Well, here I am, after all these years. I'm back to give fanfiction writing a second, or third chance. I hope you enjoy the story. I have no beta so all the mistakes are my own. Disclaimer on profile.

CHAPTER ONE

I tapped my fingers on my keyboard in frustration. The empty email on my desktop mocked me and I groaned, placing my elbows up on the desk and running my hands through my hair. Why couldn't I concentrate today?

I smiled pathetically to myself. I knew very well why I couldn't concentrate and it all had to do with the fact that I hadn't seen my husband in two days. Well, that wasn't entirely true. We had skyped, as we always did when he left for business, but I hadn't touched him, had had his hands or lips on me in two days and it was driving me mad. He was due back tonight and I cursed Sweden for being so far away.

There was a small beep before Hannah's voice came through the intercom startling me out of my thoughts.

"Ana? You have a visitor."

I looked up and frowned.

"Who is it?" I asked checking the time. I couldn't remember if I was scheduled for any meetings or not.

"A couple of students looking for a quote." She said. It sounded like she was smiling but I couldn't be sure.

"Oh, okay send them in." I said straightening my shirt. Hannah's vagueness caught me off guard but I brushed it off. The door to my office pushed open and I looked up and smiled. It was my children, come to pay me a visit at work.

I stood and moved around the desk, my heart overflowing with happiness at the sight of them.

"Hey guys. This is a surprise." I said taking Teddy into my arms, then Phoebe and last but not least my little Ella. Five years after Phoebe was born, I had gotten pregnant again, and Christian had finally consented using his biological mother's name. We had struggled through so much in those first few years of marriage, facing his demons. It took a long time, but finally he made a break through. He wasn't perfect after that, but he was better, more at peace.

"What are you all doing here?" I asked settling back smiling at them.

"Just stopping by after school." Teddy said shrugging. He swung his keys around his finger easily and I smiled at him. For his 16th birthday, Christian and I had bought him an Audi, top of the line. It was way too much to give to a 16 year old, and Christian and I had fought about that for months before he reasoned that it was the safest car possible. As soon as I saw that angle, I caved. Now Teddy was 17 and still took immaculate care of his car, much to my relief. He was too much like his father not to though.

"How was school?" I asked moving to the plush leather sofas in my office. Memories of the last time I had used these came flooding through my mind. It was last week when Christian had surprised me at work.

I blushed remembering exactly what we had done on the soft leather. The kids, thankfully, didn't notice.

"Boring." Phoebe said sitting next to me. I smiled and stroked her soft red hair. Ella climbed up on my other side and curled into my side. I smiled and kissed the top of her head.

"How about you sweetie?" I asked looking at my youngest. She smiled at me and it struck me how much she looked like Christian. She was only nine years old, but already she was just as striking as her two older siblings.

"Fine. Mrs. Andrews got mad at me because I read ahead again." She said scrunching her nose. I smiled. My little Ella, too smart for her own good. I laughed and kissed the top of her head again.

"Are you and daddy coming home tonight?" Ella asked looking up at me. I smiled at her.

"Of course we are honey. Why wouldn't we?" I asked.

"Because when daddy has been away, you always go away before he comes back." She said pouting. I smiled at her, my sweet, very observant little girl.

"Don't worry sweetie. I'll be there tonight to tuck you into bed. Daddy will be too. I'll make sure of it. I promise." I said hugging her tightly. Satisfied with my words she snuggled back into my side.

"Mom?" Phoebe asked looking at me. I turned to her smiling. "Mommy can you talk to dad when he gets back?" She asked slowly. I eyed her curiously. She only called me mommy when she wanted something.

"What about Hon?" I asked trying to conceal my smile. I had a feeling this was either about boys or security. She blushed only lightly and looked at Teddy who was sitting back easily, watching her with an amused expression.

"Tony Silverman asked me out today and I really really want to go out with him." She said rushed. "He's so cute and all the girls like him and he asked me out!" She explained. I smiled at her.

"Honey that's great, but you know no dating until you are 16." I said pulling an arm around her.

"But that's not fair! All my friends are allowed to date!" She wailed. "Can't you convince dad that I'm mature enough?" She cried.

"Honey, this isn't just your father's rule." I said smiling at her. She sighed.

"I wish I was 16." She grumbled crossing her arms across her chest. I smiled.

"You will be soon enough baby girl." I promised her. I guess she wasn't terribly mad at me because she did let me hold her to my side, which I was grateful for.

