Between the Wall and the Bed
The following events take place between Kalinda and Lana's wall sex and their most recent tryst on the bed. I attempt to make up for the huge disconnect that occurred in episode 4x03.
"Hello?" Special Agent Delaney muttered as she barely coordinated the phone to her face.
Lana's eyes flashed open at the sound of Kalinda's voice. She wasn't sure she would ever hear from her again, not after what she did – or what she didn't do.
"Is everything alright?" Lana asked softly. Her voice was strained with guilt.
"Yes, everything is fine."
The silence was deliberate torture. Lana ran her free hand up her face as she inhaled deeply. "Look, Kalinda, I…"
"You don't have to apologize. I'm not calling for an apology."
Lana felt a little disappointed. How was she supposed to be intimate with Kalinda if Kalinda kept pushing her away?
"Can I come over?"
A bubble of excitement burst Lana's belly. "Yea. Yea, you can."
A knock immediately followed her words. Surprised, Lana grabbed her gun and slowly opened the door. There was Kalinda, dressed in tight leather and knee-high leather boots. Lana's heart raced a bit. They both hung up their phones and just stared at each other for a few seconds.
"Are you going to let me in, Special Agent Delaney?" Kalinda asked in her low, seductive voice. Lana stepped back and let the door open. Lana watched as Kalinda wandered into the middle of her living room where Kalinda had taken her not too long ago. She slowly closed the door, wondering if this was a good idea after all.
"What can I do for you Kalinda?" she asked as she locked the door and placed her gun down on a small table next to the door. Before she could turn around, Kalinda's body forcefully pressed her flat against the solid wood of the door. She could feel the heat coming off of Kalinda's body, and it was intoxicating. Kalinda reached her arms around Lana's waist and expertly undid her robe. She gently pulled the clothing off of Lana's back, leaving Lana completely exposed.
"How does that feel?" Kalinda asked with a cold tone. The hairs on Lana's neck stood on their ends as Kalinda's warm breath stroked them. This is how Kalinda must have felt when she pleaded for her life. Kalinda grabbed Lana's wrist and turned her around, immediately pinning her against the door again once the turn was complete. Their lips were barely an inch apart. Lana was staring intently into Kalinda's eyes.
"I'm sorry, Kalinda," Lana whispered through a cracked voice. Kalinda didn't want to hear it so she brought their lips together in a fiery kiss.
"I said I don't want an apology," she replied, her voice dangerously low.
"What do you want then?" Lana asked desperately. Kalinda blinked and let go of her captive.
That single word hung in the air and another moment passed as they stared into each other's eyes. Lana was completely naked, but she didn't feel that way anymore. Kalinda began taking off her jacket as she gently leaned in to kiss Lana. Lana helped her unbutton and free her from her shirt, never parting lips during the process. They part walked and part stumbled onto Lana's bed where Lana finished disrobing Kalinda. As she threw Kalinda's last boot toward a random corner of the room, Kalinda placed her two hands on Lana's waist and spun her onto the bed. Kalinda climbed on top of Lana with a victorious half smile on her face. Lana suddenly felt a little nervous.
"How long have you wanted me?" Kalinda asked softly, running a finger down the middle of Lana's bare chest. Lana breathed in deeply, taking in the pleasurable sensation that followed Kalinda's finger down to the moistening lips between her legs.
"Ever since I first met you, Kalinda," Lana replied, unconsciously thrusting herself toward Kalinda's finger. Kalinda's smile spread a little wider across her face. She liked the reply so she slipped a finger inside of her. Lana moaned and pulled her sheets towards the center of her body.
"Have you ever touched yourself thinking about me?" Kalinda continued, slowly circling the walls of Lana's very wet vagina. Lana looked at Kalinda now, unwilling to answer. The smile faded from Kalinda's face and she stopped the movements of her finger. "Do I need to repeat the question? Or should I leave?"
Lana groaned as the throbbing in her groin objected to the second option. "Yes, okay? I've fucked myself thinking about you."
Thoroughly pleased with the answer, Kalinda inserted another finger inside of Lana and began a slow thrusting motion. Lana's breathing became quick and shallow as her body lifted off the bed in pleasure. Kalinda leaned herself against Lana's body, letting the coolness of her skin absorb the heat radiating off of Lana's. She placed soft, calculated kissed down Lana's neck and sucked with determination at the base of her neck, never forgetting to thrust. Adjusting to the pace, Lana was calm enough to let her hand explore Kalinda's body. She was soft and smooth. When her hands found the magic spot, Kalinda suddenly shifted, depriving her of the opportunity to enter.
