Disclaimer: I don't by any means own Splatalot. I'm just a fan.

It was another glorious morning in the Kingdom of Splatalot. The weather was great; it was sunny but breezy. It was the perfect day to send Attackers splatting to the ground.

Six of the nine defiant Defenders were currently in the castle's dining hall eating breakfast. The six were Knightriss, Thorne, Crocness, Kookaburra, Skabb, and Ballista. The three absent were Shaiden, Tinkor, and Gildar. Shaiden had left earlier in the morning to go hunting. Tinkor was busy helping Matt fix Jason's camera before the latter realized that it had been "borrowed without permission" and "accidentally dropped from a high altitude." Gildar was in the middle of some deep conditioning.

At the table, the Defenders were discussing their strategies for the day. The Attackers were coming for the crown, and the Defenders needed to be ready. Gildar, Ballista, and Skabb would be defending the moat, and Knightriss, Kook, and Crocness would be defending the Stockade. Thorne would get to defend the castle the next time the Attackers came. The alchemist wasn't too disappointed about not being able to defend the castle that day. He had made plans for the afternoon, anyways.

As Knightriss dished out the day's orders, Thorne glanced over at the empty seat next to him. He took a sip of his English breakfast tea. He was glad that Gildar wasn't sitting next to him at this moment. Gildar had been excessively bragging about his appearance and "viking-like strength" all week. There was only so much of Gildar's vanity that Thorne could take. It was nice to have at least one moment without having to deal with his arrogance.

Knightriss's powerful voice cut into Thorne's thoughts. "Does everyone know what they're doing?"

Positive replies filled the leader's ears. Knightriss nodded with approval.


With that, the Knightriss attacked one of her sausages with her fork.

Ballista swallowed a bit of her toast, then looked over at Kookaburra. She narrowed one eye. He had a weird look on his face, as if he was trying to hide something. Noticing her stare, he quickly looked down at his plate. A small grin formed on his face.

"Kook, what are you smiling about?" Ballista asked suspiciously.

Kookaburra quickly changed his expression. "Nothing," he replied casually, stabbing one of his pancakes.

"What are you hiding?" she asked.

Suddenly, the dining hall's doors flew open. All the Defenders turned to see the glittery Gildar standing in the doorway. Everyone's eyes widened.

"Behold, the mighty Gildar," the viking announced before strutting to the table.

Kook and looked down at his plate. He quickly covered his mouth to hide his smile. Gildar seated himself at the table, then began to help himself to some sausage and bacon. It was about after he had grabbed his fifth piece of bacon when he suddenly noticed that everyone was staring at him. He smiled proudly, thinking that everyone was impressed with his handsomeness.

"I just look extra gorgeous today, don't I?"

Ballista, Knightriss, and Skabb started laughing. Gildar, suddenly confused, cocked his head.

"What's so funny?" Gildar looked from face to face. He noticed that everyone else looked like they were trying their best not to laugh or smile. "I don't follow you, what's funny?"

"Gildar, have you looked at yourself in the mirror, lately?" Thorne asked, a small grin starting to make its way onto his face.

Gildar flipped his hair arrogantly. "Only twenty times this morning," he said with a proud smile.

"I think you need to make it twenty one times," Thorne advised.

Gildar pulled out his red mirror. "That's just what I was thinking."

It took only one glance at his mirror for Gildar to understand what all the laughing and smiling was about. His jaw dropped. After he stared at his reflection for three seconds, he screamed.


All the Defenders burst out in laughter. Gildar jumped up from his chair and gaped at his reflection. It had been brown five minutes ago, what the heck happened?

"That look on your face was just priceless!" Ballista stated between laughs.

"That new color suits you real well, Gildar!" Thorne commented amidst all the noise.

The blue-haired viking was not by any means amused.

"This isn't funny!" Gildar roared.

"Then why are we all laughing?" Kook asked between hysterical cries.

Gildar could only sulk as he waited for the laughter to die down. When the Defenders finally calmed themselves, they wanted to know who was behind the scheme.

"Alright, who did this?" Thorne asked, putting on a serious expression.

Everyone instinctively turned to the mischievous Defender with the green hair. He kept his hands folded on his lap, trying not to look anyone directly in the eyes.

Ballista lifted her eyebrows. "Kook..."

The said bird tried stifling his sudden smile, but to no avail. Kookaburra admitted defeat by laughing uncontrollably once more. Gildar put his hands on his hips.

"Oh, so you did this, huh?"

Kookaburra kept laughing, completely unaware of the deep trouble he was getting himself into. "Oh, I had buckets of fun with that!"

Kook's laughter eventually slowed to a slight chuckle before stopping altogether when he noticed Gildar's darkening face. His smile melted into an alarmed frown. Before anyone could could blink, he leapt out of his chair just as Gildar lunged at him.

"GET OVER HERE SO I CAN TURN YOU INTO A THANKSGIVING DINNER!" Gildar screamed as he chased Kook around the dining hall.