We sat cuddled on the sofa another few minutes before my blackberry started ringing and Hannah came in to let me know I had a meeting in twenty minutes. I looked at the clock. It was only 3:10. I sighed wishing the day was over and I could go home with my kids.

"Alright kids, I have to get back to work." I said softly. Ella wrapped her hands around me tighter.

"I don't want to leave mommy." She said into my side. I smiled at her.

"I know sweetie, but I'll see you in a few hours okay?" I asked looking down at her. She nodded, her big blue eyes sad. I smiled at her and kissed her forehead. We all stood and I hugged Phoebe and then Teddy. "Thanks for stopping by. It made my day." I said smiling at them. They all smiled back at me.

"We'll see you at home." Teddy said taking Ella's hand in his. He was so much like his father, down to even his overbearing protectiveness of his sisters. It was sweet most of the time, though I could see Phoebe was starting to get frustrated with it. Maybe one day she'd appreciate it. I hoped that was true. I didn't want her to resent her brother at all.

I thought of how I had hated the security when I first met Christian. Now I hardly minded. It suddenly made much more sense after we had had kids.

I walked with the kids out to the lobby where Frank Rhodes stood with Sawyer. We'd met Frank shortly after Teddy was born. Taylor had recommended him to us and we'd hired him to be Teddy's security detail once he started school. He'd been with us ever since and had even brought on two new additions to his team for Phoebe and Ella. I smiled at him as we approached and he gave me a tight smile.

"Hello Frank." I said in greeting. "Luke."

Sawyer smiled back at me with less reservation. He'd been my security for years now and we had finally gotten past the stiffness and formality. Now he felt comfortable to call me Ana, so long as Christian wasn't around of course. Christian still got wildly jealous over the simplest things, though I'd mostly learned to deal with that jealousy.

"Hello Mrs. Grey." Frank and Luke responded.

"The kids are heading home." I said to Frank. He nodded. "Take care of my babies Frank." I said smiling at him. He cracked half a smile and nodded. "Okay you three, I'll see you when I get home." I said hugging them again. They all nodded and left with Frank. I turned to Luke who was waiting just on the fringe, like always. I nodded for him to follow me upstairs and he fell into step with me.

"Have you heard from Taylor?" I asked quietly. He nodded.

"He and Mr. Grey should be on the plane back from Stockholm now." He informed me. I nodded and bit my lip. God I missed Christian. He'd only been gone a few days, on a business meeting he absolutely had to go on, but being away from his was retched. I couldn't wait for him to get back home.

"Ana?" Luke said quietly. I looked up at him, shaking my thoughts away. He was holding the elevator doors open for me on the top floor. I didn't even remember getting in the elevator.

"Thanks Luke." I said stepping past him. He nodded and followed me inside. I glanced at my watch. "I have to get to a meeting." I said sighing. He nodded.

"Alright Ana, I'll see you later." He said stepping behind me. I nodded and rushed on toward the conference room. Just one more meeting then I could go home.

The house was abuzz when I got home that evening. Gail was running about making sure things were immaculate. There were of course, because she was amazing at her job.

"Gail what's going on?" I asked surprised. Gail looked up and smiled at me.

"Oh hello Ana. How was your day?" She asked giving me a brief smile. I shrugged.

"Fine. Is everything alright?" I asked. She nodded.

"Oh it's fine dear. I suppose I'm just anxious. Jason is coming home today and Sofie called me to tell me she wanted to stop by and tell him that she's pregnant. She's been trying to tell him for weeks now, but it's been put off and now the baby shower is around the corner and she has to tell him." Gail said exhaustedly. I smiled gently at her. Gail and Taylor had gotten married about ten years ago. Sofie, who had practically grown up here through her teen years, was very close to Gail, and even me. She had confided in me about being pregnant ages ago, right after she had told Gail, but she was too nervous to break it to her father. I couldn't blame her. Taylor was a sweet man, really he was, but he was almost as overprotective with Sofie as Christian was with me. I could understand her hesitance.

"Is there anything I can do?" I asked Gail. She shook her head smiling at me.

"No dear, thank you though. I'm sure you've got enough to think about with Mr. Grey coming home." She said smiling at me. I grinned.

"Yes, I've missed him terribly." I admitted. "Are the children around?" I asked. Gail nodded.

"Ella is in the library and Phoebe is with her tutor. Last I saw Teddy he was in the music room." She said. I smiled at her.

"Thanks Gail." I said going to put my suitcase down and find my kids.

