Don't ask where this came from. No, seriously, don't.

Uh, fine... Me and the other Failbook admins were RP-ing (kinda) and, well this started with a completely innocent comment from yours truly that had everyone else laughing their heads off. We all have such dirty minds... And I'll stop here, or else the A/N will be longer than the actual fic!


Innuendos galore!

Only rated 'T' because nothing actually happens...

"Ewww... Nick, stop that!" Maya held her hand up, trying to stop the sticky liquid from splashing over her. "Stop shaking your head like that! Your juice is going everywhere!"

"S-sorry, Maya," Phoenix stammered, stopping the movement and resisting the urge to wince at the way it soaked into his suit. That's gonna stain, he thought idly.

"I'm gonna go get a towel." Maya dashed past him and out of the courtroom. A few moments later she re-appeared a fluffy, white towel in hand.

"If we can resume..." Franziska began, only to have her words cut off.

"Hold it!" Phoenix exclaimed, attempting to ignore the way the German woman wrung the whip in her hands. "Maya's still getting my juices off! She won't be a minute." Nope, the ignoring thing really wasn't working... He gulped anxiously, the death-glare Franziska was sending him making him feel incredibly uncomfortable. Wasn't he in a bad enough situation anyway?

"Your juice was really sticky..." Maya commented, seemingly more to herself than to anyone in particular. "I'm worried they might stain my dress too..."

"Trite, there's no time for this," Judge Godot interjected. "We have a cross examination to do." He sighed. "Maya, if you clean Trite up I'll buy you a triple-decker-burger later." Maya made a small 'ooh' noise and reached out with the towel, her own juice problem now forgotten. He snatched the piece of fluffy material from her hands and began to remove the juices from himself, dismaying at the large discoloured patch that was left.

"I can't even remember how that happened." He looked back down at the teen beside him as she spoke, noticing the way her index finger tapped against her chin, clearly deep in thought. "I definitely don't remember you squirting your juice everywhere like that." She paused and smiled. I just know it tasted really nice." She licked at a small spot on the back of her hand and he rolled his eyes. Typical Maya... "But you still got me really wet... You're buying me a new outfit, by the way."

"What?" He exclaimed. "Where do you even get those from?" Maya just shrugged. Here she was going to be Master and she didn't even know where the robes came from... He suddenly had a terrible fear for the future of the Fey Clan...

"Anyway..." Franziska interrupted again, her arms crossed with one hand clenching in her sleeve in that annoyed habit Phoenix noticed she had. "If we're finished with all this fooling around, I'd like to get back to the trial."

"Yes, Princess, good idea." Godot added, taking a swig of his... seventh mug of coffee? He didn't bat an eyelid at the steely glare he was shot from behind the Prosecutor's bench.

"Uh, right." Phoenix tucked the towel under his desk, making a mental note to get rid of it later. "Where were we?"

"Before you released your juices all over Maya?" Godot asked with a smug smile. He could feel his face heating up.

"Uh... Yeah..."

"Detective Butler was just testifying about the murder of Ura Dedd." Franziska supplied, smirking slightly also. Was he ever gonna be able to live this down?

"Okay." He picked the Blackcurrant Juice carton off of his desk and threw it into the bin. He knew all those balls of scrap paper would come in use eventually. "Detective Butler, please continue."

"Right." The petit woman smiled, re-adjusting her glasses and flicking her hair back from her face. "Well, you see..."

What? It was only a carton of juice...