"Not yet," Kalinda whispered in a jagged breath inside her ear. Kalinda began thrusting faster and harder as she brought Lana's hard, inviting nipple into her mouth. Lana moaned loudly as Kalinda began sucking and running her tongue around the nub of her breast. Kalinda inserted a third finger after it became too slippery down there for two to navigate. Lana was ready to come and Kalinda felt it. "Do it, Lana. I want you to come for me."
Breathless, her eyes flashed open and she came as Kalinda covered her scream and occupied her tongue. After Lana had calmed down, Kalinda removed her fingers and examined them. Lana watched her carefully as she placed one of the fingers in her mouth.
"I like the way you taste, Special Agent Delaney," she said nonchalantly.
Lana burned with desire and decided to take control of the situation. With a thrust of her hips, she threw Kalinda on the bed and pinned her down.
"Let's see if I like the way you taste," she whispered on Kalinda's neck. She kissed her as softly as she was kissed and trailed the kisses down Kalinda's toned abdomen. Kalinda barely resisted before she opened her legs for Lana. Lana was pleased to see how wet Kalinda was for her. She looked at Kalinda before getting into position. For the first time, she saw desire in Kalinda's eyes. It drove Lana into a deeper state of horniness. She first slipped her finger inside the outer fold and gently explored the area. Kalinda had no reaction at all. She brought her tongue to the base of the opening and licked in an upward motion, applying force with her tongue as she did so. Kalinda's legs responded pleasurably, but Kalinda made no sound. Lana took in a deep breath of disappointment. She then placed her lips around the small pea sized clitoris hiding underneath in its home and began coaxing it out with her tongue. Now Kalinda moaned, despite her efforts to mute it. Lana smiled as she let her tongue flick again and again with alternating amounts of pressure. When Kalinda stopped moaning, Lana began to suck gently on the little pea and inserted a finger inside of her. Now Kalinda thrust her pelvis into Lana's mouth and she threw a pillow over her face to muffle her pleasure. Lana took hold of the moment and placed a thumb on Kalinda's clitoris as her other hand, now with four fingers inside of Kalinda, thrust firmly and steadily. Kalinda threw the pillow off of her face and freely moaned for Lana to hear. Lana's groin began throbbing again and her own excitement began interfering with her performance. Kalinda sat up and pulled Lana toward her so that they were both sitting facing each other. Kalinda urgently reinserted her fingers inside of Lana and began thrusting with as much force and speed as she could muster. Lana threw her head back and began rocking on Kalinda's hand. Kalinda groaned as she herself was turned on by the sight of Lana's pleasure and her walls closed around Lana's fingers, who was present enough to give one powerful thrust and send Kalinda into a violent orgasm. Both women collapsed onto the bed, satisfied and exhausted. After a minute of recuperation, Lana climbed over to Kalinda and lied down next to her. She rested her head on Kalinda's chest and held her in her arms. She didn't know if she should say anything, and if she should, she didn't know what to say.
"I want to see you," Kalinda said. "On my terms."
Lana wasn't sure what she meant, but she was pretty sure she was okay with it. "See me as in the way you saw me tonight, or see me as in date me?" she asked carefully. She could feel Kalinda swallow and exhale.
"Is it necessary to specify?" Kalinda asked, as gently as she could. Lana felt hurt. She didn't just want to be Kalinda's bed bunny; she wanted a relationship with the intelligent and unbelievably attractive woman.
"One day," Lana whispered, more to herself than to Kalinda. Kalinda leaned her cheek against Lana's head and kissed it.
"I have to go now," she said abruptly. Lana furrowed her eyebrows and sat up immediately.
"It's three in the morning, where could you possibly need to go?" she challenged.
Kalinda was already slipping on her panties and fastening her bra. "Home," she replied calmly.
"Why can't you stay here?" Lana asked, certain she sounded too clingy given their non-committal relationship.
"I don't do that, Lana," Kalinda sighed as she pulled on her pants. "Look, I like you. I like you a lot, but you need to work with me at my pace."
Lana didn't reply. She simply shook her head and huffed in disagreement.
"I'll call you," Kalinda said. She looked at Lana one last time before leaving. Lana lied back down and curled up in fetus position, pulling her sheets into her core. She finally got what she wanted, but that wasn't exactly how she wanted it. Nevertheless, there was a defiant part of her that was running victory laps around her head.
Episode 4x03 (perhaps the most disappointing sex scene in the history of lesbian television?) in narrative form (credit for the scene goes to the writers of TGW) with Kalinda/Lana extensions
Lana's phone began buzzing and dancing in circles on the table. She picked up as she shuffled the last documents into their rightful folder and got up to leave for the day.