Before Gildar could slap his powerful hands onto Kook, Skabb and Thorne took action. They grabbed Gildar as Kookaburra took refuge next to Crocness. The two pulled Gildar back, then tried to calm him down.

When Gildar finally had his rage contained well enough that he wouldn't take it out on the bird, the Defenders began to question how Kook had turned Gildar's hair blue. He explained that he might of "borrowed" some of Thorne's chemicals and slime ingredients, then mixed them into Gildar's bottle of extra-volumizing conditioner.

"That explains where my stuff went," Thorne said, trying to sound annoyed. "I guess when Kook mixed the chemicals into Gildar's conditioner, the result was a slow-acting hair dye."

Gildar glared hardly at Kook, then turned to the castle's alchemist. "Thorne, I need you to take my place in the moat, today."

Thorne shook his head. "No, I'm not covering for you, Gildar."

Gildar angrily threw his arms down. "I'm not going out there looking like this!"

"Your hair looks just fine," Ballista assured him.

"But it just doesn't compliment my gorgeous, viking-like face!" the viking retaliated. "If it doesn't compliment my face, then I'm at least 5% less handsome than usual, and that won't do the castle or anyone any good."

It'll do me a lot of good, Thorne thought.

"I'll have to ask Tinkor or Shaiden cover for me," Gildar stated.

Knightriss shook her head. "No, my dear boy. They're too busy, today. You need to help defend the moat; you can't abandon your post."


The barbarian groaned. "Stop acting like a little girl, Gildar! Man up! Or is that even possible for you vikings?"

Gildar glared at the barbarian. "I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you. What did you say, Alan Tonelli?"

The onlooking Defenders laughed. Skabb growled, then backed away.

"Well, Kook over here has green hair," Crocness pointed out. "If his hair is green, then it's fine for someone else to have blue hair."

"And you are still very handsome, my dear," Knightriss said.

Gildar lifted his head a bit higher. "True. I am still very handsome. And more handsome than the green-haired freak."

Kook put his hand over his chest. "Hey! There's no need for the personal attacks!"

Ballista rolled her eyes. "Come on, Gildar, we need to get out there and defend the Kingdom of Splatalot! The Attackers will be here soon!"

Gildar shifted his weight from one leg to the other, then crossed his arms. He flipped his hair, then moved his gaze to the floor. Seeing that the viking was still refusing to give in to his fellow Defenders' pleas, Thorne decided to make a bargain.

"I'll make you a deal: you defend the moat while I make you a shampoo to return your hair to its normal color, then I'll switch off with you in the third round so you can use it."

Gildar narrowed one eye at Thorne. He was just about to protest when Thorne interrupted.

"The longer your hair stays blue, the longer it'll take for the shampoo to work."

Was that true? Maybe, maybe not, but Thorne was the only one who really knew. Gildar placed his hands on his hips and looked at the ground. All the Defenders watched him, each wanting to know what his answer would be. Finally, after a long moment, the viking groaned in defeat.

"Fine," he grumbled, looking up. "I'll still defend the moat. But you better make sure that shampoo is ready by the third round!"

Thorne put his fist to his chest. "I guarantee that it will."

Gildar nodded stiffly. He removed his hands from his hips, then turned to leave. After shooting Kook a "you're so gonna get it" look, he marched as proud and as viking-like as he could out of the dining hall. When he was gone, the other five Defenders turned to their leader.

"Defenders to battle stations!" Knightriss ordered, lifting her fist into the air.

Ballista clutched her Splatbow. "Alright, Defenders, let's get started!"

Crocness nodded eagerly as Skabb roared. Knightriss turned to the Australian bird, then pointed at the table.

"Kook, you clean up before you go to the Stockade," she commanded.

Kook groaned, but quickly shut up when Knightriss gave him a powerful scowl. Ballista and Skabb laughed mockingly, then followed Crocness out the cafeteria's heavy wooden doors.

Knightriss looked down at Thorne, who had re-seated himself at the table. She crossed her arms. "Thorne, my boy, you better get started on that shampoo."

Thorne held up his gloved hand. "Oy, at least let me finish my tea, first!"

Knightriss sighed and nodded, then uncrossed her arms. After taking one last sip of her bitter coffee, she marched out the dining hall. When the doors had slammed shut, Kook began clearing the plates, Thorne watching as he did so.


Kookaburra looked over at Thorne. "Yeah?"

The alchemist stood up and walked over to the bird. He carefully glanced around the room. Once he was sure that he and Kook were completely alone, Thorne held out his fist.

"Nice teamwork," he said with an amused smile as Kook bumped his fist.

Okay, so there's my first fan fiction. Sort of. This is the first one I've finished, at least. If you wish to leave a review, that'd be great! Constructive criticism is always appreciated. If the characters weren't in character, please let me know. Thanks for reading!