"No, no Miss Phoebe. Wrong tense. We are speaking in the present, not the past!" I looked in the study where Phoebe was sitting with her French tutor, Amelia. Following in Grace's footsteps, we'd made sure that all the kids were learning a language. Teddy, who was incredibly proficient, had mastered French and had moved on to German three years ago. Now he was almost completely fluent in both languages. Phoebe had a knack for languages, but they just didn't interest her yet which was holding her back, though when she spoke French I thought it sounded beautiful.

Ella, my sweet little Ella, had asked to learn Chinese. No body I knew spoke Chinese, but as soon as she wanted to learn it, Christian had flown in the best tutors, straight from China. Only the best for his little girl.

"I'm trying." Phoebe whined. "Can't we take a break?" She pleaded. Her tutor glared at her.

"In French." She requested. I smiled and continued on.

Teddy was at the end of the hall, in the room that had a perfect view of Seattle. Christian had set up a piano facing it. I smiled to myself as I watched Teddy playing flawlessly, just like his father.

With every passing day, the more I see Christian in him. Not just his looks, which are almost exactly Christian's apart from his eyes, he got his eyes from me. No I could see it in his walk, in the way he handled people, with clear calm confidence. He was tenderer than Christian was with people, but apart from that, they could be twins.

I thought of Teddy moving out next year, hopefully headed for Harvard. He wanted to go and I was praying he saw it through. The thought of him leaving though saddened me greatly. My baby. My first child.

Moving away from the room silently, I went out in search for my youngest.

Ella was siting in the library, her knees folded to her chest as she sat and read. I smiled at my little angel. She was so quiet and reserved, unlike her older sister. She had a way about her. My mom once called her an old soul, which I had found quite fitting.

Ella looked up then from her book and smiled at me. "Hi mommy." She said jumping up from her chair and running over to hug me. I held her in my arms, keeping her close to me.

"Hi honey." I whispered.

"Do you want to come read with me?" She asked looking up at me. I smiled. I couldn't deny those soft blue eyes anything.

"Of course." I whispered moving into the room. We sat on one of the long soft leather sofas and I grabbed the book that was sitting nearby. Ella climbed into my lap with her own book and snuggled into my chest.

We sat there a long while, reading together.

"This is possibly the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."

Christian's voice drew my attention immediately from my book and both Ella and I looked up. There he was, my Fifty, dressed in a deliciously fitted dark gray suit with a slim light grey tie.

"Daddy!" Ella screamed, jumping up off my lap and running to him. He scooped her up and held her to his chest.

"Hello my precious." He breathed into her hair. She smiled at him.

"Daddy I don't like when you leave. It makes mommy very sad." Ella whispered, rubbing her hand against his cheek. He smiled at her.

"It makes me very sad too." He confided. Ella smiled at him. "I left a gift for you with Mrs. Taylor. Why don't you go see what it is." He whispered. Ella nodded and kissed his cheek before hopping out of his arms and dashing away. Christian turned his attention to me and I smiled at him, raising from the couch.

"Hello Mr. Grey, have a good trip?" I asked quietly.

"I suppose it was productive in the business sense, however Mrs. Grey I did not enjoy one moment of it." He said watching me walk over to him. I smiled up at him as I got nearer.

"Even though it was in beautiful Stockholm?" I asked quietly.

"It could have been Heaven and it still would have been miserable." He whispered, pulling me to him when I was close enough. My body sang at his contact. My god I missed this man. I smiled at him.

"Mr. Grey, are you trying to flatter me?" I asked coyly. He smiled down at me.

"No Mrs. Grey, just being honest with the woman who means the most to me in the world."

I swooned, just a little bit and reached up to kiss him. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me to him.

"Mr. Grey I'm glad you're home." I whispered against his lips. He smiled, a gentle shy smile.

"Mrs. Grey I never get tired of hearing that." He confides. "Let's go away tonight. I've missed you so much baby." He said kissing my jaw. I tilted my head and sighed as he gently assaulted my neck with his very skilled lips.

"We can't." I moaned. "I promised Ella we would be here to tuck her into bed tonight." I whispered.

"Then we will leave once she's asleep." He insisted. I sighed.

"Christian, we need to be here tonight. We'll go away this weekend okay?" I asked pulling away from him enough to see his face. He sighed and leaned his forehead against mine.

"As you wish Mrs. Grey." He said kissing me again. I smiled.

"Come on, let's go check on the kids." I said stepping mostly out of his embrace. He kept his arm around my waist and nodded, leading me back to the living room.