"Hello?" she answered.
"It's me," Kalinda replied. A smile crept onto Lana's face.
"It's you. Again," Lana said playfully. "What can I do for you Ms. Sharma?"
"What are you doing?" Kalinda asked, sounding only half-interested at best.
"Going home," Lana replied. "I'm glad you called, actually. Let's have dinner together."
She could see the hesitation on Kalinda's face despite the conversation occurring over the phone.
"It's just food, Kalinda," Lana sighed. "Everyone needs to eat."
"Sorry, Lana. I was hoping we could just meet up at your place and…" Kalinda trailed off.
Lana frowned. "Is that all this is about?" she said softly. Kalinda sighed.
"No, Lana. But I told you we'd have to do this on my terms."
There was a pause before Lana replied. "Alright. I'll see you at my place, then."
The mood was definitely more somber than last time. Lana couldn't stop feeling disappointed as she made love to the woman she's wanted for over two years. Kalinda appeared distant and unresponsive. Lana climbed up under the sheets and poked her head out to look at Kalinda. As expected, her eyes were open and blankly staring at the ceiling – it was difficult if not impossible to tell that she was in the middle of sex. Lana placed a kiss on the side of her neck, still no response. She pulled back enough to look at her carefully. They looked at each other in silence for a moment.
"What's wrong?" she finally asked.
"Nothing," Kalinda insisted. The phone rang immediately following her lie. Lana dipped her head in disappointment but immediately drew her lips back onto Kalinda's skin. Kalinda rejected the call and turned her head back toward Lana.
"I have to go," she said. Lana scoffed inside her head.
"You know, you did call me…"
"I know…tomorrow night?" Kalinda replied. Lana chose not to say anything and resumed her kisses down Kalinda's chest.
"Sorry to inconvenience you," she said in a low, seductive voice. Kalinda finally responded as she thrust her torso up, but her hands began pushing Lana away, preventing her soft lips from further seduction.
"Lana, I really have to go," Kalinda said sternly. Thoroughly annoyed now, Lana pulled the sheets over her chest and shifted her body next to Kalinda.
Trying her best to stifle her anger and annoyance, Lana began speaking. "Kalinda, you come here and I feel like I'm warming you up for someone else."
The words hurt more out loud than they did inside her head. She couldn't bear to look at Kalinda until she finished. Kalinda looked back at her, seemingly innocent, and said, "You're not."
Lana studied her face, looking for signs of deceit. Kalinda sat up halfway to meet Lana's face and brought their lips together in a kiss. Lana couldn't help but feel weak and give in. "I want you," she moaned into Kalinda's mouth.
"I know," Kalinda replied. "Tomorrow night. Dinner. I promise." She gave Lana a reassuring look. Lana finally nodded and let her go.
Covered in her white sheets, Lana watched from her balcony as Kalinda drove away.
Kalinda returned from her phone call and sat down. "Sorry, it was Alicia."
Kalinda unknowingly punched a sour patch of jealousy through Lana's chest. "Is everything alright?" Lana asked coolly.
"Yeah. No, she was just asking me something about a case," Kalinda replied. "I saw that Nick guy leave," she said quickly, changing the subject.
Lana chuckled softly. "Good, I didn't want him interrupting our night together."
Kalinda smiled warmly. She raised her hand at the bartender for two shots of tequila. Lana looked at her questionably as the bartender filled up the tiny glasses. Kalinda picked hers up and Lana followed suit. "To an uninterrupted night together," Kalinda said as they touched their glasses together.
"So Kalinda, how is it that you're still single?" Lana asked, looking across the table at Kalinda's beautiful face. She swirled the wine in her glass and took a sip.
Kalinda tilted her head and gave a half smile. "How is it that you're still single?" she replied. Lana put her glass down and looked into Kalinda's eyes.
"I've had my eyes set on someone for a while now. I don't like to fool around in the process."
Lana stared at her intently, letting the words sink in. Kalinda felt her groin tighten in desire. Lana slowly removed a shoe with her foot and gently slid her foot up Kalinda's leg, hidden behind the long white tablecloth. She saw a flash of need across Kalinda's face, but as all other emotions on Kalinda's face, it didn't last. Kalinda closed her eyes and rolled her head a little as she felt a pressure right outside her panties, prodding the wet cloth against her skin. She drew her bottom lip in and bit on it. Lana watched with desire. She quickly drew her foot back, relishing the moment Kalinda's eyes opened with desperation.
