Naruto/Anko one-shot set 3 years after the initial 3 year time skip.

I enjoy the usual 'this makes sense' Naruto pairings as much as the next guy, however I've pretty much read them all and thus want to experiment with the not so usual pairings. I'm in the process of writing another one that doesn't revolve solely around romance, but it will also be an unusual pairing.

I really like the Naruto/Anko matchup, it DOES make sense, it'll just never happen. I created this fan faction to show a hookup that doesn't involve some super crazy sadist who only likes bi-sexual three ways with a side of Naruto. That gets old, really quick. There are very few halfway decent romance Naruto/Anko stories, so I did the only thing to solve it. Write my own.

I'd love for some R&R on this story to see if anyone enjoys it, but if you could take it a little easy on the grammar and spelling, I'd really appreciate it. I had to edit it myself, so I guarantee my grammar might be a little shaky. On another note concerning R&R, I tried to stay away from any Japanese in this story when it wasn't necessary.

I suck at character clothing descriptions so I have stuck away from them as much in this story. Oh, and flames will be used to light my cigarettes.

After the next 3 years, Anko looks pretty much the same. When I looked up her age, which was 24 at the chunin exams, I bumped it down to 18. In this story that puts her at 24 and Naruto at 18. Her height was pretty much 6ft. I'm not really sure how accurate that is, but that's what I'm sticking with at. Naruto is going to be 6'6". He will be wearing a variation of Shippuden clothes. Full black jacket, full black pants with a little orange on his over shirt. He knows who his dad is and can use Hiraishin. His is modified. No sealed kunai. He can change directions and as long as he is familiar with the area he can use it. I figure the 4th could do the same if he had more time to work on it. This definitely has a strong Naruto in it, but you don't have to see it for long.


I've also kept Asuma and Jiraiya alive for humorous purposes.


Also there is another 'attribute' which has been disliked by several readers and writers of the community. I did it and the strong Naruto because he is WAY too much of an underdog in the canon, IMO, so when I write, I bump him up pegs cause he deserves it outside of the series. I don't think Kishi should change anything about the story as it has been going at all. In fan fiction though, I can make Naruto and everybody else who I want them to be. Some will say there is a lot of OOC'ness. I believe my portrayal of the two is truly is subjective.


This story contains a LOT of mature content. It's probably the most I've seen in ANY fan fiction of this length. What can I say? I'm a pervert. If you are not of legal age to read sexual content, stay FAR away. Or completely ignore me and read it anyways. Despite the massive amount of adult content, I still believe that I kept the story interesting and appealing to romance fans as well. Oh and before I finally end my obscenely long AN, for anyone who likes threesomes or shadow clone gangbangs, this story is not for you. Personally I found the whole shadow clone thing to be ridiculous. I don't mean any disrespect to authors' who have done it before, but even if they are clones; to me that doesn't make the story an intimate Naru/femchar one. It makes it a Naru/100 guys/femchar story. Oh, and just one more thing for reviewers. Am I the ONLY person who can't stand that 90 of all romance stories are yaoi? 89 being Naruto and Sasuke. Yaoi, Yuri and harems just aren't my thing.


I don't own Naruto, blah blah, you've all heard that a million times before. Now we can get to the damn story.

Thanks to Jiraiya's information network, word had spread throughout Konoha that Akatsuki had been suffering from a serious case of in fighting. After the deaths of Sasori, Deidara, Zetsu, Konan, Hidan and Kakuzu, their once aggressive approach to capturing all the Bijuu had decimated to that of trying to rebuild their once impenetrable group while trying to keep each other from disbanding flat out due to lack of activity and unwillingness to try and form another cohesive group that the original barely managed to keep together as it was.

For this news, most of Konoha was rather impassive. To a few select few ninja though, this came with a huge sigh of relief. Kakashi was ecstatic. Jiraiya was happy knowing that this would at least be a slight reprieve for his faithful student of 6 years; that and he could go back to 'intensive' research for the first time in that time period. The Godaime herself was happy knowing that her adoptive son could at least sleep easier at night for a while.

Retrieving a cup of her sake retrieved from her secret stash, she began to sip as her over-zealous apprentice burst through the door trying to say something about Naruto and the Forest of Death. Tsunade put her dish down slowly and began to walk towards Sakura at the same pace. Dreadfully calm, she wrapped one arm around her shoulder and questioned.

"Is Naruto a small boy?"

Sakura sighed and simply said, "No."

"Do you think he can't handle a few trees and snakes?"

Knowing full well that he by himself and ONLY himself had taken down a possessed Sasuke, his possessor being the ultimate snake of all, she once again sighed and repeated herself.

"Are you Shizune?"

Sakura did not like where this conversation was going and was subtly trying to remove herself of Tsunade's arm on her shoulder to no avail.

Mustering all the mental strength she had so as not to quiver, she tried (keyword being tried) using a silk tongue approach.

"No, Hokage-sama I am most certainly not Shizune-sama." At this she bowed formally and tried to leave only to be shouldered once again in that same dangerously calm one armed embrace.

"So surely you must know how I feel if anyone other than her or the brat interrupts my sake breaks?"

Shaking her head side-to-side she played dumb.

"Oh, come now Sakura. Weren't you the #1 book smart rookie of your graduating class? Well, let me enlighten you."

At this point, Tsunade picked Sakura up by the belt of her skirt with one hand while walking to the window, opening it with her free hand. With said hand free, she placed that upon her belted skirt as well. With one heave, Sakura was sent sailing at an inhumanly speed toward the North Gate of Konoha.

With one of the two doors splintered beyond simple repair, a lazy Shikamaru merely looks to his side to find a thoroughly unconscious Sakura with what appeared to be birds flying around her forehead. "Troublesome c" was all he could mutter before laying down again to stare at the clouds.

Ironically enough, of the handful of shinobi of leaf relieved at the short break of tension between the fall of a dangerous elemental nation and news of what could be the possible disbanding of an extremely dangerous organization, the one shinobi everyone expected to be the most excited at the reprieve was not celebrating at Ichiraku's, trying to break up Jiraiya's research, OR busting down the doors to Tsunade's office or even resting upon the 4th's head.

No, at this point we find our hero laying upon a high branch in training ground #44; known by most as the 'Forest of Death'.

With the fall of Sound and the threat of Akatsuki gone for the moment, Naruto had been granted access to missions; only within Fire Country though. Considering he was still a genin though, 90 of gennin missions were inside Fire anyways.

An also added bonus was that ANBU no longer shadowed him anymore.

Returning to our hero, we find him leisurely lying on a giant branch far from the ground with his forehead protector undone covering his eyes with his hands behind his head. One knee propped up he lay perfectly serene just taking in his surroundings without the use of his eyes. With the Kyuubi nearly a year away from being completely absorbed into himself, his other senses had been greatly enhanced over the past few years.

'Chirping cbirds. Scratching accompanied by climbing cwolverines. Leaves rustling below cSnakes. Silence csomeone's approaching. Can't even find solace in the Forest of Death I see. No need to get up. I probably know who it might be, just have to wait for their scent.'

500 meters behind

'My, what do we have here? A mere gennin encroaching upon my domain? That's foolish even for you, brat. Sleeping as well? Pfft, You even have your eyes covered. Well since he's here, I might as well have a little fun; I still remember that chuunin exam. I didn't really have to do that, but he was being the cocky loud mouth that I had been told of. Hahaha, the look on his face was priceless.'

She was immediately brought out her flashback from the far away voice of a boy. With his eyes still covered he began to speak.

"Well considering I killed the last one who smelled like this, I would have to assume it's you, Mitarashi-san?"

Slightly baffled at the fact she was discovered by a gennin at this range with his eyes covered, she still pressed on to tease the boy. Grabbing a kunai from her thigh holster she lobbed it quickly at the still prone Naruto.

Lifting his head and tilting his head slightly he caught the kunai in his teeth. Standing slowly he reattached his forehead protector barely restraining his locks with two spikes dropping to the side. Removing the kunai from his mouth he smiled with his trademarked grin.

"You know, I would have thought you'd aim for the other cheek this time."

Her jaw nearly dropped, but the infamous 'Anko-pride' refused to show any emotion at all. 'He caught that kunai in his teeth at that speed with his eyes covered?'

This pause in the action was all the distraction Naruto needed for him to appear behind her in a yellow flash and lightly slashed her right cheek forcing a drop of blood to appear at the corner of the slash. Leaning his head down from behind her, he slowly lapped up the trickle of blood from her cheek, sending shivers down her spine.

Her head swimming with thoughts, she had absolutely no idea how to react. How the HELL did he do that. I couldn't even see him move. How DARE he cut me! Little fucker, licking my blood 'Then again, never trick a trickster, he's older now, no surprise he wouldn't fall for the same trick twice. Still impressive though.'

She turned around to strike only to find him back in his spot of origin licking his lips, except this time he hadn't taken off his forehead protector.

"What do you think your doing, you little brat?"

Naruto simply rises up to lean against the trunk of the tree. "It's a free village and I just wanted to give you your kunai back, haha. You've got to admit you had that one coming. I've owed you for about 7 years now. I didn't know this was your part of the forest. If you don't mind I'll just head to the other side. Just trying to get away from the village without actually leaving the village, ya know?"

At this she calmed inside, she knew exactly what he was talking about, and being a prankster herself, she couldn't disagree with the logic. As for getting away from the village without leaving, she also desired it from time to time.

The Forest of Death was perfect for her. Quiet and no one around to bother you. Just the trees and nature. Regardless of the name, any ninja above a chuunin had absolutely nothing to fear from this place, unless you were an idiot.

"So what are you running away from?" Anko inquired.

"Are you running away from anything?" Naruto replied

"No, I just like the peace of the forest. I come here quite often. I'm quite protective of it as you just witnessed, err well sort of witnessed."

Naruto chuckled lightly, not insulting, just a jovial laugh meant purely to alleviate any remaining tension of the situation.

"Well, then we have one more thing in common Mitarashi-san. Pranksters and liar's through and through and were both outdoor people. I picked the whole nature thing up from Ero-Sennin. Tort- I mean training will do that to you when you're subject to his wrath."

"It's just Anko."

"Alright then, Anko-san."

"I SAID, it's just Anko."

"So be it."

With this he laid back down on the branch and once again covered his eyes.

Anko's eyes glowed as she prepared a pepper bomb considering kunai and shuriken made too much sound traveling through the air. As soon as she went to pull it out of her other holster, his voice returned.

"I would REALLY reconsider what your about to do, Anko."

At this point, he snaps his fingers.

"Who knows when that explosive note beneath your feet will fizzle out?"

She looked beneath her feet to see the note start to sizzle slowly. Before it blew, she leaf flickered away to watch her branch splinter and crash upon the forest floor.

For the second-time today she was dumbfounded. She kept replaying the questions again and again over in her head. Sensing her surprise and lack of response, he decided to answer her questions.

"I would have thought you learned earlier. I smelt you coming before you even knew I was here. That's how I knew it was you. The same applies for that pepper bomb you were about to hurl at me. Luckily for me, I can only smell them after someone takes them out of a pouch, other-wise I'd be pretty pissy all the time, I hate pepper."

She was seething on the outside, but inside she was smiling. 'This kid's just as much fun as the last time we were around each other. It seems I can't get anything by him. Smell? Must be that fox.'

He stood up, and re-tied his forehead protector.

"Now it's my turn to go on the offensive."

She barely had a moment to think before she saw that flash again. It almost looked like it went right through her.

Afterwards she quickly examines herself to find everything attached, pouches and all. Hell she even still had her hair tie on thinking he might try something with her hair. She looked everywhere for another explosive note and couldn't find a damn thing. Looking directly behind her she found Naruto crossing his arms across his chest with a cocky smirk on his face.

