Night of Fear

I crawl forward to her. My hands and knees are torn and bruised, but still I force myself forward. Around me, the night is dark and cold. Only the dim glare of the full moon gives me visibility. I'm tired, weak, and in pain. It's worth it to see her, though. I love her; I hate her; I need her.

A fool there was and he made his prayer

Even as you and I!

She's waiting for me in our secret place. I won't keep her waiting. I will make it to her; I will love her. My hair grows dark, my eyes tighten, my nails are blades, and my bretah is heavy.

To a rag and a bone and a hank of hair.

We called her the woman who did not care

I salivate on the ground as I crawl. My dreams are of her; my nightmares are her's to command. Claws dig into the dirt with every burst of effort I have. I feel myself snarling at the challenge the night issues. My body trembles with a passionate rage. She's so close, but I can feel myself fading. My true self; the side of me they see by day, has long died.

But the fool he called her his lady fair

Even as you and I!

Oh the years we waste and the tears we waste

And the work of our head and hand,

Belong to the woman who did not know

(And now we know that she never could know)

And did not understand!

I struggle to remember my name. It doesn't matter, though. All that matters is her; all that matters is uniting the burning fire inside the two of us. I need her; I hunger and thirst for her. I know she must feel the same way as I do. It's only the way of the world that calls the two of us together; intertwined in an uncontrollable force that eternally relies on our love; our bond; our lust. I am no longer a man trying to find a woman; I am nature's ape. I am the slave of fate. All relies on me; All relies on her. I must reach her. This is how things are meant to be, and what follows is unimportant. I'd give her anything. I'd give anything to reach her now. The light of the full moon now empowers me; I roar inside as I see her.

A fool there was and his goods he spent

Even as you and I!

Honor and faith and a sure intent

But a fool must follow his natural bent

And it wasn't the least what the lady meant,

Even as you and I!

Then, at last, we meet. I surrender myself to her as I stroke her hair. I am in heaven; I am in hell. I am with her, and that is all that matters and drives me from this moment on.

Oh the toil we lost and the spoil we lost

And the excellent things we planned,

Belong to the woman who didn't know why

And now we know she never knew why

And did not understand!

Then, in that same instant, she sinks inside of me, and I am alone. Alone in the naked light of the moon; alone to wither and die in the recoils of what I was sure was love. She never knew; she never felt what I felt for her. Now, I am truly alone. I am driven by hate, though it fades. All fire within myself has died without mercy or glory. Now, all is gone within me. I remain no more than bestial.

The fool we stripped to his foolish hide

Even as you and I!

Which she might have seen when she threw him aside-

But it isn't on record the lady tried

So some of him lived but the most of him died-

Even as you and I!

And it isn't the shame and it isn't the blame

That stings like a white hot brand.

It's coming to know that she never knew why

Seeing at last she could never know why

And never could understand.