"How do you do that?" Kalinda said resentfully.
"Do what?" Lana asked. Kalinda shook her head gently.
"I haven't wanted anyone inside of me as badly as I want you inside of me right now," Kalinda replied, highly uncharacteristically. She immediately reprimanded herself. She didn't understand why she felt like it was acceptable to let her guard down around Lana. Lana didn't bother to hide the smile on her face.
"Let's get out of here," she said quietly, watching Kalinda watch her.
They were once again on Lana's bed, this time moving in and around each other with heated passion. Kalinda ran her hand, palm down from Lana's neck down to the point of insertion. Once she placed three fingers inside, Lana moaned and positioned herself on Kalinda's thigh. She rode Kalinda so hard the whole bed shook. Juices began to drip out of the palm of Kalinda's hand and onto her thigh from Lana's wetness. Kalinda moaned in return and grabbed Lana's hand and pushed it inside herself. Lana thrust her hand while occasionally extending her thumb to stimulate Kalinda's clitoris. In one upward motion, Lana hit Kalinda's weak spot and kept her fingers pounding on that spot until Kalinda burst into an orgasm. As Kalinda's body went limp, Lana lowered herself over her and began nibbling her neck.
"How was it?" she asked, already knowing the answer. Mmm was all Kalinda managed to get out. Lana cupped one of Kalinda's soft, supple breasts in her hand and gently massaged it. She then put her mouth over the nipple of the breast she was massaging and softly sucked on it. Kalinda's hip began moving in a circular motion, calling Lana back down to the station. Lana obeyed and put her head between Kalinda's legs. She placed her tongue directly over the opening and let it slip inside. Kalinda moaned loudly and thrust her pelvis upward.
"Please, Lana," she panted. Lana let her tongue circle around the inner fold of Kalinda's lips before inserting her tongue again. "Oh, God," Kalinda moaned. "Fuck me, Lana. Fuck me."
Lana moved her attention to Kalinda's clitoris and began dancing around it with her tongue. In the moment that she decided to let her tongue flick the clitoris, she drove two fingers inside of Kalinda directly to her weak spot and let Kalinda come onto her hand.
Tired now, Lana crawled up and rested herself on a pillow. She didn't notice Kalinda watching her.
"What?" Lana asked quietly, a little startled when she noticed two brown eyes on her.
"You're so beautiful," Kalinda replied, equally quiet. Kalinda placed a warm hand on Lana's face and cupped it. Lana enjoyed the warmth on her face and let herself drift off into sleep.
Lana was surprised to find Kalinda in her arms when she awoke in the middle of the night. She studied the sleeping woman's features. She looked so vulnerable and peaceful. She wanted to know so badly how Kalinda had become the way she was. She brushed a loose strand of hair behind Kalinda's ear. Kalinda's eyes fluttered and slowly opened.
"Hey," Lana whispered. Kalinda smiled a little.
"Hey," she replied. She dug her head deeper into Lana's body, as if telling Lana to go back to sleep.
"Why don't we ever talk?" Lana asked quietly. Kalinda muttered something into Lana's chest that was completely inaudible. When Lana didn't resume a relaxed position, Kalinda pulled away and looked at her.
"What do you want to talk about?" Kalinda replied, annoyance dripping off every word.
"You. Me." Lana looked at her innocently. "Not work. Not sex."
Kalinda rolled her eyes. "Lana, we are sex. It's that simple. We've had eye sex when we talked to each other and now we're actually having sex on a frequent basis. Since when did we ever want to become more?"
Lana looked offended. "Since we actually had sex?"
Kalinda tossed herself so her back was facing Lana. "Go to sleep, Lana."
"Kalinda, you chose to stay here tonight…doesn't that mean anything to you?"
Kalinda felt conflicted. Lana was right. She did decide to spend the night, but she wasn't even sure why. It just felt right. "It means I'm too tired to drive," Kalinda replied in a "end of discussion" tone. Lana clenched her jaw in frustration. She moved to the opposite side of the bed, as far away from Kalinda as possible, and went back to sleep.
When Lana woke up in the morning, Kalinda was gone. Typical, Lana thought to herself. She had given up any expectations she had had for their relationship. She got in the shower and prepared for work.
Kalinda went home to husband Nick at the end of the episode and they had their conversation. I assumed Kalinda went home in the morning because Nick was making breakfast. We'll see what happens in future episodes! I hope Kalinda finally acknowledges that she feels safe and comfortable around Lana, which is why she shows sides of herself to Lana that she hasn't shown to anyone before, and that they'll end up together, but that's a one in a hundred million chance…