"What the hell did you just do?"

He points directly below her. She looked for something noticing only the branch. He sighs.

"Okay, how about the stream running below the branch your on."

"What's that got to with anything?"

He sighs once again. Maybe he is too fast for his own good. Then again, weights and a few choice scrolls from your father make it pretty damn easy.

"It has everything to do with what I just did." After saying this, he pulls out what appeared to be a dry brush and waves it back and forth slowly so she can see what it is.

Still slightly in the dark, she thinks for a moment before a bulb clicked in her brain. 'Oh, he better hope that he didn't do what I think he just did.' Guaranteed to get to bottom of this, she hops off the branch landing gracefully and begins her silent trek to the stream. She opens her eyes and looks down into the stream to confirm exactly what she was thinking.

He had painted on her face. On one cheek there was a rather expertly drawn fox head with the tongue sticking out in a playful pattern. On the opposing cheek there was a beautiful snake. Only problem with the snake was that it was using its tail to hold down one of its eyelids while its tongue was stuck out. To make matters worse, on her forehead there was a rather hastily drawn 'Naruto was here.'

He could barely contain his laughter knowing she had just seen it as he says, "You'll have to excuse the sloppiness on my signature, but I was trying to make sure I could get out of Dodge without you noticing."

The killing intent was literally pouring out of her at this point. After quickly washing off all the ink on her face. She stood back up and without missing a beat she leapt up brandishing a kunai heading directly towards him.

"Well I guess I should have expected this, but come on, you've got to admit that was pretty damn funny." He said bounding from tree to tree, tears nearly falling from his eyes.

She was too pissed off at this point to notice he was holding his sides trying to contain the laughter.

"You think that was funny? Wait till I catch your sorry ass and string you up by only your balls!"

Shuttering at the thought he decided laughing could wait until later when she calmed down and he was a safe distance away. Still he couldn't help but giggle a little from time to time as he was still having to jump from tree to tree to avoid the snake woman's wrath.

"Oh calm down a little, I would have thought you'd at least laughed a little too."

She had to admit it was damn funny, and in all fairness it's not like it was graffiti. It was more along the lines of body art, minus the stupid signature on her forehead. She had started to calm down a little but still wanted to chase, it was great exercise and she hasn't had this much fun in a long time, so the pursuit continued.

"Oh, I have calmed down. I just want to chase you now. You know, a little game of catch the gennin?"

This struck a little peeved nerve on him. Taking down Akatsuki members, dismantling Sound and he was STILL a gennin. All things considered though, it's not like he went out his was way to complain about it. He'd have to find a way to fix this annoyance. Snapping back to his senses for the time beginning, he had a much better name.

"I'd say it's much more along the lines of cat and mouse; or in our case, snake and fox."

She laughed a little at that one. She put the kunai away and sped up just intent on catching him at this point.

"So snake and fox it is then, brat."

Paying attention to her speed he kicked it up a notch so he could keep the constant amount of distance away from her he had in the beginning of their game. Cockily he turned around looking at her as she jumped from tree to tree almost looking like an animal on all fours.

"Come on now Anko, aren't you going to even TRY to catch me. Poor little gennin like me should be easy pickin's for you."

Even after she sped up she was still at the same distance she was before. The same distance even after he put his back towards the trees to mock her. He was making sport of her and she knew it. This kid was out running her in her own forest. Putting as much chakra in her feet as she could, she drastically upped her speed to catch the cocky fox.

She smiled evilly. "Watch yourself, punk. How much fun would this be if I caught you right away? I like to stalk my prey."

He knew she was bluffing, he could tell by the amount of chakra she was putting in her feet. This was her max and he knew it, which he had to admit was really fast. It was just unfortunate that he was A LOT faster. Turning his back towards her again, he leapt back to that SAME amount of distance he kept. Mocking fear he said.

"Oh no, I'll just have to see if I have it in me to get away before your done stalking this poor gennin."

There he was again, at that SAME damn distance even after she reached her max speed, and it still only looked like he was skipping like a school-girl throughout the forest. She started closing in not even caring if he was letting her, which he was. As soon as she jumped to grab him that same DAMN flash appeared. Right in front of her face this time, almost blinding her as he disappeared.

Several hundred meters ahead, he almost had to yell so she could hear him. Chuckling a little he spoke.

"Guess I found it in me to get away. I win." With that he left in yellow again except to the opposite side of the forest.

Once she knew he was gone, she started panting heavily while placing her palms on her knees bending over slightly. Taking one hand to wipe the layer of sweat that had coated her forehead she thought.

'What the hell? How the fuck was he moving that fast? He wasn't even panting! What's worse is that I'm pretty sure he even let me catch up just so he could hirashin out of my range. God, I haven't had to run that fast in years, and when I was, I caught the coward within a minute or two. I lost track how long we've been running. Holy shit! The sun's already setting, It had to be about noon when I showed up. 7 hours? He wasn't even panting and made sport of me. There's more to this kid then I thought. Sure, I've heard the stories and believed them, but seeing and hearing are two completely different things.'

"Sorry to break you out of your train of thought, Anko, but it's starting to get late. I figured you might want to get out of our little playground. You look pretty beat up."

She snapped up and took a look behind her to find Naruto standing there. She had never even sensed him, let alone realized when he had got behind her. She did the only thing natural to her and took swing at him. He dodged only to see snakes fly out of her sleeves coming to grab him. In a flash, he was behind her with a kunai to her throat. Her eyes widened and she didn't move feeling the cold steel against her neck.

With a dead serious low voice he speaks.

"Do me a favor, Mitarashi. Unless we are sparring or actually fighting each other, I would prefer you not use that technique."

He pulled the kunai from her throat and backed up. She froze for a second and was glad that he was behind her so he couldn't see the look on her face. She hadn't felt this threatened in as long as she could remember. Ironically enough for this particular circumstance, it hit her like a ton of bricks. It had been almost 7 years in this exact same forest when she tried to intimidate Orochimaru to leave before the rest of her ANBU arrived.

With these facts she understood why Naruto had snapped so suddenly at her after they had just been having fun like kids.

Naruto had to kill his first friend who had been possessed by her former teacher turned traitor making the next few years of her life a living hell. He had tried for years to bring him back before Sasuke had been taken over, his will power finally being taken over by Orochimaru releasing him of his cage inside the back of Sasuke's mind.

She had been out of Fire that day due to an infiltration and interrogation mission with a squad of ANBU, but she had heard of their final duel and she had to assume he had seen that attack at least once coming from his own best friend.

If she had to guess though, he had probably seen it many more times in the handful of altercations they had in other retrieval missions, that she had heard that he had commissioned and paid for himself before Sasuke had completely lost himself to Orochimaru and decided to try and take over Leaf again with Sound forces.

Before she could attempt an apology, which to anyone who knew Anko, would be akin to Kakashi burning his Icha Icha books. She turned slowly only to find a very faint trail of yellow in the distance.

With a sincere and somber look on her face, she stared at the branch below her and whispered "I'm sorry, Naruto" before she herself left in a swirl of leaves.

Unknown to either of them, Jiraiya had been there almost the entire time of the chase after sensing Naruto's unique hiraishin from the hot springs, only never moving to track them after seeing it was merely a game between the two. Using his 'Pervert peeping no jutsu', it was impossible to see or sense him without knowing the origin of the person (which is why he thought Naruto couldn't sense or smell him). He sighed heavily and he too left in a swirl of leaves trying to figure out how he could talk to his apprentice without letting him know he was there listening.

The next day went by without any commotion. Naruto had gotten up from his bed still wearing that ridiculous looking cap, though stretched slightly as over the years he had outgrown it, however he always wore it to this day when he was home. Shedding his clothes, he hopped into the shower to wash himself for the day. He returned to his room/apartment and threw his clothes on quickly before he disappeared on a road of yellow and black to show up outside the Hokage's office.

Bursting through the doors as only Naruto could he greeted Tsunade.

"Good morning baa-chan!"

Needless to say Tsunade almost face-faulted after she had her first cocked up to strike her son in the face for calling him Grandma. She quickly regained her composure.

"Good morning Naruto. To what do I owe the pleasure?" she replied with sarcasm.

"I want to take the chuunin exams this week. I know what you're going to say, so I'll just answer myself." She recoiled a bit in her chair. "I won't bug you to take higher class missions, but I still want the title." She sat still recoiled wondering. He never cared about titles. "I can fool everyone with my clones, so I'll just henge them into random people. I won't tell you what I plan to do, I know you can't interfere when it comes to exams as not to show favorites." Thoughts clouded her mind as to what to do. "I'm going to assume the exams this year in Konoha will be the same as they were the last time, I'll just let you know I have a plan, and after it's over, the feudal lords will have no choice but promote me. This will help the village considerably and increase our funds. So just let me have this, it's a win-win situation whether you know what I'm doing or not." She silently contemplates this.

"Okay, Naruto, I will allow it only because all your friends are chuunin/jounin already, and the other leaf teams taking the chuunin exams are already formed and you technically can't enter this time according to our village's rules. Just make sure you handle this carefully, I'm actually glad you wont tell me what your planning, because if I didn't look like I was surprised, you'd be screwed. Just sign the form here and 2 other signatures. You know how we do it here, so obviously I have nothing to tell you."

Naruto is later found in Ichiraku's having 5 bowls of miso and a porcelain dish of sake.

"Ero-sennin, I know your there."

Not surprised at all, Jiraiya pulls up a stool next to Naruto and asks for dish of sake as well.

"I'm not sure why you're taking that stupid exam, I'm pretty sure you could skip it and go straight for Jounin."

"I know, but this seems more fun. Plus, the Jounin test is easy, each country holds their own when they get a certain number requests, I'm pretty sure I can talk obaa-chan into giving me one, just for myself after a week, as long I agree to keep doing missions that don't involve leaving Fire, despite me having the right to do so."

Jiraiya couldn't deny his logic. He had no doubt of Naruto's skill, knowing he didn't need him around him to save his ass. In fact, even with his Sage status he was still stronger than him. His willingness to accept status without privilege didn't surprise him at all. He knew why, and was glad to hear that there was no malice in his voice as he thought there might be.

"Well, I can't argue with that logic at all, Naruto. Just make sure you don't make a spectacle of yourself."

Naruto smiled his cheeky fox grin.

"No problem, Jiraiya-sensei"

Jiraiya shuddered at the exclamation. Despite the fact that he had always disliked his title to Naruto, he had come to accept it a long time ago, just as Tsunade did hers as well. What worried him was that whenever Naruto called him 'Jiraiya-sensei', something bad was about to happen. Little did he know how bad it was going to be.

Later that week:

Naruto and two other people had walked immediately past the fake sentries to the 3rd floor. Propping his feet on the desk, he waited for the rest of the seats to fill before Ibiki came in and explained the rules of the test. To this day Naruto still had no clue what the answers to the test were except for one, which he knew would be enough. His clones made no movement.

Ibiki picked up on Naruto only writing for a moment before replacing his feet while the rest of his 'team' did nothing. Sighing he had figured out what the situation was. After the 10th question was handed out a lot of the teams had left. With only 10 teams left, plus Naruto's 'team'. Ibiki was thankful that Naruto hadn't performed his last speech, thus lowering the numbers. Unfortunately after he sighed c.

BOOM! Once again Mitarashi Anko unceremoniously burst through the window before once again pinning her banner on the roof.

"Only 11 teams this year, eh Ibiki? Not bad. Bitches, meet me at training ground 44 in an hour or you FAIL." She laughed evilly then disappeared in a swirl of leaves.

Naruto waited before every candidate left, when Ibiki spoke.

"You know, technically you can't do this Naruto?"

