Count Chocula's terrible secret.
A little confession, I'm A U.K citizen hence the only way I've eaten Count Chocula and Frankenberry cereal is through American Candy Stores which imports cereals. (But at least I've tried it!) But I do know Count Chocula quite well by watching lots of commercials of him on Youtube. (I'm unemployed and have too much free time.)
Nevertheless, enjoy this story! If you forgive the lack of a plot, you might get a laugh out of it!"
Count Chocula was eating his cereal in the park (tch…..commercials….who eats cereal in the park?) when a young boy came up to him. His name was Jimmy.
"Wow…it's really you. Count Chocula!" he cried
"The one and only." Chocula replied. "What can I do for you?"
"Can I ask you a question?" asked Jimmy
"Ask away." Replied Chocula
"Are you a real vampire?" he asked.
"Of course I am." He chuckled. "Why wouldn't I be?"
"Because you have square buck teeth like a rabbit. If you're really a vampire, isn't it a bit of a pain to bite victims? It must make a bit of a mess biting people."
"Alright kid, I have two things to say…..First I don't believe in biting people's necks. I think it's wrong, and number two, the high sugar content of my cereal has wrecked my teeth making them this way."
"I t may be a delicious tasting cereal but I guess it does have its flaws!" smiled Jimmy.
"Are you talking to Count Chocula." Said Franken Berry coming in out of nowhere "Go for my cereal, it's the best."
"No thanks." Said Jimmy "I think I'll stick with Count Chocula's."
"Because, Count Chocula's cereal doesn't have dye that turns your shit pink."
"YEAH! SUCK ON THAT!" Count Chocula yelled to Franken Berry
"Anyway, nice meeting you both." Said Jimmy and walked away.
"Nice kid." Smiled Count Chocula.
"Little bastard." Muttered Franken Berry.
Author's note : By the way Franken Berry has actually turned people's shit pink! It's true, in the 70's anyway, it's been sorted now