Hey! First of all, it was not my fault i haven't updated in a while! If you Pm'ed me, you'd know. My computer hasn't let me on Fanfiction to log on for almost all of October. It's not the fact that i'm ignorign you, i've actually been writing in that time, but i thought that i should at least let you know why this took me 'forever' to write. Thank you soooo much, Zach, on Fanfiction support for helping me out!
It was requested that Tony was the 'adoptive uncle' of a bunch of ambassador's kids. How it ever turned out like this? I have no idea.
Tony Stark was many things- Iron Man, Avenger, Billionaire, and something slightly overshot but still as impressive.
Sure, he wasn't a standard salesman that tried to seal the deal with a cheesy grin and a fake wink, instead he thought. He thought faster and more swiftly then many other men- able to twist words until even his most hated competitor grudgingly agreed to join companies, or give him a certain product.
The Avengers had never exactly seen said businessman- on occasion they had heard him speak on the television about the recent battles or attacks, or him releasing a new product, but they had never actually seen him.
It was a nice little meeting- a formal get together between businessmen and ambassadors alike, speaking about current projects within their country, and upcoming national events.
It was only realistic that the Avengers, would be there, speaking to representatives to dozens of different countries at the same time.
They shifted inside the building, ignoring the flashing lights that nearly blinded them, (Clint seemed stunned while Bruce just wanted to escape) and entering the building past several security guards.
Tony was completely at ease, wearing a pitch black suit ensemble with a strikingly dark red tie, beard shaved in his signature look, with a cocky smirk on his face, looking at the light grey suit Steve wore awkwardly, the darker grey one Clint pulled off rather well. The awkward very dark brown Bruce wore (Which seemed a bit to snug in his opinion) and the striking drool worthy backless black dress Natasha pulled off without a flaw.
"Good- now, first rule, don't sign or commit to anything without talking to me first. Stay away from the punch- somehow it always gets spiked. Don't leave this area or the paparazzi will burn you alive, laugh at jokes even if they aren't funny, and don't join with any of my competitors or tell them anything personal." Tony ratted off, giving a charming smile to a lady who carried around treys of small odd desserts.
"What?" Steve asked, blinking at the crowded room of people of all races.
"Oh- also. Some ambassadors bring their kids here- makes them look better. Don't make fun of them." Tony warned, face completely serious before he snatched a small pastry off of a trey and waltzing off into the crowd.
Bruce blinked, looking around before looking at Steve, who gave an uneasy shrug.
"Umm…stay together?" Steve stated, more like a question then a matter of fact as Natasha snorted ever so slightly, walking off and completely disregarding his previous statement.
It was many hours after the original split up when Steve managed to find the majority of the Avengers.
Natasha and Clint were over on the side- Natasha watching sweating men who nervously watched her and gave her pathetic eyes in which she ignored, and Clint who was eagerly adding his own comments to Bruce's commentary on who each person was.
"Hey guys." Steve sighed, walking over and leaning against the wall next to Clint.
"Ohh- you look dead. How many girls tried to get your number?" Clint sympathized, Steve blinking in confusion for a few seconds before he realized what he meant.
"What? Oh- that's not important. Anybody see Tony?" He sighed, having been ready to return to the tower long ago.
"Last I saw he was over in that crowd." Natasha lazily nodded, Steve frowning as he scanned to see Tony, or hear his noticeable laugh.
"I see him- he's over in the corner with some guy- wait, three guys… I think they'r- Oh crap." Clint groaned, causing Natasha to look up with one eyebrow arched.
"Tasha- over in the left behind the ice sculptor- is that who I think it is?" Clint groaned, Natasha frowning but looking, stiffening before she growled low in her throat, teeth clicking together.
"What? Who is it?" Bruce asked, looking up and scanning the room.
"Zukov." Natasha growled, accent surprisingly thick as she pronounced the Russian name, jumping to her feet before stalking over, the three following her.
Steve frowned, sensitive ears picking up conversation long before they were within normal hearing distance.
"-rk. I think it would be in your best interests to comply."
"And I think it would be in your best interests to back off before we get into some real trouble." Tony flippantly pushed off the threat, the lead man's eyebrows lifting ever so slightly.
The man looked over Tony's shoulder, causing Tony to turn and look before giving a wide grin.
"Capsicle! Brucie! Legolas and Redwood! Ah- surprise seeing you here. This is-"
"Sergei, Sergei Zukov at your service." The man stated, giving a small bow before brushing his lips upon Natasha's hand then standing formally again in all his Russian glory.
"A pleasure, Mr. Zukov. I'm Steve Rodgers, this is Bruce Banner, Clint Barton, and Natasha Romanoff."
"Romanoff?" The man arched his brow with a sly smile curling at his lips, "A pleasure, have I met you before?" He asked, feigning surprise while Natasha said nothing, eyes cold.
"I assure you, all previous intentions are far behind us, Mr. Zukov." She stated with an icy smile, the man giving a curt nod before his eyes slid to Tony who was still frowning.
"Perhaps we should finish our discussion somewhere…quieter?"
"No." Tony cut off, leaning against the wall completely at ease.