One of the clones spoke up

"What ever could you be talking about Ibiki-sensei?"

Before he could sigh all of them had disappeared in a yellow flash to the Forest of Death.

Naruto arrived before any other team was close. Hell, he was even there before Anko appeared from the leaves. She looked him in the eyes with slightly suppressed amazement.

"I thought I saw you in there. What's the deal? I don't know for sure, but you probably could have skipped this."

He smiled.

"Where's the fun in that, Anko?"

She couldn't help but muster a smile as well.

"True. This is a rather good class, sure you can keep up, gennin?"

He laughed loudly, wiping a single tear from his eye.

"I guess we'll just have to see, right?"

"Don't think I don't know about your 'team', just try not to kill anyone. You know how much I hate paperwork." She smiled sheepishly.

After they talked for another good 30 minutes, the teams started shuffling in, all 10 accounted for.

Naruto mouthed to Anko. 'How about one more for good time's sake?'

She nodded. At this point, Naruto started to act out by putting his hands behind his head and started mocking the whole test.

"Let's just hurry this up already, I'm getting tired of this."

All of the while his 'team' was 'warning' him. At this point Anko threw a kunai precisely past his face into a rock slicing his cheek slightly. Anko appeared behind Naruto and stood up on her tippy-toes and licked his cheek sadistically creeping out most of the other teams while Naruto's 'team' was shouting at him for being such a loud mouth.

"Okay, now that this idiot has shut up, let's get down to the rules. Everyone sign this waiver before we continue, it's a death waiver. From now on, killing is allowed. Once your whole team signs the waiver you will receive either an 'Earth' or 'Heaven' scroll. Your task is simple. To pass the test you must get the opposite scroll from a team that has it. You cannot open the scrolls until you reach the tower in the middle of the forest approximately 10 km from every gate your teams will be positioned at. Any team that shows up without all 3 will be disqualified regardless of scrolls or not. Every team will receive a scroll behind this curtain for secrecy reasons."

Approximately 10 minutes later

"Alright, now that every team has received a scroll, proceed to your designated gate, and when the signal is given, enter the forest. You have 5 days to complete this mission and once you enter, you cannot exit until the time limit expires. Oh and one last warning cDON'T DIE!"

Naruto yawned and his 'team' proceeded to their gate on the other side of forest. The green light beamed, all the gates slammed open and each team flew into the Forest of Death.

2 Hours Later

Naruto and his 'team' show up on one of the entrances and open their scrolls. Once again Iruka shows up.

"So you decided on taking the long way I see. Then again I get summoned in 2 hours doesn't seem like very long. Good job Naruto."

After he says his thanks and is prepared to leave he looked back to Naruto and his pouches to find 10 other scrolls. His eyes widen and he looks Naruto square in the face while pointing at his pouches

"You didn't do what I think you, did you?"

Naruto puts his hand behind his head and smiles.


"I don't even want to know." And he poof's away.

Inside the tower with Tsunade, Anko and Genma 1 hours 30 minutes earlier

Tsunade sighs. "You have got to be kidding me, he wouldn't."

Genma coughs. "Hokage-sama, what's he doing?"

Anko merely shrugs. "He's taking a nap."

Present time

Naruto shows up at the mini-stadium between the small balconies with his 'team'. After arriving in the room he drops his scroll along with 10 others. He leans up against a wall getting ready to take a nap as the Hokage and 2 Jounin arrive in a swirl of leaves.

"What did you just do?" Tsunade asks.

"Oh come on, Hokage-sama, my 'team' and I just want to cool down for a while" as his team starts to fake pant.

All 3 sweat-drop

Tsunade speaks. "You do realize you will have to fight those two in the finals, right?"

"Of course. Regardless of the draw, it will be me who wins."

Genma coughs.

"You know, you didn't have to take EVERYBODY's scroll, right?"

"I didn't?"

Queue up the all-knowing sweat-drop

"Don't worry, none of them are dead. Don't get me wrong, a lot of people's pride died today, but they didn't. They'll all be out for a day or two and spend the rest of time running around like rabbits trying to find scrolls. I might just go back out to watch for fun."

Everyone face-faults. Tsunade speaks up.

"Naruto, you will not leave this tower, and you are restricted from watching the camera's as well, consider this your punishment for your arrogance."

4 Days 22 Hours Later

Naruto and his 'team' is obviously the only one left. No one even bothers to explain the rules.

1 Month Later

"Winner: Uzumaki Naruto"

Naruto strolls into Tsunade's office with a cheesy smile. Tsunade sighs and grumbles.

"You know, on principle alone, I shouldn't give you this. I'm glad you didn't tell me what you were going to do, because I would have hammered you to the North Gate. That being said, here ya go. You've deserved this for 6 years."

Naruto chuckles lightly.

"When can you arrange my Jounin test?"

Tsunade sweatdrops

"Going right for the gusto I see. Can't say that I blame you. Wait until Kakashi comes back from his mission and he will give you your test."

Extremely satisfied with this answer he begins to leave the office when Jiraiya jumps up and sits on the windowsill by Tsunade.

"That's not a good idea, Tsunade."

Naruto face faults after grabbing the doorknob.

"Shut up, Jiraiya-sensei."

Tsunade goes slack jawed. He just called Jiraiya his sensei.

"What are you trying to say, Jiraiya?"

Naruto knows where this is going and begins to glare daggers at Jiraiya.

"I was just saying it wouldn't be a good idea to have Kakashi test Naruto."

Tsunade obviously not grasping the situation begins to lay into Jiraiya.

"Listen, Kakashi has handled countless Jounin tests, and if Naruto can't go toe-to-toe with Kakashi for a while, he doesn't deserve to be a Jounin. I'm sorry to say that Naruto."

Naruto sweatdrops knowing Jiraiya can't keep his mouth shut up at this point now that Tsunade started it. He wasn't going to be happy about this one.

"Listen, I'm just saying don't put him against JU-"

"What? Spit it out! What'd happen, I know Naruto can stand up to him for a while!"

"If you do that Tsunade, your not going to be happy, trust me."

"Listen! I have faith in Naruto, he can take care of himself."

At this point Naruto intervenes.

"You know, your right Hokage-sama, I think I can stand up to him for a while. Thank you, just let me know when he's back and healthy, and we can get this all over with."

Tsunade, for the second time today dropped her jaw. He called her the Hokage.

"STOP, Naruto." Effectively stopping his retreat from the office.

He stops while she looks at Jiraiya seriously.

"Jiraiya. Speak. Now."

He shruggs his shoulders.

"Long story short. If you put him up against ONLY c"

"Come on sensei." Naruto pleads

"Naruto, shut up." Naruto sighs

"What Jiraiya?" She returns to glaring.

"He would wipe the floor with him cliterally. He'll be using that spiky silver hair to sweep up the training ground. You'd be lucky to have him out of the hospital in a week. If you don't believe me, ask Kakashi when he get's back. Gather up the best you got, because you're going to need it to test him."

Naruto sighs and shrugs his shoulders.

"You know, ero-sennin you could have made this a lot easier if you just would have shut up. I wouldn't have hurt him, I would have just knocked him out."

Jiraiya starts laughing while Tsunade rubs her temples.

"You've got to be kidding me, right?"

Jiraiya keeps laughing.

"You know when Sakura, Kakashi, Naruto and myself returned from killing off Zetsu and Konan?"

She nods her head.

"Well, Sakura doesn't know because she was sent to watch the entrance of the cave. We all got ready to fight when Naruto threw up his hand and told us to watch. Watching is just what we did. We watched, all three of us walked out, myself and Kakashi merely sweeping off some dust from sitting while Naruto walked out with a few, keyword, few papercuts from Konan. I'm not even exactly sure what he did, neither does Kakashi, we couldn't see anything except damage to the cave. When we got out, Sakura punched Naruto on the head for getting hurt."

"Dammit, ero-sennin, you didn't have to tell the WHOLE goddamn story."

All Tsunade could do was sit there with her eyes wide. She immediately opened the secret Hokage drawer and began to chug the nectar of the gods.

Naruto sighed.

"So do you think I can just get my jacket now then, baa-chan?" He asked hopefully.

Now it was Tsunade's turn to laugh.

"HAHAHA! Not a chance in hell, brat. As far as I'm considered you just bought yourself a one-way ticket to fighting us."

Naruto shook his head side-to-side.

"Not going to happen."

Both Sannin looked at him confused.

"I refuse to fight either of you."

Tsunade rubbed her temples while thinking for a while. Inspiration struck.

"Alright then, if you want your jacket and don't want to fight us, you get to pick 5 jounin yourself to fight. If what he says is true it's still not very fair in my opinion, but if you don't want to fight us, I'll respect that choice. You have one week to decide."

Naruto shook his head.

"No need. Maito Guy, Yuuhi Kurenai, Mitarashi Anko, Hatake Kakashi and Sarutobi Asuma, battle royale."

Jiraiya just shrugged while Tsunade's eyes popped out of her head.

"Those are not your typical jounin, they're our elite, battle royale no less? Well you're just lucky that the promotion isn't based just on victory. You've got your work cut out for you, brat. I'll deliver the invitations personally. You've got a week."

Naruto raised a finger.

"If you don't mind, I'd like to give Anko hers personally. I have my reasons."

Tsunade shrugged and agreed as Naruto took it and rode a trail of yellow back to his apartment to take a shower and get a good night's rest.

Back at the Tower

"Any reason why he wants to give Anko hers?"

"I think he wants to apologize for something he did a while ago."

"And that would be?"

"Awhile back, the two of them were pretty much goofing off in the Forest of Death as only the two of them could, her chasing him with a kunai ready to slice him up. Once Anko tired out, Naruto waited a while and showed back up to tell her she should probably go home. Anko was surprised and went to hit him. When he dodged, she sent her snakes after him."

Tsunade shot her eyes wide open knowing exactly where this was going.

"He shot around her in the blink of an eye, kunai pressed against her throat threatening to never use that technique around him unless they were actually fighting seriously. Anko was scared; literally scared for the first time I've seen since I met her. I'm pretty sure she pieced one and one together and turned to apologize, but he was already long gone."

Tsunade lowered her head with a sad look on her face.

"Did he pick her to ki c?"

He shook his head quickly and replied before she continued.

"I'm pretty sure he didn't. After that encounter, they never talked about it again, since they've still been 'playing' almost every day in the Forest since then. Hell, he even let her cut him again at the chuunin exams. He mouthed the suggestion to her while they were both smiling. He enjoyed intimidating them as much as she did."

Okay, now she was confused.

"Then why would he request her personally for this exam knowing full well that he was going to have to take her out?"

Jiraiya shrugged.

"Now that, I have no idea. I'll try to pry it out of him, but him knowing me for so long, he can hide his reasons pretty easy if he wants to. Do you want me to spy on him?"

"You know you can't sneak up on me anymore, ero-sennin. I knew you were there. You were the reason I calmed down."

They both wheeled around to the window.

"That's a perfect sneaking or peeping jutsu, but I've seen it so many times over the years, I'd expect you to think more of me by now. I'm the ONLY person who can find that technique; of this I'm sure. You know how much I loved breaking up your 'research'. How else could you explain me always pranking you? I cost you a lot of money over the years, delaying your releases for a while. I don't regret it though, you always used to take gama-chan away from me in my sleep anyways. Hahaha"

A vein appeared on Tsunade's temple while Jiraiya appeared to be crying.

"Well, I guess I should thank you on behalf of women everywhere, Naruto."

She shoots a glare at the sobbing Jiraiya

"My own student! My own student!" he repeated this mantra while still overflowing with tears.

"Well, back to business. Why would you pick Anko out of all the rest of the jounin, then?"

He shrugs.

"I don't know. I felt like it?"

