy wondered and noticed there was another woman. This one was different though. This new lady had black hair pulled up into a sophisticated hairdo, and she was holding a wooden stick. 'Can it be? Oh my! Can it be a real live vampire hunter?' Only a vampire hunter would have a wooden stake, right? 'That is so cool!'

"Are you alright, little one?" The man asked, but the boy was still focused on the woman.

"Awe you… awe you a vampiuh huntuh?" The wide eyed child inquired and the woman smiled.

"Something like that. Where are your parents, little one? It is not safe here." At the woman's question, the child frowned.

"My pawent's awe dead, Ma'm."

The couple looked at each other for a moment before they turned their attention back to the child.

"Um… where are your guardians, little one?" The man asked and the child shrugged.

The boy hadn't a clue, honestly, so why try and explain? Besides, his family said not to try and find them so it was best he not tell anyone about the Dursleys. If he told these people, they would probably try and find his Aunt and Uncle and… He didn't really WANT anyone to find his family.

Being away from those people was nice, actually. Not having to worry about chores, or punishment, or lack of…

'Oh, I will need food… maybe I should let these vampire hunters know what happened. Maybe they can find them. My Aunt and Uncle said I shouldn't come looking, they didn't say someone else couldn't.'

"Um… Dey lef' me nex' to da clock and said not to find dem… But dey didn' say owers couldn'." The child smiled and the couple again shared a look.

"Are they nice?" The woman asked and the child shook his head.

"Not reawy." The child sighed and the woman's eyes narrowed.

'Uh oh… They're not gonna like me now.' The boy thought sadly.

"Then how about we be your family instead?"

"Zemi! We can't just…"

"Ry!" The woman cut the man off. "They abandoned this child with orders not to find them, there is no way I will take the child back to THAT." Zemi growled at the man and the boy looked at her wide eyed.

'Is she… worried about me?'

When the lady noticed the look the child was giving her she sighed and turned to him with a smile.

"Don't worry little one, I won't hurt you. What is your name?" Zemi asked and the child could tell by the look in her eyes that she was sincere.

There was just one problem…

"Mm not sure, Ma'm. A'nt and Unca call me boy or fweak." The boy responded and the woman glared.

"That settles it, you are not returning to those horrible people."



"Meeting. Now." The man stated and walked a little ways away.

"Be right back, little one. Just hang tight and I will get you an ice cream after my husband and I talk a second. Okay?"

Green eyes widened and the boy nodded excitedly.

"Okay! I never had ice cweam befo'!" The raven haired child exclaimed happily.

The woman bit her lip as she looked at the child sadly. "We're going to have to fix that." She smiled before she turned and walked over to the man, leaving the boy with thoughts of the wonderful yummy cold food that his cousin would constantly eat in front of him.

Once his wife had joined him, Ry quickly threw up a privacy ward.

"Zemi, I know you are upset about not being able to have a child but… we can't just steal someone else's!"

"No, don't you see? Everything happens for a reason. His family abandoned him… think about it. We can take him, we can be his family and love him and…"

"But he's not one of us. Can you honestly handle the shame of supposedly having borne a Squib when the time comes?" Ry questioned and Zemi's bubble seemed to deflate a bit.

"Better the shame of having a Squib than no child at all." She hissed. A moment later she perked up and smiled at him. "Besides, he's the perfect age."


"And look at him! His coloring mirrors mine almost perfectly. Fixing his eyes will be easy, and we can blood adopt him so there are no questions. The goblins are great about keeping things confidential and..."


"No! I need this Ry… I cannot go home without… Please Ry. He needs people who care, who will give him a name and call him by it."

Rynell sighed. He knew it was a losing battle, and Zemi had a point. The boy had been abandoned apparently, and it seemed that his family didn't treat him well. But…

"Wait a second… What did he mean they call him freak?"

A/N: Please note, before you comment on Harry's thoughts vs. speech, he's only about four. His thoughts are more developed but, seeing as he isn't allowed to talk much, his vocals are still developing to be able to pronounce things well... Anyway, what do you think? Are my OCs entertaining? They have really come alive in my head and I'm enjoying them :D lol