(So in this chapter, we begin cultivating Marissa's "speshul" powers that every sue has ever. Looking forward to it? I know i'm not.)
ITS MY LIFE
CHapter 2 GLADOS, SEWISEDED? (Called it.)
Glaods was dead an I was Chell's sister! (Nicely summarised all that crap from Chapter 1)I o-mouthed at the shock (O mouthed? Really? Now I feel bad for using these emoticons ¬.¬)from all the revelation if only Glados hadn't sewiseded maybe she could give me the down lo. (What more could there be to it? You're her sister and you're a super special snowflake sue. End of.)But I did no two things 1 I had to find Chell an tell her the big newds (Big newds...that can't be an accident.)an 2 what happed to Wheetly I had to fin doubt. (But you DO know. You said so in the last chapter, moron.)Juts then Atals an P-Boy came in teh room lookin even madder than befour. (Madder than befour, but not befive.)
"Your gonna pay now you dumb b****!" Shotted P-Boy while Altas lolled an wrote mean things on my facebook LIKE A SERTAN OTHER SOMEONE! (Yow! Take that readers! You just got blazed!)I held one hand tite to my portal gun (Again, two hands to weild.)an got ready to fight them when a strange feelin came over me. It was all matrixy an slow-mo (Because that's never been done before.) but also like electric I could see all the sparks an wires an things in the robots. (So you've got Batman's detective scope from Arkham Asylum?)
"POWER OAF!" (Why do i get an image of BRIAN BLESSED at that?)I yelled for some reson I didn't no why an the two robots went dead. (They just died. No reason. Just flopped over and stopped working.)Electic lightening (Redundantly redundant.)came thru my skin an eyes an mouth an everywhere but I was not shocked. Some of teh bolts hitted Glados an she became alife a gain! (So, they can destroy robots and also bring them back to life? I guess that can make sense...if GLaDOS wasn't running on oil/robot blood!)
"YOU STOPED MY SEWISED MARISSA ROBERTS THAT WAS NOT NISE!" Glados angered loud (Again, GLaDOS is ooc. Sort of. I mean the whole "not nice" bit is like a dumbed down version of her troll logic.)an started cutting herself to make a new dead. (For God's sake...)I just locked at me hands where little lighting bolts was still happening an thot "What is goin on!" (I think everyone reading this crap has the exact same question in mind.)Gladoss aw the sparks an o-mouthed. (There's that wonderful expression. AGAIN.) "YUR POWERS THEY ARE MANIFASTING YOU MUST FIN DCHELL!" (And GLaDOS is helping her, why?)I was soooo confused an angry for Glados no telling me I had speshul powers, I coulda used them to solve TESTS (Yes, i'm sure lightning magic would've surely helped you during that button pushing test.). But I did wanted to meet Cheel an let her no were sisters an I have cool robot powers. "ILL EXPLANE (Once a plane, but no longer.)EVER THING LATER FIRST YOU MUST GET TO CHELL SHE IS IN SPACE LOOKIN FOR WHEETLY!"(So Aperture have space travel down now? Guess it was only a matter of time.) I o-mouthed (That expression only gets more grating each time I see it…), Chell new how ot space flight an was savin Wheetly? I was sooooo happy now but didt no how to go space. (Go bug NASA, i'm sure they have a shuttle to spare.)
"But how can I space?" (How i do talk English good.)Glados lolled an sad "YOU HAVE MORE POWERS THAN YOULL EVER NO BUT ONE IS SPACE FLY AND BRETHING!" (Well gee, that's convenient. I'm sure its not lazy writing. Nope. Not at all.)This was sooooooo shocking I thot hard about flyin an suddenly rocks came out of my feet an I started to fly (By using rocks? Just...how?!)up past the portal labs (APER-FREAKING-TURE)an into space. When I got to the moon I looked fro Chell n Wheetly. (They were just in space. Not necessarily on the moon.)I STARted (hehe becos its in space where there are stars) (HAHAHAHAHA! HILLARIOUS!)lookin behind asterods an space junk but they wasn't there. Then I rembered, in space noone can here you scream! (Well duh.)So I couldn't here them, unless maybe I have another special power! (Wouldn't that just be a plot contrivance...)
I thot hard to try an listen when I heard something it was….. WHEETLY! "You bloody sod stop oh god save the queen!" (Ye gods...please...please don't try the fake British wordy accent...please...). Chell was there an she was beeting him up (lol) an Wheetly was all broken lookin. My heart fell but the sight of my tru love gave me MORE POWER an I flew towars him.
"Cheel stop hurtin Wheetly!" I begged to her. Chell looked right at me with a lot of hatred (I like this Chell. Clear hatred for the sue is always good.)an some sad too an said:
"Wheetly went evil an tried to kill me an I bet he tried to kill you too because we're sisters (Wait, how did Chell know? GLaDOS was pretty sure she didn't...)Im sorry I never telled you Marissa." I o-mouthed (HNGH)again at the revelation. Chell new we were sisters the hole time? But Glados sayd she didn't tell her, that was when I realized it was trap. (Oh... kinda dumb of GLaDOS then.)
"Help me Marrissa this bloody bugger is trying to wank me!"( *sigh* I really hate it when people throw in random British words, assuming that's how we talk. That sentence is terrible -.-) Wheetly pleaded as Chell kept beeting him up.
"Yur not Chell, yur GLADOS!" I screamed an "Chell" got a "Oh S***!" look on her feces.(EUGH!) I punched fak Chell in her face an the skin ripped off to show that she was a robot like the Terminator but instead of terminator it was Glados! (…that's actually not a bad image. Also, how did she punch a robot hard enough to rip the skin off?)"Why did you trick me?" (Because you're a dumbass?)
"I wanted revenge for you stopping me from sewisding!" (Then why not just kill her? Wouldn't that be far more simple?) Glados robot screemed. (Again. She doesn't scream.)Befour I could get MY revenge of Glados Wheetly yelled out real loud!
"BLOODY HELL IT'S A SODDING ASTEROD HEADED STRATE TOWARDS US!" (Every time I hear someone try this, I die a little inside.) I looked an saw the Asterod it was bout to hit us when…..
TO BE CONTINUED! (You fucking tease.)
HOW DID I SURVIVE THAT? (Very nice. Leave us on a cliff-hanger and reveal you survived anyway. Very classy.) WHERE ALLS THE POWERS COMING FROM? FIND OUT IN CHAPTER THREE WITH EVVEN MORE INTENSE ACTION! (Fun fact, we don't learn about her powers til chapter 15 or so.)
To all the flamerz I got a good review so there, pepole like my story an yur just trolls. (Irony being the writer herself is a troll.)
The pepole tryin to give consertive criticism tell me what you don't like or yur as bad as the REAL TROLLS! (That's nice. Insult the people who like and dislike you. Truly the route of success.)
(It only gets worse from here folks. Next chapter we start on the "retarded Chell "subplot. Fun times!)