Queue the face fault. Attempting to get back up with some grace, she straightens out her coat while sitting back down.

"Well, it is your choice. One week then, you'll be informed of the time. Take the time to train or 'play' as Jiraiya has so eloquently put it. Dismissed."


Next Day: Mid-day, Forest of Death

"You know, I think your actually making me a bit faster, brat"

Naruto laughs.

"Maybe, maybe not. It's not like I can tell." Purposely pressing her buttons.

She starts to growl.

"How would you like to come watch my jounin test, Anko?"

"I don't have time to waste sitting on the sidelines watching your ass getting handed to you." She chuckles.

Insert foxy grin. Suddenly, before she could even see him reach for his pouch, a kunai lands at her feet with an envelope between the blade.

"My, my, who said anything about the sidelines?"

Confused she picks up the kunai with the envelope. Opening the envelope, she begins to read the note.

"Mitarashi Anko, Elite Jounin of the ANBU torture and interrogation Department, your name has been submitted to test Uzumaki Naruto in his jounin exam. With you will be Hatake Kakashi, Yuuhi Kurenai, Maito Gai and Sarutobi Asuma in a battle royale to be held in the stadium a week from the date stated. Rules are the same as any challenge or refereed battle."


Tsunade and Jiraiya of the Sannin

At this, she begins to laugh uncontrollably with a tear starting to form in her right eye.

"Kid, you just signed your own death warrant, this I won't miss for the world. Would you like to keep playing snake and fox or would you like to go pick out your coffin?"

He crosses his arms across his chest and smiles.

"I don't plan on dying yet, just make sure to take it easy on the little chuunin. Shall we continue?"

Nodding the pursuit begins once again leading into the night much like it has been for the past few weeks.

Later that night at the local Dango restaurant.

Much like it has been in the past, most jounins show up to either talk about missions, enjoy some dango and sake, and socialize amongst themselves in the self appointed 'Ninja Lounge' area in the back. Five elite jounin show up at random intervals filling their common booth. Anko shows up last taking the end cushion covered in dried sweat while ordering a bottle of sake.

"Another game of snake and fox I see, Anko." Kurenai states.

"Yeah that brat sure makes my playground a lot more fun these days."

"I haven't seen you happy like this in a while, Anko. You and 'fox' got something going out that we don't know about?" Asuma states lauging.

"Please, ANBU has been slow for quite a while now, and the kid keeps me on my toes. Oh you guys will never believe this. Check this prank the punk gave me earlier." She tosses the note on the center of the table.

Most of the table recognizes the note without even looking at it. Kakashi goes wide 'eye' immediately remembering when he got his.

"Yeah, I don't know what the hell Tsunade-sama is thinking. I heard that he even requested all of us and decided on the 5 on 1. I know he's always been cocky, but this seems even out of his own normal attitude." Kurenai says. They all let out a hearty laugh at his expense; that is cexcept Kakashi.

"Well nobody said we had to go all out on him, he deserves the jacket after all these years and what he's done for this village." ?Asuma

At this point Kakashi intervenes.

"If I were you, I would seriously reconsider what you are all thinking. That laughing will end up putting you all in the hospital. Trust me." He says without a shade of humor in his voice.

"Look, we all know he took out Sasuke by himself, a great feat in itself. The five of us at the same time against him is rather unfair if you ask me. He's horrible at genjutsu and he'll be taking on two close-range fighters, a ninjutsu expert, and an ANBU of the torture division, well rounded in every type of combat. He'll get his jacket for sure, that I can guarantee. He's an excellent fighter, no doubt. Aren't you getting a little worked up, Kakashi?" Anko says.

Kakashi ignoring the question merely stares stoically at the note. Luckily for himself despite the oncoming punishment, a certain man decides to break; no, shatter the silence.


Still staring at the note. Kakashi can barely make out Gai's outburst.



"Well, I'm going to go home and get some rest. I've got a lot of work to do if I plan on using my Sharingan for a long time."

He stands up, drops a few bills on the table, says goodnight to everyone and disappears in a swirl of leaves. Arriving at his apartment he thinks to himself 'He'll probably go for Kurenai first, to this day he still sucks at genjutsu. I need to work this week to get my stamina up, as long as she can tie him up for a few seconds, we MIGHT be able to slow him down after a while. We are SO screwed. They're a bunch of idiots. Well can't say I didn't warn them. He's going to end up going easy on US, not what they're thinking.'

A week later at the stadium

(Stadium is empty minus the fighters in the center. No need for an audience for a Jounin Exam since they're all held in their own countries)

'Well they sure all look pretty smug. Guess I'll have to fix that. If I know Kakashi, he's going to think I'm going after Kurenai first. While it's a wise decision, I can just pulse out of anything she's got planned, however I can't afford to let Kakashi get any jutsu started. I'm pretty sure he would have warned them by now. Apparently they didn't take it to heart, bad idea. I'll have to stun them first and just knock Kakashi out, he's the only one that might be a pain in the ass, cause I KNOW he'll join in with at least one other person. Maybe I should have fought Jiraiya and Tsunade, this IS going to be too easy.'

Forming a star shaped formation not far from the outer rims of the arena while Naruto stands directly in the center, Tsunade speaks.

"We are gathered here today for Naruto's jounin exam. At his request all 5 of you have been gathered for a battle royale, or 5 on 1. I wish you luck Naruto, you're going to need it." Behind Tsunade, Jiraiya starts to silently laugh.

'Those fools have no idea what they're in store for. Kakashi is the only one who looks even remotely intimidated. They better learn quickly, because he's going to take out at least one of them before he gets started. This is going to be fun.'

At this point, each of them had various thoughts running through their minds. (One guess as to which all of them are.)

'Just go after Kurenai, then I can get Guy to distract you.'

'I'll give him credit for his guts, so he'll get the pleasure of one of my higher genjutsu, then the others can pick him off. Sorry Naruto'

'I know your wind just like me Naruto, you'll have both your hands tied up with my knives, then one of the others can get behind you. If Kurenai-chan gets you, it's game over.'


'You're fast kid, I'll give you that, but against all of us it's not going to matter. Plus I'm using my snakes no matter what, I know you don't care anymore and I'm glad we've never talked about it again. Apologies are not my forte. Get ready kid, this is going to be one hell of a day. Luckily for you, it won't take long for you to wake up.'

Tsunade yells.


Before anyone could move Naruto immediately shrunk to his knees with his fists by his waist and wind started whipping around the arena at a very fast rate while he was being basked in what appeared to be a white light. Slowly the light got higher and higher, and the wind kept building around the arena causing everyone in the arena, even Jiraiya and Tsunade to cover their eyes.


One thought alone amongst everyone.

'What is this? It's not his chakra spiking, in fact I can't feel anything past his signature right now.'

Jiraiya thought he knew what was going on. Naruto had once told him that he could gain higher control of his wind by gathering it around him. He never knew he could do it without chakra though. He had dismissed it as a parlor trick. That is, until now.

'Shit kid, how much of you not shown me?'

'Just a little more, okay good.'

And just like that the wind had died down, the trees had stopped whipping around, the rocks had dropped back down on the ground. Still dropped down on his knees, before anyone could make a move he shouted while holding out his hands in either direction.


And at that exact moment a gigantic stream of wind had exploded around him in every single direction blowing everyone up against the outer rim making small craters of the bodies of all the jounin. Immediately after that, Naruto taking advantage of his slight dizziness punched Kakashi right below the rib cage, hard. A sudden knocked out Kakashi was flung into the Kage box with Tsunade and Jiraiya.

"Take care of him, Jiraiya. I don't want him down here when things get started. He's going to be out for a LONG time, and he might get hurt."

"You got it, kid. Now get back to work."

The others had finally got back to their feet regaining the bearings. While the others were still trying to find out what happened, Kurenai had different plans.

'Shit. He's too fast, I've got to snatch him now'

She gathered as much chakra as she could and announced before Naruto turned back around, he found himself in the 9th circle of hell.

'Damn, guess she caught up pretty quick. I don't have time to play with her'

Spiking a huge amount of chakra, he dispelled the illusion much to Kurenai's dismay he appeared behind her and kicked her in the back right into a charging Asuma. Having no choice but to pocket his trench knives he didn't have time to catch her and received the entire brunt of the force of Naruto's kick to Kurenai slamming him back into the same wall he had just crawled out of. Grunting and laying down a barely conscious Kurenai, he started his charge again full speed bearing his trench knives again. At this point the other two became increasingly aware of what they just got themselves into.

'Should have listened to Kakashi, dammit.'

Watching Asuma advance, he became acutely aware of a blur out of the corner of his eyes. Disappearing in a flash to the other side of the arena, he smacked Kurenai on the back of her neck while seeing the huge crater Gai created and Asuma digging his hands and knives out of the concrete wall. Sighing, he had to roll to avoid dozens of snakes leaping out of the ground to catch him.

'Okay, now the action is starting to pick up, better lay Kurenai up'

After dodging the snakes for what seemed like forever, he flung Kurenai up into the Kage's box and Tsunade caught her after punching Jiraiya in the face.

Now things were beginning to get complicated. He couldn't take down Anko because he had always planned on leaving her last from the very beginning of the selection of his opponents. Guy had started flickering around him trying to land a hit while Asuma was circling the outside of him waiting for Naruto to try and escape Gai's whirlwind. As all this was going on, he was still having to dodge snakes from underground showing up at random spots with no pattern time-wise.

'Okay, time to stop playing'

Powering up a rasengan, he slammed it directly into the ground beneath him, destroying the snakes and throwing up a massive amount of earth and dust. Using a seal less shadow clone, he henge'd the real him into a rock and began his assault on Asuma while he had already masked his chakra from the real him in the rock. As he was fighting Asuma, he started parrying and backing up signaling that he was starting to lose leverage. At this point, Asuma jumped back and Gai flew into Naruto's clone screaming "DYNAMIC ENTRY." 'Naruto' bumped, rolled and skid across the stadium ground. Just as the clone hit the wall, Asuma felt a giant spike of chakra behind him as the clone on the other side went POOF and the source of the spike went POOF as well showing Naruto barely covered in the smoke with his fist cocked back. Before he could even attempt to block, Asuma was on the receiving end of a jaw shattering punch. He rocketed at the wall at an extreme pace and crashed into it creating a giant crater and several cracks. He slid down the wall slowly while coughing up a little blood and falling to his slide, completely spent.

'You have GOT to be kidding me.' Tsunade thought with her jaw wide open.

'Geeez kid, stop enjoying yourself and end this. I've got research to do.'

Naruto disappeared in flash to avoid Guy and also get Asuma out of the arena, yet someone had picked up on this pattern of gathering opponents and had several underground snakes waiting for him when he arrived. As he reached down to slice himself free from the damnable snakes he received a fully extended right fist to the face, courtesy of Guy's 'Iron Fist' style. Guy's eyes went wide when all he saw was Naruto's face slightly bent backward. He gently raised his head back to it's original spot and then Naruto grabbed Guy's wrist with his right hand while wiping a single drop of blood from his nose with his left sleeve.

"That stung, Guy."

Not even having the time to try and pry his wrist from his grip, Naruto took his left hand and attached it to the same wrist and he swung Gai above his head once and then proceeded to slam his body into the ground leaving a gigantic crater where Guy lay beaten and most likely broken in some places. Slicing himself free from the snakes, he shouldered Guy and Asuma and once again threw them back up into the Kage's box each being caught by Tsunade and Jiraiya.

"Well it seems it's just the two of us now, Anko."

Anko had no idea what to believe at this point in the fight. She had watched him single-handedly take out every other single person with ease only receiving one hit from Guy after she finally managed to catch his ankles. Even with that hit, he didn't even flinch, it just knocked his head back a few inches not breaking a bone, just drawing a single trickle of blood. Her head was flooded with thoughts.

