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it's hard to understand why i refuse to give up.

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it hurts knowing that you stand atop the mountain, in the freezing cold, because you just prefer to stay away from me.

that's the only reason you stay up there. you told green something else, but i know you didn't tell him the truth.

you just hate me, don't you?

you gave up your position as champion just to make sure that i couldn't challenge you. you couldn't even wait to start your journey just to get out of pallet town, as far away from me as possible.

i know that's the truth.

we were best friends, childhood best friends. but when i told you i liked you, you began growing more and more distant. if you didn't like me back, i was okay with just being friends.

was it really so disturbing that i liked you?

are you happy now that you're far away from me? are you happy standing alone on the mountain just to be as far away as possible?

it's okay. maybe one day i'll come visit you on that mountain. where are you going to go, anyway? can you possibly run from me up there?

if you do run, i'll take your place on that mountain. i'll just wait for you to return. because you'll have to come back someday, right?

i would rather die in the snow waiting for you than to ever give up.

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i know i'm not pretty. but you didn't have to make it worse by going out with her.

whitney, the self-proclaimed incredibly pretty girl. what a complete slap in the face.

i've had feelings for you for the longest, but my insecurities about my appearance made it hard for me to tell you. so i let it go and figured i'd wait until i could raise my self-esteem and fix my appearance.

but then you started dating her. and it hurt so bad.

we also used to hang out all the time, but now you're too busy with either training or spending time with her.

why did it have to happen this way? what do you even see in her anyway? is it really all about looks to you? you had googly eyes for every girl you met.

every one but me. and maybe that's why i didn't feel that i was pretty enough.

but maybe i can try to be pretty. if i work hard enough, i could possibly be as pretty as her.

i'll work hard to be the prettiest girl on the planet before i ever bother giving up.

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i can't find you no matter where i look.

are you upset that you couldn't ever win in a pokémon battle against me? that wasn't my intent. i wanted to show you that focusing on pure strength alone isn't how to properly train your pokémon.

but i guess that offended you. i didn't mean to do that.

where are you? i've looked everywhere in johto and kanto. twice. no one has seen you. why must you hide?

i miss you, and i'm sorry. the last time we spoke, you were yelling at me and very upset with me. you just wanted me to leave you alone and go away. maybe i even heard you whisper the word forever.

i can't let you leave knowing those were the last words you said to me.

because i love you more than you will ever know and i will fix our relationship.

i will search for you forever before i ever bother giving up.

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you've been in a coma for four months now. somehow your sickly health went in a completely different direction than anticipated and left you comatose.

before i even got a chance to tell you how i felt.

i learned about your hospitalization right before i challenged champion steven, and i dropped everything to rush to your side. i wanted to tell you all my pent up feelings for you, because i suddenly worried that it would be too late. i hadn't been prepared for this.

but i was late. you're not gone, but you're not here either.

the doctors aren't too sure what will happen to you. they're afraid that if you do wake up that you might not live much longer anyway.

but they said that there is a chance. if they can figure out exactly what's wrong before you wake up, they might be able to cure you.

it's a small chance, though. and the operation would be costly.

i told them that i would help your parents with the money. i would do whatever it took to save up. i've been working hard to defeat steven and become the champion so that i can be paid by the league.

but i also make sure to sit by your bedside and squeeze your hand to let you know that someone is still there.

i will wait here for when you wake up because i won't give up.

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i love you a lot, but you say we can't be together.

is it because you're much older than me while i'm still a child?

i told you that i would still love you even as i grew up so that when i was old enough, we could be together. but you think that i'll find someone else to love and move on from you.

but that's not true because i love you.

do you love me, too? maybe you just don't want to get in any trouble. but we're still friends, right?

age doesn't matter to me. i know it would to you. you could get in a lot of trouble and lose your job, and i don't want that. you work hard as a detective and i wouldn't want to ruin that.

i'll wait. i'm not sure if you would even want to be with me, you've never said, but i can wait until i'm older.

i'll wait and i'll wait and i'll wait until i'm old enough because i would never give up.

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i watched you walk away from me once you found out that i had kissed him, but it didn't mean anything. he instigated it and i couldn't help myself.

but it's not him i love, it's you.

i've always loved you from the beginning, and i still love you now. yes, i liked him at one point, too, but i never loved him like i love you.

it was just a mistake and i didn't mean it. why didn't you turn around and just listen to me?

i cried and called out your name until my voice was shot. i should have chased after you, but i knew i was wrong. maybe you just needed some space.

but you haven't contacted me in days. so i began looking for you.

i'm just hoping that maybe you'll contact me yourself because you refuse to answer my calls. i'll wait for you, but i also can't depend on you to contact me first. so i'll look for you at the same time.

it's you that i love and i'll prove it to you because i won't give up.

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i couldn't believe it when i found out that you were in a relationship with him.

i mean, i never saw it coming. i was always scared of you finding a girlfriend before i could admit my feelings for you, but a boyfriend?

i wanted to be happy for you, but all i could do was run. run and cry.

how can i ever tell you how i feel now? even if you ever break up with him, will my feelings even matter?

you are young. maybe you haven't entirely discovered what it is you truly like. you could swing both ways for all i know.

and i hang onto that hope. maybe you and him won't last long.

and then i can tell you how i feel in the hopes that you won't reject me.

and i will still be here if you decide to see me differently because i won't give up.

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and we'll still be here when you see us again. we write down our notes while we wait, but we can't even bother to uppercase the correct letters. because that's too much time spent not focusing on you.

we gave up on the silly letters, but we refuse to give up on you.


and i won't give up, either.

Shippings mentioned: BurningLeaf (Leaf x Red), NewBark (Kris x Ethan), Comfort (Ethan x Whitney), SoulSilver (Lyra x Silver), NewRival (May x Wally), Ensemble (Dawn x Looker), Chess (Hilda x Hilbert), FerrisWheel (Hilda x N), Visor (Rosa x Nate) and GreySky (Nate x Hugh)

~Midori