"Because I really don't want to go outside where I'm pretty sure you have a guy ready to kidnap me or mug me- not to mention that the fact you brought several of your scientists with you without Mr. Ivunter's knowledge kinda makes me feel like this is a trap." Tony shrugged, Zukov's eyes flashing in annoyance.
"Now- Mr. Stark-"
" Uh uh- no 'Mr. Stark' me. Nobody is getting those plans, and it sure as hell isn't going to be you." Tony snapped, the man's fist balling up.
"You really must reconsider." He pressed, and Tony's lips twitched ever so slightly.
"Now that's funny- you can call off your lackey's. There is no way you're getting through Jarvis- by the way, he's frying your system- and besides, those files aren't on computer." He shrugged, just as a man in the corner let out a shout of pain, pulling a smoking ear piece out as he rushed away, blood running down his face.
"Otets!" A voice cut off his seething response, jerking his head across where a little girl, maybe eight years old darted across the floor in a sparkling silver dress- hair all pinned up as she ran with another girl next to her- the polar opposite with blonde hair and bright blue eyes, maybe around twelve.
"Otet!" The younger girl called again, rushing over to Zukov where he sighed in annoyance, jerking her upright as she looked at her flushed face and beaming grin.
"What is it- Elvira? I'm in a meeting with someone else." He sighed, Clint looking away to try and hide his snort of laughter as their previously threatening man was holding an eight year old daughter.
"I heard them say he was here again! Myat always let me talk to him- and Silke says she saw him- as did Kaspar! And-" The little girl ranted in pure excitement, causing the man to arch one eyebrow in confusion while the obviously German girl below grinned, showing off one of her missing front teeth.
"My apologize." The man growled to the bunch, and Tony grinned, eyeing the little girl before responding easily.
The girl in the man's arms stiffened, spinning around and gasping with her eyes round as did the girl on the ground, having not noticed him before.
"Great going- you scared them." Clint smirked, Natasha's lips twitching in amusement while Bruce just smiled at the girl, Steve shifting awkwardly- he didn't know how to deal with kids.
"Herr Stark?" The girl below asked, blonde hair bobbing as she tilted her head, blinking up at Tony.
"Her? Did she just call him a girl?" Clint blinked, he never was one for languages.
"It means 'Mr.' in German, feather face." Tony scoffed, turning to the girl before lowering himself to his knees in an awkward squat.
"Hallo." He grinned, and the girl beamed, rushing over to him and started hugging his leg.
Bruce blinked, rubbed his eyes, and then blinked again.
"Did somebody actually spike the punch, or am I seeing things?" He asked Clint's dropped jaw was the same effect.
The girl-Elvira- squirmed in Zukov's arms, jumping down and rushing over with a squeal.
"Gospodin Stark! Otet- look! Gospodin Stark!" The tiny girl bubbled, rushing over to stand a foot away from Tony before looking up at him with a huge adorable smile.
"About that- Zukov- normally your wife comes to these events. Bet she never told you about me, eh?" Tony smirked as the older man scowled and stomped away, the German girl finally let go, and the Russian one giggled.
"Look at you Elvira- how old are you now? 19?" He teased, and the girl giggled again, sticking up 9 fingers as she shifted in her little sparkling dress.
"And you Silke, still taking those French lessons?" He asked, the twelve year old nodding eagerly.
"Oui, je suis toujours en eux." The girl stated, mumbling slightly on the first word before smiling at the last, while Tony gave a chuckle of approval.
"Kaspar! I will be back, Mr. Stark!" The older girl gasped, darting away leaving her thick German accent behind as the smaller girl shifted nervously.
"Oh- my fault. Guys, this is Elvira Zukov- daughter of who you just saw. Normally she comes here with her mum instead, isn't that right Elvira." He winked, and the girl giggled again.
"I- I don't get it." Clint frowned, and Natasha smiled slightly to the girl.
"Is it that hard to believe that kids love me?" Tony smirked, and Bruce sighed.
"You just don't seem like a…kid…person." Steve lamely finished- just as the girl from before darted back, a blonde haired boy a little younger on her arm, as well as a few other children. A black haired Italian, a Spanish girl, two Japanese twin girls, a Scottish boy, and so many more.
"Mr. Stark! You came back!" A Dutch girl squealed, running forward and jumping up, he instinctively grabbed her as she wrapped her arms across the front of his chest in a tiny version of a hug.
"Hey Ayana, Yanna, and look at you Angelo! Wow, is that you, Bonnie-"
And Stark continued on, raining compliments on ever little kid while the Avengers watched dumbfounded as they all clambered on him. He didn't give a protest as little Elvira crawled onto his lap (once they pushed him down) and listened as he told the kids of a much more funny battle of Manhattan. (He also took out the slightest hint of anyone being hurt, or the mind control, or the crude words a few of them said.)
"…Did Stark just ditch us for a bunch of little kids?" Clint asked stunned, as he walked out, embarrassingly watching Steve flag down a taxi with a whistle only a Brookland kid could do.
"Hate the parents, love the kids. The ultimate businessman." Natasha deadpanned- not mentioning to any of them how the kids just seemed too cute to deny.
Even though the others wouldn't admit it- they didn't mind getting shunned if it was for that.
Once again, sorry for the wait. Read the italics at the top for information on my wait.
Okay, i'm going to go update Underrate Risks, yeah...right now actually.