'How in the hell is this happening? He's hasn't even been moving at the speed he usually shows me in our playground.'

She steeled her resolve.

"I have to admit kid, you've definitely impressed me. I guess you won't need that casket anytime soon. Care to tell me why you haven't even been moving as fast as you normally do when you like to lap me in the Forest of Death?"

Tsunade face faulted while in the middle of trying to fix everyone in the box.

"What does she mean, Jiraiya?"

He smiled smugly.

"I tried to tell you it wouldn't be fair, but you refused to listen to me. The kid's a lot faster then he's been moving today. He probably knocked Kakashi out first so he couldn't rally the others. The 5 of them might have been able to touch him. Just dumb luck that Guy hit him, if he hadn't been so worried about getting everyone out of there when he was done with them, Anko would have never known where to try and get him, and even then it took her 3 tries to actually get him. Sometimes the kid's just too nice, what can I say?"

Tsunade sweat-dropped

"So what's he going to do now? If I didn't know any better, I'd say he was saving her for last on purpose."

He simply shrugs.

"That's what it looks like to me. He probably just wants to talk now. The infamous 'Naruto speech jutsu'."

Tsunade knew that one all too well. Still amazes her that a kid managed to bring her back to Konoha.

"Care to make a bet, Anko?"

Confused at this point considering the action had COMPLETELY stopped. She just nods.

"Why the hell not, kid. Sure."

He gives her a genuine smile, not a smirk, not a grin, but a genuine smile

"I've been working on a present for you for quite a while now. If you beat me by any means you deem necessary, I'll give you the present."

She was about to interrupt when he continued.

"However, if I can make you submit with no hits, no jutsus, no weapons, nothing of a dangerous nature at all. You still get the present, but you have to let me take you out after I get my jacket. It's a win-win situation, what do you say?"

She thought about it for about a millisecond, however in her head it was more like hours. 'A present, huh? I've never been much of a present person, so I could really give a shit. However I'm still somewhat interested, he's being all mysterious about it and I can't help but feel a little intrigued by the proposal. The only problem is that if HE wins, I have to go out on a date with him :shudders:. Then again, it couldn't be that bad, we're both pranksters, enjoy a good laugh and I have to admit life has been a lot more fun since we started playing in the forest. It seems to be his favorite place now, too. I've never been that much older then he is. He's 18 and I'm only 24. Creeping those kids out before the last test was a lot of fun too, especially since he suggested it. I would have laughed when he showed up at the tower with everybody else's scrolls if it wasn't for the fact that Tsunade was standing right beside me. Even after he blew up on me about the snakes, the next day he just shrugged it off like it was nothing. I'd be lying if I said we weren't getting closer. I can't do it, though; I would catch so much shit from the rest of them if I did. It's not like I don't have dirt on them though. That and the fact that Naruto severely decimated them today like it was nothing at all to him is going to be great fodder against them for a LONG time. Wait a minute che left me for last on purpose. He knocked them all out and sent them up into the box unconscious, bruised and battered after thoroughly embarrassing them in front of everyone until it came down to me. He's smarter than I thought. Just like a fox, haha. Well then what the hell, I don't care what they think and we've both got dirt on them for a long time.'

"Fine, brat. But just don't think because you aren't going to do anything deadly, that I won't." She smiled a genuine smile back. In reality she knew this was only going to last as long as he wanted it to, but she wasn't giving up her pride because she knew was going to lose.

"That's one of the things I like about you, Anko." He smiled.

Startled she got back up from her serpent stance.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean, brat?" Now she was confused.

"You're tough, real tough. You're not the flower; you're the thorn. You're not silk, you're sandpaper. But most importantly to me; you're not a snake, you're a deadly woman."

If she weren't used to having to be such a sadistic badass all these years, she probably would have blushed. No one has ever said anything like that to her before. She had a glazed over look on her face for a second before she went back to normal Anko pride mode.

"Talk's cheap, kid. Let me finish your sorry ass off so I can get my damn present and go buy some dango. Your constant rambling has gotten me hungry."

Insert foxy grin. "Point proven, well if you insist, who am I to deny a request?"

Meanwhile inside the Kage's box

"Are they flirting?" Tsunade says slack jawed.

"Sure as hell looks like it. I'd like to know what this present is, hehehe"


"What the hell was that for? Don't you have work to do right now?"

"You're right about that, he sure did a number on all of them. I'm a little bit embarrassed that I can't get any of them conscious yet. You were right they never stood a chance. And now I know for sure he left her last on purpose. No way he could flirt like this with any of them around. I'm going to have to kick his ass for sending all of them to the hospital. Guy and Asuma are in the worst shape, but I think Naruto accidentally snapped one of Kakashi's ribs. Kurenai isn't in bad shape but she'll be bruised for quite a long time."

"Once again, I tried to tell you. Don't beat him though, this is child's play to him, and I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt them that bad, but they left him no choice and even then, he still took it easy on them. I can tell."

Back in the stadium

"Ready, punk?"

"On your call."

She grins evilly, then disappears

"My, my. Seems like someone's been paying attention to Snake and Fox."

She loops, circles, flips, cartwheels all the while slashing at him from side-to-side only to find him duck, sway his neck, shift his body, jump to avoid her feet and snakes. Finally after a few incredibly frustrating minutes, there's a crack and a yellow flash behind her locking her arms above her head with his hands on the back of her head, carefully making sure to hold her sleeves together. After securing her arms, he kicks her in the back of the leg dropping her to her knees with his legs perpendicular to hers to lock those as well.

She sat there completely immobile not even being able to send her snakes through the sleeves of her coat. With his legs crossed over the back of her knees she couldn't move her legs. With the leverage he had in his arms she couldn't even head-butt him. The only thing she could possibly think of was grind on him. It was a long shot but what other choice did she have?

He smiles "You lose."

She slowly backs up the only part of her body she still had control of and began grinding against the lower part of his body using his height he had over her to her advantage. He bit his lower lip and groaned a little. She grinned like a Cheshire cat.

"Oh, is that so?"

Before getting turned on and losing focus, he slowly lowered himself and bent back as well to avoid any unwanted attention, putting slightly more weight and pressure on the back of her knees. With his hands still holding her sleeves shut and pressed against the back of her head, he leans his head forward to the left side of hers. He whispers.

"Now that wasn't very nice, was it?" He says while lightly nibbling on her ear.

This sends shivers down her spine as she realizes her plan had backfired horribly. Her nipples were on the verge of getting hard which wearing only a mesh top would be incredibly difficult to hide without tying her trench coat together which might make it worse with the added friction. She reluctantly submits.

"You win." She declares hanging her head.

Back in the Kage's Box

"Did she just try what I think she did?" Taking her hands away from one of the jounin

Jiraiya only giggles perversely

"I think you're very right, but it seems to have backfired. Whatever he said to her made her quit quickly."

Standing up Tsunade approaches the front of the kage box to observe what used to be the stadium grounds that were littered with cratered walls and ground, cracked walls, chunks of earth missing and all sorts of mayhem. Sighing at the destruction and injured elites minus one Mitarashi Anko. She announces

"Although there doesn't seem to be anyone conscious at the time, I, the Godaime Hokage approve the promotion of Uzumaki Naruto to the rank of Jounin."

He immediately releases his deadlock on Anko and looks up at Tsunade.

"Thanks baa-chan."

The all too familiar vein appears on her forehead. She throws his jacket down to him and exclaims.

"I told you not to call me that! Now get out of here before I make you pay for the damage!"

Looking around the stadium he notices that it is pretty beat up. He smiles sheepishly while rubbing the back of his head and proceeds to leave the arena before stopping to talk to Anko.

"I'll see you later in the playground?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever, Naruto."

Slightly beside himself he asks. "Did you just call me Naruto?"

"What of it?"

"Oh nothing, I guess. See you later, Anko"

As soon as he was out of sight, she started panting while wiping the sweat off her forehead much like the first time they met in the forest. Jiraiya and Tsunade hop down to her location shouldering 2 'elite' jounin each.

"Well it looks like you got out easier than the others, eh Anko?"

"I figured if he wasn't going to fight without any jutsu's, punches or kicks AND no weapons, I'd have a shot. Guess I was wrong. Jiraiya-sama"

"Well I'm sure the present and date had nothing to do with it either, hmm?"

"Hey! I was going to get that present either way dammit! Naruto just got lucky is all!"

"Well it doesn't matter, he had already slaughtered these four and from where I was sitting, it looked like he didn't break a sweat. Plus, regardless he had you in a submission hold anyways. He beat all 5 of you fair and square. I swear he never ceases to amaze me."

"I tried to warn y-"


"Dammit Jiraiya, you sound like a broken record. Just shut up and help me get these 4 to the hospital. I'm assuming your okay Anko?"

"Yes, Tsunade-sama"

With that all 3 of them leave in a swirl of leaves.

Now sitting on a stool in Ichiraku's Ramen polishing off his 10th bowl of miso pork ramen, he leans back and rubs his stomach while having small talk with Ayame.

"So that's where all the noise was coming from this morning. Sounded like there was a war going on. Some of the villagers were actually starting to get worried. Well that's awesome you made jounin after only a week, Naruto!"

He just nods while grabbing a toothpick. At this point, the curtains part and everybody's favorite author decides to enter and order a single bowl of beef ramen. Ayame returns to cooking with her father.

"Care to tell me what that was back there?"

"Well, I was actually worried about them getting hurt more since I knew they weren't getting up anytime soon, that and I wanted some privacy when I was done wrapping them up."

"Not that you fool, I already knew that. You could have finished that a lot quicker so I could have gotten back to my research. Then again, I was awarded at the end of that battle. I must know what this 'present' is you plan on giving Anko, hehehe" He says giggling while staring at the ceiling with a lecherous grin plastered across his face.

At this point Ayame walks up to the bar and seeing the look on his face, she almost throws the bowl at him. Snapping out his perverted daze he catches the bowl with what seems to be well-learned ease, snaps some chopsticks and begins to eat his ramen while looking sideward's at Naruto. Naruto smiles with a wide grin.

"I'm going to take that cursed mark off of her shoulder."

Jiraiya begins choking on his ramen, pounding his chest trying to get it down his throat. After finally getting oxygen back to his lungs he had to ask.

"How can you do that? I got close to figuring it out but with a part of Orochimaru sealed inside it, I'm not sure how to get that out without hurting the person, and I don't even know what the extent of it would be. Then again, with that look on your face, I'm sure you have a pretty good explanation."

"Damn right I do, ero-sennin. I figured the exact same thing, but I've seen those seals a lot more then you have. Fundamentally what you say is true, and if someone did just try to remove it without using some sort of substitute seal, it would almost guarantee death. This is why the willing have always just had the inhibitor seal. You weren't around and I wasn't experienced enough to be able to create a counterseal that isn't bound only by the person's willpower, which we could both create now; but I can actually get rid of it, make it disappear. It would be like it was never there, plus whatever damage to her coils would start healing themselves after all these years."

"How exactly do you plan on doing this?"

"The best way I can describe it is that it would be almost like reversing the entire process he used in the first place. A few unique seals around hers, channel some chakra into them and then I bite her the exact same way she was bitten. His energy flows into mine where it's purified and ultimately expelled from my body shortly thereafter. My seals surround his, shatter his and then mine disappear. Just like that."

"Hmm cthat makes a disturbing amount of sense. The only person that could handle his evil would be you, and with the Kyuubi, especially this close to being absorbed, you could purify it yourself without even having to ask him to help, am I right about that?"

Naruto nods.

"Well, I'm not a huge fan of this present of yours, but it's a very well designed seal and the logic behind it is solid. However, I will be present for this to watch over whether you like it or not."

