A/N I thought this up while eating ice cream. It takes place in season one because that's where it makes sense, and because I prefer season one over season two. I'm not done with Secrets Told, I just don't have it on my new computer yet. Sorry about that. Enjoy!
Wally ran into the cave. "Hey Guys! The Wall-man is here! Who's ready to-" Wally paused, and looked around. No one was there but an irritated looking Superboy.
"No one else is here. Quit yelling."
Wally frowned. "Where's everyone else?"
"M'gann is cheerleading. I don't know where everyone else went," Conner responded.
"Oh." Wally flopped down on the couch. The clone did not look like he was in a chatty mood. Wally decided not to bother him. He counted the stalactites on the ceiling. He did his science homework. He ate a snack. All of this took him five minutes, and his resolution to not bother Conner lasted five minutes and fifteen seconds. Wally was bored out of his mind.
"Conner," hissed Wally. The clone didn't respond. "Conner," he repeated, a little louder.
"What?" Conner responded.
"Do you like to play Scrabble?"
"What? No," the clone answered, mildly confused. When Superboy didn't kill him, Wally took it as an invitation to continue.
"Do you like Tootsie Rolls?"
"Do you like monkeys?"
"Do you like zebras?"
"Do you like ice cream?"
"How can you not like ice cream!?" exclaimed Wally. He was beyond shocked that Conner didn't like ice cream. There was no one-no one- in their right mind who didn't like ice cream.
"I've never had it before. M'gann has made sure that I've eaten all the 'earth food' I'd like, so if she didn't feed me ice cream, then I'd probably not like it all that much," Superboy replied. He seemed slightly amused at Wally's reaction to him saying he didn't like ice cream.
"We are sooooo gonna fix that," Wally declared. There wasn't going to be anyone on this team who hadn't tasted ice cream. Ice cream was like a staple or something! It was one of those things that should be on your bucket list if you didn't have it as a baby. Ice cream was good.
"How do you plan to-" Conner was cut off mid sentence when Wally yanked him off the couch towards the Zeta tubes. Wally could be very strong when he wanted to- it also helped that he had caught the clone by surprise.
"C'mon, Conner. We're going on a field trip!" said Wally as he dragged the other boy across the floor.
"Yeesh, I'll come with you if you'll just quit dragging me," said Conner, annoyed. "Where are we going exactly?"
"The best place to get ice cream, of course!" When he saw Superboy's confused expression he elaborated. "Baskin Robbins. It's an ice cream place." Wally punched a set of coordinates into the Zeta tubes, and ran through; Conner trailing behind him.
They arrived at the Central City Zeta station. It was hidden in the cliché "out of order" telephone booth. Wally stuck his head out of the doors, and when he saw the alley was empty, he tugged Superboy out behind him.
"Follow me," ordered Wally. He ran off- at a non-meta speed, of course- and he knew Conner would follow. It was either go back to an empty cave to do nothing, or try a new treat. The choice was pretty obvious. Wally weaved in and out of pedestrians down the sidewalk until he arrived at his destination. He turned into the doorway of Baskin Robbins. Superboy followed behind him.
"Hey, Wally!" the man behind the counter said.
"Hey Matt!" replied Wally.
Conner watched all of this with a skeptical expression on his face. He wasn't too happy about trying ice cream, but it beat staying in the cave. Contrary to what Wally thought, he did know what ice cream was, he just hadn't tasted it before. The Genomes had taught him that ice cream was a frozen food containing cream or milk and butter, fat, sugar, flavoring, and sometimes eggs. He knew the dictionary definition of it, and that was all the Genomes had thought necessary to teach him. He was a little curious about the flavor of the treat, but that didn't mean he was any happier to have been dragged outside of the cave with no say in the matter. He was slightly worried, however, about the familiarity with which Wally was chatting up the man behind the counter, Matt, Conner thought he was called. If Wally came to the Baskin Robbins enough to be as friendly as he was with the employees, the clone was a little wary about the addictive properties of ice cream. That, and the health of his friend.
"… nice to see you again, Wally," Matt was saying. "You haven't been here in a while. You want your regular?" Wally nodded. "And what would your friend like?"
"Uh…" was Conner's response.
"He's never had ice cream before," Wally explained. Matt fake fainted. "Yeah, I know, crazy. Anyway, do you know of any good flavors and sizes for a beginner?"
"Yeah, any of the classic flavors are good. He should start out with a small chocolate or vanilla cone," Matt said.
"Any of that sound good to you, Conner?" asked Wally.
"Vanilla," replied Conner. It seemed like a good normal flavor to him. Not like say, 'Baseball Nut'. That just sounded wrong.
"Three large Fudge Brownie waffle cones and a small vanilla cone coming right up!" said Matt. The ice cream guy turned to make their ice creams. Wally was bouncing on his heels in anticipation. Conner thought he looked like a four-year-old on a sugar rush. Conner's stomach dropped. He hadn't even thought of that. What would a speedster on a sugar rush be like? He was regretting coming even more.
