Disclaimer: Sadly I don't own them. I wish I did. I own nothing but I do love this show so very much that I can't stay away.
I hope you enjoy this little story and I apologize again here and now for my mistakes because English isn't my first language.
A fish anda lot of thoughts
"First of all she is notmy girlfriend, and second of all..."
I've pretty much lost the rest of the speech because my brain cells have focused only on those first eight words, the rest is almost slipped away, while my heart did a somersault of joy. Of course I responded in a very clear way, and as always, we continued to discuss throughout this day that, from boat trip to catch my first tuna, has become almost a nightmare. Luckily it all worked out for the best and now we are here at Kamekona's for eating the fish I catch. We are all here, everyone, even Cath. Yeah, Cath ...
I remember the moment when we disembarked from our adventure and Cath went towards him "Steve, I was so scared" embracing him tightly. I tried to joke saying that I was fine, but I realized that the phrase came out through my clenched teeth, while a little knot was formed in my stomach, seeing them so embraced.
Even now I cannot help but watch them, sitting together, shoulders touching at every movement and Cath's look on him, while Steve plays with the others. I cannot help looking at him and then Steve smiles at me with an accomplice grin, as if there was a secret between us and only we knew it. That knot melts a little.
When Steve leans toward me and whispers "To Billy Selway" I think I couldn't love him more than that.
"First of all she is notmy girlfriend, and second of all..."
I almost didn't realize what I said after these words, because they are the only ones that I want to be very clear in Danny's mind: Cath is not my girlfriend, she has never been, she is a friend with whom every now and then I spend my time. We are friends with benefit and if Cath believe there is something more, for me there isn't, I was always very honest with her. The time we spend together is nice, but there is nothing that goes beyond the physical pleasure for me. Only that. When, at the harbor she hugged me, I returned the hug, but I would have done with anyone, it doesn't mean anything. And see Danny pass by without looking at me made me grow up a little knot in my stomach.
Even now, as we sat together, I hardly notice her being there, I have eyes only for Danny. Every now and then I surprised him looking at me and then I smiled at him, trying to convey what I feel inside my heart, but that I am not be able to express. I've never been good with feelings.
When I lean towards him and I whisper "To Billy Selway," what I read in Danny's eyes makes that knot melts a little.
They finished their lunch, still laughing and joking, until it was time to go home.
Danny saw that Cath was talking to Steve and kept a hand on his arm. He turned and, after greeting the others, he headed for the Camaro. He was about to open the door when he heard a voice calling him.
"Hey Danny!" he turned around and saw Steve "Where are you going?" he asked him.
"I'm going to take Grace this afternoon, she stay with me, Rachel allows me to spend time with my little girl" he said sarcastically "I told you, remember?" and he put his hands on his hips, taking a belligerent posture.
"Yeah ... I know ..." Danny realized that Steve looked down staring at his shoes.
"Well, what is it? And why you even ask me if you already know the answer? Do not you have better things to do than bore me making pointless questions? Why don't you try to bore Catherine? ".
Steve looked up and smiled, tilting his head a little by his side in that way he had, that made him want to hug him.
"Because I prefer to bore you ..." he retorted "I'm also without the car, can you give me a lift?" he said, putting a hand on his shoulder.
A hand that made him burn the skin, Danny thought. The man was a walking heater, or maybe it was what he felt for him that made him think like this? He roused himself and looked around the parking lot. In fact, the Silverado was not there and the others had already all gone. Cath included.
"Ok, get in, I give you a ride" he said sighing "but I'll drive".
Once in the car Steve reached over to turn on the radio, but a slap on his hand stopped him.
"Hey," he protested.
"I'm driving and I decide whether to turn on the radio or not ok? So ... I'll take you at your house or is there some other place where you want to be shuttled? ".
"My house is fine, even if ..." he paused, turning his face to look out the window.
"Even if what Steve?".
Steve did not answer immediately, he seemed almost embarrassed and Danny pressed him until he decided to speak.
"I know that the time you spend with Grace is not enough and I don't want to interfere in your moments with her, but ...".
"But what Steve? Do you want to say what you have to say?" though, perhaps, he had already figured out where he was going.
"It's a little bit that I don't see her..." he murmured without looking at Danny.
"Would you like to come with me?".
Steve finally turned to him and stared into his eyes.
"Do you mind? If you don't want just tell me, I don't take offence, after all she's your daughter and you have the right to spend time alone with her. It's perfectly normal that you want to see her alone, there are so few opportunities and Rachel is always so reluctant to do you a favor, so if this time ... "
"Steve, Steve? Will you shut up? Will you shut your mouth? Steve!" but he continued to babble and then Danny swerved suddenly and stopped the car on the roadside.
"Hey, what are you doing?".
Danny grabbed him by the shoulders and stared at him.
"I said it's okay, come with me, I'm glad if you're there too"
Steve stood for a moment with his mouth open.
"Oh ... ok ... then ... thanks Danny"
I restart the car and, inside me, I smile. Steve is just a Neanderthal when it comes to emotions and feelings. But this is one of the many reasons why I cannot be without him and without this infernal island that has become my home. Perhaps, someday, I will tell him.
Danny just starting up the car and I pull a silent sigh of relief. I was really hoping for him to say yes and let me stay with him and Grace. Those are my best moments, when I spend my time with the two of them, they make me feel like part of the family. And this is one of the many reasons why I cannot be without him and this island is back to being my home after a long time. Perhaps, someday, I will tell him.