"I have no problem with that, meet me in baa-chan's office in 30 minutes?"

"You got it Naruto, good idea by the way, just like your father." He smiles and disappears in a swirl of leaves, while he vanishes leaving a track of yellow.

The Forest of Death: Inside the Tower

"What took you so long Naruto, is somebody all tuckered out?" She grins.

"Last time I checked, you were the one on your knees, Anko. I'm not here to joke around though. I wanted to tell you about your present. I didn't say this earlier, but it's your choice to accept or not. I know you're very touchy about this."

Having some sort of idea where this is heading, she still has to ask.

" cMy seal cWhat present has anything to do with this godforsaken branding!"

"Calm down, Anko. I told you earlier I've been working on this for a while now. I can make it disappear. No counter-seal, no inhibitor, just gone. I'm dead serious. I know what I'm doing. You'd never have to look at it in the mirror ever again."

She points her head to the ground at this. "You know, I thought after you killed him it would vanish. Then as the days went on, I got depressed because even after that fuck had been killed, there was still a piece of him on my shoulder smiling back at me. Normally I'd kill anyone for even saying what you just said, but we've been hanging out long enough for me to know when you're being serious. So cwhen?"

"According to the clock 15 minutes in the Hokage's office. Baa-chan will be there, and ero-sennin will be overseeing the process."

"I see c"

Sensing the tension, Naruto cracks the ice as only he can do.

"How about a game of deadly woman and fox? One lap around before we head over. I know you can do it, don't think I didn't notice you moving today. You've gotten faster, so let me whoop your ass for a lap, then we can get this over with, eh Anko-chaaaan"

She began to growl on the outside for him calling her that. Inside she didn't care, she was smiling, after hearing him calling her a 'dangerous woman', it reminded her of his speech earlier and she couldn't help but relax.

"Eh, so you did notice? Your smarter than you look, I guess. One lap it is, don't blame me if you get caught and I decide to play a game of 'what doesn't grow back'."

"Hahaha, catch me if you can." Crack and yellow flash, just like always.

"Damn Naruto, still that SAME distance. Well it's good training. Better head over to the office now."

"I've got a better idea." He says nearly causing her to almost jump out of her skin.

"STOP DOING THAT!" She honestly did hate when she was done running, he would ALWAYS show up standing upside down on the same branch directly beneath her.

"Haha. Sorry that just never gets old. Want to get there faster without you sweating anymore?"

"Sure, why not Naruto. And for your information, I'm not sweating, it's just humid in this forest"

As if he never moved, he's beside her. Quickly swooping her feet out from underneath her and catching her by the shoulders he leaves in a trail of yellow carrying her bridal style.

Inside the Hokage's Office

"Are you sure he can do it?"

"It's his first time doing it, but the theory and logic is solid. If anything he'll just end up hurting himself for a little bit till he can filter out the slime so to speak."

"Damn right I can do it." Naruto says from his and Jiraiya's perch outside Tsunade's window holding on to what appeared to be a very dizzy Anko.

"Let me guess, her first ride?" Naruto simply nods.

"Sorry about that Anko, forgot to tell you about that. The first few times are a real bitch."

Once regaining her composure she leapt out of his arms and punched him in the face.

"Jackass, you could have warned me, and did you REALLY have to carry me? I swear if anyone saw that, I'll kill you."

While Naruto rubs his jaw, Jiraiya responds for him.

"Actually for that to work he does have to carry you. And trust me, no one saw you. When he does that no one can track him, by the time you see the streak he's already been gone for a long time, just look behind you. Sure enough she looked behind her to just see the bright streak start to fade from sight. Somewhat satisfied with the answer, she adds.

"Well I never asked for a free ride, but it's too late for that, let's just get this started. How long is it going take?"

"About 30 seconds for you, probably a couple of minutes for me."

"Okay, I'm kind of confused, what does that mean?"

Naruto shrugs his shoulders.

"Don't worry about it, just come over here and pull your coat to side and hold it there until I'm finished."

She was about to come up with some sort of smart-ass remark, but decided to leave that until later. She was still wondering about the couple of minutes for him part though. She walks over to Naruto and pulls her trench coat to the side exposing her neck. Pulling out a brush and ink, Naruto quickly signs around the seal in a square formation, 'Life', 'Death', 'Dark', 'Light'. Putting aside the bottle and brush he touches her shoulder and pumps a little chakra causing the kanji to circle the seal. He then channels some of his kyuubi chakra to his teeth slightly elongating his canines. Without any hesitation, he sinks his fangs into the center of the seal on her neck. She cries out for a while before feeling her neck sizzling. She looks at the mirror in Tsunade's office to see for sure. 'It's gone! It's gone! I can't feel anything there anymore. My chakra finally feels normal again. That brat is a genius. Wait a minute c' she whips her head around to see Naruto sitting in one of the chairs clutching his chest with one hand and nearly shattering the arm of the chair with the other. Beads of sweat are rolling down his forehead freely at this point. What bothered her the most was that neither Jiraiya nor Tsunade were doing anything to help him.

"What the hell are you two doing? Help him!"

Jiraiya goes to raise his hand, but Naruto beats him to the punch.

"Don't worry cAnko cThis is part cof cthe plan :cough: just c:pants: give me ca minute."

She goes to grab him, but Tsunade holds her back. After a few minutes of him writhing around of the chair, he finally starts to breathe normally again. A little winded, but regulated. He stands up and wipes the sweat from his face while venting his shirt to try and dry out a little bit.

"Whew, that was a bigger pain in the ass then I thought it was going to be. Seems that asshole still has a good grip even being dead. By the way, kyuubi says thanks for the snack."

Tsunade and Jiraiya sweat-drop

"Good job, kid. I knew it'd work, bet your glad we spent so much time working on controlling the old fur-ball now, aren't ya?"

"Haha, you've got a good point there, ero-sennin."

'What the hell are they laughing about? Kid's nearly dying in the seat and those two don't do a damn thing. Now they're all laughing about it?' Strolling right in between the two and pivoting towards Naruto she cups his cheek and grabs the back of his head and proceeds to slam her mouth into his. Wide eyed at first, Naruto quickly closes his eyes and begins to enjoy himself until she pulls away leaving a trail of saliva between the two.

"Thank you, Naruto c"


"Now care to tell me why you were dying in the fucking chair before I tear your lungs out?"

"I'm going to assume you didn't tell her how you were going to do it, Naruto?" Tsunade speaks for the first time since they arrived.

Still rubbing his now swollen red cheek he chuckles very lightly so as not to incur the wrath of Anko, he puts his other hand behind his head in the Naruto pose ?.

"I didn't want to give her time to think about it, so I guess I left a few things out."

Jiraiya begins to laugh again only to get hit by both Anko and Tsunade.

"Left things out? You didn't tell me ANYTHING! Now what the hell just happened!"

Jiraiya picked himself up off the now dented floor while Naruto raised his hands in front of face and waved them slightly in a defensive fashion.

"Want to take over for me on the explanation, Jiraiya-sensei?"

"Ha, sucking up isn't going to work, dig yourself out of your own hole."

"Okay, be that way then."

Casting his eyes back at Anko he begins to explain.

"Well over the years of training with ero-sennin on seals and seeing that goddamn cursed seal more times then I care to count, I came up with a theory. This theory was only backed up when I killed Orochimaru. Essentially he seals a small part of his soul inside the seal causing an increasing amount of influence over the host every time a person's emotions are in turmoil or out of control. Now everybody knows that about the seal. Nobody could ever figure out how to remove it, the only thing anyone ever came up with was an inhibitor seal. No one could even figure out a counter seal. Ero-sennin could do a counter-seal, but only I can take one off. I'll leave the boring details of the seals out. Ultimately, I just basically placed a counter-seal around your inhibitor and when I bit you I broke both the seals and took his raw energy into myself. From then on, it was just a matter of time before I purified it and dispelled it from myself."

Anko's jaw dropped.

"That's where the whole pain thing came into play. That was his pitiful attempt at trying to get to me. That is until his power was devoured by kyuubi and I expelled the part of his soul. Those two knew what I was doing so that's why they weren't doing anything."

Trying desperately not to quiver, she responds.

"Holy shit, Naruto. Thank you, I haven't felt this good in a long time, without that stupid seal I might just be able to catch you now."

He laughs heartedly.

"Well, I'd love to stay baa-chan and ero-sennin, but apparently someone's going to try and catch me. Try, that is. Cya"

With that, he disappears in a flash followed quickly behind by a swirl of leaves that had an extra gust of wind then usual.

"I've never seen her that happy before. That kid sure knows how to change people, I almost can't wait to hand over my hat. I'm still pissed that none of our jounin are getting out for another week, though."

"Oh, chill out. Forget about those 4, they'll be okay. You should really worry more about those two. Hehehehe."


"Shut up, Jiraiya. You're lucky I needed you here for the sealing or you'd be peeling yourself off the North Gate. Now that's all sorted, want some sake?" She retrieves the 'secret' bottle.

He pulls a deck of cards out of seemingly nowhere as he summons gamakichi and Tsunade summons tatsutan "Damn straight, okay everybody, 5 card or hold em?"

At this time Shizune shows up with a stack of paper only to see a Hokage, a Sannin and two small summons playing poker while drinking sake. She immediately face faults.

"Tsunade-sama, don't you think you should be working right now?"

"Nah Shizune, I gave myself the rest of the day off in honor of Naruto's victory. You in or out?"

She sweat-drops as she pulls a seat up to the desk. "I'll take two cards, tatsutan."

Same time in the Forest of Death

"Damn, Anko-chan you have gotten faster, let's see if it helps." He bounds from tree to tree still keeping that same distance, picking up the pace to keep it that way.

"Don't call me that!" 'Damn Naruto, I'm twice as fast as I was a few hours ago and he's still not breaking a sweat. Shit, who cares, this is fun.'

Suddenly inspiration struck in Naruto's head and he started slowing down very slightly. 'Alright, time for a little payback, Anko.'

Over the next few hours, Naruto had carefully drawn back to a dangerous distance and Anko knew it. 'Your mine now Naruto. Should have kept that big mouth shut'

With a quicker than normal burst of speed she jumped to the side of him and kicked him across a branch right into the trunk of a tree kicking up dust and tree bark. When the dust cleared Naruto stood up and watched Anko place a kunai to his throat.

"Who's laughing now, Naruto-kun?"

Now it was his turn to start laughing, only softly so as not to put any more pressure on the kunai then absolutely necessary.

"What's so funny?"

Naruto slowly started to lean forward against the blade of the kunai drawing a small amount of blood from his own throat.

'What the hell is he doing? He's inching forward to me, is that blood? Is he insane?'

She had little time to think as Naruto drew his head back and in a flash he was behind her and spun her around and pushed her against the tree with the kunai still at his throat as he advanced, except this time he grabbed the small of her back with his hand.

'I knew he was toying with me! That bastard! He's still pressing his neck against the blade and he's placed his hand on my back. I've got to drop this before he kills himself.'

He watched her drop the kunai and then he grabbed the back of her head and pulled her waist into him as he slowly descended to her face.

'So this was his plan. What is he thinking? Oh well, worse things have happened to better people.'

He noticed her slowly let her tension release. He continued to lean down when she finally got frustrated and closed the gap and they began to slowly kiss up against the tree he had just been kicked into like a ragdoll. The light, soft, slow kissing continued for what seemed like an eternity. They both seemed to withdrawal at the same time with flushed faces and a light sweat covering their faces. At this time, both seemed to be thinking close to the same thing.

'Damn, that boy can kiss and we weren't even using our tongues. I'm even a little wet!'