"That will be $14.86 please," said Matt. Wally paid, got their ice cream, and sat down at a table. The reluctant clone sat down across from him. Wally handed Superboy the vanilla cone, and started to eat. Conner watched Wally. He looked at his ice cream. He was confused. A person was really supposed to eat the ice cream by licking it? Wally seemed to read his mind.
"You lick it. With your tongue. Like this:" Wally demonstrated with his own ice cream.
Superboy still thought it was weird, but he tried it anyway. He cautiously stuck his tongue out and gave the vanilla ice cream a tentative lick.
"It's cold!" he exclaimed, spitting it out.
Wally snickered. "It's ice cream. Did you expect it to be warm?"
"No… just not this cold," explained Conner.
Wally rolled his eyes. "Try it again. Now you know it's cold."
Conner sighed, and took another lick of his ice cream. In the time it took for him to take a third lick, Wally had already finished his first cone. The speedster fell to the floor clutching his head.
"Brain freeze, brain freeze, brain freeze," Wally moaned.
"What's a 'brain freeze'?" asked Superboy.
Wally groaned a bit more before he answered. "It's a headache you get when you eat ice cream too fast." He got back up on his chair. "I get one every time, but the ice cream's too good for me to eat it any slower." He started on his second cone. "I get over it though, it doesn't last too long."
Conner didn't even reply to that. He just took another lick of his ice cream. He shivered involuntarily. It didn't really matter to him though, he actually didn't hate the frozen treat as much as he thought he would. He took another lick. 'I wonder what this would taste like in another flavor," he thought. As curious as he was, he didn't want to stay any longer. Wally was already vibrating slightly from the amount of sugar he had ingested, and he was only on his second cone. If anything, Superboy was more worried about what he was going to do with Wally when they got back to the cave. Wally finished his second cone, and began on his third. Superboy slowly finished his ice cream. He was warily watching Wally. He remembered what a sugar rush looked like from when he, Wally, and Artemis had to babysit for all of the kids that were left behind when the adults disappeared. Long story short, it was a bad idea to feed a bunch of toddlers lollipops until they quit crying. Wally made short work of his third Fudge Brownie waffle cone. Wally waved goodbye to Matt, and they walked back to the Zeta station. Once they got there, Wally was completely hyper from the amount of sugar he had eaten. Conner typed the cave's coordinates into the Zeta tube, and Wally zipped into the cave. Superboy followed.
It took a lot to scare the boy of steel, and there was a very short list of things that truly terrified him. Now, the list was going to get a little longer. 'Speedsters on sugar rushes' had to be added.
Conner watched the other boy zoom around the cave, shouting things that made absolutely no sense.
"C'mon Supey! Wanna play a game? Let's play tag! You're it! I love tag. I'm really good at it. No one will play with me. They say I'm too fast. That makes me sad."
Superboy was practically in shock. He had never experienced something like this before. He had thought Wally was hyper before he ate three huge ice cream cones. How the speedster had acted before looked like a sleepy panda compared to this.
M'gann was supposed to hang out with her friends after cheerleading practice, so Conner couldn't count on her for help. He had no idea how to contact the rest of the team, and he doubted the Justice League would actually stop saving the world to come help him. He was alone in trying to calm the hyper redhead down. Yay.
For some reason the Genomes had deemed it necessary for him to know what a sugar rush was, so he knew it only lasted about half an hour. It had been ten minutes since Wally had started acting crazy, so Conner could look forward to another twenty minutes of a hyper speedster. His day just kept getting better and better.
"Wally?" Conner called out tentatively. "Can you come here?"
"Yeah, sure what do you want?"
"Why don't you calm down. We could watch T.V." said Superboy.
"Um, okay," answered Wally. "Can I run around more first?"
"Sure. Fifty laps around the cave," replied Conner. He thought Wally would burn through his extra energy faster if he ran around, but with how hyped up the redhead was, he was kind of doubting it.
He was wrong. Wally returned in about five minutes, and was panting.
"Can I take a nap now? For like, a hundred years?" asked Wally. So speedsters with accelerated metabolisms only took fifteen minutes for the crash that inevitably follows a sugar rush to kick in. Conner filed this information away in his head for future use.
"I think that's a great idea," said Conner, sounding uncharacteristically relieved.
Wally fell over onto the couch. Just before he passed out, Conner spoke up.
"Thanks for the ice cream. I liked it." It wasn't much, but it was more than was to be expected from the normally grouchy clone.
"Don't mention it," replied Wally as he fell asleep.
A/N Yeah, I know it's not all that long. It's out of my head though, and that makes me happy. I mainly posted this because I was ticked off at Cartoon Network for postponing new Young Justices until January. I might write more with Wally (or Robin) teaching Superboy fun human stuff, but it'll be in a different story. Review please!