Ficlet: How Sweet the Sound
Author: sandymg
Summary: There are many ways to lose a soul. And more than one way to get it back.
Spoilers: Coda for S08x02 What's Up, Tiger Mommy?
Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural or any of its characters.

How Sweet the Sound

There are more than one way to lose a soul.

Sam studied the empty expression on his brother's face across the seat of the Impala and wondered what exactly came out of Purgatory. Dean was lean and mean and fought like never before. He didn't flinch. Didn't hesitate. It was ... familiar. Sam remembered being that kind of hunter. Simple. He was self-aware enough to know that part of him had liked it. Hell, he'd almost killed to keep it.

But Dean didn't let him keep that. Dean had to save him. And in a way he had, even if it had almost destroyed Sam.

Yes, there are many ways to lose a soul. And more than one way to get it back.

Dean had made a deal with Death for Sam's. He lost. Yet through sheer will made it happen anyway. Except Sam's soul was massacred beyond repair. So, no, he wasn't quite saved then.

The truth was something else. And Dean would never accept it. But really Sam was saved when a dog ran in front of his car and he couldn't stop quick enough. In a world of loss too huge to comprehend, Sam suddenly felt something normal. A proportional fear, a reasonable anxiousness, a sickness in his gut that made sense.

Dean driving the Impala used to represent Sam's very definition of normal.

But something had snapped when Sam stood alone in a room of black goo.

And something popped back into place as he felt trembling fur beneath his fingers.

The passing, meaningless miles did nothing to help Sam figure out how he was ever going to bridge that divide and save what was left of Dean's soul.