'Man, I'm glad I kept our distance a little bit apart, I'm so hard it's hurting. I don't even want to know what this would be like if we were frenching.'

Both grasping the situation, they started to adjust themselves in various ways. Naruto was rearranging his pants painfully while passing it off as trying to wipe the bark and dust off himself. Anko had pulled her trench coat a little farther inward and lowered her mini skirt while also pulling her thigh mesh guards up a little also trying to mask it the same way by brushing dirt and bark off of her. Neither one was fooled, but they didn't dare say anything to each other. So each had slight satisfaction knowing they weren't caught by their attraction to each other.

'Are her nipples hard? She's wet. I can smell it. God, I hope she didn't see my pants.'

'Oh my lord, who's he trying to fool? You can't hide that. I guess he isn't a boy anymore. I just hope he didn't see my shirt or thighs. Damn mesh, can't hide shit.'

Naruto decided to finish this encounter as fast as possible.

"Well, Anko. Umm cnice hit at the end, it's nice to see your chakra can be used without being fucked with anymore. Same time tomorrow?"

"Umm cSure. Just remember, you owe me a date sooner or later."

"What are you talking about, you owe ME a date, I won it fair and square especially after that stunt you pulled in the office today."

"I was relieved and didn't know what to do, and don't act like you weren't dumbfounded, being man handled by me. It probably would have knocked you out if it weren't for those two being there! I would also remind you that you pulled the exact same stunt here!"

"Well at least you didn't get smacked for it!"

"I smacked you because I was worried and nobody would say a goddamn thing, and then you started to laugh! What was I supposed to do!"

"You could have at least let me explain before you went ballistic!"

"You were too busy laughing to care, you treat everything like it's a fucking joke. You pay no attention to those who are concerned. Just because THEY weren't worried doesn't mean I wasn't!"

Naruto took that one to heart. A heated argument had just turned into a severe reality check. He was damned to take it on the chin, but he refused to yell back, knowing full well she had done the same things in her past.

He hung his head to the ground speaking solemnly.

"I completely agree with you. However, if I had to guess, you've done the exact same thing over the years. Both us don't beg for death, but if I've mocked him, I know damn straight you have as well. Even if you don't realize it, that's another reason why we get along."

Anko stopped in her tracks out of her anger-induced tirade to ponder his words. That hit way close to home. She lowered her voice as well.

"Agreed. Enough for today, same time tomorrow?"

With absolutely no hesitation in his voice "Of course."

Later that Night

Naruto had been pondering the day's events while dragging his feet to the infamous dango shop. Flashing his jounin jacket, he went back to an empty booth. Ordering a bottle of sake to think of all that happened in one day. 'This is easily one of the oddest days of my life.' At this point the cruel hand of fate decided to intervene on his thoughts.

Every single member of the rookie nine minus sasuke and team 10 had discovered him and called him over to their booth with several seats spread at the front of the table. Reluctantly he decided to exit his booth to join them as not to draw any unnecessary attention. Constant endless banter ensued.

"I hear you passed your jounin exam today, Naruto" ?Sakura

"Congratulations, Uzumaki" ?Neji


"Took you long enough." ?Kiba

"Ummm ccongratulations cN-naru-uto-kun" ? Hinata

Much of the night went along like this until he excused himself rather woozy to join Genma and Kotetsu at the back of the restaurant, knowing he could avoid 2 people easier then 11. His assumptions were proven true until they started talking amongst themselves wondering where the rest of their group was.

"Well maybe they just decided to stay home tonight." Stated Naruto.

"Maybe one or two of them, but all 5 has never happened, even when most of them are out on missions."

"Who knows?" He smiles sheepishly

At this point a heavy swirl of leaves appears at the front of the booth, shocking both Genma and Kotetsu as they haven't seen a shuunshin that powerful in a long time. Anko usually arrived in an overly dramatic fashion, but not this powerful. Even the young 11 had to turn after feeling this wind knocking their glasses over.

"Evening, girls! I see even the rookie decided to show up tonight!" Anko so eloquently declared in her usual fashion, only now with a spike of chakra not felt by anyone who knew her, minus Naruto who had felt it hours ago.

"Well, it's nice to at least see one familiar face tonight. Where the hell is everybody else, Anko?" Genma asked.

Anko smirked extremely evilly, scaring even Genma and Kotetsu. Naruto knew where this one was going.

"Oh, don't worry about them, you'll see them in a week."

Kotetsu looked on confusingly.

"All of them got sent on a week long mission? Why would the Hokage need that much fire-power?"

Anko smiled from ear to ear

"Who said they were gone on a mission, right Naruto?"

Naruto sunk into his seat. Little did he know, the 11 had been listening since Anko had arrived.

"What does Naruto have to do with any of this?" Genma asked, not knowing yet how stupid this question was.

"Man, I would have thought jounin ninja would have noticed today's exam."

By now, the two jounin were extremely confused, not to mention the 11 that sat behind that were trying to listen intently from their own booth far away.

"Cut the cryptic crap Anko, what does any of this have to do with the rest of us?" Genma almost demanded.

"Pffft. If you want to get pissy about it, just go visit them in the hospital and ask them yourselves."

Genma, Kotetsu and the 11 dropped their jaws at the implication that the 4 elite had ended up in the hospital and that it had nothing to do with a mission.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean, Mitarashi-san?" asked a slightly concerned Sakura.

"Ask Naruto." Just as she pointed at him, there was nothing but a yellow blur while you could hear change clanking and bills floating down onto the table.

Anko started laughing hysterically with a sinister look on her face.

"I couldn't even see that with my eyes, what happened today Mitarashi-san?" asked Neji.

"Trust me, I would LOVE to tell you, but I would suggest just asking your sensei's tomorrow." She paused. "If they're awake that is." With that she disappeared with the fury of leaves she had appeared on in the first place.

Masking their eyes, everyone was thinking the same.

'What the hell is she talking about? I guess I better ask Gai/Asuma/Kakashi/Kurenai-sensei tomorrow.'

Forest of Death, midnight.

"Well it looks like you had your fun for tonight, eh Anko?"

A blast of leaves appeared a few feet away from a reclined blonde haired ninja.

"Oh come on, they'd find out eventually. It's much more entertaining this way. I didn't tell them anything. I just told them to go see their sensei's tomorrow."

"I guess you're right. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have fun today."

Anko finding a perfect chance to embarrass the poor boy, she declared.

"You're right, that was fun. But didn't you fight as well today?"

Naruto fought back a blush, silently cursing her. Thankfully, it was night and the red was easily hidden from its instigator. Slowly, Naruto stood and walked towards Anko. Quickly standing nose to nose, Naruto spoke.

"How about we skip 'playing' tomorrow and meet up at the dango restaurant at noon tomorrow, Anko-chan?"

Now it was her turn to fight back a blush. As much as she hated hearing chan, it was slowly growing on her despite the fact it has always used been as a taunt in the past. Refusing to be out done, she stood on her toes to whisper in his ears.

"See you then, Naruto-kuuuuun" Then she was gone in an explosion of leaves.

Shaking the tingling feeling he had felt all the way down to his toes, he left in a blur of yellow. Unfortunately, both had rather restless sleep that night.

'Why do I give a shit?'

'Why do I give a shit?'

Morning 10:00 am ? Forest of Death

Naruto rested his head back against the trunk of a tree while he lay on the ground itself, very unlike his normal routine. However, good luck to whoever tried to get close.

Anko had arrived to her sanctuary not long after him. She sat quietly, and even though she knew he could smell her, she sat silently, back against a tree high above him and closed her eyes.

2 hours later

Naruto lightly shook Anko's shoulder trying to wake her up. She put her right hand to a weapons pouch before she recognized her surroundings.

"Want some dango, Anko?"

Naruto points upwards to show the sun, which sat as high as it could in the sky.

"Noon already, eh? Well I might as well finish this silly bet as soon as possible."

Naruto smiles warmly and before she could protest he lifted her sorry ass up and disappeared in a blur. Being Naruto, he didn't even notice that she had put her arms around his neck this time around. Quickly dropping them as soon as they were outside the dango shop. They walked in and asked for a booth in the jounin section, which was incredibly empty at this time of day. They were led to the back and never even noticed walking by the 'Konoha Times', otherwise known as Sakura and Ino. The waiter arrived at the table and took their orders. Anko had ordered 20 sticks of natto dango and 10 sticks of beef dango while Naruto only ordered one stick of beef and fruit dango. Before she could ask if he even was hungry, there were two bright yellow blurs. When she opened her eyes, she saw 10 bowls of beef and miso ramen. Sighing heavily she watched as he devoured the bowls and flashed in and out just in time to trick the waiter.

With Sakura and Ino

"Hey Ino-pig, what is Naruto doing here? I've never seen him outside of Ichiraku's for as long as I can remember."

"Shut up forehead. Don't you remember last night? He was here with us for a while drinking sake before he disappeared to the back with Genma and Kotetsu."

"Your right, they were wondering about where our sensei's were before Anko showed up and started laughing, and then disappeared in a super-shuunshin. I've never seen anyone leave like that."

"I know, I heard something about the hospital and all of them being there. Have you made rounds today?"

"No, I've been training. I'll take rounds after lunch."

"Well, check in and see if you find anything out, I haven't seen Asuma-sensei today."

"I haven't seen Kakashi-sensei either, then again he's probably sitting in a tree somewhere reading Icha-Icha"

"Haha, you're probably right. I'll see you and the rest of us tonight, same time?"


With that they both dropped some bills and went there separate ways.

With Naruto and Anko

After Anko had polished off her dango with record speed, even impressing the king of eating himself. They got up to pay and before Anko could throw anything down, Naruto had flashed and returned. Needless to say, this pissed off Anko to no end. She is no princess who needs to have her meal paid for or have seat pulled out for her. As usual, an argument had ensued.

"What the hell was that? You didn't even eat here!"

"What are you talking about, I had some dango."

"Don't play dumb with me, you just paid for both of us!"

"Well, excuse me, I thought I owed YOU a date!"

"That's got nothing to with this. I'm not some little girl who needs to be coddled!"

"Well if you want to, you can leave the tip."

She clenched her teeth and you could almost see venom seeping from the corner of her mouth.

"You're dead."

"We'll see" and just like that he was gone in a flash to their meeting place at the tower in the forest.

Somewhere in the Forest of Death at 8:00 pm

Naruto had been pinned against a tree for the second night in a row, except this time, there was definitely no kunai. Naruto had removed Anko's hair tie and was gently stroking her hair as he worked on her lips, slightly working side-to-side pulling away only to avoid her nose. Anko had her hands attached to the back of his neck like a magnet. Every once in a while, Naruto would run his hand from the back of her neck up her scalp through her hair causing her to moan occasionally from the side of her lips. His other hand was running lightly at a frustratingly slow speed up from the side of her hip all the way up to her shoulder blade causing her to shudder at the delicate tickling and teasing. Deciding to call it a night they once again readjusted themselves. Once again, each brain wracked with thoughts.

':pant: :pant: Oh my god, it's even better than last night. I didn't even know my scalp could be as sensual as it was. Where has he been my whole life? So gentle and frustrating at the same time. That hand moving up my side barely grazing the side of my breast almost made me burst right then and there. :pant: :pant: He's not going to be the only one having fun though. It's just going to have to wait till tomorrow cWill there be a tomorrow? I'm thinking too much, he enjoys this just as much I do, but he doesn't want to jump me like the others. I'm confused.'

':pant: :pant: Oh my god, this was even better than last night. I can't believe I made her shudder and moan like that, maybe ero-sennin has rubbed off on me. I'm not a pervert, but I'm definitely enjoying the way she moves and sounds. :pant: :pant: I hope she doesn't think I'm using her, I really love our time together, even without this. I'm thinking too much. It's hard to tell what she's thinking. I'm confused.'

"Well, I guess I learned my lesson, Anko-chan, we split the bill next time."

"I told you I'd kill you the next time you called me that, Naruto-kun." She smiles.

"Okay, well I guess you'll just have to kill me then. Could you hold it off for a while though? I was kind of hoping we could meet up Genma and Kotetsu and grab a few drinks tonight, dango on me?"

"Well since your stupid ass insists, I guess I can spare some time" She smiles.

One explodes into leaves, the other shoots off in a yellow flash.

Entering at different times as not to arise any suspicion, Naruto walks by the booth housing the Konoha 11.

"Too good to hang out with us, Naruto?" Ino asks

He smiles and rubs the back of his head while standing in the Naruto pose ?.

"Not at all, it's just Kotetsu doesn't know when to back out, so I'm having fun taking his money since all I can take is D-Rank missions."

This seemed to satisfy everyone at the table and he made his retreat quietly letting their conversation cover his escape.

With the 11

"So, Ino-pig, I made my rounds today after lunch and I found out some extremely weird news. All of our sensei's ARE in the hospital."

"What forehead? You have got to be kidding me. What the hell happened to all of them?"

At this point in the conversation Neji, TenTen, Rock Lee, Kiba, Shino, Hinata, Shikamaru and Chouji were all listening with very shocked looks on their faces. Little did they know; everyone's favorite violet haired and supposed sadistic jounin was listening as well from the back of the restaurant.

"That's where things start getting strange."

"Spill it."

"Well, the first strange thing is that they were all admitted on the same day at exact same time by Tsunade and Jiraiya."

Jaws drop.

"I know what you're thinking, it wasn't them although Guy did look he had been on the wrong end of Tsunade's fist, but she swears she didn't do it, and I believe her."

Gaping continues.

"So after I'm done reading charts, I talk to Kakashi first, he only had a broken rib, but it was almost shattered. It looked like someone had already worked on it so it could heal properly. All he had to say was that he was hopping from roof to roof while reading Icha-Icha and fell on a light pole. Weird thing about that is he never admits to reading that smut, despite we all know he does. The next person I check on is Kurenai, she was the luckiest one of them all. She only had a few bruised ribs and a sore neck. She said she had been sparring with someone, but we all know she doesn't spar enough to get bruised ribs and a pretty tangled up neck. It looks like she was intentionally knocked out, and gauging the knot, it was for a long time. I checked on Asuma next. He had a severely broken jaw that also appeared to be worked on before he got in here, he'll be eating through a straw for about a week or two before we can get it reset into the right place. His excuse was probably the most ridiculous out of all of them. He wrote down on a piece of paper that he pissed Kurenai off and she put him under a genjutsu he couldn't get out of, so he started to hammer his face on a wall when he found one. Guy is by far the worst off out of all of them. He makes sense though, in a Guy type way. He said he was testing his youthfulness and accidentally opened up 6 gates. Only thing that's weird about that was that only his arms were broken and some middle spinal vertebrae were cracked and out of place. He can be fixed for sure, only by Tsunade, but still I could swear that opening up gates affected your entire body, not just certain parts."

Ino was the first to speak, as usual.

"Well it's all a little weird, I agree with you, but it does somewhat make sense."

"You sure are dull, Ino. Don't you understand they were ALL admitted at the EXACT same time?" Shikamaru decided to throw in his comment, despite the fact that it was troublesome. He was interested as well.

"This makes no sense. They were admitted by the Sannin at the same time with various injuries and somewhat lame excuses." Chouji comments while chowing down some super-sized pork dango

"The real weird part was that Tsunade was with me on rounds and after listening to them from room to room, she would laugh her ass off. By the time we left Guy's, she was almost crying. But like I said, I know she had nothing to do with it. Regardless, Kurenai will probably be the first one out."

At the table with Naruto, Anko, Kotetsu and Genma

Anko bursts into a fit of laughter, crying and banging her fists on the table after hearing all of their excuses.

"I know you heard that Naruto."

Naruto trying to suppress full-blown laughter replies.

"My, whatever do you mean Anko?"

"I fell onto a light pole, accidental youth, jaw genjutsu, imaginary sparring? You have got to be kidding me." As she still pounds her fist on the table

Needless to say, by this time, the 4 jounin have already had a round or two of sake. At this point, Naruto couldn't hold back his laughter anymore and started bawling with Anko while Kotetsu and Genma looked on confused.

With the 11

Unable to block out the laughter any longer, Sakura walks over to their table and pulls a Sakura ?.

"What's so damn funny, Naruto? I don't even see any cards over here, and aren't you underage?"

Wiping his eyes he replies.

"Old enough to kill, old enough to drink. Oh, and when you go back to the hospital tomorrow, ask them why their REALLY there. If they won't, find ero-sennin and ask him or wait till baa-chan is drunk and ask her."

For being incredibly book smart, Sakura was still confused out of her massive skull. Returning to her table, she tries to blank out the noise coming from the back booth.

"What was all that about, forehead?"

"Naruto just told me to ask them tomorrow why they were really there or ask Jiraiya about it."

The Next Day

"He did WHAT?" yelled Sakura

Jiraiya was trying to clean out his ears while hiding his research.

"Yup, that's my student for you. He took five jounin down with only a trickle of blood coming down his nose at the end. The only reason he even got hit was because he was trying to bring Asuma up to Tsunade when Anko got his ankles with her snakes and Guy landed a fully cocked back haymaker. You should have seen him! You should be glad, he made your work a whole lot easier for going soft on em'."

Sakura passed out only to wake up in Tsunade's office in a chair.

"So I guess that blabbermouth told you?"

She could only nod at this point not being able to form a coherent sentence.

"Well, in Jiraiya's defense he did try to warn me before-hand. Both of us probably should have been down there with those guys, but he refused to fight us. Those 5 have no one to blame but themselves. Kakashi told me he tried to warn them, but Naruto knocked him out first to stop any chance of them getting together, until it was too late."

Sakura passed out again to wake up in the same seat later on in the night to see Tsunade dipping into her secret stash.

"I'm sorry Tsunade-sama, but I have to go meet up with the other 10. Is it okay if I tell them?"

"Sure, knock yourself out, it's no village secret, just be prepared to wake them up if they're anything like you."

Sakura excused herself and began to run full speed to the restaurant to tell her friends.

Forest of Death 8:00 pm

Naruto had pinned Anko this particular night. He was holding her arms above her head as they kissed each other. As Anko was about to slip her tongue into his mouth he removed his lips eliciting a growl from Anko. He held her arms firm as he started to kiss the side of her cheek. Slowly placing butterfly kisses until he reached the side of her head and took a huge whiff of her hair. While her head was clear for that moment, she tried to free herself only to melt as he rolled her earlobe through his teeth in a rotating motion. He then licked the length of her outer ear. While not as satisfying as her earlobe, she still enjoyed the feeling, that is until he lightly blew on her now salivated ear. She went stiff and would have fallen to the ground if it weren't for him holding her up. Her legs were jelly and she was completely at his control. This frustrated her to no end, but there were no openings in his ministrations, she could only quiver and moan. He left her ear to lay kisses behind her ear. She could have swore she had purred at that point, but then he started to kiss lower and it just got more sensitive to her skin until he reached just above her collarbone and began to kiss, lick and bite lightly. Okay, this time she actually did fall. He was too low to stop her from freeing her hands. She fell into his open arms throwing hers around his neck resting her head over his shoulder breathing irregularly. They sat there on the ground for quite some time before she finally calmed down.

"You know, one of these days, you're the one who's going to end up being tortured like that." A hollow threat, but she really did want to hear him groan and grunt.

"That's torture? It sure as hell didn't sound like it from where I was standing."

"You don't understand, but you will, one day you'll get lax and then you're mine." She smiled evilly.

Suddenly his tone dropped to a low level.

"Do you mean that?"

She immediately felt the mood drop.

"What? Of course I do."

"I really do like spending time with you, ya know? The past few months playing tag; even if you can't catch me."

At this he got an elbow to his ribs.

"Despite how stupid it may sound to you, they have been some of the happiest moments I've ever had. This has nothing to do with what we've been doing for the past few nights. I've wanted to tell you this for a while."

Anko almost fell over. Completely recovered from the shock of ecstasy, she was met with another form of shock.

'What is he trying to say? Does he want to be with me? I can't deny it; he's made my life a lot more fun too. I've shot down my other friends a few times just to come out here to be with him. What should I do? He's handsome and makes me laugh, but he's also cocky and frustrates me to end, but I like those things about him. I know he's not lying. He went out of his way to take off my seal. Jiraiya couldn't even figure it out. That was the reason we ended up taking a break for a while che was helping me, and truth be told, I really did miss him. We've got so much in common, I'm surprised I haven't realized it before. Outcasts, pranksters and seek attention through unconventional means; however, we both rarely give a shit about anything in town. On a completely unrelated note, he was one kiss above my collarbone from making me orgasm out of my mind. He knows what I like, where I like it and just how long I want him to be there, and in pure passion, not lust. He's done nothing but go out of his way to make me happy, even when we aren't fooling around. I'm not exactly sure where this is going c but I know I want him, just like he wants me. I'm almost giddy, ALMOST. Fuck you, brat cNaruto.'

'God, I hope I didn't say anything wrong. I came here months ago to try and get away from everybody. Akatsuki is self destructing, Sound is leveled, whoopdy fuckin do. It doesn't change a damn thing here. I just wanted to be left alone, than I met her. Well, met her again to be correct. It was nice, I hadn't pranked anyone in years, and it felt great, especially after our first meeting. She went completely off the handle, but I could tell she wasn't really all that mad. We would get together for days and days on end just to chase each other around the forest for no damn reason. I know she has more of a life then me, so I hope she didn't upset anybody on my behalf. Truth be told, I had been working on that seal for a while after I remembered she had one. I soon became devoted to rising through the ranks, the normal way to show her I was a good ninja. Well, as normal it could be in my case. I could tell she wanted to laugh when I dropped off all the scrolls in our tower. Truth be told, I was glad my jounin test turned out the way it did. I had been trying to work up the courage for a while to ask her out, and I knew as long as I knocked all of them out and use her ego against her, she would stick up to her end of the bargain. That kunai kiss might not have been the best idea, but I'm glad I did. Why is this taking so damn long?'

Biting her lower lip Anko pulled her head back from his shoulder and looked in his eyes. No deception, no cockiness, no expectations, just affection.

Looking deep into Anko's eyes, Naruto could see a look of saddened confusion that was rapidly disappearing. On further inspection, he could see acceptance without condition and happiness.

Both their lips turned up in a happy smirk before they just hugged each other. Her head went back over his shoulder. He soon took the same position above her shoulders grabbing the back of her head just hugging her.

"Does this answer your question, Naruto-kun?"

"Yes, Anko-chan."

Sitting in each others arms just rocking back and forth, Naruto decided to ask even though he didn't want to move.

"Do you want to go meet up with Kotetsu and Genma and have a few drinks, Anko-chan?"

"No, I don't. We stay." The words flying out her mouth.

"Good, I don't want to leave either."

With that, they relaxed in the same spot for hours before Anko fell asleep. Quietly lifting her up, he disappeared in a flash of yellow. Laying her down on his bed, he carefully loosened the belts on her weapon pouches and slid them off her legs, setting them on the nightstand beside the bed; he pulled the sheets up to the bottom of her chin and then kissed her forehead. Grabbing a blanket, he rolled out the bed from his couch and promptly passed out.

A/N I know everybody has some questions. Some more 'mature' then the others, but since all of this is being uploaded at the same time, the last chapter should have most questions answered at the bottom. Please read and review and let me know what you think. First story, so criticism is welcomed.